The Best 35 Broken Arm Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Broken Arm jokes. There are some broken arm wrists jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these broken arm breaking puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 Funniest Broken Arm Jokes and Puns

A husband sends a text to his wife.

Honey, I got hit by a car outside of the office. Tina brought me to the hospital. They have been taking tests and doing x-rays. The blow to my head is very strong, may be serious. Also, I have 3 broken ribs, a broken arm, a compound fracture on my left leg and they may have to amputate the right foot.

Wife's Response:
Who is Tina?

What do you call an Italian with a broken arm?

Speech impaired.

Husband send a text to his wife

Husband's text:
>Honey, I got hit by a car outside the office.
Paula brought me to the Hospital.
Doctors presently doing tests and taking X-rays.
Severe blow to my head but not likely to have any lasting effects. Wound required 19 stitches.
I have three broken ribs, a broken arm and compound fracture in the left leg. Amputation of my right foot is a possibility.
Love you.

Wife's response:
>Who's Paula?

I've broken my arm in 3 places.

I've decided to stop going to those places.

jokes about broken arm

Some bloke started talking to me in the pub last night.

"My mate came off his motorbike today," he said.

"Oh really?" I asked.

"Yes," he replied. "He has slight brain damage, two broken arms and is completely blind in one eye."

"Blimey," I said. "No wonder he came off it then."

A man goes to a doctors office, and says Whenever I touch anywhere on my body, it hurts

He touches his arm, and screams in agony. He touches his shoulder, and screams in agony. The doctor observes all this and says, I think you have a broken finger.

Patient Doctor, I've broken my arm in several places

Doctor Well don't go to those places.

Jets Fan

A guy walks into a bar with a dachshund under his arm. The dog is wearing a Jets jersey helmet and is holding Jets pom poms.

The bartender says,"Hey! No pets allowed in here! You'll have to leave!"

The man begs, "Look I'm desperate. We're both big fans, my TV is broken, and this is the only place we can see the game!"

After securing a promise that the dog will behave and warning him that if there is any trouble they will be thrown out, the bartender relents and allows them to stay in the bar and watch the game.

The game begins with the Jets receiving a kickoff. They march down field stop at the 30,and kick a field goal. With that the dog jumps up on the bar and begins walking up and down the bar giving everyone a high-five.

The bartender says,"Wow that is the most amazing thing I've ever seen! What does the dog do if they score a touchdown?"

"I don't know," replies the owner, "I've only had him for four years."

The Way Women Think

Husband's Message (by text):

"Darling, I got hit by a car outside the office. Paula brought me to the hospital. They have been doing tests and taking X-rays. The blow to my head though very strong, should not have any serious or lasting effect but, I have three broken ribs, a broken arm, a compound fracture of the left leg and they may have to amputate my right foot. Fingers crossed!"

Wife's Response:
"Who's Paula?"

A man walks into the doctors.

He says dr it hurts when I touch here
And touches his arm
It also hurts here
And touches his ribs
and here
And touches his back
It hurts here too
And touches his calf
It hurts here
And touches his elbow
and here
And touches his head
It even hurts here
And touches his abdomen

And the dr says -
Yeah you have a broken finger.

I told my doctor that I've broken my arm in 2 places.

He suggested that I shouldn't visit these 2 places again.

You can explore broken arm dislocated reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean broken arm bicep dad jokes. There are also broken arm puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

What do you call an Irishman with two broken arms?

sober

Remember that AMA guy whose mother slept with him because he had broken his arms?

She was adding incest to injury.

A blonde goes to the doctor...

A blonde goes to the doctor. The doctor looks at her and asks what seems to be the problem?


"Everything hurts! No matter where I touch."

"My arms, my thighs, my chest, my head! All of it!"

He looks her over completely and finally looks at her in amazement.

"Lady, your *finger* is broken."

I was involved in a car accident today

Got away with a broken arm, no idea who it belonged to but now it's mine.

