Burger And Fries Jokes

38 burger and fries jokes and hilarious burger and fries puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about burger and fries that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Quick Jump To

Funniest Burger And Fries Short Jokes

Short burger and fries jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The burger and fries humour may include short burgers fries jokes also.

  1. I called my wife and said that I'll pick up burger and Fries on the way home from work. I was met with stony silence. I think she's beginning to regret letting me name the twins.
  2. My teacher used to tell me that I would never amount to anything by looking out of the window all day Man did I feel smug as I passed him his burger and fries at the drive-through last night
  3. I just got out of the doctors office. Doctor: Don't eat anything fatty.
    Me: Like what, burgers and fries?
    Dr: No, fatty, don't eat anything.
  4. I had a heated discussion with an art historian yesterday We disagreed on whether I ordered curly fries or mozzarella sticks with my burger
  5. I remember my teacher telling me that looking out of the window wouldn't get me anywhere. Boy, did I have a smug look later when I handed him his burger and fries at the drive-thru!
  6. What do you say to a female that studied gender science? Could I have the burger with fries please?
  7. I feel really gay having just eaten burger and fries I'm just so happy to have Five Guys inside of me.
  8. The boy that used to bully me at school still takes my lunch money.... He serves up a great burger and fries.
  9. Why does the Dairy Queen have small fries? Because the Burger King forgets to wrap his Whopper!
  10. A guy walks into a library And asks for a burger and fries, the librarian replies
    "Sir this is a library"
    And so the man responds
    "Id like a burger and fries please"

Share These Burger And Fries Jokes With Friends

Burger And Fries One Liners

Which burger and fries one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with burger and fries? I can suggest the ones about burger fries and fries.

  1. What do you call a Burger King on a deserted island? Lord of the fries
  2. What is a burger's favorite day? Fry-day
  3. Epicurean One-Liner The death row inmate eats burgers and fries.
  4. Burger King: Have a chicken fry again! But Sensei, I thought they could arways fry

Burger And Fries Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.

What funny jokes about burger and fries you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean mcdonald fries jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make burger and fries pranks.

A drunk walks into a library...

He goes up to the desk and slurs: I'll have a burger, fries and a milkshake.
The librarian replies: Sir, this is a library!
***whispers*** Sorry, I'll have a burger, fries and a milkshake.

An elderly couple goes to Burger King, where they carefully split a burger and fries. A trucker takes pity on them and offers to buy the wife her own meal.''It's all right,'' says the husband. ''We share everything.''

A few minutes later, the trucker notices that the wife hasn't taken a bite. ''I really wouldn't mind buying your wife her own meal,'' he insists.''She'll eat,'' the husband assures him. ''We share everything.''Unconvinced, the trucker implores the wife, ''Why aren't you eating?''The wife snaps, ''Because I'm waiting for the teeth!''

A blonde goes into a library and, speaking clearly and loudly, orders a burger, fries and a milkshake.

The librarian rolls his eyes and says, exasperated, "This is a library, ma'am."
So the blonde leans in and whispers, "Sorry. I'll have a burger, fries, and a milkshake."

Old couple goes to a fast food restorant.

They order one burger and fries, sit down and divide the burger and fries. A man from table next to them sees that and asks politely: "If you want, I can buy some extra food for you." "No thanks, we are a old couple, we share everything." Time goes by and the man is eating, but the woman is not. From the table next to them, the man asks again:"I really have no problem buying you food." Man replies:"Dodnt worry about it, she will eat! We share everything" But the stranger is not happy with that and asks the woman:"Why are you not eating?" Woman looks at him and says:"I am waiting for the teeth."

John learning Math

Teacher was teaching math to 5 yr old John.
Teacher: What is 5 - 5?
John: *Keeps Quiet*
Teacher: If you have 5 burgers and I take 5 burgers from you, what will you be left with?
John: French Fries.

A man walks into a library...

...The man walks up to the librarian and says "Can I have a burger and fries please." The librarian, confused, replies with "Sir, this is a library."
The man apologises, leans in closely and whispers "Can I have a burger and fries please."

A blonde walks into a library

She goes up to the librarian at the counter and says,
"Hello, can I get one cheese burger with a side of fries?"
The librarian, with a confused look, responds, "Sorry but this is a library."
The blonde pauses for a few seconds. She then whispers,
*"Can I get one cheese burger with a side of fries please?"*

A guy walks into a diner and sees the fry cook, with one arm, making hamburger patties by smashing meat under his armpit...

The guy complains to his waiter that using his armpit to make burger patties is the grossest thing a fry cook could ever do to prepare food.
The waiter responds, I assure you it's not. In the morning he makes donuts.

A blond walks into a library while talking on her phone.

When she gets to the front desk she says, "I will have two cheese burgers and s large french fry."
The librarian looks and her and says, "ma'am, this is a library."
The blond looks around and sees all of the shelves full of books. She is very embarrassed, hangs up her phone, and leans forward to whisper, "I will have two cheese burgers and a large fry."

Annual medical check

A man went in for his annual medical checkup and the doctor said "dont eat anything fatty"
The man sighed and said "does that include burgers and fries?"
"No, fatty, I mean dont eat anything!" Replied the doctor

A man walks into a library

A man goes to a library, walks to the librarian's desk and says:
"I'd like to have a large burger with french fries and a coke please!!"
Surprised the Librarian says: "But sir, this is a library."
"Oh, I'm sorry", says the man and he whispers:
*"I'd like to have a large burger with french fries and a coke please.."*

So after my recent checkup, my doctor told me not to eat anything fatty

Me: You mean like burgers and fries right?
Doctor: No, don't eat anything, Fatty.

What's the difference between In-n-Out Burger french fries and League of Legends?

I can control my salt intake at In-n-out.

A 10-point buck walked into a lodge restaurant and ordered a burger and fries.
After the deer finished and was paying, the cashier said, "We don't see too many deer around here."
"At these prices," replied the buck, "I'm not surprised."

A blonde walks into a library and asks the librarian, "Can I have a burger and fries?"
She replies, "Sorry, this is a library."
The blonde whispers, "Oh, sorry. May I have a burger and fries?"

One day a blonde went into the library and asked the librarian, "Can I have a burger and fries?" The librarian replied, "This is the library." Then blonde whispered, "Oh. Can I have a burger and fries?"

j**... is that you?

said Tom.
j**... - "Oh my god, Tom! I haven't seen you since college!"
Tom - "Yea it's been a while, how are things?"
j**... - "Not bad, I think I've done pretty well for myself. I ended up finishing that Bachelor's of Fine Arts and spend my time painting. I love it, wouldn't give it up for the world! How bout you? You end up finishing your degree?"
Tom - "Yep, Software Engineering. I make a pretty comfortable living and it's rewarding work. I can't believe it, it's been so long. It was great catching up with you."
j**... - "It was, it was. Just one last question."
Tom - "Shoot."
j**... - "Would you like fries or onion rings with your burger?"
Tom - "Fries."

A blonde decided to order food using the drive-thru

She ordered a burger, fries, and car insurance.


If potatoes are french fries and cows are burgers. What is the radius of the sun.

A goose walks into a cafe.

He says, "I want a burger, fries, and coke.
Put it on my bill."