British Food Jokes
19 british food jokes and hilarious british food puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about british food that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest British Food Short Jokes
Short british food jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The british food humour may include short british people jokes also.
- British food, British weather and British culture. And thus a great colonial empire of sailors was born.
- How do you know when a British person is demonstrating great hospitality? You visit their house and they don't offer you their food.
- It's funny that the British Enpire conquered the spice traders of the world... ...considering they never used any of it in their food.
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British Food One Liners
Which british food one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with british food? I can suggest the ones about indian food and french food.
- What's a British caveman vampire slayer's favorite food? Tea bone stake
- Who won the Indian food cooking competition? The British chef.
- What's a British royal's favorite food? In-bread.
- There are no people who eat nothing but british food...
Amusing British Food Jokes to Make You Laugh with Friends
What funny jokes about british food you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean british english jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make british food pranks.
A British man was talking to his friend about his views on Brexit...
"These b**... immigrants come over here. They're up to no good, right? I hate these b**... immigrants. They need to go back to where they came from."
His friend replies with "But why do you hate them so much?"
The British man replies, "I'll tell you why I hate them, I'll tell you why. It's because they're not even trying to be British. That's why. They don't even TRY to be British. They come here, and bring their own b**... culture. They bring their own food, spit their own b**... languages, try to take over the whole b**... place."
His friend replies with "Well, that sounds British to me"
A Russian, a Frenchman, and an Englishman are in an art museum admiring a painting of Adam and Eve in the gardens of Eden.
The Englishman takes a look at the painting and says "They look so calm, they must be British!" The Frenchmen responds "no no! They're n**..., so beautiful, they must be French!" The Russian says "They have no food, no shelter, nothing but an apple to eat, and they are being told this is paradise? They're clearly Russian!"
Four kids walk into an interview...
Four kids walk into an interview. One is American, one is British, one is African, and one is Chinese. The interviewer asks them all the same question: "In your own opinion, what do you think of the scarcity of food in other countries?" The British kid asks "What is scarcity?" The American kid asks "What are other countries?" The African kid asks "What is food?" And the Chinese kid asks "What is my own opinion?"
A Russian, a Frenchman, and an Englishman are in an art museum admiring a painting of Adam and Eve in the gardens of Eden.
The Englishman takes a look at the painting and says "They look so calm, they must be British!" The Frenchmen responds "no no! They're n**..., so beautiful, they must be French!" The Russian says "They have no food, no shelter, nothing but an apple to eat, and they are being told this is paradise? ...They're clearly Russian!"
(Whole thing done in thick fake accents)
A Brit, a Frenchman and a Soviet are asked what nationality Adam and Eve were.
The Brit exclaims They must have been British! Look at how gentlemanly Adam behaved towards Eve. He must have been an Englishman.
Outrageous! Says the Frenchman. They must have been French. Look at the love that they exhibited towards each other! Only the French can love like that.
The Soviet chuckles and says You're both wrong. They must have been Soviet; they had no clothes, no food, and someone in charge was telling them they were in paradise .
I'm tired of hearing people say British food tastes awful. In fact, British food is the third most delicious food in the world
The first being French food, and the second is food from all other countries.
A Russian man is travelling across Britain
A Russian man is travelling across Britain , he pops to a corner shop and buys some British Snacks to try. He takes the food to the Till and the cashier says: that'll be £12,50 please. To which the Russian replies Vat?
Oh that's already taken care of mate.
The leaders of the Big Three after the conference in Yalta
After WW2 in 1945 the leaders of the Big Three(USA, UK and the Soviet Union) respectively Roosevelt, Churchill and Stalin met in Yalta for a conference to decide the fate of the world.
After the conference they wanted to have some fun. They decided to try and make the Persian cat in the residence to eat mustard.
Churchill started first. He took a silver spoon with some mustard and tried his best to feed the cat but failed.
-You british people don't understand, it should be done with democracy - said Roosevelt.
He took some chicken and put some mustard on it. The cat sniffed for a moment but walked away with no interest in the food he offered.
Without any hesitation Stalin took the cat and started to spread mustard on the fluffy tail. The cat started meowing loudly and lickеd the tail to wash out the mustard. Meowed and licked, meowed and licked... Then Stalin said wisely:
-That's how we do everything in our country, voluntarily and with a song.