Broken Door Jokes
16 broken door jokes and hilarious broken door puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about broken door that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Broken Door Short Jokes
Short broken door jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The broken door humour may include short locked door jokes also.
- I heard that if you get water on the cover of In Through The Out Door, it changes color. I just tried it, and it worked for a second, but now my iPod is broken.
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Broken Door One Liners
Which broken door one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with broken door? I can suggest the ones about front door and closed door.
- If any of you can teach me how to fix a broken hinge... My door is always open.
Broken Door Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about broken door you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean barn door jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make broken door pranks.
Flying Blind
A Frenchman, Englishman, and an American are flying in an airplane on a cloudy, storming night when suddenly the plane is struck by lightning.
The pilot turns to his three passengers and says, "The plane's GPS is broken. I need each of you to stick your hand out the door, feel around, and tell me which city we are flying over judging by what you touch."
The Frenchman goes first. He opens the door, puts his hand outside of the door, and brings it in a minute later. "We're flying over Paris! I could feel the Eiffel Tower!"
The Englishman is next. He sticks his hand outside and draws it back in a minute later. "I just touched Big Ben! We are just over London!"
Finally, it is the American's turn. He shoves his hand outside the plane and brings it back in immediately. "We're flying over Detroit. I know because my watch just got stolen."
A Broken Watch
A guy is walking down the street and suddenly notices that his watch has stopped working. As he stands there musing over this discovery, he notices that the display window of a nearby shop has several dozen watches and clocks in it.
The man steps inside the door of the shop and asks the proprietor, "Excuse me, my watch has stopped working. I wonder if you can repair it for me?"
The proprietor looks up from his desk and says, "What are you talking about? I'm not a watchmaker--I'm a mohel. I perform circumcisions."
Confused, the gentleman asks, "Well then why do you have so many watches and clocks in your window?"
The mohel calmly replies, "What would you prefer that I display?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I heard the woman in the apartment next door having s**... last night
She was moaning and groaning and they were thumping against the wall.
Turns out her mother had fallen and broken her hip and was hitting the wall with her cane for help.
Now I feel sorta bad for m**... so many times.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Latvian Joke
Man sits in broken cottage with daughter. Man is cold and hungry. Man not have potato for days.
"Knock, knock" is heard at door.
"Who there is" man say.
"Politburo"
"Politburo who" say man.
Politburo burst in cottage r**... daughter. Man now cold, hungry and sad.
Two horrible knock knock jokes.
Knock knock.
> Who's there?
Door inspector.
> Door inspector who?
Knock knock.
-----
Knock knock.
> Who's there?
Doorbell inspector.
> Doorbell inspector who?
Your doorbell's broken.
1937 in Moscow
Moscow. The year is 1937. At around 3 am, a man wakes up to the sound of the door being broken down and he goes to inspect it. He returns to the bedroom where his wife is trembling and crying. "Don't worry my dear, it's just burglars!"
A Therapist is complaining to his friend about not having any clients
His friend replies it may have something to do with putting his profession on the office door in such large font that it had to be broken into two words.
A guy is driving a Mercedes with a blonde girl in a front seat.
She looked around the car, amazed, and then she saw the Mercedes logo, prominent on the front of the car's hood.
- Hey, what's that? - she asked.
- That? - he replied, chuckling - That's an aiming reticle. I use it to be able to hit pedestrians more reliably.
The girl fell silent for a time, and the guy started thinking about a problem he had at work that day.
Suddenly, he heard a thud, the car shook a bit, and he could've sworn he heard something like a muffled scream
- Wha... What was that? - he asked in panic
- Your aiming reticle must be broken - blonde girl replied - If I hadn't opened the door, you would've missed this one, too!
My Vietnamese neighbor brought me some pho
A Vietnamese woman recently moved in next door. I guess she wanted to make friends so she brought me a bowl of pho. She didn't say anything and smiled, so I assumed she didn't speak English.
That night, I devoured the Vietnamese delicacy but quickly realized it gave me a cold, as I was coughing my heart out.
The next day, she comes back to collect the bowl. She says English, Bowl please. I thought this was broken English so I tried to speak back and tell her how I caught a cold from the pho. I said pho cough . I wonder why she hates me so much.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Translated Brazilian Joke - A broken car in the desert
** In Brazil it is common making jokes about our colonizers, the Portuguese. I hope they do the same about us in Portugal, so... **
A Portuguese, a Brazilian and an Argentinian are driving through the desert when their car suddenly breaks.
João, the Brazilian suggests each one takes a piece of the car to help their journey walking back to the town.
Santiago, the Argentinian says: - I'll take the seat, so if I'm tired I can sit on it and rest.
João, the Brazilian says: - I'll take the radiator, so if I'm thirsty I can drink the water.
And Manuel, the Portuguese says: - Well, I'll take the door.
And both João and Santiago question Manuel: - The door?
Manuel says: - Yes, the door!!! So if it's too warm I can open the window.
:)
How I got my car fixed.
So I'm sitting on the side of the road, car broken down, when a guy pulls up to me. He gets out and asks if I need help. I said, "Sure, if you can fix it." He walks around back and kicks the bumper, slams his fist on the trunk, and twists the gas gap a bunch of times. Then he walks around to the side, opens the door, and slams it shut a few times, then pulls on the front handle for about a minute. He asks me to try it again, and sure enough it starts. I ask him, "Is it fixed?" He says, "No, I tricked the car into thinking it works again. I say, "Wow, you're not too bad of a bad mechanic." Confused, he says, "Mechanic? No.... I'm a Chiropractor."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The Three Nuns
One day, three nuns decided to disobey their rules and walk around the convert n**.... Because the convert was visible from a road, they decided to close the blinds so no one would see them. The blinds were slightly broken so there was a single opening. the nuns decided to have one of the nuns keep watch while the other two went about their day. Later that day, a man started walking up the sidewalk to the convert. the nun on watched yelled to the others to hide. The man walked up to the window and called out to see if anyone was there. One of the nuns piped up and sayed she was, and asked what he needed. The man said that he was a blind man, looking for work. The nuns whispered to themselves, and agreed that since he was blind, they could let him in to help him. So the first nun opeded the door, still completely n**... along with the other two nuns. When the door opened, the man recoiled back in surprise. "why did you answer the door completely n**...?" he asked. Then nun was taken aback, " i thought you said you were blind!"
The man said "no, i am a BLINDS man, and i came to fix your blinds!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A guy and his wife went to an expensive golf course.
He said to his wife, "Be careful of the expensive houses around us. I don't know if we can afford to break a window."
His wife tees off and breaks the biggest window of the most expensive looking house.
He said, "Oh no! We had better go ask how much it's gonna be."
So he and his wife go up to the house and see the door open.
They went inside and saw the golf ball lying next to a broken glass bottle.
A man walks up and says, "Thank you!"
The husband said, "I'm sorry about the..."
And the man interrupts, "Oh don't worry about the window. I have to thank you for getting me out of the bottle. You see, I'm a genie. So you get one wish and your wife gets one, but, in return, you have to give me one."
The husband asks for $100 million.
The genie says, "Done."
The wife asks for 80 exotic sports cars.
Genie says, "Done."
"Now, my wish is to have s**... with your wife because, you know, I've been trapped in that bottle for so long."
They agreed since their extravagant wishes had been granted.
And so the genie has s**... with the man's wife, not just once but many times.
When they're done, the genie asks the wife, "How old is your husband?"
She answers, "33."
And, the man said, "And he still believes in genies?"