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Brown Eyed Jokes

44 brown eyed jokes and hilarious brown eyed puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about brown eyed that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Brown Eyed Short Jokes

Short brown eyed jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The brown eyed humour may include short brown eye jokes also.

  1. I call my wife Bambi. She thinks it's because she's cute with big brown eyes... But in reality it's because I want someone to shoot her mother with a hunting rifle
  2. I call my wife Bambi and she thinks it's because she's cute with big brown eyes... Actually, it's because I shot her mother with a hunting rifle...
  3. I call my wife Bambi, she thinks it's because she is cute with big brown eyes. But in reality I just hope someone shoots her mother with a hunting rifle.
  4. I call my wife Bambi. She thinks it's because she is so cute, with big brown eyes. Actually, it's because I would like someone to shoot her mother, with a hunting rifle.
  5. Any loving's good loving, so I took what I could get. Then she looked at me with those big brown eyes and said Woof.
  6. The Cleveland Browns visited an orphanage last week after their loss. "It was so sad to see all the pain and hurt in their eyes." Said Katie, age 7.
  7. My dog just died... I'll never forget her beautiful brown eyes, and her tongue that never quit.
  8. Today I found Jesus in my life. Let me tell you about him. He is tan with a thick black mustache, and eyes so brown they make your soul melt. He is my gardner, the best I have ever employed.
  9. Where are you only allowed to swim if you have red hair, brown eyes, are wearing blue shorts, have a big brother, are 28 years old and your favourite movie is The Shining? The Specific Ocean
  10. His Hair is red, His eyes are Brown He is never gonna give you up. He is never gonna let you down.

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Brown Eyed One Liners

Which brown eyed one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with brown eyed? I can suggest the ones about blue eyed and brown headed.

  1. What do you get when you cross a blue eye and a brown eye? Pink eye
  2. How Do You Get Pink Eye? Scrub Your Brown Eye
  3. You can dedicate Brown Eyed Girl to any woman They all have at least one brown eye.
  4. I don't know why people think Rihanna has a black eye. Looks Brown to me.
  5. What color eyes do you get when you mix brown eyes with green eyes? Pink eyes
  6. What do you say to a woman with 2 black eyes? How was your date with Chris Brown.
  7. What do you ask a woman who has two black eyes? When did you meet Chris Brown?!

The Funniest Brown Eyed Jokes for a Bone-Shaking Laugh

What funny jokes about brown eyed you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean blue eyes jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make brown eyed pranks.

Mr. Smith, the biology instructor at a Highschool, said during class, “Miss Jones, would you please name the o**... of the human body, which under the appropriate conditions, expands to six times its normal size, and define the conditions.”
Miss Jones gasped, then said, “Mr. Smith, I do not think that is a proper question to ask me. I assure you my parents will hear of this.” With that she sat down red-faced.
Unperturbed, Mr. Smith called on Miss Brown and asked the same question. Miss Brown, replied, “The pupil of the eye, in dim light.”
“Correct,” said Mr. Smith. “And now, Miss Jones, I have three things to say to you. One, you have not studied your lesson. Two, you have a dirty mind. And three, you will some day be faced with a dreadful disappointment."

So a seal walks into a pub...

And bellies up to the bar. The bartender looks him up and down, and asks,
"What can I get for you?" The seal looks up at the bartender with his big, brown, sealy eyes and says,
"Anything but a Canadian Club."

So there's this blonde...

and she's sick and tired of being stereotyped as the dumb blonde, so she decides to dye her hair and move to another city. After she died her hair brown, she packs up her things and leaves for the new city. Driving down a barren country road on the way there, she starts to get really hungry. With no restaurants in sight, she pulls in to the only home as far as the eye can see, a sheep farm. Thinking a sheep would make a tasty meal, she walks up to the house where the farmer is sitting on the front porch and asks him if she can guess how many sheep there are if she can have one. The farmer agrees. The woman has a knack for counting and adds up all the sheep really quickly and says "72". The farmer says "whelp, that's right, go grab your sheep and leave." The woman picks up her choice and starts walking back to her car, but before she gets in the farmer shouts after her "If I can guess your real hair color, can I have my dog back?"

So, a middle school science class is learning about genetics

and the students are working with recessive and dominant eye colors in punnett squares. A few minutes into the activity one student beckons the teacher over. He has a very concerned look on his face.
The teacher is a little worried. This has happened before. Every once in a while a student realizes that he is adopted or his dad isn't who he thought.
The teacher hesitantly walks over to the concerned student, ready to have a difficult conversation.
"Do you have a question about the assignment?" the teacher asks.
"Well," the student replies, "I think I might be adopted, because I have blue eyes and both my moms have brown eyes!"
[According to a Special Ed teacher at my school, this really happened to her.]

Maybe we gave Chris Brown too tough a time over Rihanna

In his eyes, he may have just beat her white and gold.

