Brothers And Sisters Jokes
113 brothers and sisters jokes and hilarious brothers and sisters puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about brothers and sisters that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Brothers And Sisters Short Jokes
Short brothers and sisters jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The brothers and sisters humour may include short brother and sister jokes also.
- What did our parents do to kill boredom before the internet? I asked my 10 brothers and sisters, but they don't know either.
- I wonder what my parents did to fight boredom before the Internet was a thing I asked my 17 brothers and sisters, and they didn't know either
- If a man and a woman get married in tennessee then move to Texas and get divorced… Are they still brother and sister?
- I've always wondered what my parents did for fun before the internet... So I asked my 27 brothers and sisters and they don't know either.
- How did my parents combat boredom before the internet? I asked my 26 brothers and sisters and they didn't know either.
- Teacher - how did our grandparents kill time without smartphones or internet ? Student- I've already asked this question to my mum, her 5 brothers and 7 sisters !!
- I wondered what my parents did to pass time when they were younger. I asked my 19 brothers and sisters but they didn't know either.
- I wonder what my parents did before the internet I asked my 17 brothers and sisters and they didn't know either
- I've always wondered what parents used to do for fun before the internet. I'll go ask my twelve brothers and sisters.
- How did our grandparents killed time when there were no Smartphones and Internet? I already asked my mom, her four sisters and five brothers.
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Brothers And Sisters One Liners
Which brothers and sisters one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with brothers and sisters? I can suggest the ones about sister brother and sister.
- Happy ramadan to all my Muslim brothers and sisters! This month, lunch is on me.
- Why don't robots have brothers? Because they only have trans-sisters
- A sister got a PS5 for her younger brother on Rakhi.
Best trade ever!
- Robots don't have brothers... They have tran-sisters.
- My dad had six nuts Me, my two brothers, and three sisters
- Why doesn't Chelsea Clinton have a brother or sister? Monica Lewinsky swallowed them.
- Why don't computers have any brothers? They are all trans-sisters.
- My wife divorced me. Now we're back to just being brothers and sisters again :(
- If two people from Kentucky get divorced.. Do they still remain brother and sister?
- My wife and i got along so much better... When we were just brother and sister
- My sister married a black man He's a lawyer. So now I have a brother in law.
- I asked my sister whats the worst pet to have She said "A brother"
- I was with my brother and sister-in-law
- If you get divorced in West Virginia... Are you still considered brother and sister?
- My brothers and sisters claim there are only two genders But my other siblings disagree
Brothers And Sisters Day Jokes
Here is a list of funny brothers and sisters day jokes and even better brothers and sisters day puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What did our parents do when they were bored back in the days before the internet or video games? I asked this question to my 24 brothers and sisters too...
- The other day I saw a brother holding his sister's hand while walking How...touching.
- After a night of heavy drinking, when I woke up n**... in my sister's bed on New Year's day, I feared the worst. When my brother-in-law kissed me on the cheek, those fears were realized.
- I met a brother and sister from Alabama the other day. I swear, if they were any more i**...... They would be a sandwich.
Brothers And Sisters Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about brothers and sisters you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean sons and daughters jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make brothers and sisters pranks.
I often wonder what my parents did to fill their time before the internet was invented...
...I've asked my 17 brothers and sisters and they don't know either...
I was wondering the other day...
I was wondering the other day what our parents must have done for entertainment before television was popular and affordable. I asked my 38 brothers and sisters if they had any ideas, but none of them could suggest an answer either.
A Sunday School Teacher . . .
A Sunday School Teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds.
After explaining the commandment to "Honor" thy Father and thy Mother, she asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?"
Without missing a beat, one little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, "Thou shall not kill."
So the Bears were looking for a new quarterback.
The coach had put together the perfect team for the Chicago Bears. The only thing that was missing was a good quarterback. He had scouted all the colleges and even the Canadian and European Leagues, but he couldn't find a ringer who could ensure a Super Bowl win.
