Bowel Jokes
75 bowel jokes and hilarious bowel puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about bowel that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
This article takes a light-hearted look at Irritable Bowel Syndrome and the many issues that comes with it. It will explore topics such as bowel obstructions, bowel prep, bowel surgery, bladder issues and the joys of suppositories. It provides some laughs for IBS sufferers and non-sufferers alike.
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Funniest Bowel Short Jokes
Short bowel jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The bowel humour may include short toilet bowl jokes also.
- I accidentally swallowed a handful of scrabble tiles... My next bowel movement could spell disaster.
- A really good bowel movement may not be the absolute greatest thing in the world But it's a solid #2.
- I'm writing a book about my time growing up as a shy young boy with irritable bowel syndrome... ... i've decided to call it 'Diarrhoea Of A Wimpy Kid'
- Why do people with irritable bowel syndrome have a hard time making decisions? They can't trust their gut
- I got hungry while playing scrabble, so I ate all of the pieces Tomorrows bowel movement could spell trouble
- "I've been having really painful bowel movements," I told my doctor. "How long?" he asked.
"I can't be sure," I replied. "It's not like I measure them." - A man goes to an astrologer and then to a doctor for advice because he has trouble in performing bowel movements. Both of them said the same thing..... "Uranus is not in the right position".
- What's the best thing about playing Wordle on the toilet? You can eliminate vowels and your bowels at the same time.
- What happened to the Professional Writer who had bowel surgery? He ended up with a semi-colon.
- A guy tells his doctor "I have a good pee every morning at 7.. "And a good bowel movement at 8." Doctor says "OK so what's the trouble?" Man says "I don't get out of bed till 9!"
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Bowel One Liners
Which bowel one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with bowel? I can suggest the ones about bladder and stool.
- What part of your body shouldn't move while dancing? Your bowels!
- My dad suffers from bowel incontinence, and so do I ... It runs in my jeans.
- I have a nice solid bowel movement every morning at 6AM. Problem is... I wake up at 7.
- What do you call a linguist's diarrhea? The great bowel shift.
- My doctor asked me to keep track of my bowel movements, I said how? He said keep a log
- What do you call it when your intestines start protesting? A bowel movement.
- After a Week of Diarrhea... I would rate today's bowel movement a sold 2.
- Hereditary Irritable Bowel Syndrome Runs in the family.
- What do you call a group of anuses fighting for their rights? A bowel movement
- Irritable Bowel Syndrome is genetic. It runs in your jeans.
- What did Pat Sajak say when he had his intestines removed? "I'd like to buy a bowel."
- What kind of Raspberry dishes do you eat to irritate your bowel? Raspberry tart
- Welcome to the Proctology Association's Super Bowel Forum and After-Party.
- I don't know who Holly was But I decked the halls with her bowels like everyone said.
- Pain is temporary, pride is forever. Does not apply to irritable bowel syndrome.
Bowel Movement Jokes
Here is a list of funny bowel movement jokes and even better bowel movement puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I just bragged about my bowel movement and my father scolded me for being conceited... ...now I feel empty inside.
- Doctor's Office Visit The doctor asked me how my bowel movements have been lately, I told him very dark. He asked me to describe so I said, "every time i look into the bowl, it spells out 'DIE'"
- I swallowed some scrabble tiles yesterday... My next bowel movement could spell disaster!
Haven't seen this in a while, thought I'd repost - A recently discovered European WWII era manuscript tells the story of a young Jewish girl who often had liquidy bowel movements. It's called *"The Diarrhea of Anne Frank."*
- A man goes to the doctor and announces, "Doctor! I have a bowel movement every morning at 7:00" "That's perfectly healthy", replies the doctor.
"But I wake up at 7:30!" - Help me doctor, I have a bowel movement every morning at 7! Doctor: Well that's good, it means you're healthy.
Man: You'd think so, but I don't wake up until 8am! - What movement did the cholera outbreak in 1854's London cause? The bowel movement.
- dreaming again "Please help me doctor, I have a bowel movement every morning at 7!"
"But that is a very healthy thing, Mr. Richards!"
"It would be, if I didn't usually wake up at 8:30!" - What was Mozart's first movement? His bowels.
- Doctor, I need help. I have a bowel movement everyday at 7. But that's very health, Mr Johnson.
It would be but I don't wake up until 8
Irritable Bowel Jokes
Here is a list of funny irritable bowel jokes and even better irritable bowel puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Worst Dad Joke of the Day? You know what IBS is, right? Irritable Bowel Syndrome. What I've got is worse, IWS, Irritable Wife Syndrome. And that kids is why Dad is sleeping on the couch tonight.
- Told my wife that the doctor thinks I have irritable vowel syndrome. She said, "I think you mean 'bowel'." I said, "Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyybeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee."
- What's a good name for a therapy book on coping with irritable bowel syndrome?
- I want to start an irritable bowel support group called f**... matters


Howlingly Hilarious Bowel Jokes for All Ages to Enjoy
What funny jokes about bowel you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean bowls jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make bowel pranks.
A man goes into the doctor...
The doctor asks the man what his issue is.
Man: "Doc, i have this problem where i'm having bowel movements at 6 a.m."
Doctor: "That's great! You're regular!"
Man: "No it's not, i don't get up until 7 a.m."