A man walks into a doctor's office with a broken arm.

He asks the doctor, "Doc, when my arm is healed, will I be able to play guitar?"

Doctor: "Well the fracture doesn't appear to be too bad, so yes you should be able to when it's all healed"

Man: "That's fantastic news! I've always wanted to be able to play guitar."

Trip to the doctor.

A man walks into a doctor's office and sits down on the hospital bed and says, "Doc, it hurts me on my leg right here, on my arm right here, and on my stomach right here. I don't know whats wrong!

The Doctor turns to the man and says,"You idiot, your finger is broken!"

A redhead walks into the Dr. Office.....

She sits down on the examining table and tells the Doctor "I think I am going to die. I hurt all over. I touch my arm and it hurts, I my head and it hurts. I touch my abdomen and it hurts."

The doctor looks at her and says, "Let me guess that you are naturally blonde."

"Why yes, How did you guess?"

"Because you have a broken finger."

What did the seal with the broken arm say to the shark.

Do not consume if seal is broken

What has broken arms, broken legs and is on the bottom of a river?

People who tell jokes about the Mafia.

A man was telling friends how first-aid classes had prepared him for an emergency.

I saw a woman hit by a car, he said. She had a broken arm, a twisted knee and a skull fracture.
How horrible! What did you do?

Thanks to my first-aid training I knew just how to handle it. I sat on the curb and put my head between my knees to keep from fainting.

A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, please help me. I hurt all over."

The doctor asked the man to explain more.
The man said, "When I touch my arm it hurts, when I touch my leg it hurts, when I touch my head it hurts. Everywhere I touch it hurts."
The doctor examined the man and said. "Mr Smith, your finger is broken!"

A man went to the doctors office and said "I've broken my arm in several places"....

The Doctor tells him "Well, you should stop going to those places".

A man is rushed into the hospital after an accident.

Doctor, Doctor! I've broken my arm in several places."

The Doctor examines the patient's arm, and after a few moments of staring with intensity, he looked at the patient.

Doctor: lol, well don't go to those places.

Patient asking...

Patient asking: "Doctor, it hurts when I press my leg. It hurts, when I press my arm. It hurts, when I press my head. What's that?"Doctor: "You have a broken finger!"

A blonde walks into a hospital

She complains that every bone in her body is broken.

The doctor says "where does it hurt?"

The blonde points at her leg, "here".

She points at her arm, "here"

She points at her other leg and arm "here and here".

The doctor examins her and promptly says "Ma'am, you have a broken finger"

People complain about Game of Thrones having a lot of incest...

...but Bran could have broken his arms instead of his legs

No matter how hard I try, I always seem to be going round in circles.

Having a broken arm while in a wheelchair isn't ideal.

What do you call an Italian with a broken arm?

Speech impediment.

What do you call a guy who has broken all his arms and legs?

An Ambulance

A man goes to the doctor

A man goes to the doctor and says "Doctor! I've broken my arm in several places!"
The Doctor looks at him like he's an idiot and says "Well then, don't go to those places..."

A man went to the doctor's in an awful state. Cuts and bruises to his face and a suspected broken arm.

What happened to you? asked the doctor.

It's my wife, she had one of her dreadful nightmares.

Do you mean she did this to you while she was asleep?

Oh no, doctor, it was when she shouted out in her sleep, 'Quick, get out, my husband's coming home,' that, without thinking, I jumped out of the window.

A man with a broken arm comes in doctors office

Doctor: "Okay, so tell me how did you break it?"

Man: "Well, I was trying to avoid a child.."

Doctor: "Ah, yes, and you crashed your car."

Man: "Um, I fell off of bed."

Did you hear about the baby born with a broken arm?

He was trying to hang on until after the wedding.

The Story of Oedipus

It all started off with a couple of broken arms...

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the broken arm outstretched puns are supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working broken arm shattered piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes