Bruce Willis Jokes
66 bruce willis jokes and hilarious bruce willis puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about bruce willis that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Bruce Willis Short Jokes
Short bruce willis jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The bruce willis humour may include short bruce wayne jokes also.
- My wife said she would leave me if I don't stop comparing everything to Bruce Willis movies, but you know what they say about old habits... They Pulp Fiction.
- Apparently Bruce Willis is only going to concentrate on action films from now on... because you know what they say about old habits...
- Of course Bruce Willis is going to keep playing the same roles. You know what they say about old habits.
- Bruce Willis was offered a role in the new Star Wars film, but turned it down to concentrate on action films Because you know what they say about old habits...
- I have an addiction to making references to random Bruce Willis movie titles. People have tried to help me stop but you know what they say. Old habits... Pulp Fiction
- Bruce Willis will probably keep making action movies forever. You know what they say about old habits.
- Did you hear about the guy who watched that new Bruce Willis film five times in a row? He was a Die Hard fan.
- My wife got mad at me for my long-term addiction to watching Bruce Willis movies. I told her old habits die hard
- I'm a huge fan of ALL of Bruce Willis's work. I've seen every movie he's in. I guess you can say.. I'm a Die Hard fan.
- Bruce Willis has been cast to play the lead role in the upcoming Lord of the Rings sequel. Old Hobbits Die Hard.
Share These Bruce Willis Jokes With Friends
Bruce Willis One Liners
Which bruce willis one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with bruce willis? I can suggest the ones about bruce lee and bruce caitlyn.
- Why did Bruce Willis die with a smile on his face? Because he died hard.
- How much tax does Bruce Willis pay on a dollar? Six cents.
- Why does Bruce Willis keep making action movies? Because his old habits, die hard.
- What did Bruce Willis find in the freezer at the morgue? [OC] Icy dead people!
- I'm a die hard Bruce Willis fan.
- What title would a hurricane movie with Bruce Willis have? Irmageddon.
- What do you call Bruce Willis on his best behaviour? Good habits die hard
- Why wasn't Bruce Willis cast in Titanic? Because he would've saved everyone
- What did Bruce Willis say to the waiter once his family was done eating Bruce Billus
- Why Bruce Willis didn't star in the Titanic? Cuz he would have saved her
- Why didn't Bruce Willis star in the movie "Titanic"? Because he would've saved everybody.
- Bruce Willis found dead.... ....bored with acting
- What's Bruce Willis' favourite chemical compound? Sodium Diehardonate.
- A new remake of Titanic features Bruce Willis. Bruce saves everyone.
- Bruce Willis died having s**.... He died hard.
Ridiculous Bruce Willis Jokes to Spark Fun and Laughter
What funny jokes about bruce willis you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean bruce name jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make bruce willis pranks.
Steven Spielberg was busy discussing his new action adventure about famous classical composers.
Bruce Willis, Sylvester Stallone and Arnold Schwarzenegger were in the room.
"Who do you want to play?" Spielberg asked Bruce Willis.
"I've always been a big fan of Chopin," said Bruce.
"I'll play him."
"And you, Sylvester?" asked Spielberg.
"Mozart's the one for me!" said Sly.
"And what about you?" Spielberg asked Arnold Schwarzenegger.
"I'll be Bach," said Arnie.
BREAKING NEWS: Bruce Willis had a fatal heart attack while he was having s**......
He is said to have died hard
Bruce Willis, arnold schwarzenegger and Sylvester Stallone are planning a costume party
and the theme is composers. Bruce tells the other stars, "I'll dress up as Mozart". Sylvester responds, "I'd be a great Beethoven". As the two are planning their costumes, Arnold checks the time and notices he's late for an appointment. As he hurries out the door, Bruce and Stallone ask "Hey, Arnold, who'll you dress up as? Arnold responds, as he walks out of the room, "I'll be Bach".
Did you hear that Bruce Willis is going to star in a movie where he goes undercover as an elderly nun?
It's called Old Habits Die Hard
Why did the nun refuse to stop donating clothes or watching Bruce Willis movies?
Old habits die hard.
I used to watch lots of Bruce Willis movies, but now I don't.
I guess old habits Die Hard.