Then one night while watching CNN he saw a war-zone scene in Afghanistan . In one corner of the background, he spotted a young Afghan Muslim soldier with a truly incredible arm. He threw a hand-grenade straight into a 15th story window 100 yards away.
KABOOM!
He threw another hand-grenade 75 yards away, right into a chimney.
KA-BLOOEY!
Then he threw another at a passing car going 90 mph.
BULLS-EYE!
"I've got to get this guy!" Coach said to himself. "He has the perfect arm!"
So, he brings him to the States and teaches him the great game of football. And the Bears go on to win the Super Bowl.
The young Afghan is hailed as the great hero of football, and when the coach asks him what he wants, all the young man wants is to call his mother.
"Mom," he says into the phone, "I just won the Super Bowl!"
"I don't want to talk to you", the old Muslim woman says."You are not my son!"
"I don't think you understand, Mother," the young man pleads. "I've won the greatest sporting event in the world. I'm here among thousands of my adoring fans."
"No! Let me tell you!" his mother retorts. "At this very moment, there are gunshots all around us. The neighborhood is a pile of rubble. Your two brothers were beaten within an inch of their lives last week, and I have to keep your sister in the house so she doesn't get r**...!" The old lady pauses, and then tearfully says, "I will never forgive you for making us move to Chicago !!!!
A salesman knocks on the door and a small child answers
The salses man asks, "Is your father home"?
"No, he was ran over by a tractor".
"I'm sorry to hear that, is your mother home"?
"No, she was ran over by a tractor".
"Do you have any big brother or sister at home"?
"No, they were ran over by a tractor"
"So what are you doing here all alone"?
"I'm driving a tractor"
My dad's a magician
Bob: What does your father do for a living?
Joe: He's a magician. He performs tricks, like sawing people in half.
Bob: Do you have any brothers or sisters?
Joe: Yep, four half-sisters and a half-brother.
A Catholic boy in confession says
"Bless me Father, I have sinned, I m**... while thinking
about my sister."
"That's a disgrace," said the priest, "especially when you
have two gorgeous brothers."
My little sister's sick burn
She's 7, which makes this so much better.
Her: Hey /u/Teeplaysgames, wanna know why Mom named Noah (our brother) Noah?
Me: Sure, why?
Her: Because the first time she saw him, she yelled "NOO! AHHHH!" and the doctor just wrote that down.
s**... ed
One day a little boy was at the park with his grandfather when he saw two dogs having s**.... He asked what they were doing and was told that was how they made puppies. Later that night he had a bad dream and when he went in to his parents' room he saw them having s**.... When he asked what they were doing he was told they were trying to make him a baby brother or sister. Disgusted, he demanded "Well flip her over, I'd rather have a puppy!"
Lucky day for Philadelphia Eagles head coach Chip Kelly.
Philadelphia Eagles head coach Chip Kelly was watching the news when he witnessed something astounding. A young Syrian man had just thrown a hand grenade over 100 yards through the window of a building into a room that housed a s**.... He was so impressed that he had the man found and brought into the states to play for his team.
After a very successful rookie season the young man was discussing his rookie of the year award via telephone with his mother.
She told him that she was proud but living in fear constantly. She continued " your brother was shot twice just in the last few weeks and your sister is regularly the victim of assault. Matters have escalated and life is worse than it has ever been. I will never, ever forgive you for bringing us to Philly."
AMA Request: Kim Davis.
I would like to hear her answer this question, for she seems uniquely qualified to do so:
If a man and woman from Kentucky get a divorce, are they still brother and sister?
The Old Man and his wife
A couple were celebrating 60 years of marriage, the old man kissed his wife's neck and then said: "Of our six kids the last one didn's look anything like his brothers and sister, did he have a different father?"
After a moment she took a deep breath and answered yes.
The old man sighed. "Who was he?"
"You.
Vincent Van Gogh's Relatives
His Obnoxious brother: Please Gogh.
His Dizzy aunt: Verti Gogh.
His prune-loving brother: Gotta Gogh.
