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Bra Jokes

164 bra jokes and hilarious bra puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about bra that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Bra Short Jokes

Short bra jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The bra humour may include short thong jokes also.

  1. Victoria's Secret has launched a revolutionary new bra, "croatia" ..it has lot's of support but no cup
  2. A bag of Frito Lays and a bra are the same... Once you open them you realize there's only half of what you thought inside
  3. After spending 20 minutes trying to take my girlfriend's bra off, I've decided to give up I wish I'd never put it on now
  4. it's just taken me half an hour to get my girlfriends bra off it's the last time i'm trying it on
  5. I spent half an hour trying to take off my girlfriends bra. I gave up in the end. I wish I never tried it on in the first place.
  6. I don't understand why guys think it's so difficult to take off a girl's bra. I can do it with both hands behind my back!
  7. I spent 30 minutes trying to take off my wife's bra today. I should never have put in on in the first place.
  8. My Kids Got p**... at Me for Cooking pancake this Morning Seems he was their favorite rabbit
  9. What does a push up bra and a dictatorship have in common? They both oppress those on the inside. They both lie to those on the outside. And they both raise monuments to the fallen.
  10. Ive just spent 20 minutes trying to get my girlfriends bra off. I really shouldn't have put it on in the first place.

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Bra One Liners

Which bra one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with bra? I can suggest the ones about bikini and lingerie.

  1. Tripped over my friends bra... ..she is always setting booby traps!
  2. What did the bra say to the hat? You go on a head, I'll give these two a lift
  3. What is the German word for a bra? stoppenfromfloppen
  4. Why was the mermaid kicked out of Geometry class? She forgot her Algae-bra.
  5. My favorite type of bra is algebra.
  6. A dyslexic man walks into a bra Thank you.
  7. What did the mermaid forget to bring to math class? Her algae bra
  8. When I get home im going to tear my wife's bra right off The straps are killing me
  9. I walked into my sister's room and tripped on a bra. It was a booby-trap.
  10. Haven't worn a bra in 4 days.... I love being a man
  11. How do you say "bra" in German? Dat schud stoppem frum floppen.
  12. What do you call a bra in Germany? A Stoppemfromfloppen
  13. I bought a push up bra today... It didn't work, I can still only do 2...
  14. What does a mermaid mathematician wear? An algae bra!
  15. A dyslexic man walks into a bra Either way he's getting at least two cups

Bra Size Jokes

Here is a list of funny bra size jokes and even better bra size puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Half empty or half full? Doesn't matter if your cup is half full or half empty, the point is,, You need to buy a different size bra.
  • What's a pirates favorite bra size? A seaaaa cup
  • I asked my girlfriend what her bra size is. "Oh," she said. "Thinking of getting me some for Christmas?"
    I said, "No. But I tried yours on earlier and it was too small."
  • I like my bra sizes like I like my wrestlers Triple H
  • How do you know when you should stop eating? When you start wearing the same bra size as your wife.
  • Bras come in sizes A, B, C, etc. So what's the biggest bra? The Zebra.
  • This girl in my class is so Asian she gets A's on everything... even on her bra size.
  • Real definition of Zebra from Blonde's perspective What is a Zebra?
    A Z-bra is 25 sizes bigger than an A-bra.
  • What's a Zebra? 26 sizes larger than an A bra.
  • How to find a dumb blonde's IQ Take bra size and divide it by the number of times they say awesome in a sentence.
    Stolen from my hot metals teacher.

Push Up Bra Jokes

Here is a list of funny push up bra jokes and even better push up bra puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • How is a push-up bra like a bag of chips? As soon as you open it, you realise it's half empty.
  • What does a push-up bra and a bag of chips have in common? When you open them, they're only half full.
  • What's the first ingredient in a push up bra? Start with two cups of lies.
  • What do you get when you push a female mathematician into a swamp? Algae bra
  • What does a weightlifting divorce attorney have in common with a good push-up bra? They both lift and separate.
  • Hey George. I just bought a push-up bra. Cool, thanks for the uplifting news.

