Butch Jokes
51 butch jokes and hilarious butch puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about butch that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Butch Short Jokes
Short butch jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The butch humour may include short buttocks jokes also.
- My friends are named after what they do... My friend Butch is a butcher, my friend Taylor is a tailor, and my black friend's name is Rob
- A headline: Elderly Man Found Pushing Stroller With Body Parts sounds butch worse than Man taking grandchild to the park
- People protesting about Butch Hartman on social media just delights me. Because Butch is such A Tough (or is it T.U.F.F) Puppy
- What do gay horses eat? Heyyyyyyyy
What do lesbian butch horses eat?
Hey (in manly voice) - A lesbian couple were smoking w**... together. One was a high femme, the other was a s**... butch.
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The Funniest Butch Jokes for a Bone-Shaking Laugh
What funny jokes about butch you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean chick jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make butch pranks.
My butcher introduced me to his wife the other day...
He brought her out and said,
"meet patty"
The butcher backed up...
The butcher backed up to the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.
A butcher is found dead, crushed under a side of beef.
I guess for that butcher, the steaks were just too high.
Why was the butcher worried?
Because his job was at steak.
I went to the butchers the other day and bet him 50 quid that he couldn't reach the meat off the top shelf.
He sai: No, the steaks are too high.
A butcher married a baker and had a kid who grew up to be what?
Fat.
What was the butcher doing when he got caught?
Beating his meat.
My butcher is very rude
I asked him for a cut of pork and he gave me the cold shoulder
How did the butcher introduce his wife?
Meat Pattie
Why was the Butcher depressed?
Because his life was in shambles.
Which E.D. is worst, Erectile Dysfunction or Explosive Diarrhea?
The man blushed and answered in almost a whisper: erectile dysfunction..
The embarassed woman also said: erectile dysfunction.
The butch lesbian hesitantly replied: erectile dysfunction.
The gay guy without hesitation answered: depends if you're top or bottom.
You ever been to the butcher with the chastity f**...?
Say what you will about the lifestyle, but his meat simply can't be beat.
Why did the butcher get fired?
For bringing home the bacon.
Why was the butcher fired?
Because he was caught *beating his meat*!
I was at the butchers the other day
And i thought while i'm there i'd have a gamble with the butcher. I bet him £10 that he couldn't reach the meat on the top shelf, he said "nah mate, i'm not taking that bet, the steaks are too high."
How does the butcher introduce his wife?
Meat Patty.
(This was told to me by an old man I cut off with my grocery cart at the grocery store).
Why do butchers avoid buying cattle from Colorado?
Because the steaks are too high.
I went to the butchers and asked if he had a lambs head
No he replied, it's just how I come my hair.
If you got a butcher who is 6'2, what does he weigh?
Meat.
A butcher that backs into a meat grinder
Gets a little behind in orders
What was the butchers name who was also a knight?
Sir l**....
What did the butcher do after he forgave the thief?
He let him off the hook.
Why did the butcher get fired?
He kept playing with his meat in front of the customers.
The Butcher offered me 8 legs of venison for only $10!
But for me, it was still 2 deer.
A Butcher is Selling Meat and Has One Chicken Left
A butcher is selling meat at his shop and is down to his last chicken.
A woman comes into the store and approaches the butcher. She asks the butcher for a chicken.
The butcher goes into the freezer and pulls out his only remaining chicken. He returns and puts it on the counter.
The woman takes a look at the chicken and asks the butcher if he has any larger chicken.
The butcher takes the chicken and puts it back in the freezer. He waits a minute, pulls the same chicken back out of the freezer, and returns. He puts it in front of the woman and says this is a bigger chicken.
Great! Says the woman, I'll take them both!
What did the butcher say when kicked in the g**...?
I've got some tender l**...
Why didn't the butcher attempt to get the meat from the top shelf off of his rickety ladder?
The steaks were too high.
I'm a butcher and I sell dead chickens at work
They aren't going cheep
What did the butcher say to the bad meat?
"You were a misteak."
Why didn't the butcher cross the road?
He didn't want to brisket
What did the ignored butcher say?
Everybody needs my meat but nobody meets my needs.
The butcher didn't want to fire the midgets on his staff, but they couldn't get the meat off the top shelf
The steaks were just too high
A butcher is 5'10" and has a 38" waist. What does he weigh?
Meat.
The butcher
A butcher gets his finger stuck in a slicer and cuts it off. He spends all day at the hospital getting the stump sewn up, then calls his wife.
"Honey, I'm in the hospital," he says. "I accidentally cut off my finger, but I'm OK."
"Oh, God!" she cries. "The whole finger?"
"No. The one next to it."
What does a butcher call a cow on a hill?
High Steaks
I went in the butchers the other day.
I said: "You've got a sheep's head in the window."
The butcher said: "That's a mirror."
What did the butcher say to the cow.
Bye.
What did the butcher say to do incase there was a fire?
Grab your meat and beat it
I had a butcher come into my shop and introduce me to his wife...
He said, "Meet Patty".
A butcher is 5 ft 3 inches tall, what does he weigh?
Meat
A butcher slicing bacon backed up into his machine.
He got a little behind in his orders.
My butcher once gave me beef from a female cow.
I said, "I believe this is a Miss Steak".
The butcher shouldn't put the names of the cows on the packaging.
I feel really bad eating good old Chuck.
Why did the butcher get fired?
He kept making misteaks.
There was once a butcher who accidentally backed into a meat grinder
As a result, he got a little behind in his work
Where does the butcher go to dance?
At the meatball.
What did the butcher say about the cow that got away?
Sounds like a missed steak...
My butcher has started making sausages from seabirds....
Today he has taken a tern for the wurst.
Do you know about the butcher that kept accidentally backing into the meat grinder?
He always got a little behind with his orders
Why do butchers make the best veterinarians?
They can cure a pig after it's already died.
