Broth Jokes
111 broth jokes and hilarious broth puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about broth that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Broth Short Jokes
Short broth jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The broth humour may include short broccoli jokes also.
- The worlds two largest manufacturers of broth seasoning cubes are merging. It was a multi-bouillon dollar deal.
- My work offered to fund my retirement account in soup exclusively... ...I'm the first person to have a Broth IRA.
- What is the main ingredient of a fractal fondue? Mandel broth
Ha ha ha
The puns I make up while working as a grocery cashier.. - What do you call a chance to try a fishy broth at a classy musical event? An opera-tuna-tea.
My ears are still ringing from my wife's groan. - Why did the cannibal only eat half the staff at the restaurant? Too many cooks spoil the broth.
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Broth One Liners
Which broth one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with broth? I can suggest the ones about chicken soup and chicken.
- I over boiled some venison broth earlier... It was deerly mist.
- A chef accidentally put yeast in his broth The result was soup rising
- In Australia they use kangaroo broth to make Marsoupial
- My friend made some broth from fancy sandals yesterday. It was a Birkenstock
- My wife and I decided not to have children. Their tears make the broth too salty.
- What do you call 2,000 lbs of steaming broth? Won ton soup
- What did the beef broth say to the chicken broth? What flavor au jus?
- Where is the best place to buy chicken broth? at the stock market
Cheerful Fun Broth Jokes for Lovely Laughter
What funny jokes about broth you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean be like bro jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make broth pranks.
My brother who has a stutter is in prison.
It's just heartbreaking knowing he will never finish his sentence.
Little brother told me this joke, genius.
"Why did beethoven kill his pet chicken?"
-why
"Because it kept saying "bok bok bok"
My 11 y/o brother told me this
What is pickle bread before its baked?
Dill dough
Al Pacino's brother is steaming that his parents...
named him Cap.
My little brother is extremely proud of this joke. What do you call a reptile who anyways starts fights?
An Insti-Gator
My brother was worried last night that he wouldn't be able to fall asleep because he had a headache.
I told him to make a stiff nightcap and drop a couple of pills in it. You know, just take Aleve of Absinthe.
My brother was in a car accident yesterday and lost his left arm and left leg.
Well actually, he's not my brother... he's my half-brother. He's all right now.
Why did the brother octopi look so alike?
They were itentacle twins.
So my brother is dating a mermaid.
Yeah, apparently their relationship's on the rocks.
My brother pulled this one about his promiscuous dad today
What's the difference between dad and Santa Claus?
Santa Claus stops after 3 hos.
I saw my brothers mate yesterday...
I said, "You shouldn't be doing that, you're brothers!"
My brother got sent to prison for something he didn't do.
He didn't wear gloves.
My brother and I laugh at how Competitive we were as kids.
But I laugh more.
If my brother and I are both trained in the force..
Does that make him my force kin?
My brother threw a can of Pepsi at me from the roof...
I'm just glad it was a soft drink otherwise that may have caused some serious damage.
My brother won a prize for staying in a hospital bed for a really long time.
He got a trophy.
Two brothers live together, and one of them makes tennis equipment for people with gigantism.
Late one night, he is up, hard at work, when his brother knocks on the door. He gets up from his desk, and answers the door.
"What do you want?" he asks.
His brother responds: "Hey, I'm trying to sleep. Can you stop making a huge racket?"
My brother and I took our dog to go play on the frozen lake.
But then the ice broke and my dog fell in. I jumped in to save him. Later, I came home and told my mom about how I saved our dog. She said I should've saved my brother instead.
My brother and I ran out of protein powder.
I turned to him and said, "no whey....."
(true story)
My brother and I started a business manufacturing Dracula toys
I have to make every second Count
Why did the brothel run out of money?
Why did the brothel run out of money? Because all of the investors pulled out.
My brother lost his job at the rubber factory
... but I think he'll bounce back.
My other brother-in-law died.
He was a karate expert, then joined the army. The first time he saluted, he killed himself.