Mermaid Bra Jokes

Here is a list of funny mermaid bra jokes and even better mermaid bra puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • What do math and mermaids have in common? They both have an alge-bra.
  • What does a mermaid wear to math class An algae-bra
    I'm not sorry
  • Why does the Little Mermaid wear a seashell bra? Because she outgrew her B shells.
  • what did the mermaid wear to the maths class? An "algae bra"
  • What does a Mermaid bring to math class? An algae-bra.
  • What kind of underwear does a math-obsessed mermaid wear? An algae bra.
  • Wat did the mermaid wear to her math exam? An algae-bra.
  • What did the mermaid wear to the math class? Algae-bra
    P.S not my own . Reposting someone's original from years ago. Kudos to him
  • What kind of bra did the Little Mermaid wear? An Algebra
    (Algae Bra)
  • Why was the mermaid embarrassed and crying in the classroom? She forgot her Algae-bra. Ha..

Bra Strap Jokes

Here is a list of funny bra strap jokes and even better bra strap puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • What do you get when you cut a bra in half? Two yamakas with chin straps.
  • If a bra is an over-the-shoulder-Boulder-holder, what do you call a jock strap? An under-the-b**...-nut-hut!
  • Masks are like bra. If the strap slipped and it is not at place, people keep pointing out
    and if you entirely forgot to wear one in public, people go on staring like h**....

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about bra can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of bra puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Ridiculous Bra Jokes to Spark Fun and Laughter

What funny jokes about bra you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean underwear jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make bra prank.

So I took off her shirt. Then she said, "Take off my skirt." I took off her skirt. "Take off my shoes." I took off her shoes. "Now take off my bra and p**...." and so I took them off.

Then she looked at me and said, "I don't want to catch you wearing my things ever again."

With a very seductive voice, a wife asked her husband, Have you ever seen $20 all crumpled up?

No said her husband. She gave him a little smile, unbuttoned the top three b**..., reached into her bra and pulled out a crumpled $20 note.
She then asked Have you ever seen $50 all crumpled up? No, I haven't he said with an anxious tone in his voice. She seductively unzipped her skirt and pulled out a crumpled $50 note.
Now she said. Have you ever seen $40,000 all crumpled up? No way! he panted, becoming even more excited,
She said Look in the garage.

What's the process of applying for a job at h**...?

They just give you a bra and say "Here, fill this out."

My girlfriend came home and told me to take off her shirt so I did

Then she told me to take off her skirt so I did. Then she told me to take off her bra and p**... so I did. Then she told me to never wear her things again

My sister asked me to remove her clothes.

So I took off her shirt.
Then she said, "Take off my skirt."
I took off her skirt."Take off my shoes."
I took off her shoes.
"Now take off my bra and p**...."
and so I took them off.
Then she looked at me and said, "I don't want to catch you wearing my things ever again."

So my wife said "take off my shirt".

So I did as she said and took off her shirt.
Then she said, "Take off my skirt." I continued and took off her skirt.
"Take off my shoes." Once again, I did as she said and I took off her shoes.
"Now my hose, bra, and p**...." And lastly, I took them off.
Then she looked at me and said, "I don't want to catch you wearing my things ever again."

A lady calls her butler into her room and says, "Jeeves, take off my dress"

He casually says, "Yes, Madam", and removes the dress. Then she says, "Jeeves, take off my underwear". Again, he says, "Yes, Madam" and removes the undergarment. She then says, "Jeeves, take off my bra". Again, with no hesitation he says, "Yes, Madam" and removes the bra. Then she says, "Now out of my sight! If I ever catch you wearing my clothes again, you're fired!"

My step-sister walked into my room one day and she says, "Hey, big brother... take off my shirt."

So I took off her shirt.
Then she says, "Take off my skirt..."
So I took off her skirt.
Then she says, "Take off my bra and p**......"
So I took off her bra and p**....
Then she says, "If I ever catch you wearing my clothes again, I'm telling mom and dad!"

I stared intensely as my neighbour removed the red dress, then the bra, then the silk underwear.

"Oo yeah," I whispered to myself, as I looked through my telescope, "you keep emptying that washing machine, baby."

