Bowling Ball Jokes

Yo momma's like a bowling ball. She gets picked up, fingered, thrown in the gutter, and she still comes back for more.

Yo ma's like a bowling ball, she gets picked up, fingered, thrown in the gutter, and comes back for more.

A blonde man marries his girlfriend who is also blonde.

It's their first honeymoon night and the man doesn't quite know what to do. He calls his dad, who says, "Son, you take the hardest thing you got and you put it where she goes to the bathroom." The newlywed thanks his father, hangs up the phone, and places his bowling ball in the toilet.

Yo Momma's a bowling ball.
She is round and heavy, men stick three fingers into her and push her in the gutter.
Then she comes rolling back for more.

Your mama so fat, that she can use herself as a bowling ball and get 10 strikes in all of the lanes!

What's the difference between a bowling ball and a blonde? You can only fit three fingers inside a bowling ball!

Jesus

My wife just asked, "What was Jesus' full name?"
So I dropped a bowling ball on her foot.

Today my girlfriend told me to stick something hard where she pees.

So I threw a bowling ball in her toilet.

My Cousin's Wedding Night

On my cousin's wedding night he approached our grandfather and asked, "Pap, you and gram have been married for 56 years. Can you give me any advice on my wedding night?"
My grandfather responded, "take the hardest thing you got and put it where she pees."
My cousin thought for a moment and then asked, "why would I put my bowling ball in the toilet?"

What's the only difference between a p**... and a bowling ball?

I can only fit 3 fingers in a bowling ball

What does a bowling ball and your mom have in common?

They both get picked up, fingered, thrown in the gutter, and then come back for more.

Your mom is like a bowling ball

she gets picked up, fingered, thrown down a dark alley, and she always comes back for more.

Why is OP's mum like a bowling ball?

Because she gets picked up, fingered and thrown down an alley then still comes back for more.

I'm absolutely awful at bowling

The only way I ever break 3 digits is if my fingers get stuck in the ball.

What's the only difference between a p**... and a bowling ball?

If I want to fill all 3 of the p**...'s holes, it's extra.

My aunt lost a foot when someone dropped a bowling ball on her

Does she walk with a limp?
No, she's just a bit shorter.

Why do Babies have the soft spot on the top of their heads?

So that if there is a fire in the hospital, the nurses can carry them out 3 to each hand like a bowling ball.

My friend told me that onions were the only things that could make him cry

so I threw a bowling ball at him to prove him wrong

I got a flat tire recently...

I was lucky enough to have spotted it before I was able to drive off to my local bowling alley. Unfortunately for me, I didn't have any extra tires on me, nor was I willing to go to my local auto shop and get one.
Fortunately, I did have the bowling ball and 10 pins I was planning on bringing with me, so all I had to do was knock down 9 pins with the bowling ball, and then knock down the last one to get a spare.

A bowling ball and a black man fall out of a tree at the same time and altitude, what hits the ground first?

The bowling ball.
the black man stops at the neck.

Your mom is like a bowling ball.

She's round, heavy, gets picked up, fingered in three holes, tossed in the gutter and she still comes back for more.

That's not a bowling ball, dad.

This weekend me and my dad were out bowling, you see. He gets his shoes on, and picks his ball from the rack. A nice, shiny, pinkish purple ball. He throws it down the lane, and we can't find it. The thing is gone. We look for at least an hour for this ball, but it's vanished. In the car on the way home (for automotive reasons) we pull into a gas station. My dad perks up, face scrunching in focus, and he says: "there's the ball!"
I said: "Dad, that's a short fat man buying a granola bag."

After many faithful years as a Christian, John's dedication finally paid off as he found himself the girl of his dreams.

At the wedding he walks over to his best friend for advice.
"Hey man! What is it that I'm supposed to do when I get her all alone after the wedding?"
"Ah, that's simple. You just take your most prized-possession and stick it in where she pees."
"Ah! Thanks dude!"
"No problem!"
Later that night, John took his bowling ball and put it in the toilet.

I asked my wife what Jesus's full name was and she said she didn't remember...

till I dropped a bowling ball on her foot.

After a two year study, the National Science Foundation announced the following results on America's ball-related recreational preferences:

1. The sport of choice for unemployed or incarcerated people is basketball.

2. The sport of choice for maintenance level employees is bowling.

3. The sport of choice for blue-collar workers is football.

4. The sport of choice for supervisors is baseball.

5. The sport of choice for middle management is tennis.

6. The sport of choice for corporate officers is golf.

Conclusion: The higher you rise in the corporate structure, the smaller your b**... become.

Once I won.....

Once I won the game, I threw the ball into the crowd, but apparently that's frowned upon when playing bowling.

The Corporate Ladder

A recent study in USA have found an interesting relationship between a man social status and the sport he watches
1. The sport of choice for the urban poor is BASKETBALL
2. The sport of choice for maintenance level employee is BOWLING
3. The sport of choice for front line workers is American FOOTBALL
4. The sport of choice for supervisors is BASEBALL
5. The sport of Choice for middle management is TENNIS
6. the sport of Choice for corporate Officers is GOLF
CONCLUSION: The Higher you are in the corporate structure, the smaller your b**... become

What's the difference between a bowling ball & my mother-in-law?

The bowling ball doesn't have a beard.

After facing down the sadistic bowling ball who just finished killing his entire family, the last remaining bowling pin had one final, desperate plea as the ball menacingly approached him...

"Spare me."

I've had constipation for 3 months

Never been to the doctors in years, but took myself there as not had a number 2 in a long time.
Doc says "what have you been eating"?
I said well doc I've been eating snooker b**...!!
What?? Snooker b**... Charlie??
Yes doc, in the morning I have 3 reds a pink, bowl porridge and a nice cup of tea.
Lunch is a sandwich a black, 2 reds and a yellow washed down with another cup of tea.
For dinner I have a nice steak, 4 reds 2 blues 1 brown again washed down with a nice cup of tea.
Doc said "hey Charlie I know where you're going wrong, you ain't eating enough greens!!"

Given that the US has now shot down three balloons (or suspected balloons) this week....

Whoever is flying the Goodyear blimp at the super bowl tonight had better have b**... of steel.