Breathless Jokes
16 breathless jokes and hilarious breathless puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about breathless that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Breathless Short Jokes
Short breathless jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The breathless humour may include short breathing heavy jokes also.
- My wife phoned me, panting and breathless. "Where are you?" she moaned.
"I'm at the pub." I replied.
She said, "I think the baby's coming!"
I said, "Well, he won't get in. He's underage." - Just got 15 Valentines cards! It's left me completely breathless... The security guard in Clintons Cards gave me quite a chase
- I just got over 15 Valentines cards! It left me breathless... The security guard at the Hallmark store gave quite a chase.
- The Patriots visit to the White House was so GREAT... it left Aaron Hernandez choked up and ultimately breathless
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Breathless One Liners
Which breathless one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with breathless? I can suggest the ones about breeze and breathtaking.
- Little Johnny's trip to the zoo left him breathless and the boa constrictor euthanized.
- I was once abducted The aleins even showed me outside the ship, i was breathless
- I just replaced the 'n' with a 'm'. Dr. Asthana became breathless.
- Cardi B is attractive but... her sister Cardi O left me breathless.
Gather Around for Fun Breathless Jokes and Laughter with Friends
What funny jokes about breathless you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean breath so bad jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make breathless pranks.
I saw a woman drop her purse in the high street this morning, so…
I quickly followed her. As I was just about to tap her on the shoulder she started running for a bus. So I ran after her shouting, "You dropped your purse! You dropped your purse!"
She didn't hear me and proceeded to get onto the bus, so I got on the bus too. As I walked to the back of the bus I breathlessly said, "You dropped your purse on the floor outside McDonald's."
"Thank you so much" she said, "Where is it?"
I said, "I've just told you, on the floor outside McDonald's."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
An older couple is having breakfast when the old woman says to her husband
"Just think, honey, we've been married for 60 years.?"
"Yes," he replies. "Sixty years ago we were sitting here at this breakfast table together. And we were probably n**... as jaybirds."
"Well," the old woman snickers, "should we get n**... again for old time's sake?"
So they s**... off their clothing and sit back down at the table. "You know," the old woman says breathlessly, "my n**... are as hot for you today as they were 60 years ago."
"I'm not surprised," replies the old man. "One's in your coffee and the other's in your oatmeal!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do Taylor Swift and Avada Kedavra have in common?
They'll leave you breathless or with a n**... scar.
A bass player runs into a bar...
where the guitar player and the singer are busy setting up. Breathless, he says "We've got a big problem! I locked my keys in the van!" "Whatever, man" says the singer, "We've got a gig to do, we'll worry about it later." "No, you don't understand" said the bassist, "the drummer is trapped inside!"
What's the difference
A man walks into a pharmacy, buys some antibiotics, pays $25.45, walks out. A second later, the pharmacist bolts out of the pharmacy, catches up with the man, and breathlessly says: "sir, there's been a mistake! Instead of the antibiotics, I gave you Cyanide. " The man asks: "and what's the difference?" The pharmacist says: "two dollars and ten cents".
What is kitty?
A three-year-old boy went with his dad to see a new litter of kittens.
On returning home, he breathlessly informed his mother, "There were two boy kittens and two girl kittens."
"How did you know that?" his mother asked.
"Daddy picked them up and looked underneath," he replied. "I think it's printed on the bottom."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Did you hear the news about the s**...?
I forgot the whole story, but I remember that he was left breathless by the outcome.