Prince Harry and William must feel so awkward in a s**... club

Imagine having to put pictures of your gran into a stripper's bra

After playing racquetball at the gym, two guys hit the shower and were getting changed...

and the first guy was putting on a bra. The second guy looked surprised and asked "How long have you been wearing a bra?" The first guy answers "Ever since my wife found it under the bed".

Bench Bros...

Two guys are in the gym working on their bench pressing when a b**... coed comes up to the rack next to them and begins to do her workout. o**... turns to his spotter and says "hey you think that's a push up bra?" And his spotter says "nah brah, that's a squat"

Wife told her husband

A man's wife comes up to him and tells him, Take off my shirt. So he does.
She then tells him, Take off my skirt and high heels. So he does.
Then she tells him, Take off my bra and underwear. So he does.
Finally she tells him, I better never find you wearing my clothes again.

My secretary doesn't wear any bra or p**... to work.

But he types really well.

Judy entered a church

She was wearing a see through blouse and no bra.
"You can't come into this church dressed like that!" Exclaimed the priest.
"But I have a divine right!" Replied Judy.
"You have a divine left too, but you still can't come in dressed like that!"

I always wondered what the job application is like at h**....

Do they just give you a bra and say, "Here, fill this out?"

My girlfriend came home from work last night and immediately said, "Claud, take off my shirt."

So I took off her shirt. Then she said, "Take off my shoes." I took off her shoes. "Take off my skirt." I took off her skirt. "Now my hose, bra, and p**...." I took them off. Then she looked at me and said, "I don't want to catch you wearing my things ever again."

My Girlfriends Bra

I spent half an hour trying to take off my girlfriend's bra. I finally just gave up. Now, I am really wishing I wouldn't have tried it on.

I spent half an hour trying to take off my girlfriends bra...

I spent half an hour trying to take off my girlfriend's bra. I gave up at the end. I wish I had never tried it on in the first place.

Dave's wife tied him to the bed posts last night.

Dave's wife tied him to the bed posts last night. Unable to move, he could do nothing to stop her slowly stripping down to her bra and pants in front of him.
She knelt on the bed, between his thighs and said
"Ok big boy, what would you like me to take off next?"
Dave gulped: "My glasses, please."

Did you hear about the new bra they call the Sheepdog?

It rounds them up and points them in the right direction.

I just spent over a half hour trying to get my girlfriend's bra off...

Man I'll never try wearing that again

My girlfriend asked me to take off her clothes.

So I took off her shirt.
Then she said, "Take off my skirt."
I took off her skirt.
"Now take off my bra and p**...."
And so I took them off.
Then she looked at me and said, "I don't want to catch you wearing my things ever again."

A young man walks into a ladies clothing store...

"I need to buy my girlfriend some gloves, but I don't know what size her hands are."
The beautiful young employee presses her hands into his and says, "I'm a 'small'. Does that help?"
"Oh yeah," he says. "You're hands are the exact same size as hers."
"Do you need anything else?" the young girl asks him.
"Now that you mention it, she also needs a bra and p**...."

I tripped over my sister's bra the other day

It was b**... trap

A bra, a battery, and a set of jumper cables walk into a bar...

The battery and cables sit down at a table while the bra approaches the bartender.
Bra says, "Three pints, please."
Bartender replies, "I'm not serving you."
The bra asks why not.
Bartender answers, "Because you're clearly off your t**... and your friends look like they're about to start something."

A girl looked at me funny last night as I struggled to take her bra off...

She was probably wondering why I had it on in the first place.

A man in a bra.

A man, shocked by how his buddy is dressed, asks him, How long have you been wearing that bra? The friend replies, Ever since my wife found it in the glove compartment.

s**... time with my girlfriend

So, me and my girlfriend are making out.
She says, "take off my shirt!"
I took off her shirt.
She then says, "take off my skirt."
I took off her skirt.
She also says "take off my shoes!"
I took off her shoes.
Finally, she says "take off my bra and p**...!"
I took off her bra and p**....
She then looks at me and says "I don't wanna catch you wearing my things ever again!"

My wife came into the bedroom & said "Take off my bra"......

So I took her bra off.
She then said "Take off my p**..."
So I took her p**... off.
She then said "Stop wearing my underwear!!"

I walked into my sisters room and tripped on a bra...