First Date

Years back, before electronic car door locks, there were two brothers, Andy and Oby. Andy was 4 years older than 16 year old Oby. Oby had never been on a date and wanted to take out a girl he had met. So...he asked Andy for advice. "I want to take this girl out for a walk and I just don't know what to do or say" Andy told him "It's easy. Just compliment her and everything will fall into place". "What do you mean" asked Oby. Andy told him to compliment her on her hair "your hair is like silk", her teeth "your teeth are like pearls", her eyes "your eyes are like sapphires", etc.
So Oby take her for a walk, and comes home with a black eye. Andy asked him what happened. Oby says: "Well, I tried to compliment her on her hair, but she didn't have much, and not many teeth either. Her eyes were one blue and one brown like some dogs, and I didn't know what to say about that, so...I said for a fat girl you sure don't sweat much!"

Peter is different

A couple have 13 children, 12 of them are blonde and have blue eyes, 1 has black hair and brown eyes, his name is Peter. One day the wife of the couple is dying of illness, her husband is sitting on her bed. The husband says "Our Peter is different from the other kids, does he have a different father?" His wife says yes. And, the man says, "Then, who is his dad?" Upon which his wife says, "You".

The sky was blue, the moon was high, we were together, just her and I...

The sky was blue, the moon was high, we were together, just her and I.
Her hair was brown, her eyes baby blue, I knew exactly what she wanted to do.
And so, with courage, I did my best and laid my hand upon her breast.
Her face was light, her body fine, I ran my finger down her spine.
I trembled in shock, I felt her heart, slowly she spread her legs apart.
I knew she was ready... but I didn't know how, for this was my first experience at milking a cow.

Back in the pioneer days...

A couple traveling west saw an old Native American man with his ear pressed to the ground, unmoving. As they approached, the man's eyes slowly opened and he said:
"Large wagon train. Fifty wagons. Lead cart has team of five horses. Half wagons covered, half not. Cart in middle have chip in wheel. Last wagon have team of three. One brown, one black, one tan. Tan horse have cropped tail."
The pioneers, shocked, said, "That's amazing! You can hear all that just by putting your ear to the ground?"
The old brave replied, "No. Ran over me half hour ago..."

When does brown and white make pink?

When the brown eye mixes with the white eye, you get pink eye!

A guy walks into an eletronics store

Employee: *Hello Sir, how may I be of assistance*
Guy: *My dishwasher just died on me, I was wondering if I could get a similar one*
Employee: *Sure thing Sir, what was the make and model?*
Guy: *Fat, Brown Hair, Brown Eyed Virgo with an annoying mother*

The sky was dark, the moon was high, we were together, just her and I.

The sky was dark, the moon was high, we were together, just her and I.
Her hair was brown, her eyes were blue, I knew just what, she wanted to do.
So with my hand, I did my best, I ran my hand across her chest.
Her body was good, her hair was fine, I ran my hand across her spine, I felt a shock, I felt her heart, slowly she spread her legs apart,
I knew she was ready, but I didn't know how, for this was my first time milking a cow.
(A poem by u/loman23.)

The presidents of the United States by eye color: Blue eye - 26 presidents. Gray eyes-6 presidents. Brown eyes-4 presidents. Hazel eyes-2 presidents.

And 1 black eye.

The first time Chris Brown ever laid his eyes on Rihanna he knew that he would someday hit that

I call my wife Bambi...

She thinks it's because of her big brown eyes.
Nope.
It is because I'd like her mother shot.

Man on his death bed

A man is on his death bed looking at his family wich contains of a wife, 2 older boys with bright red hair and freckles, and 1 younger boy with dark brown hair and blue eyes.
He asks his boys to go out of the room so he can ask his wife something. Sweetheart tell me before I die, is our youngest child really mine? She said yes and he took his last breath and passed away.
The newly widowed woman said under her breath Thank god he didn't ask about the other two

Poor daddy

A husband and wife have four sons. The oldest three are tall with red hair and light skin while the youngest son is short with black hair and brown eyes.
The father was on his deathbed when he turned to his wife and said Honey, before I die, be totally honest with me: Is our youngest son truly my child?
The wife replied, I swear on everything holy that he is your son. With that, the husband passed away. The wife muttered Thank goodness he didn't ask about the other three.

A couple has 4 sons

The first three were tall with straight brown hair and brown eyes, but their youngest son was short with curly blond hair and blue eyes. When the husband was on his deathbed, he called his wife over and asked, "Is that 4th son mine?"
His wife said, "I swear, on all things holy, that child is yours."
The husband died a few moments later. She said to herself, "Thank God he didn't ask about the other three."

A man said "My wife and I know everything about each other! We have the perfect relationship!"

His co-worker then replied "Well, what are the color of her eyes?"
The man, who never paid attention to his wifes eye colour, after work went home to see the colour of this wifes eyes.
Upon entering his bedroom, he saw his wife sitting on the bed, staring at him with her eyes wide open.
He smiled and said "Ah, brown."
Suddenly, Mr Brown came out from under the bed and said "How the h**... did you know I was here?!"

Doc Brown and Marty McFly travel back in time to Northern England in 1298

They park behind the bushes near a field, just in time to see two armies about to clash.
"This is the Battle of Falkirk, Marty." says Doc, handing him a pair of binoculars.
Marty watches a man leading the charge into battle and asks, "Who's that guy in the face paint?"
With a tear in his eye, Doc replies "A Great Scot."