bruno Jokes

funny pick up lines and hilarious bruno puns

If Bruno Mars married Venus Williams on Earth, do you think they'd have a Sun?

Only if they planet.


Why isn't Bruno Mars named Bruno Snickers?

Because he doesn't have the nuts.


Bruno Mars, Venus Williams and Freddie Mercury walk into a bar

But they didn't planet that way


Big Pause

A bear walks into a tavern and sits at the bar.

The bartender says, "What can I get'cha there, Bruno?"

The bear says, "I'll have a rum and..."

He's silent for 30 seconds, then adds, "Coke."

The bartender says "OK. But what's with the big pause?"

The bear lifts his front feet to his face, looks at them, and says "I've had them all my life. Ya got a problem with that, buddy?'


I heard that Bruno Mars helped design the Apple Watch

Dont believe me? Just watch


I'm cursed to end every statement I make with Bruno Mars lyrics

Don't believe me? Just watch.


Bruno Mars is the best levitating vegetable magician I've ever seen.

He can do 24 Carrot Magic in the Air


I want to be half as cool as Bruno Mars...

I'd be just fine with 12K Magic


The Boy In The Striped Pyjamas (Spoilers)

Near the end of the book I think Bruno felt pretty gassed.


Have you heard the new Bruno Mars song?

It's pure gold, truly magical.


As a man I'm not jealous of Bruno Mars.

Women fuck him because he's over six figures and famous.

Women fuck me because I'm over 6 feet tall and over 6 inches.


Bruno Mars may be drippin' in finesse....

But at 5' 5" it only takes a teaspoon to soak him.


Did Bruno Mars ever get a purple heart?

Cuz he caught a grenade for you


What do rabbits eat when listening to Bruno Mars?

24 Carrots


Why we don't call Bruno Mars "Bruno Snickers?"

because he hasn't nuts.


how tall is bruno mars?


What do you call Bruno Mars?

Michael Jackson the third.


How does Bruno mars ask for popcorn at the theater?

Go pop it for a player, pop-pop it for me


Do you know why Bruno Mars is called Bruno Mars and not Bruno Snickers?

Its cause he ain't got no nuts


What are the most funny Bruno jokes of all time ?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking with someone about Bruno? Well, here are the best Bruno dad jokes to laugh out loud. Crazy funny puns and Bruno pick up lines to share with friends.


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