The Best 20 Broken Hand Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Broken Hand jokes. There are some broken hand bicep jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these broken hand slamming puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Broken Hand Jokes and Puns

Does it hurt anymore?

A woman playing Golf hit a man nearby. He put his hands together between his legs. Fell on the ground & rolled around in pain. She rushed to him & offered to relieve his pain as she was a Doctor.
Reluctantly he agreed.
She gently took his hands away. Unzipped his pants & put her hands inside.
She massaged him tenderly for a few minutes & asked: "How does it feel?"
He replied: "Feels great but I still think my thumb is broken"

A woman playing Golf hit a man nearby.

A woman playing Golf hit a man nearby. He put his hands together between his legs, fell on the ground & rolled around in pain.

She rushed to him & offered to relieve his pain as she was a Doctor. Reluctantly he agreed. She gently took his hands away. Unzipped his pants & put her hands inside. She massaged him tenderly for a few minutes & asked: "How does it feel?"

He replied: "Feels great, but I still think my thumb is broken"

A woman playing golf hits a nearby man...

She rushes over to the man who is on the ground, rolling around screaming in pain with his hands between his legs.

She profusely apologizes and offers to relieve his pain since she is a doctor and reluctantly he agrees. She gently moves his hands to his sides and unzips his pants and puts her hands inside. She massages him tenderly for a few minutes and asks: "How does it feel?"

He replies: "It feels great but I still think my thumb is broken".

What do you call an Italian with two broken hands?

Mute

Today I asked my daughter for a phone book...

She said "you're such a boomer" and handed me her phone.

So, now, the spiders dead, my daughters phone is broken, and she's really pissed at me now..


A man's fence is broken and he neess to hire someone to fix it

So he goes online to find someone to fix his fence for him but he is unsatisfied with their prices, that is until he finds a Buddhist monk who will do it for free.

He is initially surprised by this and assumes it might be a fake listing, but since it's free he feels like he has nothing to lose so he hires him.

Sure enough a few days later the monk shows up with a toolkit in hand, the man shows the monk that his fence has been ripped out of the ground and that he needs to replace it.

About an hour later the monk walks in and tells the man he is finished, and when the man goes outside he sees that the fence is perfect, thinking he can't just tell the monk to leave after doing such a great job for free he invites the monk inside for a cup of coffee.

The man then starts talking to the monk, "It surprised me to see a monk offering services for fence repair, why do you do it?" he asked

the monk replied "Religious reasons."

The man then says "I don't know much about Buddhism, why do you need to repair fences?"

"Because" the monk replied, "You would be surprised at the amount of karma you get for reposting."

A broken drum is the best gift for Christmas

You just can't beat it.

On the other hand, a wife would be the worst gift because you definitely can...

Flying Blind

A Frenchman, Englishman, and an American are flying in an airplane on a cloudy, storming night when suddenly the plane is struck by lightning.

The pilot turns to his three passengers and says, "The plane's GPS is broken. I need each of you to stick your hand out the door, feel around, and tell me which city we are flying over judging by what you touch."

The Frenchman goes first. He opens the door, puts his hand outside of the door, and brings it in a minute later. "We're flying over Paris! I could feel the Eiffel Tower!"

The Englishman is next. He sticks his hand outside and draws it back in a minute later. "I just touched Big Ben! We are just over London!"

Finally, it is the American's turn. He shoves his hand outside the plane and brings it back in immediately. "We're flying over Detroit. I know because my watch just got stolen."

If I have 10 cookies and you take 5, what do you have?

A broken hand.

My friend handed me broken scissors...

I told him this isn't going to cut it.

Teacher: if you have 10 cookies and someone takes away half, what would they have?

Dot : a broken hand.

(Came across this one from Animaniacs recently)

You can explore broken hand dislocating reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean broken hand breaking dad jokes. There are also broken hand puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


After experiencing weeks of pain, a man finally decides to go to the hospital...

The doctor says, "What seems to be the problem?"
The man replies, "It hurts here (touches his thigh), it hurts here (touches his wrist), it hurts here (touches his hip). It hurts everywhere!"
After a few seconds of examining the patient, the doctor realizes whats wrong with the man.
The doctor grabs his hand and says, "Sir, you have a broken finger."

I have 10 cookies, you take one. What do you have now?

A black eye, broken hand, and no cookie

Two men are walking side by side down the street

One of them sees a broken piece of mirror on the ground, grabs it, looks at it, and says, This guy looks so familiar, but I can't remember where I know him from. The other guy grabs it from his hand, takes a look at it, and says, It's me, you idiot!

My friend asked me if I could try my hand at fixing his broken clock

After tinkering with it for a bit, I handed it back to him.

"How will I know if it's fixed?" he asked.

To which I replied, "Time will tell."

If you have ten cookies and someone takes half of them, what will they have?

A broken hand.

I was at a garage sale yesterday

My wife saw a beautiful grandfather clock, but the guy told her it was beyond repair.

The little hand was broken, and it wouldn't move, so the clock was basically useless.

The guy said if we could fix it, we could take it home with us.

My wife kicked the clock, making the little hand start moving again.

Needless to say, the clock is hours.

(Original) Why should you keep a broken clock?

It's just nice having an extra set of hands around.

I was surprised to fail No Nut November this early and with a broken hand too.

It's just hard to grip.


A man with a broken hand says to doctor, "Will I be able to play guitar after the operation on my hand?" The doctor says, "Yes of course." "That's great! I never could before."

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the broken hand wrists jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working broken hand thumb index piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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