Butler Jokes
46 butler jokes and hilarious butler puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about butler that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Looking for a good laugh? Check out this collection of funny Butler Jokes that will have you in stitches! These jokes cover famous butlers, such as Jimmy Butler, Knox Anderson, and Davis, as well as English and Black Butler jokes. Get ready to have a good time with these rib-tickling jokes!
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Funniest Butler Short Jokes
Short butler jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The butler humour may include short butcher jokes also.
- I recently quit my job as a butler at a stately home. I refuse to be ordered around in that manor.
- What did Batman say when he found a stranger in the Batcave? I can't believe it's not Butler
- Mr.Bates gets a butler (My dad told me this joke)
Butler:Good Morning Mr. Bates.
Bates: Please address me as master from now on
Butler: My sincere apologies Master Bates... - James Bater had a tough time finding a butler. Every single one he employed kept calling his son Master Bater.
- What do the elderly lord, lady and butler all have in common? They all died in the same manor.
- How many optimists does it take change a light bulb? NONE!
The butler changes the light bulb. - What did Rhett Butler say when asked for a river containment wall Frankly, I don't give a dam.
- What did the butler say to the German Scientist when they ran out of whine? Nein wine, Einstein.
- What did the butler say to one orphan while taking care of another orphan with emetophilia? Robin, get the Bat more bile.
- How do you know you're a Seattle Seahawk? A butler serves you.
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Butler One Liners
Which butler one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with butler? I can suggest the ones about chairman and waiter.
- My friend has hired a Butler without a left arm. Serves him right.
- What do you call a butler with false teeth? An indentured servant.
- I wanted to hire a marsupial butler... but none of the applicants were koala-fied.
- One arm butlers they can take it but they can't dish it out…
- A friend of mine has a butler whose left arm is missing. Serves him right
- I think I'm falling in love with my friend's butler. Serves me right.
- What is the perfect name for an Indian butler? Mahatma Coat
- What do you call a butler with a new set of teeth? An endentured servant
- Imagine if Norman Bates had a butler. How can I help you today, Master Bates?
- I can't believe my son is dating a butler. It's Adam and Eve, not Adam and Jeeves.
- A lady and her butler..
- What do you call a depressed butler? A coat hanger.
- What do you call an Indian butler? Ma hat Ma coat
- James Bond was trained by Chuck Norris, as his butler.
- Whats the best name for an Indian butler? Mahat Macoat
Black Butler Jokes
Here is a list of funny black butler jokes and even better black butler puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What do Batman and Black Sabbath have in common? They both have a g**... butler.
Rib-Tickling Butler Jokes that Bring Friends Together
What funny jokes about butler you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean baker jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make butler pranks.
A lady calls her butler into her room and says, "Jeeves, take off my dress"
He casually says, "Yes, Madam", and removes the dress. Then she says, "Jeeves, take off my underwear". Again, he says, "Yes, Madam" and removes the undergarment. She then says, "Jeeves, take off my bra". Again, with no hesitation he says, "Yes, Madam" and removes the bra. Then she says, "Now out of my sight! If I ever catch you wearing my clothes again, you're fired!"
A wealthy man on a business trip calls home and the butler answers the phone: Can I talk to my wife, please?
The butler answers that she is currently in the bedroom with a man. What?!! Take the rifle in my study, go to the bedroom and shoot them both - I'll stay on the line
Very well, sir , the butler answers and he walks away from the phone. After about a minute, the man hears two gunshots and a moment later, the butler returns to the phone.
I shot them both, sir. What should I do with the bodies?
I don't care, throw them in the pool
We don't have a pool, sir
Ah, sorry, wrong number
A Rich Woman And Her Butler
A rich couple was going out for the evening. The lady of the house decided to give the butler,
Throckmorton, the night off.
She said they would be home very late and he should just enjoy his evening.
As it turned out, the wife didn't have a good time at the party, so she came home early.
She walked into the house and eyed Throckmorton sitting alone in the dining room.
She called for him to follow her. She led him to the master bedroom.
She closed and locked the door. She looked at him and smiled.
"Throckmorton. Take off my dress." He did so, carefully.
"Throckmorton. Take off my stockings and garter." He silently obeyed her.
"Throckmorton. Remove my bra and p**...." The tension mounted as he complied.
Finally she looked at him and said,
"Throckmorton. If I ever catch you wearing my clothes again, you're fired."
A rich woman feigns illness andbleavesba party early
When she gets home, she calls the butler to her bedroom.
"Jeeves? Take off my coat."
"Yes, madam."
"Jeeves, remove my high heels."
"Yes, madam."
"Jeeves, unzip my dress, and remove it...throw it on the floor!
"Yes, madam."
"Jeeves, remove my brassiere and p**...."
"Yes, madam."
"Jeeves?"
"Yes, madam?"
"If I ever catch you wearing my clothes again, you're fired."
Mrs. Applebee, the 6th grade teacher, posed the following problem to one of her classes:
"A wealthy man dies and leaves ten million dollars. One-fifth is to go to his wife, one-fifth is to go to his son, one-sixth to his butler, and the rest to charity. Now, what does each get?"
After a very long silence in the classroom, Little Johnny raised his hand.
The teacher called on Little Johnny for his answer.
With complete sincerity in his voice, Little Johnny answered, "A lawyer!"
I managed to get a butler who works for free
I normally have really rotten luck, but I managed to get a butler who works for free. However, when I saw him, I realised he has lost his left arm;
Serves me right...
Lord Williams turns to his butler
Lord Williams turns to his butler: "Jones, please prepare my black suit and binoculars. I'm going to a f**...."
"But why do you need binoculars?" Asks Jones
"My distant relative has died." Says Lord Williams
A 6th-grade teacher posed the following problem to one of her arithmetic classes:
A wealthy man dies and leaves ten million dollars.
One-fifth is to go to his wife, one-fifth is to go to his son, one-sixth to his butler, and the rest to charity.
Now, what does each get?
After a very long silence in the classroom, one little boy raised his hand.
With complete sincerity in his voice, answered, A lawyer!
A man by the name of Ronald Bates came home to find his butler being arrested...
"What in the world could my butler have done to be arrested?" Bates asked the police officer handcuffing the butler.
"We had a complaint from you next door neighbor that he was yelling obscene remarks," the police officer replied.
"Obscene remarks?!?! What was he saying?!?!"
"The neighbors say that, for a few minutes on end, he kept yelling 'Masturbates,' 'Masturbates!'
A Male g**......
A male g**... who doesn't have s**... with his client is a butler.
Did you read that somewhat r**... novel about Jeeves the butler?
It was written by PG-13 Wodehouse.
