Boxer Jokes
126 boxer jokes and hilarious boxer puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about boxer that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Check out this hilarious collection of jokes about boxer shorts, MMA fighters, Muhammad Ali, and fencers! Perfect for a night of laughs with friends, these jokes will keep everyone in stitches.
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Funniest Boxer Short Jokes
Short boxer jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The boxer humour may include short boxing match jokes also.
- I always thought the hole in boxer briefs was a messy idea... until I learned it goes in the front.
- I was sitting on the edge of the bed, pulling my boxers off when... ...my wife said, "You spoil those dogs."
- A boxer was having trouble sleeping. He goes to the doctor.
Doctor asks "Have you tried counting sheep?
Boxer replies "I have but every time I get to the count of eight, I stand up. - "What are your dogs names ?" "Calvin and Klein"
"Like the underwear?"
"They are boxers." - I'm currently on a restaurant date with a female boxer. She's going for the ribs.
I might try a duck. - Did you hear that Mike Tyson just got a job at Amazon? He just really wanted to be a professional boxer again.
- Did you hear about that Feminist boxer who lost all her matches?... ... She blames it on her rights...
- I was sat on the side of the bed last night pulling off my boxers.... The wife said you're too good to those dogs
- A friend of mine had a pet boxer. Unlike a dog, whenever the doorbell rang he walked over to the corner and sat down.
- Who's the greatest boxer of all time? Jim Jones, he knocked out 900 people with one punch.
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Boxer One Liners
Which boxer one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with boxer? I can suggest the ones about fighter and bodybuilder.
- Do 90-year-old men wear boxers or briefs? Depends.
- Why did Conor McGregor get a Chihuahua? He wasn't ready for a Boxer.
- Did you hear about that boxer who adopted a child from Asia? It's Mike's Thai Son.
- I went on a date last night. She asked me "Boxers or briefs?" "Depends."
- Why does Mike Tyson refuse to buy playstation ? Because he is an x-boxer
- What do Dracula's girlfriend and a boxer have in common? They both go down for the Count
- What do you call a Chinese boxer? Pun Ching.
- What do you call a boxer who vacuums? Mike Dyson
- Why do MMA fighters wear skin tight shorts? Cause otherwise, they'd be boxers!!!
- What do you call the monobrow of a boxer? A punchline.
- Why wouldn't JFK be a good boxer? He can't take a shot to the head....
Too soon? - Why did the dog run into the corner every time the door bell rang? because he is a Boxer
- Every time my doorbell rings my dog stands in the corner He's a boxer
- Have you met the burka boxer? Apparently hijabs.
- What do boxers carry their underwear in? A briefcase
Boxer Briefs Jokes
Here is a list of funny boxer briefs jokes and even better boxer briefs puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Growing up, I always wanted to be a prize fighter, or a lawyer. Everyone would ask me, boxers or briefs?
- They asked if I wear boxers or briefs.... Depends
- Getting old You know you are getting old when you are asked Boxers or Briefs?
And you answer…….
Depends!! - I have a great deal of very tight boxer briefs. I buy them in XS.
- Anyone remember the Boxer rebellion? Thank god it was only for a brief moment.
- There are two old men at a nursing home One of them turns to the other and asks "Do you wear boxers or briefs?"
The other man responds "Depends" - What sort of undergarments does a succinct pugilist wear? Boxer briefs!
- Do old cowboys wear boxers or briefs? Depends.
- What kind of underwear does Trump wear? Boxers. He hates briefs.
- Cop Pursuit Man in boxers leads police on brief chase
Boxer Dog Jokes
Here is a list of funny boxer dog jokes and even better boxer dog puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- boxers I was in my room the other day pulling off my boxers when my mum walked in and said "you spoil them dogs you do".
- A 6 year old asks what kind of dog is that? I tell him it's a boxer
And the 6 year old replies with, yeaaa he looks like he got punched. - I was pulling my boxers off in bed the other day God I love those dogs
- Went up to bed last night and started pulling off my boxers. My wife said "You really spoil those dogs".
-Jed Stone. - My friend's dog eats anything and everything. She told me that he was a bottomless Pit...I dunno. He looks more like a Boxer to me.
- Why didn't the dog want to play football? It was a boxer!