I got my little brother a Cisformer for his birthday
It's like a transformer, but it starts out as a car and stays that way
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Sometimes me and my brothers used to mess with grandpa.
Once we asked him if he knew what a s**... tape was.
He nodded thoughtfully. s**... tapes? Sure, we have those, but your grandmother prefers cuffs.'
My brother just admitted that he broke my favourite lamp,
I'm not sure I'll be able look at him in the same light ever again.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A brother and sister are having s**...
The sister tells her brother: You are better than dad.
To which the brother replies: I know, mom told me.
My brother just finished his doctorals
So he went to Starbucks to celebrate.
The cashier said. "What would you like sir?"
"I would like an espresso please" my brother replied.
"Okay sir, I just need your name." The cashier said.
"It's Stephen" My brother replied.
"With a 'ph'?" The cashier asked.
My brother then replied. "No, it's Stephen, with a PhD"
My brother wanted to play cowboys and indians
So I put on a ten gallon hat and and chaps and he went to MIT and graduated in computer science.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My brother lost his eyesight in a motorboating accident.
Her n**... were pierced.
My brother and his husband decided to adopt a kid
The kid said he was hungry, so my brother responded "Hi hungry, I'm dad!" to which his husband responded "Hi dad, I'm dad!". My brother then replied to him "Hi dad, I'm dad!" They've been stuck like this for two weeks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My brother and I own adjacent farms
The other day he rode over to complain that I was growing m**... on his side of the fence.
I told him to get off his high horse.
Mario's brother died...
But he was still able to contact him through a Luigi board.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
my brother just called me (11pm) with a joke so funny he was still laughing
**what is a bear without teeth?**
**answer: a gummy bear**
since he made it up all by himself, i informed him that i could no longer publicly claim him as my brother. he understood completely.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I went to a brothel that took deer as payment
They described it as the best bang for your buck
Two little brothers were fighting and arguing...
The first one says: Well, you were adopted!
The second one replied: Well, at least they wanted me!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My brother broke down crying and told me about how he was abused by a priest when we were kids.
It was a very touching story.
My Brother took going to jail really badly.
He refused food or drink. He spat and swore at anyone who came near him, and started throwing things.
We never played Monopoly again.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My little brother wanted to be treated like a prince...
...So I slit his t**... while he was sleeping to ensure he didn't lay claim to my crown.
My little brother swallowed a coin and was to taken to the hospital
When I asked how he is doing, the nurse said "No change yet!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I went to a brothel and met a p**...
I asked her what are the prices?
She said:
£20 for a h**...
£50 for a b**...
£80 for s**...
And for £120, i'll do anything!
Anything hmmm....
She's now fitting my downstairs bathroom and repainting my living room.
You can ge some real bargains if you shop around!
My brother and I made a $50 bet on who could throw meat the furthest into the air
I guess you could say the steaks have never been higher.
I let my brother name my twins.
He did fine with my daughter, Denise. But my son may never forgive him for naming him Denephew.
My brother just threw a milk carton at me
How dairy.
My brother has a beef eating disorder and I'm worried
His life is at steak
My brother asked me which super power I'd like
Apparently the united states wasn't a good answer.
My brother has been working on a belt with a built in digital clock.
Talk about a waist of time.
My brother isn't going for a bike ride tomorrow because his brakes don't work
That shouldn't stop him.
My brother is in the ER right now because of a bee sting that swelled his head,
Luckily I was close enough to hit the bee with a shovel.
My brother can no longer return to his school, especially after what he just did...
He graduated.
My brother is turning 32 tomorrow, so I told him not to get his hopes up.
When he asked why, I replied:
"Well, it'll be pretty short. It is your thirty-second birthday after all."
I ask my brother if he wanted to watch any war movies.
He said he was tired of watching people getting shot. I said "you never saw anyone get shot, you graduated HS 12 years ago."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My brother did one like that after a long string of pirate jokes.
"What's a pirate's favourite crime?"