It was a booby trap!
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^Stolen ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^from ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^The ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^Last ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^Of ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^us

My step-sister walked into my room one day and

My step-sister walked into my room one day and she says, "Hey, big brother... take off my shirt."
So I took off her shirt.

Then she says, "Take off my skirt..."

So I took off her skirt.

Then she says, "Take off my bra and p**......"

So I took off her bra and p**....

Then she says, "If I ever catch you wearing my clothes again, I'm telling mom and dad!"

I went to go apply for a job at h**... today

They just handed me a bra and said Here fill this out

She said "undress me with your words"

So I replied by saying "there's a spider in your bra".

A middle aged lady decides to revamp her s**... life with her husband.

She asks her friends what she should do and the concensus is to get some s**... l**... and surprise him. So she goes out and buys a lacy bra and crotchless p**.... That night when her husband is in bed watching TV she appears in the doorway wearing the l**... and says 'hey big boy! Fancy some of this?', he looks over casually, his eyes widen, he sits bolt upright in the bed and shouts 'fuck no! Look what it did to your p**...!'.

A runner walks into a bar

An ultra runner jogs into a bar and orders a beer. She reaches into her sweaty sports bra and pulls out a sweaty crumpled $5 bill to pay. The bartender gingerly picks up the damp bill with a pair of tongs and dumps it in a bucket. "You realize every time I get money with b**... fluids on them I have to report it to the government," the bartender grumbles. "It's g**... income."

In the locker room after the game...

The guys have finished playing, have showered, and are getting dressed. Dennis pulls out a black lace bra and p**... and starts to put them on.
His team mates begin laughing, and making fun of him. The coach asks, "Hey, Dennis! Since when did you start wearing women's underwear?"
Dennis replies, "Since my wife found them under the passenger seat of my car."

How did the cops catch the bra thief?

They set a booby trap.

Two autocorrecting iPhones walk into a bear

Bard*
BRA*
BOAR*
JESUS %#$&ING CHRISTINA AGUILERA

I was woken late last night about 3am

By my next door neighbor in a very revealing negligee, bra, thongs and high heel boots, and asking to borrow a cup of sugar.
I said, f**... off dave, I've got work in the morning'.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra...

He gets beaten by the woman wearing it as that's not how dyslexia works

A dslexic man walked into a bra.

His wife's washing was hanging out to dry and he wasn't looking where he was going. The man's dyslexia was admittedly pretty irrelevant to the event.

What did the Wonderbra say to the regular bra?

Do you even lift?

My wife told me to take off her shirt

I took off her shirt. Then she said, "Take off my skirt." I took off her skirt off. "Take off my shoes" I took off her shoes. "Now my stockings, bra, and p**...!" I took all of them off. Then she looks at me and said, "I dont want to catch you wearing my things ever again!"

What did the bra say to the hat at the end of the undergarment party?

You go on ahead, I'll give these two a lift.

Bra Sazes

Have u ever wondered why A, B, C, D, DD, E, F, G, and H are the letters used to define bra sizes but couldn't figure out what the letters stood for? Well its time you became informed!

(A) Almost b**....
(B) Barely there.
(C) Can't Complain!
(D) Dang!
(DD) Double Dang!
(E) Enormous!
(F) Fake.
(G) Get a Reduction.
(H) Help me, I've fallen and I can't get up!!!

I was just eating cashews and one of them fell into my bra.

Is it still a cashew or is it a chestnut now?

When he gently removed her bra, she whispered

why were you wearing my bra?

How do you catch a bra?

With a booby trap!

Dyslexic man walks into a bra

Whole joke in title! New era of convenience! In mother Russia, joke laughs at you!
***Bonus***, since you came in here anyway:
Doc, I can't stop singing the 'Green Green Grass of Home'. He said: 'That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome'. 'Is it common?'I asked. 'It's not unusual' he replied.

I tripped over my wife's bra

She set a b**... trap

A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

But they didn't serve milk

What do you call a bra that tightens the more you try to take it off?

A booby trap!

A bra was talking to a hat. The bra said "You go on ahead...

I've gotta give these two a lift."

Her: Undress me with your words.

Me: There's a spider in your bra.

jokes about bra

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these bra jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.