The Best 30 Brewery Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Brewery jokes. There are some brewery beer jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these brewery guiness puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Brewery Jokes and Puns

I dated a one legged girl who worked at a brewery

She was in charge of the hops

I used to date a girl who had one leg and worked at a brewery...

She was in charge of the hops...

Beer is good.


After the Great Britain Beer Festival, in London, all the brewery presidents decided to go out for a beer.

The guy from Corona sits down and says, "Hey Senor, I would like the world's best beer, a Corona." The bartender dusts off a bottle from the shelf and gives it to him.

The guy from Budweiser says, "I'd like the best beer in the world, give me 'The King Of Beers', a Budweiser." The bartender gives him one.

The guy from Coors says, "I'd like the only beer made with Rocky Mountain spring water, give me a Coors." He gets it.

The guy from Guinness sits down and says, "Give me a Coke." The bartender is a little taken aback, but gives him what he ordered.

The other brewery presidents look over at him and ask "Why aren't you drinking a Guinness?" and the Guinness president replies, "Well, I figured if you guys aren't drinking beer, neither would I."

Brewery joke, Beer is good.

Father, what causes arthritis?

A drunk that smelled like a brewery got on a bus one day. He sat down next to a priest. The drunk's shirt was stained, his face was full of bright red lipstick and he had a half-empty bottle of wine sticking out of his pocket. He opened his newspaper and started reading. A couple minutes later, he asked the priest, ''Father, what causes arthritis?''
''Mister, it's caused by loose living, being with cheap, wicked women, too much alcohol, and contempt for your fellow man,'' the priest replied. ''Imagine that,'' the drunk muttered. He returned to reading his paper.

The priest, thinking about what he had said, turned to the man and apologized: ''I'm sorry, I didn't mean to come on so strong. How long have you had arthritis?'' ''I don't have arthritis, Father,'' the drunk said, ''but I just read in the paper that the Pope does.''

Brenda O'Malley is home making dinner, as usual, When Tim Finnegan arrives at her door.

"Brenda, may I come in?" he asks. "I've somethin' to tell ya".

"Of course you can come in, you're always welcome, Tim. But where's my husband?"

"That's what I'm here to be telling ya, Brenda. There was an accident down at the Guinness brewery..."

"Oh, God no!" cries Brenda. "Please don't tell me."

"I must, Brenda. Your husband Shamus is dead and gone. I'm sorry."

Finally, she looked up at Tim. "How did it happen, Tim?"

"It was terrible, Brenda. He fell into a vat of Guinness Stout and drowned."

"Oh my dear Jesus! But you must tell me the truth, Tim. Did he at least go quickly?"


"Well, Brenda... No. In fact, He got out three times to pee"


Two Chinese guys rob a brewery. The one asks the other, "Is this whiskey?"

The other man replies, "Not as whiskey as whobbing a bank."

A man knocked on Mrs Smith's door.

"I'm afraid there's been a terrible accident at the brewery," he said.
"Your husband fell into a giant vat of beer and drowned."

Mrs Smith started crying. "Oh poor thing, he had no chance!"

"I don't know about that," the man replied. "He got out three times to use the toilet."

Brewery joke, A man knocked on Mrs Smith's door.

Hello? I am calling to tell you I love you!

"Sir, I am sorry but I think you got the wrong number. This is a brewery!"

"I Know!"

A Guinness brewery worker travels to the home of his co-worker with bad news.

I'm sorry Mary, but Keith died at the brewery today'.

'Oh my god!' replied Mary, 'What happened?!'

'He drown in a vat of Guinness Stout' said the worker, sadly.

'That's terrible! Was it a quick death at least?' asked Mary.

'I'm afraid not,' the worker replied, 'He got out twice to take a piss'.

Why did the bunny work in the brewery?

he knew a lot about hops

A Instagram user walks into a bar...

A Instagram user walks into a #bar #pub #brewery #happyhour #bigplace #beer #night #party #fun #photography #conceptual #art #drink #peperoni #olives #lights #table #chair #followme

You can explore brewery pilsner reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean brewery datsun dad jokes. There are also brewery puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


A man died in an accident when working at the brewery.

When the police arrived at his home to inform his wife, she asked how it happened. "Well, madam, I'm sorry to say he fell into one of the beer cauldrons and drowned," said the officer. In tears, the wife asked the officer, "Please, at least tell me it was a quick death". "Unfortunately not," the officer explains, "witnesses say he climbed out at least twice to go to the bathroom".

What does a brewery and a Nickelback concert have in common?

They are both responsible for a lot of boos.

Mrs Donnelly: Mick? You took me husband Donnie on da trip to Guinness brewery, and heres you are alone. Where's me Donnie?

Mick: Its terrible news, miss. Donnie were leanin over one of those great big vats of stout, fell in and drowned.


Mrs Donnelly (starting to tear up): Oh lord in heaven... Mick! At least tell me he died quick.


Mick: I can't miss. He got out to pee three times.

Happy Saint Paddies ta ya all!

What do you call a jew who works at a brewery?

A he brew.

Tragedy at the Guiness brewery

Paddy O Reilly works at the Guiness brewery, one day Mrs O Reilly gets a knock on the door, it's the manager.....he tells her there was a terrible accident and her husband drowned in a vat of Guiness.

She is devastated and finally manages to sob...please tell me he went quickly and didnt suffer.

The manager replied, I'm afraid not, in fact he got out 3 times to pee

Brewery joke, Tragedy at the Guiness brewery

A Man Walks Up and Knocks on Mrs. O'Reilly's door.

Oh, Mrs. O'Reilly, I have terrible news. There was an accident at the brewery and your husband fell into a vat of Guinness and drowned.

Oh! It must have been horrible, she cried!

Aye, we pulled him out three times.

I used to date a girl with one leg who worked at a brewery.

Her name was Eileen and she was in charge of the hops.

My father died today at work...

he worked at the brewery and fell into a beer tank. All the co-workers rushed to help him and to get him out, but despite their best efforts my dad managed to fight them all back and then drowned.


I once dated a one legged girl who worked at a local brewery.

She was in charge of the hops

Why did the brewery keep rabbits on hand?

So they could add the hops.

Anheuser Busch is using a Georgia brewery to can water for flood victims in Oklahoma and Texas

They're labeling very clearly so people don't confuse it with Bud Light

Robert died...

He was working on the local brewery and fell inside the beer tank, drowning. It is believed he didn't suffer as footage shows him leaving the tank twice to take a leak.

Just been told my uncle tragically died at the brewery. He fell into a vat and drowned.

I don't think he suffered too much though, because he managed to get out twice to pee.

I'm dating a one legged girl who works at a brewery.

She handles the hops.

What does a Jewish man do in a brewery?

He brew.

A woman is preparing dinner for her husband

While she was setting the table, a minister and the manager of the brewery the husband works at knock on the door.

When she opens the door the manager says, "We're extremely sorry, but this morning your husband fell into one of the vats of beer and drowned"

The woman explodes at the manager, "He died this morning and your telling me this now!?!?!?"

The manager replies, "Well, he got out a couple times to use the bathroom"

How did the Jewish brewery owner make his drinks?

Hebrew it

I went to a brewery tour and the tour guide asked what horrible thing happened in the early 1900s

Apparently women's suffrage wasn't the right answer.

I went to the local craft brewery last night and it was so busy...

The place was really hopping.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the brewery ale jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working brewery distillery piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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