"Arrrrson," I said, chuckling at my cleverness.
"You idiot," he replied, "it's obviously Piracy."
Two brother sit under the christmas tree....
One gets dozens of presents. He opens one after another, a tablet, a drone, a bike and plenty other things.
The other only gets one present with his name on it: a matchbox car.
The one boy with all the presents maliciously asks: guess whom they like more!
The other, calmly playing with the matchbox car, asks back: guess who has cancer.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My brother just came back from Vietnam. I asked him how was it, and he said the country is v**....
Everywhere was 'Phuc' this and 'Phuc' that.
My brother ran away from home to study mime.
We never heard from him again.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My little brother asked out of nowhere how gay men have s**...
I told him to go ask our uncle, when I was his age he gave me a demonstration.
My brother asked if i could help him come up with a way to advertise the new vacation resort he was opening up.
I said "Brochure."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I saw my brother m**... in his room when I was seven
I asked him what he's doing. He didn't want mum to know about this and told me he's practising Chinese kungfu. I shall never forget the day when I volunteered to demonstrate Chinese kungfu in front of everyone in class.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My brother keeps drowning despite my numerous attempts to teach him to stay afloat.
What a dense child.
My brother didnt like the school shooting jokes I was making
I think I should aim for a younger audience.
Me and my brother stole a calendar
We each got six months.
My brother used to throw pennies at me all the time
And that's why I'm afraid of change
My brother and I are partners in a shoe business but we decided to split the business
Now I am the sole proprietor.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My brother has been staying with me for a couple weeks now, which has been awful.
My brother is crazy. Even my neighbors hate him. The other day I opened the door...I caught him m**.... He looks me right in the eyes and goes, Shut the door.
I said, Get inside.
cr
My brother has been writing a stage drama about a dictionary and a thesaurus. I'm really looking forward to it.
I love a play on words.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why did a brother tell a sister to go sit in the middle of the highway?
Because that's where accidents belong.
So my brother made a dad joke
I put my pants in the washing machine and forgot to take my headphones out of my pocket. After they were done washing my brother realized what I did, he asked me
"Is the sound cleaner now?"
There were three brothers Feather, Pillow and Brick.
One day Feather went to his mother and asked:
-Mom, why is my name Feather?
-Because when you were born and we brought you home from the hospital a feather fell on your head.
-she replied.
Next day Pillo asked the same question.
-Mom, why is my name Pillow?
-Because when you were born and we brought you home from the hospital a pillow fell on your head.
The third day Brick went up to her mom and goes:
-The Earth is flat!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What is a brothels dress code?
No shirt, no shoes, no c**....
My brother asked me where I'm going to graduate.
At the living room or the kitchen?
My brother hasn't stopped staring through the window since the storm started
I suppose I should let him in
So my brother told me this joke. He said it is a nerd joke
What's red and bad for your teeth?
A brick!
What's blue and bad for your teeth?
The same brick moving really really fast.
So my brother got an exorcism
Went fine until he fell arrears on the payments and got repossessed
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My brother, my sister, and myself pooled our money together
We treated our dad with this fish therapy where little fish nibble on the dead skin until it is gone.
It was money well spent, because it was much cheaper than a regular f**....
my brother and i are totally failing at reaching out to women's groups to let them know of new vaccine availability
not one response to our invitation to a johnson & johnson injection
My brother thinks I don't give him enough privacy.
That's what he wrote about me in his diary.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My brother got all his properties taken way and thrown in jail last night
When he was in jail he threw f**... all over the walls..
That was the last time we played monopoly.
Three brothers and the lights
Three brothers are arguing about whom will turn the lights off. The first orders the second, and the second orders the third to turn the lights off. In the end they agreed if someone talks he'd turn the lights off.
Days past and the neighbours are starting to get worried about them so they decided to break in. They found the three brothers all dead!
The neighbours saddened by their lost bury the brothers next together. But the third brother starts to shout that he isn't dead and the other two tell him to go turn the lights off.
