Brunette Hair Jokes
31 brunette hair jokes and hilarious brunette hair puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about brunette hair that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Brunette Hair Short Jokes
Short brunette hair jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The brunette hair humour may include short brunette jokes also.
- If a woman likes you, you can tell her real hair colour from how it feels. Blondes touch you hard, brunettes touch you fast, redheads touch you... Gingerly
- How can you tell when a brunette is actually a blonde who dyes her hair? When she trips over the cordless phone.
- Why do brunettes color their hair blonde? So people will say "look at that blonde girl!", instead of "look at that fat girl!".
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Brunette Hair One Liners
Which brunette hair one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with brunette hair? I can suggest the ones about brunette girl and blond hair.
- What do you call a blonde who dyes her hair brunette? Artificial intelligence
* - How it is called when a blonde dyes her hair as brunette? Artificial intelligence
- What do you call it when a brunette dyes her hair blonde? Brainwashing.
- Why are Brunettes so proud of their hair color? Because it matches their mustaches.
Brunette Hair Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about brunette hair you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean blonde hair jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make brunette hair pranks.
So there's this magical mountain...
...where people jump off, and land in a pool of whatever they yell. There are three chicks, a brown-haired girl, and brunette, and a blonde. The brown-haired girl jumps, and yells "CANDY!", and lands in a huge pool of candy. The brunette jumps off and yells "MONEY!", and lands in a pool of money. The blonde jumps and yells "CANNONBALL!".
A blonde is sitting next to a brunette on a plane. She turns to the dark haired woman and asks, "Where are you from?"
The brunette haughtily replies, "I'm from a place where we know better than to end a sentence with a preposition."
The blonde pauses for a second and then asks, "Where are you from, b**...?"
Three moms are talking and having lunch together...
One mom had black hair, the next was brunette, and the third was blonde.
The black haired mom says "You guys won't believe what I found in my daughters room yesterday. A cigarette! I've never even smoked."
The brunette mom says "You won't believe what I found in *my* daughters room yesterday. Whiskey! I've never even drank."
The blonde mom says "Well guess what I found in *my* daughters room yesterday. A c**...! I've never even had s**... before."
A brunette, a red-haired and a blonde comes to an edge of a hill.
The rule is: if you lie, you fall off the hill.
A brunette says: - I think I'm the most beautiful... And she falls off the hill.
A red-haired says: - I think I'm the most clever... And she falls off the hill.
A blonde says: I think... And she falls off the hill.
A blonde, a brunette, and a black-haired girl are walking down their high school hallway
when they come across a genie's lamp. The black-haired girl rubs it, and a genie comes out. He tells them that he'll give each of them three wishes if they say something true about themselves. If not, they'll go "p**...", and die.
So the black-haired girl squeals, "I think I'm the prettiest girl in school!"
\*p**...\*
The brunette pipes up, "I think I'm one of the smartest girls in school."
\*p**...\*
And then the blond says, "I think--" \*p**...\*
Makes you think
One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head.
She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, 'Why are some of your hairs white, Mum?'
Her mother replied, 'Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white.'
The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, 'Mummy, how come ALL of grandma's hairs are white?'
A blonde walks into a shop and asks the worker how much for this tv?
The worker replies sorry we don't sell to blondes.
So she leaves, goes home and dyes her hair, and comes back to the store a brunette. She then asks the worker again how much for this tv?
He again replies with sorry, we don't sell to blondes.
So she goes home yet again, dyes her hair red, and walks back to the store and asks how much for this tv?
The worker responds yet again with sorry, we don't sell to blondes
The woman, in anger replies with HOW CAN YOU TELL IM A BLONDE??!!
The man calmly states that's not a tv, it's a microwave.
A blonde girl...
...wants to know what life is like as a brunette girl, so she goes to the hairdresser and has her hair died brown.
Eager to show the world her newly acquired intelligence, she goes on a walk and meets a shepherd. She walks towards him and says:
"if i can guess how many sheep you have in your pack, can I have one?"
"fair deal" the shepherd says and the blonde guesses "457". The shepherd, really surprised about the ability of the girl, says "a deal is a deal, you guessed the right number, pick a sheep and you can keep it".