His Convenience-Store-Owner cousin: Stop'n'Gogh
His Constipated uncle: Can't Gogh
The Ballroom dancer aunt: Tan Gogh
His Nephew psychoanalyst: E Gogh
His Fruit Loving cousin: Man Gogh
His sister who loves disco: Go Gogh
His bouncy little Nephew: Poe Gogh.
What did our parents do to kill time before the internet?
I asked my 21 brothers and sisters and they had no clue either.
An Indian Chief is sitting under a tree...
An Indian Chief and his son are sitting under a tree, looking out over the plains when his son asks: "Father, why is sister named, Running Deer?"
Chief: "Because, my son, when she was being born I looked out of the teepee and saw a deer running."
Son: "Father, why is brother called Charging Bull?"
Chief: "Because my son, when he was being born I looked out of the teepee and saw a bull running. Why do you ask, p**... Dog?
A boy was jerking off and his sister caught him
Instead of saying anything, she took off her clothes and started to have s**... with her brother.
After finishing the brother said, "Wow, you're as good as mom".
The sister replied, "Ya, dad told me that too".
Blonde Joke gone bad
Brother: Why did the blonde climb over the transparent glass wall?
Sister: I don't know, why?
Brother: To see what was on the other side.
Sister: Pause. *Confused Look.* Wait.. but.. why didn't she just walk around it?
A brother and sister are having s**...
The sister tells her brother: You are better than dad.
To which the brother replies: I know, mom told me.
I wondered what my parents did to kill boredom before the internet.
I mean, I asked my 26 brothers and sisters and none of them had a clue.
A new law recently passed in Arkansas.
When a man and woman are divorced, they can still be brother and sister.
I was sitting there with my dad when he said "Son..
"Your brother and sister always needed something to be good, but you... You were always good for nothin'"
A Native American child asks his father how they choose children's names.
Father - "After you are born, we open the tepee and the first thing we see is what we name you. Like your eldest brother, Soaring Eagle, your sister, Falling Leaves, and your little brother, Grizzly Cub. Why do you ask Two Dogs h**...?"
An Alabama married couple moves to New York and gets a divorce
Are they still brother and sister?
If patricide is killing your father, matricide is killing your mother, and fratricide is killing your brother...
Is pesticide killing your sister?
A son asks his dad what is the difference between practical and theoretical
The tells the son to bring his sister. He then tells her: 'For $1000, would you sleep with your brother?' 'For a thousand, yes!' She answers. The dad then tells the s**... to bring his mother. He tells her: 'For $1000, would you sleep with your son?' 'Foe a thousand, yes!' She replies. The dad then tells his son: 'You see, theoretically, we have $2000, practically, we have two w**...!'
A boy walks in on his parents
A Boy walked in on his parents having s**.... They said; "We're making you a baby brother or sister." He said; "Nono, Do it d**...-style. I'd rather have a puppy."
My parents just told me they'd love another child. I said, I'd love a little brother or sister!
They said, That's not what we meant.
I was wondering what my parents did for fun before the internet
I had no idea and neither did any of my 27 brothers and sisters
Me and my best friend were born within an hour of each other, our mothers said we could be sister and brother
Just like their parents were.
I asked my parents for a baby brother or sister this Christmas
My dad said he'll see if the baby making machine in his room still works.
Mommy has been screaming 'yes' all night so I think it's working
My sister once told me I was her i**... brother
She's really sweet, despite her dyslexia.
A family moves into their new house.
Grandma comes for a visit and asks the youngest child, a five-year-old, how he likes the new place. It's terrific, he says. I have my own room, my brother has his own room, and my sister has her own room. But poor mom is still sleeping with dad.
"Daddy, why is my name Rose?"
One day, a child came up to her father and said, "Daddy, why is my name Rose?"
He replied, "Well, when you were born, a rose fell on your head."
Later on, her younger sister came up to their father and asked, "Daddy, why was I named Lily?"
He replied, "Well, when you were born, a lily fell on your head."
Later, their brother came up to their father and said, "Ghigdsgjjo Hitsggdjkl."
He replied, "Shutup, Brick!"
