Burt Jokes
10 burt jokes and hilarious burt puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about burt that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Cheerful Fun Burt Jokes to Brighten Your Day with Humor and Joy
What is a good burt joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
What do you call a cremated Burt Reynolds?
Burnt Reynolds.
I work with a guy who looks like Burt Reynolds.
He's from Ghana so we call him Burnt Reynolds.
If Burt Reynolds gets cremated
He will be Burnt Reynolds
News.. Burt Reynolds dead.
his family say he will be cremated. So this time he will be more smokey than bandit.
Too soon?
How long til somebody writes a rap song about Burt Reynolds?
Why did Burt start Burt's Bees?
Because after he discovered Ernie, he lost all interest in birds.
What do birds, Burt Bacharach, and laundry have in common???
They long to be clothes to you.
Burt and Mack are climbing Mount Everest.
Burt and Mack are climbing Mount Everest when suddenly Burt falls in to a crevasse 1000 ft. deep.
Hey Burt! Are you alive? shouts Mack from above.
Yeah I am.
I'm going to drop down a rope, grab onto it and I'll pull you out.
I can't. My arms are broken.
Okay then wrap your legs around them.
I can't. My legs are broken too.
Alright, then bite down real hard on the rope. I'll pull you up.
So Burt bites on the rope and Mack starts pulling.
1000 feet… 900 feet… 700 feet…. 500 feet…. 300 feet…
You alright Burt?
Yeahhhhhhhh….hhhhhhh…
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Burt and Arthur are playing golf
As Burt is eyeing in a putt on the 14th, a f**... procession drives slowly down the road right next to the green. Burt drops his putter, removes his hat, bows his head and mutters in a respectful manner.
Arthur congratulates Burt on his display of respect and says he didn't know Burt had such respect for the deceased, especially in the middle of a shot.
Burt replies well usually I wouldn't bother, but after 45 years of marriage I guess it's only fair to her
Burt and Marcus
Burt's worked on the railroad for several years as a laborer but all the constant layoffs have got him looking into moving up in the business and he applies for a job working on the actual train. He gets called in for an interview and it's going ok when they get to the final question. The interviewer says "Burt, you are on Train A and it's traveling west at 75 mph but on the same track is Train B traveling east at 85 mph. There is no way for Train A to stop or slow down. What would you do?" Burt hems and haws for a few minutes and then tells the interviewer "Well, I reckon I'd call my brother Marcus."
"Call your brother? Why"
"Well, Marcus ain't never seen no big train wreck before."
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