The Best 47 Butch Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Butch jokes. There are some butch musically jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these butch gaelic puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Butch Jokes and Puns

My butcher introduced me to his wife the other day...

He brought her out and said,

"meet patty"

The butcher backed up...

The butcher backed up to the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.

A butcher is found dead, crushed under a side of beef.

I guess for that butcher, the steaks were just too high.

Butch joke, A butcher is found dead, crushed under a side of beef.

Why was the butcher worried?

Because his job was at steak.

I went to the butchers the other day and bet him 50 quid that he couldn't reach the meat off the top shelf.

He sai: No, the steaks are too high.

A butcher married a baker and had a kid who grew up to be what?


What was the butcher doing when he got caught?

Beating his meat.

Butch joke, What was the butcher doing when he got caught?

My butcher is very rude

I asked him for a cut of pork and he gave me the cold shoulder

How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meat Pattie

Why was the Butcher depressed?

Because his life was in shambles.

Which E.D. is worst, Erectile Dysfunction or Explosive Diarrhea?

The man blushed and answered in almost a whisper: erectile dysfunction..

The embarassed woman also said: erectile dysfunction.

The butch lesbian hesitantly replied: erectile dysfunction.

The gay guy without hesitation answered: depends if you're top or bottom.

You can explore butch sissy reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean butch quips dad jokes. There are also butch puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

Why did the butcher get fired?

For bringing home the bacon.

Why was the butcher fired?

Because he was caught *beating his meat*!

I was at the butchers the other day

And i thought while i'm there i'd have a gamble with the butcher. I bet him £10 that he couldn't reach the meat on the top shelf, he said "nah mate, i'm not taking that bet, the steaks are too high."

How does the butcher introduce his wife?

Meat Patty.

(This was told to me by an old man I cut off with my grocery cart at the grocery store).

Why do butchers avoid buying cattle from Colorado?

Because the steaks are too high.

Butch joke, Why do butchers avoid buying cattle from Colorado?

I went to the butchers and asked if he had a lambs head

No he replied, it's just how I come my hair.

If you got a butcher who is 6'2, what does he weigh?


My friends are named after what they do...

My friend Butch is a butcher, my friend Taylor is a tailor, and my black friend's name is Rob

A butcher that backs into a meat grinder

Gets a little behind in orders

What was the butchers name who was also a knight?

Sir Loin.

What did the butcher do after he forgave the thief?

He let him off the hook.

Why did the butcher get fired?

He kept playing with his meat in front of the customers.

The Butcher offered me 8 legs of venison for only $10!

But for me, it was still 2 deer.

A Butcher is Selling Meat and Has One Chicken Left

A butcher is selling meat at his shop and is down to his last chicken.

A woman comes into the store and approaches the butcher. She asks the butcher for a chicken.

The butcher goes into the freezer and pulls out his only remaining chicken. He returns and puts it on the counter.

The woman takes a look at the chicken and asks the butcher if he has any larger chicken.

The butcher takes the chicken and puts it back in the freezer. He waits a minute, pulls the same chicken back out of the freezer, and returns. He puts it in front of the woman and says this is a bigger chicken.

Great! Says the woman, I'll take them both!

What did the butcher say when kicked in the genitals?

I've got some tender loins

Why didn't the butcher attempt to get the meat from the top shelf off of his rickety ladder?

The steaks were too high.

I'm a butcher and I sell dead chickens at work

They aren't going cheep

What did the butcher say to the bad meat?

"You were a misteak."

Why didn't the butcher cross the road?

He didn't want to brisket

What did the ignored butcher say?

Everybody needs my meat but nobody meets my needs.

The butcher didn't want to fire the midgets on his staff, but they couldn't get the meat off the top shelf

The steaks were just too high

A butcher is 5'10" and has a 38" waist. What does he weigh?


People protesting about Butch Hartman on social media just delights me.

Because Butch is such A Tough (or is it T.U.F.F) Puppy

The butcher

A butcher gets his finger stuck in a slicer and cuts it off. He spends all day at the hospital getting the stump sewn up, then calls his wife.

"Honey, I'm in the hospital," he says. "I accidentally cut off my finger, but I'm OK."

"Oh, God!" she cries. "The whole finger?"

"No. The one next to it."

What does a butcher call a cow on a hill?

High Steaks

I went in the butchers the other day.

I said: "You've got a sheep's head in the window."

The butcher said: "That's a mirror."

What did the butcher say to the cow.


What did the butcher say to do incase there was a fire?

Grab your meat and beat it

I had a butcher come into my shop and introduce me to his wife...

He said, "Meet Patty".

A butcher is 5 ft 3 inches tall, what does he weigh?


A butcher slicing bacon backed up into his machine.

He got a little behind in his orders.

My butcher once gave me beef from a female cow.

I said, "I believe this is a Miss Steak".

The butcher shouldn't put the names of the cows on the packaging.

I feel really bad eating good old Chuck.

Why did the butcher get fired?

He kept making misteaks.

There was once a butcher who accidentally backed into a meat grinder

As a result, he got a little behind in his work

Where does the butcher go to dance?

At the meatball.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the butch embarassed jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working butch western piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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