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Brightest Jokes

29 brightest jokes and hilarious brightest puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about brightest that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Not the brightest jokes can draw a few laughs but the brighter you get, the safer they become. Read this article to find the cleverest jokes to make sure your audience really enjoys the show.

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Funniest Brightest Short Jokes

Short brightest jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The brightest humour may include short smartest jokes also.

  1. My friend told me I always say phrases wrong But he's not the brightest knife in the chandelier
  2. On October 31st, we will have a full moon, and the 7th planet from the sun will be its brightest... So when someone sees the moon that day, they will likely see Uranus too...
  3. Son: (Sobbing) "Dad, my teacher said I would never be the brightest star in the sky" Dad: "You're not Sirius?!"
  4. My friend told me the north star wasn't the brightest in the night sky. I told him that's a Sirius accusation!
  5. World War 1 could've been easily be prevented.. I mean, singing Take me out probably wasn't Franz Ferdinand's brightest idea.
  6. I posted a question about the brightest star in the night sky, but all I got were joke replies. Should've added the [Sirius] tag.
  7. A guy I met told me he identifies as the brightest star in the night sky… I said- Are you Sirius?
  8. My neighbor's girlfriend said he was the brightest light in her world. Man, that world must be awful dark.
  9. Doctor, doctor, I keep suffering from halucinations that I'm the brightest star in the night sky. Surely, you can't be Sirius.
  10. I looked up at Canus Major and a star told me "I'm the brightest star in the sky!" And I said "You can't be Sirius!"

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Brightest One Liners

Which brightest one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with brightest? I can suggest the ones about strongest and cleanest.

  1. Why did the winter solstice get an award? For being the "brightest" day of the year.
  2. What did the winter solstice say to the darkness? "I shine brightest when you're around!"
  3. What's the brightest star in the night sky? Sirius replies only.
  4. Florida is the sunshine state But clearly not the brightest state
  5. Did you know that fireflies are the smartest insect? They're the brightest one.
  6. What's the brightest airship ever made? LED Zeppelin
  7. I may not be the brightest nail in the bucket, but at least I have a point.
  8. Which teeth are the brightest? The wisdom teeth
  9. I'm not the brightest shed in the tool But you definitely read that wrong
  10. I hate when people use candles to light up their rooms It's not the brightest idea
  11. What university has the most brightest students and staff? University of Brighton
  12. "I'm the brightest star!" "b**..."

    "I'm Sirius"

Not The Brightest Jokes

Here is a list of funny not the brightest jokes and even better not the brightest puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • A popular kid at school said I was the brightest person he knew. I think his exact words were, "I've never seen someone so p**... white".
  • 30 r**... walk into a bar.. ..they're not the brightest, you would have thought they'd learned their lesson
Brightest joke, 30 r**... walk into a bar..

Amusing & Witty Brightest Jokes for Laughter-Filled Fun

What funny jokes about brightest you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean brighter jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make brightest pranks.

A group of professors are on a plane.

A group of professors are on a plane as an experiment. They were told that the plane was made by their students. Naturally everyone panicked, their students were not the brightest people. However there was one professor who did not show any sings of fear. When they asked him why he replied "how can i be worried if the plane won't even take off."

The elder statesman was giving his farewell speech.

"And when I die, bury my head in Central Pennsylvania, for that was where I had my brightest ideas. Bury my hands in Washington, D.C., for that was where I accomplished the most work. Bury my feet on the West Coast, for that was where I ran the hardest."
Just then, a journalist interrupted, "Sir, where should we bury your a**...? Because you've made the whole country a s**...!".

Brightest joke, Doctor, doctor, I keep suffering from halucinations that I'm the brightest star in the night sky.