Broadway Jokes
41 broadway jokes and hilarious broadway puns to laugh out loud. Read places jokes about broadway that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
From musicals inspired by Tetris to ones based on the Ave Maria, this article has the funniest Broadway jokes for all the theatre and music lovers out there! Enjoy the laughter!
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Funniest Broadway Short Jokes
Short broadway jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The broadway humour may include short theatre jokes also.
- Our President Elect is a real tough guy... The candidate who was going to "defeat ISIS" is currently at war with Saturday Night Live and a Broadway musical.
- Have you seen the new Broadway production about the dictionary? It's a great play on words.
- What do you get when you cross a gay man and a Jew? A hit Broadway show.
(heard Drew Carey make this joke in a Whose Line blooper reel) - Did you hear? Broadway is making a theatrical production on puns! It's going to be a *huge* play on words!
- There was a Broadway performance about puns... But don't get too excited. It was just a play on words.
- Did you hear the one about the Vegan Crossfitter who saw Hamilton live on Broadway with the original cast? He didn't know which one to talk about first.
- What's the difference between broadway and sitting on the toilet? On Broadway you're trying to make a splash!
- I was invited to Broadway show called Vocabulary and I had to go. I never pass up a good play on words.
- So I saw a Broadway show about Dictionaries the other night. I guess one could call it a Play on words .
- So the square root of -1 is performing in a Broadway show Suddenly, an audience member stands up and shouts "I'm sure everyone will agree that i could replace you!"
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Broadway One Liners
Which broadway one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with broadway? I can suggest the ones about bands and theater.
- What do you get when you combine a gay man and a Jew? A hit Broadway musical
- What do you call 2 broadway shows going out for dinner? Play date.
- Have you heard about the new Broadway act based on the dictionary? It's a play on words.
- What's the best way to make sure the Italian entry wins a Broadway Trophy? Rigatoni
- Why did the Kool-Aid man stop acting on Broadway? He always broke the fourth wall.
- I recently attended a Broadway show about Puns... ...it was a play on words.
- What do you get if you cross a gay man with a Jewish man? A hit Broadway musical.
- What not to say at a broadway play This is so bad I wish I was Abraham Lincoln
- A rubber band just auditioned on Broadway It was kind of a stretch.
Broadway Production Jokes
Here is a list of funny broadway production jokes and even better broadway production puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- It's time to act now Let's stage a socialist takeover of Broadway and seize the means of productions!
- I recently saw a Broadway production about the origin of language It was just a play on words
- I have a Romanian friend who does tech for Broadway productions... I have a Czech one, too!
- Did you hear that they're making a Broadway production based off the dictionary? It's a play on words.
Broadway Jokes: Lighting the Marquee of Merriment in the Theatre of Laughter
What funny jokes about broadway you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean audition jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make broadway pranks.
An old actor has trouble getting work due to failing memory...
After contacting many people that he worked with in the past , he is finally able to land a job in a popular new Broadway play. The director tells him its only one line at the beginning of the play, but it is a very important line. It sets the mood for the rest of the play. It is ESSENTIAL he nails the line. The old actor emphasizes that he will nail it. The director reluctantly agrees and proceeds to tell him his role. You will take a beautiful rose, bring it to your nose and take a deep breath and say the following line: *Ah, the sweet scent of my mistress…* That's it. Do not screw this up! The old actor thanks him 10 times over and proceeds to practice for the next 2 weeks nonstop.
Opening night comes. It's a sold out theater. He takes to the stage, spotlight on him. He raises his hand, takes a deep breath and says the line perfectly * Ah, the sweet scent of my mistress… * Just after the line is delivered the auditorium burst into laughter. He walks off the stage distraught. I don't get it. I nailed the line perfectly. What happened? The director looks at him and yells YOU IDIOT! YOU FORGOT THE FLOWER!
Did you hear about the Italian Chef?
He pasta way. We cannoli do so much. He was a real pizza work. You never sausage a guy. Sad about his brother, the broadway actor, in jail because he tried to rigatoni. His friend, the french chef, didn't make it to work- he couldn't make the escargot.
In 1985, new wave band, A-Ha, wrote a song for a new Broadway version of Peter Pan that was never used. In the musical, Tinkerbell was supposed to sing to Peter, urging him to try and fight Captain Hook's right hand man with the intent of demoralizing Hook and his pirate crew...
Taaaaake oooooon Smeeeee
In 1969, the Beatles originally wrote one of their hit songs for a Broadway version of Peter Pan. Captain Hook's right hand man wanted to Broker a truce that would give Hook the ability to fly and give Peter and the Lost Boys safety from pirates. It ended with a big event where Hook and Peter flew..
Come together, right now... over Smee.
Did you hear about the Italian that wanted to cheat the Broadway award voting?
He wanted to rig a Tony.
Why did the actor jump off a building in Times Square?
He wanted to make a hit on Broadway.
Why do gay guys always play straight guys on Broadway?
They've already spent years acting straight, might as well get paid for it.
Did You hear about the Italian mob boss who had a famous Broadway star assassinated in an e**...?
He told his hit man to rigatoni.
