I asked my 10 brothers and sisters, but they don't know either.
This month, lunch is on me.
...and my mum woke up and had a right go at me. It was something about waiting until he's born first.
I asked my 17 brothers and sisters, and they didn't know either
Getting sued by the Fine Brothers for having an allergic reaction.
And orders 3 shots for himself. The bartender asks why 3 shots? The man says that he has two brothers overseas and that whenever they drink, they all drink for each other as well.
A few weeks later, the same man comes in again and orders 2 shots for himself. The bartender asks the man if something happened to one of his brothers. The man replies "Nah, I've just stopped drinking."
...and as you can see, they were Wright
Two Muslim brothers come to America and have a contest to see who can become more Americanized. A month later they get together and one proudly says "I took my son to a baseball game and we ate hot dogs!" The other replies "Fuck you, towelhead!"
They all have transisters.
Late one night, he is up, hard at work, when his brother knocks on the door. He gets up from his desk, and answers the door.
"What do you want?" he asks.
His brother responds: "Hey, I'm trying to sleep. Can you stop making a huge racket?"
6 months later she awakes and she asks her doctor about her babies. And he replies
"Oh you had happy healthy twins. One boy, and one girl. Luckily your brother was here to name then"
"Oh god no" says the woman "my brothers an idiot. What are their names"
"The girls name is denise" says the doctor
"Oh thats not to bad, and the boy?"
"Denephew"
So I asked my 27 brothers and sisters and they don't know either.
I asked my 26 brothers and sisters and they didn't know either.
The noble gases because they don't react
A virgin.
Me, mum, my two brothers, my sister and grandma hurried into the living room and gathered round an IKEA box laying on the floor.
"Dad, it's some flat pack furniture, what do you need the whole family for?" I asked.
"Well, it must be these strange Swedish customs", he replies, "It says assembly required".
Student- I've already asked this question to my mum, her 5 brothers and 7 sisters !!
Suddenly they were rear ended by an old man. Furious, they pulled over and were about to beat the shit out of him.
Man - "Hold on, this is unfair. There are four of you and I'm just a weak old man."
Bubba - "You're right. Billy and Bob, you two fight on his side to make it even."
Buck - "But now it's three vs. two."
Bob - "You go home old man, we'll sort this out."
A 13 year old girl who runs faster than her older brothers.
I asked my 19 brothers and sisters but they didn't know either.
The specific ocean.
Broco Lee
He says "honey, tell me something that's going to make me really happy AND really mad at the same time"
She looks at him and says "your dicks bigger than your brothers"
Apparently I should wait until he is born.
A couple were celebrating 60 years of marriage, the old man kissed his wife's neck and then said: "Of our six kids the last one didn's look anything like his brothers and sister, did he have a different father?"
After a moment she took a deep breath and answered yes.
The old man sighed. "Who was he?"
"You.
Something about "Waiting until he's born".
Dying man: My son... Are you here?
Son: Yes dad, I'm right here with you, our whole family is.
Dying man: Daughter, are you here too?
Daughter: Yes dad, I'm here with your grandchildren, we're all with you.
Dying man: What about my wife and brothers?
Wife and brothers: Us too, everyone is here with you.
Dying man: Then why is the fucking light still on in the living room?
I already asked my mom, her four sisters and five brothers.
"Bless me Father, I have sinned, I masturbated while thinking
about my sister."
"That's a disgrace," said the priest, "especially when you
have two gorgeous brothers."
I asked my 17 brothers and sisters and they didn't know either.
They take them to the counter and the pharmacist says, Are these for you?
The older brother says, They aren't for me, they're for my brother.
Very confused the pharmacist asks, But, why does your brother need them? , and the older brother says, Well, the lady on the TV said if you use these you can swim and ride a bicycle and he can't do either of those things.
2 of them moved away, and the 1 brother who stayed would order 3 pints so it would feel like any other night at the pub with his brothers
One day he orders 2 pints, the pub falls silent and the barkeep says they are on the house and offers his condolences. The barkeep then asks which brother had died and the guy says his brothers are both healthy. "But you only ordered 2 pints" to which he replied "oh, I quit drinking"
...I've asked my 17 brothers and sisters and they don't know either...
Saint Peter is sitting at the Pearly Gates when 3 black guys arrive.
St. Pete looked out through the Gates and said "Wait here. I will be right back."
St. Pete goes over to God's office and chambers and tells him who is waiting for entrance.
God says to Pete: "How many times do I have to tell you, you can't be racist and judgmental here. This is heaven. All are loved. All are brothers. Go back and let them in!"
St. Pete goes back to the Gates, looks around, and lets out a heavy sigh. He returns to God's chambers and says "Well, they're gone."
"Who. The black guys?" asked God.
"No. The Gates."
They find a bottle and the Mexican guy decides pick it up and rub it. A genie comes out of the bottle and speaks to them and grants them each one wish.
The Mexican guy goes first and says, "I wish that all my Mexican brethren and I could be transported back to our native homeland and we could all be happy there."
The genie grants his wish and POOF, the Mexican guy disappears.
Now it's the black guy's turn. He says, "I wish that all my African brothers and I could all go back to our motherland and be happy, prosperous and free."
The genie grants his wish and POOF, the Black guy disappears.
Now it's the white guy's turn.
The white guy pauses for a moment, scratches his head and says "Are you telling me that all the Blacks and Mexicans are gone from America?
The genie nods his head and says yes.
The white guy makes up his mind and says, "Ok, well i'll have a Coke, thanks."
Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking with someone about Brothers? Well, here are the best Brothers dad jokes to laugh out loud. Crazy funny puns and Brothers pick up lines to share with friends.