- A boxer (dog) wrote a book It was a very short tale
Professional Boxer Jokes
Here is a list of funny professional boxer jokes and even better professional boxer puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I'm always extra nice to the guy who used to deliver my mail. I'd hate to get into a fist fight with an ex-professional mail boxer.
- I heard the professional boxers are among the highest paid people in the world Apparently my bosses at Amazon didn't get the memo
- I was a professional boxer. Then I picked up Muay Thai just for kicks.
- what do professional boxers and sugary candies have in common? they both make you lose your teeth
- In honor of Mole Day: Why did the mole keep getting confused for a professional boxer? He was always making holey fields.
- A professional boxer has to fight a rookie. Right before the match begins, the rookie exclaims ''I think I can take that guy blindfolded!'' His coach replies "But what if he is not blindfolded?"
- I am professional boxer Floyd Mayweather. AMA
Boxer Shorts Jokes
Here is a list of funny boxer shorts jokes and even better boxer shorts puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Don't buy Ukrainian boxer shorts... ...Chernobyl fallout.
(*has to be read in a British accent*) - Why don't we advertise on the back of boxer shorts in the heights? Cause no one thinks you look cool.
- Why don't Soviets wear boxer shorts? Because Chernobyl fall out
- On the front of my boxer shorts it reads handle with care I have a fragile package.
- Got a neighbor who's a real patriot? Always flying the flag? Sneak out late at night and replace it with a large pair of boxer shorts.
- Have you heard about the collapse of the boxer shorts industry? apparently it was quite brief.
- It was so hard getting out of bed this morning Thank god for elastic boxer shorts
Amusing & Witty Boxer Jokes for Laughter-Filled Fun
What funny jokes about boxer you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean fencer jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make boxer pranks.
Why couldn't JFK be a boxer?
He couldn't take shots to the head.
I used to be the 2nd best boxer in North America...
I boxed in over 100 matches and always came 2nd
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Triplets
There are triplets in a mothers w**..., talking about what they want to do when they grow up.
The first triplet says "When I grow up, I will be an electrician, because it's too dark in here."
The second triplet says "When I grow up, I will be a plumber, because it's too wet in here."
The third triplet says, "When I grow up I want to be a boxer, so that I can beat up that bald guy who comes in here and spits on us all the time!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My grandad always used to say to me that the best part of fighting is the make-up s**....
Which would probably explain his short lived career as a boxer.
"What are you doing?" asked my wife as she walked in on me and our children sitting around the table.
"I'm just showing them these old photos from when I used to be a Boxer" I said, showing off.
"If you turn them sideways kids, it looks like your Dad's standing up"
A former boxer decided to go into the writing business
There is no punchline.
A Mexican immigrant was asked what he does for a living.
"I am a professional boxer."
"A professional boxer?"
"Yes, yes. Everyone in my family is a professional boxer.
We box onions, linens, tomatoes..."
Giving credit where credit's due: This joke was taken from a bit done by Gabriel Iglesias on his show "Stand-Up Revolution".
They say that you should never bring your work home with you.
Especially if you're a boxer.
Which boxer did Darth Vader put his money on in the fight?
The Thai fighter
What Do You Call A Gay Boxer?
"Fruit Punch".
I'm sorry.
I could've been a boxer, like my father.
He could've been one too
Source: Simon Munnery
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you get when you mix a boxer and c**...?
A punchline
Who was the best boxer of all time?
Jim Jones, I heard he took out 909 people with one punch.
Ali was great but he was not the greatest...
The best boxer that ever lived was reverend Jim Jones. He killed over 900 people with one punch!
What do you get if you cross a Boxer and a Painter?
Mohammed Dali
Letter to God
Dear God,
Last week, you took my favorite boxer; Muhammed Ali.
Today, you took my favorite hockey player; Gordie Howe.
I just want to let you know that my favorite candidate is Donald Trump.
It's the 2016 Olympics
And Chris Brown is still the most famous female boxer
Why didnt Jesus become a boxer?
Crosses killed him.
A man in a cemetery sees a couple laughing over the tomb of a famous boxer
A bit taken back by the inappropriateness, the man approaches the couple who point to the boxer's epitaph:
"You can stop counting, I'm not getting up"
What's the difference between a reliable employee and an angry boxer?
One is punctual, the other will punch you all.
My friend claims that he is a really good boxer.
He doesn't strike me as one.
What kind of boxer spits on their opponents face?
