Briton Jokes to Giggle and Enjoy A Night of Unforgettable Laughter
A Briton, a Frenchman, and a Russian are standing and staring at a portrait of Adam and Eve...
"Look at their calm, their reserve" says the Briton. "Surely they must be British!"
"Nonsense!" Replies the Frenchman. "They are beautiful. Surely they must be French!"
The Russian finally speaks, "they have no clothes, no shelter, only an apple to eat, and are being told this is paradise. They are Russian."
What did Britons use to light their homes before candles?
Electricity.
A Briton flies into Australia
and is asked by the immigration officer, Do you have any felony convictions?
The Briton replies, Sorry. I didn't realize that was still a requirement.
What's the difference between an American and a Briton?
Britons think 200 miles is a long distance, and American's think 200 years is a long time.
An American, a Briton, and a North Korean look at a picture of Adam and Eve
An American, a Briton, and a North Korean look at a picture of Adam and Eve in the garden of Eden and try to figure out what nationality they are.
The American says, "Look at how free and independent they are, they must be Americans."
The Briton says, "What are you talking about, look at how calm and reserved they are, the are obviously British."
The North Korean says, "You two are both missing the point. They have no clothes, no shelter, they only have and apple to eat between them and yet they are being told that they live in paradise. They're clearly North Korean."
Britons vs. Americans
Americans:
It's Mom not Mum
It's Chips not Crisps
It's Fries not Chips
It's Color not Colour
It's Soccer not Football
It's Football not Rugby
Britons:
It's School not Shooting Range.
I entered the s**... Olympics for team GB...
Yeah, it's a real thing you know. Anyway, I was team GB's first ever entrant in the endurance category. I trained really hard for the event and put my all in. I'm proud to say that I'm the first ever Briton to come first and last in the same event.
Literary historians recently found a Briton recipe for a citrus-based sauce translated by Samuel Taylor Coleridge
It was called the 'Lime of the Ancient Marinade'
A Briton is on vacation in Germany.
The man walks into a bär. Dies.
Why do Britons in airports seem kind of fishy?
Is it because they Keep Clam in Carry On?
How Britons shower.
The same as you, d**....
First, we get nice and wet.
Then we get the tea.
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