I asked my parents how they coped with boredom before the internet
It turns out my 18 brothers and sisters don't know either
What did our parents do when they were bored with no internet?
I asked my 18 brothers and sisters and they didn't know either.
I've always wondered what my parents did to ease boredom before the internet was invented
My 19 brothers and sisters don't seem to know either.
My older brother annoyed me, so I gave him condoms with holes in them.
My sister got pregnant.
When you get married...
If you have a father, he becomes a father-in-law
If you have a mother, she becomes a mother-in-law
If you have a brother, he becomes a brother-in-law
If you have a sister, she becomes a sister-in-law
But, your wife, she becomes the law.
An obese woman goes the the doctor.
The doctor attempts to suggest diet and exercise. The woman responds, "Doctor, you don't understand. My mother is obese, my sister is obese, my brother is obese, my cousins are obese. Obesity runs in my family." She doctor thinks for a second and responds, "It sounds like no one runs in your family."
One morning, a little girl goes into the living room and asks her mother...
"Why did you name me Rose, mom?"
Mom says, "As we we leaving the hospital after you were born, a rose petal fell on your head. So we named you Rose."
The daughter says, "Is that why my little brother is named Leaf and little sister is named Rain?"
"Yes," Mom says. "Exactly."
A fourth child pipes up from beside them. "DARGLE BUBPHHH BIBI MMMMOOMOOO!"
"Quiet, Brick!" Mom says.
My dad just called a family meeting.
Me, mum, my two brothers, my sister and grandma hurried into the living room and gathered round an IKEA box laying on the floor.
"Dad, it's some flat pack furniture, what do you need the whole family for?" I asked.
"Well, it must be these strange Swedish customs", he replies, "It says assembly required".
Father's Occupation
"What's your father's occupation?" asked the school secretary on the first day of the new academic year.
"He's a magician, ma'am" said Little Johnny.
"How interesting. What's his favorite trick?"
"He saws people in half."
"Wow! Now, next question. Any brothers or sisters?"
"One half brother and two half sisters."
A boy went to his father:
Daddy, why don't I have any brothers or sisters?
Well, son, when I was a little boy, just like you, my mom used to tell me that it is alright to make mistakes, as long as you don't make them again.
I found my brother in bed with my girlfriend yesterday. I couldn't believe it and I had to get my revenge.
So I shagged his sister.
So, did you hear about the teacher ...
... who was discussing different jobs held by parents.
When she called on Little Johnny, she asked, And what does your father do?
Oh, he's a magician, replied Johnny.
Really? What's his best trick?
His best trick is sawing people in half.
Wonderful! exclaimed the teacher. Tell me, are there any more children in your family?
Yes ma'am, I have a half brother and two half sisters.
Obesity runs in my family.
An obese woman goes to the doctor. The doctor prescribes diet and exercise. The woman says, "Doctor, you don't understand. My mother is obese. My father is obese. My sister is obese. My brother is obese. My aunts are obese. Obesity runs in my family. " The doctor replies, "It sounds like nobody runs in your family."
A little girl ask to her mom: "mom, why am I named Rosa?"
And her mom said: "because when you were born a rose fell on you head"
Her sister Daisy heatrs this and ask: "why is my name Daisy?"
And her mom said: because when you were born a daisy fell in your head"
When their brother Brick heard this, he ask: "GHTAKNDIALFJKQODK"
Whats you father's occupation?
Asked the school secretary, filling in the forms at the start of the academic year. "He's a magician," said the small boy. "How interesting! What's his favorite trick? "Sawing people in half." "Really? Now, next question. Any brothers or sisters?' "Yes, one half brother and two half-sisters."
Why did a brother tell a sister to go sit in the middle of the highway?
Because that's where accidents belong.
The year is 2040, and a curious kid wonders what their parents did to pass the time during Quarantine back in 2020.
The kid asked their 10 brothers and sisters, but they had no clue either.
A girl and her mom are in a car.
Girl: "Why is my name Rose?"
Mom: "Your dad loves roses."