A woman goes to the doctor
A woman goes to the doctor one day and tells him she's been having some stomach pains. In reply the doctor takes some samples and tells the woman to come back a week later when the results are in. So a week later the woman goes to the doctor and asks "So what's wrong with me?", "well..." says the doctor "in 6 months from now you be changing diapers.", in astonishment the woman exclaims "wow, I'm pregnant?", "No..." says the doctor "you have bowel cancer."
A woman goes to the doctor because her stomach has been slowly swelling.
The doctor examines her and says "Expect more swelling and buy some nappies (diapers)."
"Why?" asks the woman. "Am I pregnant?"
"No, you've got bowel cancer."
I've recently had severe bowel incontinence, so I decided to consult my doctor before starting up a daily powerwalking routine...
When I asked how my condition will affect my walks, my doctor responded, "Nothing severe, but you never know when the walks will turn into the runs."
I went to the Doctors today for a checkup
He told me that I had one of the best digestive systems he'd ever seen.
So today I'm celebrating superb bowel sunday.
A woman goes to the doctors complaining of stomach cramps...
She gets sent off for some test and comes back a week later.
"Well, I hope you're ready for endless sleepless nights of crying and changing dirty diapers!" the doc says.
"Wow, you mean I'm pregnant?" the woman replies thrilled.
"No, you've got bowel cancer."
What do you call going Doctor to Doctor...
What do you call going Doctor to Doctor to figure out what your inflammatory bowel disease is called?
A Game of Crohn's.
When do people have unhappy bowel movements?
On sad-t**...-days.
A woman goes to the doctor
A woman goes to the doctor complaining of abdominal pains. After a series of tests, the doctor walks back in and says to the lady, "Well, hope you don't mind changing diapers!"
Stunned, she replies, "Oh my God I'm pregnant? I can't be pregnant!"
The doctor looks at her and says, "No, you have bowel cancer"
A woman visits the doctor because she's been suffering from some abdominal pains and suspects she may be pregnant.
After he finishes examining her, the doctor comes out to see her and says, "Well, I hope you like changing diapers."
The woman replies, "Oh my God! Am I pregnant, am I pregnant!?"
The doctor says, "No, you've got bowel cancer."
I've heard that couples who are close sometimes share pictures of their bowel movements
Turns out she doesn't like my s**...-posting.
Everyone keeps talking about Saudi Arabia and MBS
I get it, Mutilated Bowel Syndrome is bad.
A woman visits the doctor as she has some strange symptoms and suspects she may be pregnant.
After her examination, the doctor comes out to see her: "Well, I hope your husband likes changing diapers".
She replies: "Oh my god am I pregnant, am I pregnant!?"
To which he responds: "No, you've got bowel cancer."
TIL that Austrian physicist Erwin Schrodinger suffered from a debilitating bowel condition that would often result in him soiling himself unexpectedly.
However, it was impossible for him to tell when he had had an accident, and lived in a perpetual state of both being soiled and unsoiled simultaneously.
This became known as Schrodinger's s**....
Three old men are talking about their aches, pains and b**... functions.
The 70 year old man says, "I have this problem. I wake up every morning at seven and it takes me twenty minutes to pee." The 80 year old man says, "My case is worse. I get up at eight and I sit there and grunt and groan for half an hour before I finally have a bowel movement." The 90 year old man says, "At seven I pee like a horse, and at eight I c**... like a cow." "So what's your problem?" ask the others. "I don't wake up until nine!"
A guy goes to the doctor with bowel problems
"Doc. My b**... just ain't right the past few days." he says.
"Alright," says the doctor.
"Pull your pants down and tell me where it's hurting exactly."
The guy does so, points and says,
"It's particularly painful near the entrance here."
The doctor is taken back and says,
"Well... I believe it is hurting because you just called it the entrance"
Three old men sitting on a park bench…
Man #1: I wish I can sleep through the night, I get up every 2 hours to pee.
Man #2: You think that's bad? I'm constipated and haven't had a bowel movement in a week.
Man #3: You think you guys have problems? I sleep throughout the night and every morning at 7:30 I empty my bladder and have a big bowel movement.
The other two men look confused…How's that a problem? They ask.
Man #3: I don't get up until 8:00am…
A man is in an emergency room complaining of severe stomach pains and bowel trouble. The physician says that the patient will need a r**... exam.
The doctor positions the patient on the bed on his side and puts on a latex glove.
As he lubes up his glove, he says, "Don't get excited and move too much like last time, Peter"
The patient says, "My name isn't Peter"
The doctor says, "Mine is"
Maurice is 70 years old and makes an appointment to see his doctor. His doctor asks him a few questions.
His doctor asks him a few questions: "Do you have any problems urinating?"
Maurice replies "No, Doctor. It's very regular, every morning at 7am."
"And what about your bowel movements?"
Maurice replies "They're fine also, Doctor. Every morning at 8am."
"So then why did you come to see me?"
"I don't wake up until 9am"
A woman sees her doctor about ongoing abdominal pain and cramps.
She's nervous during the examination, fearing that she may be pregnant. The doctor brings back her test results and says, "It looks like you'll have to get used to changing diapers from now on."
"Oh my god, I'm pregnant?" she asks, nearly in tears. "Am I pregnant?"
The doctor replies, "No, you have bowel cancer."