A beat boxer
Did you hear about the boxer who became a comedian
I hear he has a great punchline
Why aren't the best boxers competing in the olympics?
Because they're working in warehouses.
A bad boxer
During the fight, the boxer swiped the air furiously, but could not hit his opponent.
"How am I doing?" he asked the coach at the end of the round.
"Well, if you keep this up," replied the coach, "he might feel the wind and catch a cold."
I'm currently dating a boxer, but I'm not sure if she's my type.
I think she needs to let her guard down.
What division does a blacksmith boxer compete in?
Smelterweight.
My Grandpa was a retired Boxer.
He had trouble sleeping. He tried counting sheep but everytime he got to 10 he got up.
What martial art does a vegan kick boxer specialize in?
To-fu
A girl had the choice of going out with either a fencer or a boxer.
The fencer was really kind and gentle, while the boxer seemed rowdy. In the end, she chose to go out with the boxer.
I asked her, "Why did you choose the boxer? The fencer seemed really nice."
She responded, " I don't know, the fencer just seemed rapier."
When I was a boxer, they called me "The Artist"
because I spent most of my time on the canvas.
A boxer loses his sight in a freak accident.
Not being able to compete again, all he can do now is training with his loyal training partner and hitting the bag. Since he can't see, he is required to remember and move only a certain amount of steps (both forward and backwards) to keep the distance. Suddenly his partner stops the session and the boxer asks why they stopped. His partner says: we stopped because you messed up the punch line.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Did you know h**... was a boxer before he started WW2?
He had a mean r**... hook.
Once upon a time, there was a boxer who always wins every single match...
When fans asked him what's his secret, he would just say, "I imagine there's a line on my opponent's face and I hit that line,". On his 100th boxing match, the whole world was watching. He lost. It was his first loss ever in his career. Fans again wondered so he was interviewed. A reported asked how come he lost this game. "Well, I carefully looked at the opponents face," he said, "and there's no punch line".
Did you hear about the boxer who fought his own clone?
The resemblance was striking.
A famous British boxer threw an object at me.
It turned out to be a mere can!
But what he really wants ...
While my mother was pregnant with me, my parents warned my three-year-old brother not to get his heart set on either a brother or a sister, as they didn't know what I would be. He seemed to understand but added this caveat: "Well, if it's a dog, I hope it's a Boxer".
Why was the boxer fired from his job?
He never punched out
A strong boxer
has a foam board to practice on.
He punches it 10,15,20 times in a row, so hard that each punch makes a crater in the foam.
After he finishes practice, he turns to an imaginary audience, shows them the board, and tells them
"here's the punchline"
What do you call a flatulent boxer?
Gassius Clay
sorry
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
They call someone who wears boxer shorts a boxer, they call someone who wears swim shorts a swimmer, but what do you call someone who doesn't wear any shorts at all?
A s**....
Did you hear the one about the paraplegic boxer?
He really rolls with the punches
Did you hear about Salvador Dali's brother who was a really good boxer?
His name was Muhamma
Boxers or Briefs, Mr. President?
In 1992 while being interviewed by MTV, Bill Clinton was asked if he wore boxers or briefs? Clinton replied, "Boxers"
In 2008 US magazine asked Obama, "Boxers or briefs"? Obama declined to answer the question.
Last week AARP asked Joe Biden, "Boxers or briefs"? Biden responded, "Depends".
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
a man walks into a bar and shouts
"who thinks he's badass enough and can beat me in an open fight?"
"I do", answers a man from the corner, 7 feet long, well muscled and looks like a professional boxer or something
Our man looks at him, then turns to the rest and shouts
"who thinks he's badass enough and can beat us two in an open fight?"
A little known fact about Jim Jones is that he was an aspiring boxer
He quit the sport after taking out 900 people with one punch
I wish more boxers could be on this sub….
They always have the best *punch* lines.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
As a boxer I'm tired of hearing and reading vaccine jokes...
If I hear another, I'm going to give someone a jab!
What do you call a boxer who enjoys landscape gardening in his spare time?
Manny Patio
Why did the boxer cover up his battle scar?
He didn't want to reveal the punchline.
What do you call a champion boxer with flatulence?
Gaseous Clay
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why did the boxers agree to have their match in the bathroom?
Because that's where the s**... goes down.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why do you hire a boxer when you are constipated ?
Cause he beats the s**... out of you.
How did the Muslim boxer beat the other boxer?
With a Highjab
