Bulb Jokes

Following is our collection of illumination humor and fam one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. They include Bulb puns for adults, dirty lamp jokes or clean light bulb gags for kids.

There is an abundance of lightbulb jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 64 funniest jokes on bulb. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any blub witze you can hear about bulb.

The Best jokes about Bulb

How many Brexiteers does it take to change a light bulb?


One to promise a brighter future and the rest to screw it up.

How many introverts does it take to change a light bulb?

Why must it be a group activity?

How many grammar Nazis does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Too

How many D&D players does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them. Never split the party.

How many optometrist does it take to screw in a light bulb?

1... or 2?? Or 1? Or 2?


How many Germans do you need to change a light bulb?

One. Because we are efficient and not very funny.

How many "friend zoned" guys does it take to change a lightbulb?

How many "friend zoned" guys does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just compliment it and get mad when it won't screw.

How many Germans does it take to change a light bulb?

One. We are efficient and dont have humour.

How many super saiyans does it take to change a light bulb?

Find out next time, on Dragon Ball Z!

How many dyslexics does it change to take a light bulb?

How many divorced men does it take to change a light bulb?

No one knows. They never get to keep the house.


How many fuq bois does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None it's always lit fam

How many tumblrinas does it take to change a lightbulb?

You may think that a burnt out bulb needs to change just because the room is too dark *for you* to see anything, so it *must* be changed, but I don't care, it's beautiful, you should respect its right to be burnt out and learn to be more accepting of darker rooms, check your filament privileges you ableist scum. Anyone who disagrees with this is a burnt-out-bulbophobe and a darknessphobe. Thanks for being so understanding.

How many Saiyans does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one... But it takes 4 episodes and Krillin dies...

How do feminists screw in a lightbulb?

By holding the bulb up to the socket and waiting for the world to revolve around them

How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

That's not funny

How many dead hookers does it take to change a light bulb?

Apparently not three. It's still dark in my basement.

How many Americans does it take to change a light bulb?

Just kidding, you can't change anything in the United States.

How many Freudians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two.

One to screw in the bulb and the other to hold the penis..*ER..LADDER! I MEANT LADDER!*


How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two. One to beat the room for being black and one to arrest the bulb for being broke.

What not to put in one's mouth

One day, the teacher asked the children in class to give examples of what was not good to put in one's mouth.

Little Johnny says, It is not good to put a lit light bulb in one's mouth.

The teacher says, That is correct, but why?

Little Johnny answers, I don't know, but my mom always tells my dad, 'Turn off the light before you put it in my mouth!'

How many prepubescent teen boys does it take to screw in a light bulb?

He said "screw" lolol

How many Congressmen does it take to change a light bulb?

Better buy a flashlight

How many conspiracy theorists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

We may never know the truth.

How many ladybugs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, but don't ask me how they got in there.

How many Black Lives Matters protesters does it take to change a light bulb?

Don't be silly, Black Lives Matters protesters can't change anything.

How many vegans does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to screw in the light bulb and one to tell you they are vegans.
.......
Well apparently the correct answer is three. The extra one is needed to post whiny replies when they all get triggered by this joke.

How many dead hookers do you need to change a light bulb?

Dunno. Seven's not the answer though, my basement is still dark

How many Psychologists does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one. But the light bulb has to want to change.

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Feminists don't change anything.

How many LAPD officers does it take to change a lightbulb?

None. They shoot the room for being black and beat up the bulb for being broke.

How many Irishmen does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. One to hold the bulb and one to drink until the room spins.

How many bros does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They prefer Natural Light.

How many IT people does it take to change a light bulb?

Do you have a ticket for that?

How many mods does it take to screw in a light bulb?

\[removed\]

How many optometrists does it take to change a light bulb?

One, or two? Three, or four?

How many dead hookers does it take to change a light bulb?

I don't know yet. My Basement is still dark.

How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb?

5.

1 to change the bulb and 4 to shoot the room up for being black

SRS bait.

How many feminists does to take to screw in a lightbulb?

Only one. She stands with the bulb and the world revolves around her.

How many cancer patients does it take to change a light bulb?

1 and 12 people to say how inspiring it was

How many graphic designers does it take to change a light bulb?

Does it have to be a light bulb? 'Cause I had this other idea...

How many dead babies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Definitely not 9, my basement is still dark

How many Yale students does it take to change a lightbulb?

*One to hold the bulb up to the socket and wait for the world to revolve around them, three to scream at the circuit breaker and belittle it for controlling power, and eight others to console the first four while they tweet about how problematic this traumatic experience has been for everyone.*

How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, but I have no clue how they got in there.

How many people with OCD does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. It *has* to be seven.

How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Thats what grad students are for

How many gay men does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One, but it takes an entire emergency room to get it out.

How man nihilists does it take to change a light bulb?

It doesn't matter.

How many immature people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

69.

How many Dragon Ball Z characters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one, but it will take three episodes.

How many developers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. That's a hardware problem.

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

The fact that you think that it's not society, but the light bulb that should change is problematic.

How many PETA memebers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. PETA can't change anything.

How many narcissists does it take to change a light bulb?

One. They just hold the bulb in place and the world revolves around them.

How many cops does it need to change a broken light bulb?

No idea, but they beat up the room for being black and the bulb for being broke

How many dead hookers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

I don't know, but it's not five, because my basement is still dark.

How many U.S. Presidents does it take to change a light bulb?

Forty-five. A couple dozen to turn it to the right, a score of them to turn it to the left, and one to really, really screw it at the end.

How many introverts does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Why does everything have to be a group activity?

How many protesters does it take to change a light bulb?

Trick question. Protesters never change anything.

Two.

How many psychics does it take to change a light bulb?

How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Wanna go for a bike ride?

How many Germans does it take to change a light bulb?

None. German light bulbs are quality products.

How many ADHD kids does it take to change a light bulb?

LETS GO RIDE BIKES

How many abducted women does it take to change a light bulb?

Five is apparently not enough because my basement is still dark.

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

Joko Jokes