^Someone ^please ^slap ^me.
^
A New Movie - Stephen Spielberg
Stephen Speilberg has just recently decided to create a new action movie about the greatest composers on Earth. His creates his cast and asks them 'Who do you want to be' ...
Bruce Willis says to him 'I ll play Beethoven, i've always fancied myself as a bit of a genius'
Liam Neeson then pipes up saying 'Im going to be Mozart, i find his music very relaxing and very baroque'
Lastly Arnold Schwarzenegger says 'Ill be Bach'
Bruce Willis...
Bruce Willis will probably keep making action movies. Because, you know what they say about old habits...
I got a new spoiler on my car.
Just a long sticker that says "Bruce Willis was a ghost the whole time!"
Have you heard about Bruce Willis' new movie in which he has to infiltrate a Nunnery?
"Bad Habits Die Hard."
I really love Bruce Willis. I have all of his movies, hundreds of posters, and multiple autographs
You might say that I'm a die-hard fan
I once met Bruce Willis
I once met Bruce Willis at a fancy dress party. He was wearing a really shabby looking nun outfit. I was told that he'd worn the same costume to every fancy dress party he'd attended for years. I suppose old habits die hard.
Bruce Willis sure does like to be in action movies
I guess what they say about old habits is true.
Who should have played Bilbo?
Who should have played Bilbo Baggins in Lord of the Rings? Bruce Willis. Because old hobbits die hard.
Bruce Willis, Chuck Norris and Arnold Schwarzenegger are all auditioning for a film about composers...
Bruce Willis says "I'll be Mozart", Chuck Norris says "I'll be Beethoven" and Arnold Schwarzenegger says "I'll be Bach".
My father has always been obsessed with Bruce Willis movies ...
I guess he was a die-hard fan ...
Bruce Willis and Liam Neeson have signed up to do a movie together
It's called 'Taken Hard'
What does Bruce Willis say when he finds the zip ties?
Zippy tie-yay motherf***er.
News has leaked of the title of Bruce Willis' next film, where he wears a nun's outfit he bought from a charity shop.
Old habits die hard.
Arnold Schwarzenegger, Tom Cruise, and Bruce Willis said they wanted to star in a movie about classical musicians.
Bruce Willis said I'll play Mozart!
Tom Cruise said I'll play Beethoven!
Arnold said I'll be Bach
Hollywood Halloween
Bruce Willis and Sylvester Stallone were discussing their next Halloween costumes. They wanted to get away from the typical scary characters and do something different.
Bruce: 'how about historical figures? I'll go as Freud.'
Sly: 'ok, sounds good. I'll go as Leonardo Da Vinci.'
Arnold Schwarzenegger overhears their discussion, walks over and replies 'I'll be Bach.'
It turns out Fire! isn't the worst thing you can yell out in a crowded movie theater.
It's Bruce Willis is dead!
If Bruce Willis were to pass away with an e**...
He would die hard
Did you know that Bruce Willis has owned more than 100 Hondas?
His favourite was the fifth Element.
(Sorry if you've seen this before, my friend told it to me)
I wish I could stop quoting Bruce Willis movies.
I guess that old habits... pulp fiction.
Sylvester Stallone, Bruce Willis and Arnold Schwarzenegger were discussing who they were going to play in the new Hollywood Blockbuster:
The Great Composers!
"I wanna be Beethoven," said Stallone.
"I gotta be Mozart," retorted Willis.
"What about you, Arnie?" they asked....
Did you hear about the new Bruce Willis movie?
Bruce Willis has to go undercover in a retirement home for nuns to stop a t**... plot.
It's called "Old Habits Die Hard".
What does Bruce Willis, a donkey with sunglasses on, and my ex have in common?
They're all bad a**....
Sylvester Stallone, Bruce Willis and Arnold Schwarzenegger are talking about making a new film together.
Sly: I wanna show the world that we're more than just action movie stars. I wanna make a movie about classical music and classical composers. I know you guys love that stuff too. What do you think? Will you help me make a movie about it and show the world how cultured we are?
Bruce: I could play Beethoven. I've always wanted to play a tortured genius
Sly: You would be great. And I'll be Tchaikovsky. What about you Arnie?
Arnie: I'll be Bach
