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Broken Bones Jokes

24 broken bones jokes and hilarious broken bones puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about broken bones that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Broken Bones Short Jokes

Short broken bones jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The broken bones humour may include short breaking bones jokes also.

  1. Do you have any bruises, sprains, strains, or broken bones? No? Good! Now that we've gotten four maladies out of the way, how the heck are ya?
  2. One of my most selfless acts was when I had several bones broken when stopping a fight. Those kids never stood a chance
  3. Blonde joke A blonde goes to the doctor. She uses her right index finger, says it hurts when I touch my leg, my collar bone and my arm. "What's wrong?" She says.
    "Your finger is broken."
  4. Chuck Norris once gave a man the Hiemlich Manuever.
    That man still holds the record for most bones broken.
  5. Probably already been done but... What is wrong with a humorless person?
    A broken funny bone.
    I'll leave now.
  6. My friend gave me his number and told me to hit him up. Now he's got two broken bones and a restraining order...

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Broken Bones One Liners

Which broken bones one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with broken bones? I can suggest the ones about old bones and broken leg.

  1. Why aren't broken bones a problem in India? Everyone is already in a caste
  2. What do you need for a movie about broken bones? An awesome cast
  3. I auditioned for a TV show for people with broken bones. I didn't make the cast.
  4. What do you call a broken bone factory? A manufracturer
  5. Why were all of Napoleon's bones broken in two? Because he was Napoleon bone apart.
  6. Condoms are like injured bones... If they are broken you are s**....

Entertaining Broken Bones Jokes to Laugh Out Loud Fun with Everyone

What funny jokes about broken bones you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean broken glass jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make broken bones pranks.

A man named Theodore

A man named Theodore works in a hospital and scans people for broken bones. Despite being the only person at the hospital who does this, he has never scanned anyone under the age of 18. He wonders why this is, and suddenly it hits him.
He's x-ray Ted.

A blonde walks into a hospital

She complains that every bone in her body is broken.
The doctor says "where does it hurt?"
The blonde points at her leg, "here".
She points at her arm, "here"
She points at her other leg and arm "here and here".
The doctor examins her and promptly says "Ma'am, you have a broken finger"

So Doc' Can she run a marathon?

After fixing a young girl's broken bone a father asks "Will she be able to run a marathon when she recovers?"
To which the doctor replied "I don't see why not!"
The dad then says "That's odd, she couldn't run a marathon before!"

Sports injuries

An ice hockey player, a rodeo clown and a beautiful figure skater walk into a bar. After a couple of drinks they start to compare their injuries.
None of my teeth are my own, I once lost seven teeth during one game. , started the hockey player.
Well, that's nothing - during my career I have broken each and every one of my bones , replied the rodeo clown.
The figure skater rolls her eyes and says: I used to be a Red Sox infielder. Do yo have any idea what that ball can do to a man, if you forget to wear the jock strap.

Bungee Jumping

Two guys in America are bungee jumping on a bridge, they meet at the top and say, "hey this is fun, I bet you they never heard about this in Mexico."
A few months go by and the two have set up a bungee jumping business, ready to start testing it out. There is a big crowd at the bottom of the bridge, all are curious.
One of them puts on the bungee gear and the other stays at the top to catch him.
The guys testing jumps and comes back up with a few bruises, the guy at the top fails to catch him, the tester goes back down.
One more time the tester comes back up, it appears he has a few broken bones, the guy at the top fails to catch him again, the tester goes back down.
Finally the tester comes back up, more bruises, more broken bones, the guy at the top finally catches him and asks what happened?
The tester can barely speak because he is in pain, but quietly says, "What is Piñata?!?"

Topical Jokes for 1/2

Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid suffered fractured ribs, and broken bones in his face after falling off of a piece of exercise equipment. Reid is no stranger to injury, like the time he tried to open a jar of mayonnaise, and broke both of his legs.
In Colorado a survey determined that 90% of residents who voted to legalize m**..., would vote the same way again. The remaining 10% were too high to understand the question.
In Montana, a boy's parents rewarded him with $500 dollars after he gave up soda for a year. An hour later the boy was found dead, floating facedown in a bathtub full of Dr. Pepper.