The Best 45 Brew Jokes
Following is our collection of funny Brew jokes. There are some brew stout jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these brew reali puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Top 10 Funniest Brew Jokes and Puns
I tried brewing my coffee with Red Bull instead of water.
I drank it and left my house to go to work. After 15 minutes I realized I forgot my car.
What do you call a jew who works at a brewery?
A he brew.
An Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman walk into a bar...
...and each take a seat and order a beer. When the Englishman gets his beer, he sees a fly floating in it, and politely asks for a different brew. The Scotsman, intrigued by this, looks into his beer and also notices a fly in it. He shrugs and picks it out. When the Irishman's beer arrives, also containing one fly, he's had enough. He picks up the fly, holds it very close to his mouth, and says...
"Spit it out, lad, spit it all out!"
"Sir, it appears the bomb was hidden in the Japanese man's beer!"
"Looks like the killer…
BREW his mind."
Did you hear the story of the Rabbi who lifted his synagogue into the air with a bunch of balloons?
He brew up.
What do you say to a Jewish New Zealander?
Hee brew
Why are jewish potion makers all male?
He brew
I heard Dunkin Donuts has a cold brew now.
Cool beans.
A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee each morning....
The wife claims, "You should do it, because you get up first and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee."
The husband says, "You are in charge of cooking around here so you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee."
The wife replied, "No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible that the man should make the coffee."
The husband replied, "I can't believe that; show me!"
So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament and showed him at the top of several pages, that it indeed says..........
"HEBREWS"
I'm goint to brew a stout beer named stdout
..that you can import!
Why did the tea bag walk into a bar?
To grab a brew
You can explore brew beverage reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean brew coffee dad jokes. There are also brew puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
I'm opening the first place you can create a painting and brew your own beer
It's called "Arts & Crafts"
Two brewers made a joke about drowning in beverage.
You wouldn't understand it. It's an in-cider joke.
I left my tea to brew for too long...
...it was a steep learning curve.
Why is it smarter so smoke herb than drink brew?
'Cuz bud wiser.
As a Korean man, I do love to crack a cold brew but....
I would never kill a Warmbier.
I decided to go to a coffee shop today
The barista behind the counter said that I should try a new but expensive brew of coffee. It was $9 but I decided to try it. I took a sip of the beverage, and almost instantly spat it out.
"Wha... This tastes like mud!" I shouted at the barista.
He turned and smiled. "It should. It was fresh ground this morning!"
What do you call it when you brew a batch of wine too early?
Statutory Grape.
What do you get when a brewmaster punches you lightly on the shoulder?
Microbruise
What are Jew's favorite brew?
Hebrew
Whats a New Zealanders favorite drink?
Brew
What does a Jewish man do in a brewery?
He brew.
A Christian couple
Newlyweds wake up one morning on their honeymoon and the man suggests: "Darling, why don't you brew us some coffee?"
Wife looks confused: "But that's your task, honey."
What? Why?
"It's all over the Bible, dearest."
"The Bible says nothing about who's supposed to be brewing coffee!"
The wife grabs hold of a copy and starts flipping pages at random: "See? Everywhere: Hebrews, Hebrews, Hebrews."
Why did the brewery keep rabbits on hand?
So they could add the hops.
I brewed my coffee with Redbull today
I can smell noises
How long does it take to brew traditional Chinese tea produced through a process including withering the plant under strong sun and oxidation before curling and twisting?
tOolong.
Why do the New Zealanders prefer drinking in the living room?
Because it's home, brew.
BREWER: We're sorry to inform you Mrs. O'reilly that your husband drowned today at the Guinness factory
WIFE: Well at least give me the comfort in knowing it was a quick death
BREWER: well he drowned in only 15 minutes, short considering he got out of the keg twice to pee
What kind of tea do cops make?
Police brew tali tea.
What does a brewery and a Nickelback concert have in common?
They are both responsible for a lot of boos.
Two crows are sitting at the bar having a craft beer.
One crow drinks his down quickly and rudly takes his buddy's beer. The other crow snatches it back and exclaims, "My crow brew!"
I used Redbull instead of water to brew my coffee today
Got halfway to work, realized I forgot my car.
What do you call a funny type of coffee?
A brew ha-ha!
I went to a brewery tour and the tour guide asked what horrible thing happened in the early 1900s
Apparently women's suffrage wasn't the right answer.
How did the Jewish man shake up his morning routine?
He brew some coffee.
Joke translated from Romanian
A police officer goes to a Romanian town and asks one of the residents:
"So, where do you brew the liquor?"
The man replies:
"See that church over there? Everywhere except there."
How does Moses make his coffee?
Hebrews it.
How do you describe your jewish friend who makes alcohol?
He Brew
Brewing company Hart Dickins is catering to its female customer base with a new alcoholic apple cider.
After all, what woman wouldn't want a Hart Dickins cider?
Husband asks Wife to make coffee
Newlyweds wake up one morning on their honeymoon and the man suggests: Darling, why don't you brew us some coffee? Wife looks confused, But that's your task, honey. woman says What? Why? man asks. It's all over the Bible, dear. woman replies The Bible says nothing about who's supposed to be brewing coffee! man replies confused. The wife grabs hold of a copy and starts flipping pages at random: See? Everywhere: Hebrews, Hebrews, Hebrews.
If Jesus wouldn't brew coffee...
... what would hebrew?
At my job there is a strict policy that no one can discuss the topic of beer...
We don't talk about brew no, no, no.
In a brewery, the ceiling is getting painted
One of the painters falls into a barrel with 1000 liters of beer and drowns. His boss then goes to the colleague's wife to report the death. "Did my husband suffer much?" "I don't think so, he went out to take a piss three times."
Who makes cold brew coffee?
A Brrrrrista.
Three witches are standing around a bubbling caldron.
The first witch tastes the brew. "It needs an eye of newt," she says.
"Agreed" says the second.
"Aye," says the newt.
"Perfect," says the third.
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the brew coors puns are supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working brew potion piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.