The Best 31 Brooklyn Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Brooklyn jokes. There are some brooklyn sicily jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these brooklyn york puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 Funniest Brooklyn Jokes and Puns

Some people are named after where they were conceived. For example Brooklyn, Paris...

My friend Ally doesn't agree.

What do pantyhose and Brooklyn have in common?


So a Rabbi with a frog on his shoulder walks into a bar...

...and the bartender says: "That's awesome! Where'd you get one of those?"

And the frog says "Brooklyn! There's hundreds of em!"

*credit to Robin Williams for the joke

Where is the only place engineers are considered artistic?


jokes about brooklyn

Obama walks into a bar.....

Some time passes after the 2016 US Presidential election, and Barack Obama passes away from old age. He gets bored after a while in heaven, and asks God if he can return to Earth for a while to see how the good ole' US of A is turning out. God agrees.

Obama returns to Brooklyn, and walks into a bar, ordering a beer. He asks the barkeep "How's the country? How are foreign affairs? Any problems currently being faced?"

"Oh, nothing at all, sir. We're an empire now. We're successful."

"But what about Iraq and Afghanistan? Those were terrorist hotspots not too long ago?"

"We control it now. We're an empire. Everything is good."

"But what about Europe, Asia, and their financial crises?"

"That too has been taken care of. We are now finally an empire."

Pleased at the outlook of the country he once led, Obama asks the bartender for the bill:

"65 rubles, sir", replies the bartender.

What do Brooklyn and tight jeans have in common?


A Chinese man, a Mexican man, a black man, and a white man...

Are standing by the edge of a cliff. The Chinese guy says," This is for all my ninjas back in China." and he jumps off the cliff. The Mexican guy says," This is for all my amigos back in Mexico." and jumps off the cliff. Then, the black guy says," This is for all my brothas back in Brooklyn." and pushes the white guy off the cliff.

Brooklyn joke, A Chinese man, a Mexican man, a black man, and a white man...

My 8 year old niece told me I could share her joke with you guys, but I had to give her the credit. Her name is Brooklyn.

Do you know how to make a tissue dance?

You put a little boogie in it.


When you go to Brooklyn always bring a camera, because there are many things in Brooklyn that you will see, then never see again in your life...

Starting with that camera.

Guy walks into a bar...

So this Jewish guy walks into a bar in New York with a parrot on his shoulder.
The Bartender goes where'd you get that?
And the parrot says, "in Brooklyn, they're everywhere."

What's a Brooklyn contractors favorite dance?


You can explore brooklyn decker reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean brooklyn asgard dad jokes. There are also brooklyn puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I thought it was Franz Beckenbauer's opinion on whether David Beckham's son would make it as a footballer.

What do you call four singing sheep in Brooklyn?

A baaabershop quartet.

A Jewish businessman in Brooklyn

A Jewish businessman in Brooklyn decided to send his son to Israel to absorb some of the culture of the homeland.

When the son returned, the father asked him to tell him about his trip.

The son said, "Pop, I had a great time in Israel. Oh, and by the way, I converted to Christianity."

"Oh, my," said the father. What have I done?"

He decided to go ask his old friend Jacob what to do.

Jake said, "Funny you should ask. I too sent my son to Israel, and he also came back a Christian. Perhaps we should go see the rabbi and ask him what we should do."

So they went to see the rabbi.

The rabbi said, "Funny you should ask. I too sent my son to Israel. He also came back a Christian. What is happening to our young people?

The three of them prayed and explained what had happened to their sons and asked God what to do.

Suddenly a voice came loud and clear from Heaven.

The Voice said, "Funny you should ask. I, too, sent my Son to Israel...

Who is a Brooklyn dog's favorite composer?


Bach Bach

I like to be frank and earnest with women.

In Brooklyn, I'm Frank and in Chicago I'm Ernest.

Brooklyn joke, I like to be frank and earnest with women.

Why did a Chinese restaurant in Brooklyn start charging more for its Kung Pao chicken?

It was "gentry fried."

If a one "L" Lama is a priest and a 2 "L" llama is an animal, what is a 3 "L" lama?

A fire in Brooklyn

When doctors go on strike ....

"Doctors at a hospital in Brooklyn, New York have gone on strike. Hospital officials say they will find out what the Doctors' demands are as soon as they can get a pharmacist over there to read the picket signs!"

An old man in Brooklyn gets a phone call that his cheese shop blew up.

Oh, no! I'd better get down there right away!

The guy on the phone tells him, Nah, take your time. All that's left where de shop was is de brie.

What's Hitler's favorite TV show?

Brooklyn Nein-Nein!

A Rabbi walks into a bar with a frog on his shoulder...

The bartender asks, Hey buddy, where did you get that?
The frog responds, Brooklyn, they're all over the place!

What did Biggie say when he first saw a map of the United States?


How do you recite the alphabet in Brooklyn?

Fuckin' "A"! Fuckin' "B"! Fuckin' "C"!

You know the toughest part about being a gay black police officer?

The discrimination.

Stolen from Brooklyn Nine-Nine.

A friend told me "I can't wait to get out of Brooklyn, they took my rims, put the car on bricks"

I said "you moved to Brooklyn so you can get a brownstone, now you got 4"

Brooklyn joke, A friend told me "I can't wait to get out of Brooklyn, they took my rims, put the car on bricks"

A Chassidic Jew walks into a bar...

He's wearing a long black frock coat, his ear locks are curled and dangling, and he's got a large bullfrog just sitting on his shoulder. The bartender turns around, sees him, and says, "hey, where'd you get that thing?" The bullfrog croaks, "in Brooklyn, there's hundreds of them!"

A rabbi goes into a bar

with a HUGE bullfrog on his shoulder. Bartender looks up at him, and says "Where in the WORLD did you get that thing????". Bullfrog answers "Brooklyn, they're EVERYWHERE!".


Credit to JP

A Hipster and a Duck

Part 1.
A hipster walks into a bar with a duck on his head. The bartender goes Hey, where did you get that?
The duck goes In Brooklyn, there's thousands of them!

Part 2
A hipster walks into a Brooklyn bar with a duck on his head. The bartender asks What can I do for you?
The duck responds for starters, get this guy off my ass!

Scattered Ashes

An elderly woman from Brooklyn decided to prepare her will. She told her rabbi she had two final requests. First, she wanted to be cremated, and second, she wanted her ashes scattered over Wal-Mart. "Wal-Mart!" the rabbi exclaimed. "Why Wal-Mart?"

The elderly woman says "Then I'll be sure my daughters visit me twice a week."

A hillbilly walks into a Brooklyn bar…

…with a frog on his shoulder. As he steps up to the bar the bartender asks him, Hey where did you get that? The frog answers East Kentucky, they're all over the place down there.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the brooklyn twerking puns are supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working brooklyn ebo piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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