Girl: "Why is my brother named Robin?"
Mom: "Your dad loves the bird."
Girl: "Then why is my sister named Secretary?"
Mom: "That's why we are driving away from home."
Karl Marx
Karl Marx ia a historically famous philosopher but no one ever mentions his sister and brother: Onya, the inventor of the starting p**..., and Skid, who was generally unpopular.
After God created 24 hours of alternating darkness and light, one of the angels asked him, "what are you going to do now?"
God said,
"I think I'm going to call it a day."
But what he really wants ...
While my mother was pregnant with me, my parents warned my three-year-old brother not to get his heart set on either a brother or a sister, as they didn't know what I would be. He seemed to understand but added this caveat: "Well, if it's a dog, I hope it's a Boxer".
My step-sister walked into my room one day and she says, "Hey, big brother... take off my shirt."
So I took off her shirt.
Then she says, "Take off my skirt..."
So I took off her skirt.
Then she says, "Take off my bra and p**......"
So I took off her bra and p**....
Then she says, "If I ever catch you wearing my clothes again, I'm telling mom and dad!"
My step-sister walked into my room one day and
My step-sister walked into my room one day and she says, "Hey, big brother... take off my shirt."
So I took off her shirt.
Then she says, "Take off my skirt..."
So I took off her skirt.
Then she says, "Take off my bra and p**......"
So I took off her bra and p**....
Then she says, "If I ever catch you wearing my clothes again, I'm telling mom and dad!"
Everyone knows comedian Bill Burr, most don't realize he has a huge family with lots of talent.
His mother, Barb, is a famous hair stylist.
Rob, his brother is in jail for theft.
His sister Cally is a great gunsmith.
Lastly, don't forget about his cousin the famous lumberjack, Tim.
A doctor sees an obese women to advise her about weight loss.
The women defensively says, "Look, I'm obese. My sister is obese. My mother is obese. My kids are obese. My brother is obese. Obesity runs in my family." The doctor replies, "It sounds like nobody runs in your family."
A boy hits his sister across the head with a book
The girl cries her eyes out and runs to her dad, "Daddy, Daddy, brother just hit me across the head with a book!"
The dad says "yeah yeah yeah, just another s**... story."
The devil strolls into a church
Everybody starts screaming and running out, the priest almost falls as he jumps over the altar. One old man remains seated seemingly completely unphased by the incident. The devil booms "YOU MUST BE BLIND OLD MAN, DON'T YOU KNOW WHO I AM???" The man replies, "Not really worried brother... I married your sister"
I wonder what my parents did to fight boredom before the internet?
I asked my 18 brothers and sisters and they don't know either.
My brother, my sister, and myself pooled our money together
We treated our dad with this fish therapy where little fish nibble on the dead skin until it is gone.
It was money well spent, because it was much cheaper than a regular f**....
Little Johnny, the magician's son
"What's your father's occupation?" asked the schoolteacher.
"He's a magician, ma'am," said Little Johnny.
"How interesting. What's his favorite trick?" asked the teacher.
"He saws people in half," answered Little Johnny.
"Wow! That must be amazing to watch," said the teacher. "Do you have any brothers or sisters?"
And Little Johnny said, "One half brother and two half sisters."
An old Jew is on his deathbed.
A 90 year-old Jew is on his deathbed. Summoning his last bit of strength, he lifts his head and whispers: "Is my beloved wife Sarah here with me?" And Sarah says, "Yes, I am here."
He then says: "Are my children -- my wonderful children -- are they here with me?" And they reply, "Yes father, we are here with you to see you breathe your last."
And he says: "Are my brothers and sisters here with me as well?" And they too tell him that they are here.
So the old man lays back quietly, closes his eyes, and says, "If everybody is here ... why is the light on in the kitchen?"
A blonde is thinking:
How the h**... does my brother have four sisters when I only have three?
My brother was having a tough time losing weight.
Our sister thought he should cut back gradually, so one day she asked, Mike would you like to split a doughnut with me?
Mike answered, Want to split two?