Breastfeed Jokes
28 breastfeed jokes and hilarious breastfeed puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about breastfeed that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Breastfeed Short Jokes
Short breastfeed jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The breastfeed humour may include short breast feeding jokes also.
- This hating of people that breastfeed in public really has to stop. I can raise my cat any way I want.
- Women that breastfeed in public are so miserable They never smile when I take their picture
- I hate people who finds it disgusting when i breastfeed in public .. It's completely normal and strenghtens the bond between me and my dog.
- A solar eclipse is like watching a woman breastfeed in public It's beautiful, it's free, but under no circumstances should you look at it.
- My wife was so angry today. She said that she'll never public breastfeed anymore. She also told me that she'll do it only after our first child is born.
- My childhood was tough. I'm so ugly, that when I was a baby my mother refused to breastfeed me.
She told me she just liked me as a friend. - To the people who say nursing is a woman's job, I agree. Men can't exactly breastfeed their babies.
- How do we know when we have truly demolished gender roles? When men breastfeed in public just as frequently as women.
- If you don't like it when women breastfeed in public, does that make you.. Lactate intolerant?
- Some idiot filled his cars gas tank with milk On the bright side he doesn't need to breastfeed his wife anymore...
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Breastfeed One Liners
Which breastfeed one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with breastfeed? I can suggest the ones about breast milk and produce milk.
- What do you get when you motorboat a woman who breastfeeds? A milkshake
- Yo mama is so old that when she breastfeeds it's just powder.
- You're so ugly, Yo' Mama had to be drunk to breastfeed you.
- Yo momma so ugly, she had to get the baby drunk so that she could breastfeed it.
- there is this mom at work who breastfeeds her kid every meeting is a lunch meeting
- Why don't Vegans breastfeed their newborns? Because nobody will have s**... with them.
- Why don't Irish mothers breastfeed? Because it's too painful to boil your n**....
Share Hilarious Breastfeed Jokes and Enjoy Unforgettable Laughter
What funny jokes about breastfeed you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean mammary jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make breastfeed pranks.
A man was riding on a full bus minding his own business when the gorgeous woman next to him started to breast-feed her baby.
The baby wouldn't take it so she said, "Come on sweetie, eat it all up or I'll have to give it to this nice man next to us."
Five minutes later the baby was still not feeding, so she said, "Come on, honey. Take it or I'll give it to this nice man here." A few minutes later the anxious man blurted out, "Come on kid. Make up your mind! I was supposed to get off four stops ago!"
A woman was trying to breastfeed her son in a bus
The kid throws a tantrum and refuses to s**... on his mother's breast. So in a fit, the mother tells her son, "If you don't want this milk, I'm gonna give this to the gentleman beside us."
An hour later, the kid still refused to breastfeed. So she tells her son again, "If you won't breastfeed, I'm really gonna give this to this man beside us!"
Then the guy beside them suddenly interrupted, "Please make up your mind now. My stop was 30 minutes ago."
A man is sitting next to woman on a bus
The woman is trying to breastfeed, but the baby refuses to s**... on her breast. She warns her child, if you don't start s**..., I'm going to give it to the man next to me , but the baby still refuses.
After 20 minutes, the woman repeats the threat several times to no avail. The man finally clears his t**... and says, look here lady, you need to make up your mind, I was supposed to get off 6 bus stops ago!
I used to drive my infant daughter (who refused to dribk from a bottle) to the hospital where my wife worked as a nurse so she could breastfeed during her lunch break.
I'm no math major, but I'm pretty sure that means that my wife was nursing².
Women can breastfeed in public as long as they have a blanket over them.
So I don't understand this Mall Cop's problem with my m**... towel.
A joke my cousin sister told me when I was 9.
For 12 years Maya was the only child. She was coddled and adored by her mom and dad who gave her all the attention. So when her little sister was born, and she began to recieve less attention, she grew resentful.
She hated her little baby sister and wanted her dead. So while watching her mother breast-feed the baby, she hatched a plan.
That night, while her parents slept, she sneaked into their room and rubbed poison on her mother's n**....
When she woke the next day, she found out her dad had died.