After the girl has picked her favourite of the pack, the shepherd says:
"if i can guess, which colour your hair had before you dyed it brown, can i get my dog back?"
Three blondes were stuck on an island
Three blonde women are stuck on an island. Together, they find a genie lamp and give it a rub. Sure enough, out comes the genie, who offers each of them one wish.
The first blonde woman says, "I wish I was smarter." The genie turns her into a brunette, and she swims off the island.
The next blonde woman thinks for a minute and tells the genie, "I wish you made me even smarter than you made her." The genie turns her into a black haired woman, and she builds a boat and sails off the island.
The third blonde woman says, "I wish you made me smarter than both of them!" The genie then turns her into a man, and she takes the bridge off of the island.
A guy walks into a hospital and sees a really attractive female with brunette hair sitting down.
And sits right next to her to make conversation.
Guy:Hi, What are you here for?
Girl:I am donating blood.
Guy:How much are they giving you for your blood?
Girl:$50 for a pint, what about you? why are you here?
Guy:Oh, I am donating s**....
Girl: Cool, how much are they giving you?
Guy:$300
Girl:Wow *surprised/shocked face*
Then the two go there separate ways. The next day the female walks into the hospital and sits next to the same guy she met yesterday and the guy says "Are you donating blood?"
And the girl whose mouth cheeks are puffed up shakes her head no
A joke I heard from a regular customer.
Brunette goes to the doctor
A brunette goes into a doctor's office and says that her body hurts wherever she touches it.
"Impossible," says the doctor. "Show me."
She takes her finger, presses on her elbow, and screams in agony. She pushes her knee and screams, pushes her ankle and screams, and so it goes on; everywhere she touches makes her scream with pain.
The doctor says, "You're not really a brunette are you?" She says, "No, I dyed my hair. I'm naturally blonde." "I thought so," he says. "Your finger is broken."
A dumb blonde was really tired
A dumb blonde was really tired of being made fun of, so she decided to dye her hair and look like a brunette. When she had brown hair, she decided to take a drive in the country.
After she had been driving for a while, she saw a farmer and a flock of sheep and thought, "Oh! Those sheep are so adorable!"
She got out and walked over to the farmer and said, "If I can guess how many sheep you have, can I take one home?"
The farmer, being a bit of a gambler himself, said she could have a try.
The blonde looked at the flock and guessed, "157."
The farmer was amazed - she was right! So the blonde, (who looked like a brunette), picked one out and got back into her car. Before she left, the farmer walked up to her and said.
"If I can guess the real color of your hair, can I have my dog back?"
Free shoes
A very beautiful brunette with long hair, long legs and a petite figure decided to go shopping for shoes. Her friends warned her that the old, lonely man who worked at the shoe-store would try to look up her skirt to see her p**....
She really wanted a pair of shoes but was dismayed that the shoe salesman would try to look at her p**.... She thought for a while, and then went shoe shopping.
She found the perfect pair of shoes, and the shoe salesman gave them to her for free, saying it was the least he could do.
Her friends were all jealous that she got the shoes for free. They asked her, did he try to look up your skirt to see your p**...? She said yes, but I outsmarted him. When her friends asked how she had outsmarted him she said, I didn't wear any p**..., so he couldn't see them even if he wanted to.
A brunette, a farmer and a sheep...
On her day off work, a young brunette decided to take her new convertible car for a drive through a farming community.
After an hour of driving she had to stop while a farmer shepherded his sheep across the road.
The brunette realises a rare opportunity and asks the farmer
"if I can guess how many sheep you have, can I have one?"
"Sure" replies the farmer after thinking a bit, "that wouldn't be easy"
"326" the girl says out of nowhere..
"Correct!" said the stunned farmer and never the less gives her a sheep.
The brunette is extatic by her efforts, but just before she pulls away the farmer stops her and asks
"How about another deal? If I can guess what color your hair was before you dyed it brunette, can I have my dog back?"
Women on death row
Three women, a red head, a brunette, and a blonde are on death row for unspeakable crimes. Instead of the electric chair, they are to be shot by a squad of soldiers. The red haired girl is first, but she has an idea. The commander starts the count down: 3...2..1... The girl yells: "Earthquake!" Everyone is startled and confused and she escapes. Up next is the brunette. She catches on the idea as well. The countdown starts again: 3..2...1... She yells: "tornado!!" Like the girl before her, she also escapes during the confusion. Finally it's the blonde's turn. She too has figured out the trick. Again the countdown starts: 3..2...1..
She yells: "Fire!!"
A man goes to the beach...
...while he's walking down the shore he sees a 20-year old, blonde-haired girl sitting in the sand crying. Concerned, the man runs over to her. "What's wrong?" He asks.
"I'm twenty years old and I've never been hugged by someone other than family!" She starts sobbing.
Feeling bad, the man hugs her. "There, now you've been hugged." And walks on.
The next day the man walks on the beach again and sees another girl, this one with black hair, sitting in here chair bawling. "What's wrong?" He asks her.
"I'm 19 and I've never been kissed before!" She whines.
He gives her a small kiss on the lips. "There, now you've been kissed." And he walks on.
The third day of his vacation he sees a brunette, openly crying like the other two women. He sighs. "What's wrong?"
"I'm 18 and I've never been s**... before!"
He picks her up, looks her in the eyes, and tosses her out into the ocean, where sharks surround her.
"There. Now you're s**...."
Carpet matches the curtains
10 year olds Andy, Ben, and Chuck are having lunch at school on Monday morning and Andy says, "My Pa said that Mrs. Jones carpet doesn't match the curtains. What does that mean?"
Ben informs him that it is when a lady's p**... hair doesn't match the hair on her head.
Chuck proposes that they see if their respective teachers, Mrs Adams, Ms Brown, and Mrs Carter have matching carpet and curtains.
The boys spend the week trying to peek up their teachers' skirts. They meet up at lunch on Friday to discuss their discoveries.
Andy says, "It's a scandal: Mrs Adams bleaches her hair blonde, she's actually a brunette."
Ben says, "It's so crazy: Ms Brown dyes her hair red, she's actually a blonde."
Chuck says, "That's nothing: Mrs Carter wears a wig!"
A dumb blonde was really tired of being made fun of, so she decided to have her hair she would look like a brunette.
When she had brown hair, she decided to take a drive in the country.
After she had been driving for a while, she saw a farmer and a flock of sheep and thought, "Oh! Those sheep are so adorable!"
She got out and walked over to the farmer and said, "If I can guess how many sheep you have, can I take one home?"
The farmer, being a bit of a gambler himself, said she could have a try.
The blonde looked at the flock and guessed, "157."
The farmer was amazed - she was right!
So the blonde, (who looked like a brunette), picked one out and got back into her car.
Before she left, farmer walked up to her and said.
"If I can guess the real color of your hair, can I have my dog back?"
Three men are all working on building a house.
They go up to the roof for lunch, and unwrapped their sandwiches. The Brunette says "if I get one more Tuna sandwich, I'm going to jump off this roof and kill myself. The black haired one says "if I get one more pickle and lettuce sandwich, I, too, am going to jump off this roof and kill myself. The blonde looks at his sandwich and also declares, "if I get one more peanut butter and jelly sandwich, I'm going to jump off this roof and kill myself." The next day, they all get the same sandwiches and kill themselves. That night, their wives all meet up and mourn. "If I had known that my husband was going to kill himself over a sandwich, I wouldn't have given it to him." The brunette cries. "Same," the raven head replies. They both look at the blonde. "Don't look at me, he packed his own lunch!"
Three men are all working on building a house.
They go up to the roof for lunch, and unwrapped their sandwiches. The Brunette says "if I get one more Tuna sandwich, I'm going to jump off this roof and kill myself. The black haired one says "if I get one more pickle and lettuce sandwich, I, too, am going to jump off this roof and kill myself. The blonde looks at his sandwich and also declares, "if I get one more peanut butter and jelly sandwich, I'm going to jump off this roof and kill myself." The next day, they all get the same sandwiches and kill themselves. That night, their wives all meet up and mourn. "If I had known that my husband was going to kill himself over a sandwich, I wouldn't have given it to him." The brunette cries. "Same," the raven head replies. They both look at the blonde. "Don't look at me, he packed his own lunch!"