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Bourbon Jokes

42 bourbon jokes and hilarious bourbon puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about bourbon that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Laugh out loud with these hilarious bourbon jokes! From scruffy bourbon biscuit puns to witty quips about taking a sip of brandy, there's something for everyone. So grab a glass, sit back, and get ready for a good time!

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Popular Bourbon Short Jokes

Short bourbon jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The bourbon humour may include short burg jokes also.

  1. A ham sandwich walks into a bar. Sits down.
    The bartender comes over and the ham sandwich says:
    > I'd like a triple of bourbon, neat.
    Bartender says:
    > I'm sorry, we don't serve food here.
  2. I guess I've cut back on my drinking... Time was, I'd buy a half gallon of bourbon and get drunk four times. Now I buy a half gallon and just get drunk twice.
  3. Why is it you can take a shot of bourbon and still drive, but can't after you've had another? Because it's two whiskey.
  4. What do you get when you cross Van Gogh with George Thorogood? One bourbon
    One scotch
    And one ear
  5. I like my bourbon the way the Chinese like their women... 11 years old and mixed up with coke.
  6. I thought my new ADHD meds would help my drinking and it works. Instead of a half dozen glasses of bourbon with only a sip or two drunk from them, I actually finish them all.
  7. I told my grand kids that I never want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and fluids from a bottle... So they unplugged my computer and threw out my bourbon..
  8. The fire service is attending to a man who is trapped after falling into a vat of bourbon at the Jim Beam factory. Although, he is said to be in good spirits.
  9. Apparently getting into the bourbon industry is quite the gamble. I heard it's whiskey business.
  10. A man in Kentucky mixed together sweet tea, citrus juice and bourbon at a party You were expecting a punch line weren't you?

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Bourbon One Liners

Which bourbon one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with bourbon? I can suggest the ones about booze and bard.

  1. Why does a sensible man not order a double bourbon? Because it's two whisky.
  2. I like my bourbon the way I like my women... Eighteen years old and full of coke.
  3. Why does bourbon come in fifths? Because you need it when you're too tense.
  4. How do Gorons take their bourbon? On the rocks
  5. Remember, Chemically Speaking Bourbon *is* a solution
  6. Jesus walked on water... And I can't even stand up on good bourbon.
  7. Why is the French Revolution just like Prohibition? They both got rid of Bourbon!
  8. I was going to start a bourbon company but I heard it's whiskey business...
  9. A blind man walks into a bar He orders a bourbon.

Bourbon joke, A blind man walks into a bar

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about bourbon can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of bourbon puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Howlingly Hilarious Bourbon Jokes for All Ages to Enjoy

What funny jokes about bourbon you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean bung jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make bourbon prank.

A man wanted to teach his sons the evils of alcohol

So he takes out two glasses. Fills one with bourbon and one with water.
He puts A worm in the bourbon and a worm in the water. Worm in the water lives, worm in the bourbon dies.
He turns to his son and say "now what does that teach you about the evils of alcohol?"
His son thought about it for a second and says "well if I drink bourbon I won't get worms"
-my dad tells this one to at least one person every time he goes into a liquor store-

A real cowboy?

An old cowboys goes into a bar, sits down and orders a drink. As he sits there sipping his bourbon, a young lady sits down next to him. She turns to the cowboys and asks "Are you a real cowboy?".
He replies "Well, I've spent my whole life on the ranch, herding horses, mending fences and branding cattle, so I guess I am".
She says "That's cool. I'm a lesbian. I spend my whole day thinking about women. As soon as I get up in the morning I think about women. When I shower or watch TV, everything seems to make me think of women".
The young lady finishes her drink and leaves and soon after a couple sits down next to the cowboy and the man asks him "Are you a real cowboy?".
He replies "Well, I always thought I was but I just found out I'm a lesbian".

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead went into a bar and asked the bartender:

Brunette: "I'll have a B and C."
Bartender:"What is a B and C?".
Brunette: "Bourbon and Coke."
Redhead: "And, I'll have a G and T."
Bartender: "What's a G and T?"
Redhead: "Gin and tonic."
Blonde: "I'll have a 15."
Bartender: "What's a 15?"
Blonde: "7 and 7"

Buying drinks at a bar

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead went into a bar and ordered their drinks from the bartender.
Brunette: "I'll have a B and C."
Bartender:"What is a B and C?".
Brunette: "Bourbon and Coke."
Redhead: "And, I'll have a G and T."
Bartender: "What's a G and T?"
Redhead: "Gin and tonic."
Blonde: "I'll have a 15."
Bartender: "What's a 15?"
Blonde: "7 and 7"

I've just invented a new drink.

It's has Irish whiskey, German schnapps, French cognac, English beer, and American bourbon.
I call it the Titonic.
While it sounds strange, add ice and it goes down quickly.

Little Johnny and the Salesman

A salesman knocks on a door. A few seconds later the door opens. Little Johnny is standing there with a bourbon and Coke in one hand and lit cigar in the other hand.
The salesman looks at him for a second and then asks "Little boy, is your mommy here?"
Johnny flicks some cigar ash on the carpet, rubs it into the carpet with his shoe. Then he looks at the salesman and asks "What do you think?"

A drunk orders a shot of Wild Turkey....

Sorry sir, we don't have Wild Turkey only a House bourbon? What can I get you?
I'll have a shot of Wild Turkey
I'm so sorry sir, we just ran out, how about a Jack Daniels
I'll have a shot of Wild Turkey
Okay sir, if you can spell Wild Turkey, I'll get you a shot
W-I-L-D T-U-R-K-E-Y, Wild Turkey
Sir you forgot the F
There's no F in Wild Turkey
That's what I've been trying to tell you,

A Jew, c**..., American and a Indian are sitting around a table

... and they're all sipping on their bourbon. They're all very rich and they c**... says " I think I will buy Apple. " And they all nod in approval save the jew.
Then the Indian says " I want to buy Google. " And they all nod in approval save the jew.
Then the American says " I want to buy Samsung " And they all nod in approval save the jew.
Then the jew shudders and says " sorry, not selling. "

Having a Party?

My wife came in from shopping with two 18-pack cases of lager, a case of bitters, six bottles of wine, four handles of v**..., two bottles of Bourbon, a case of club soda, ice and two loaves of bread. …
I said, Are we having a party? …
She said, No.
I said, Why did you buy two freakin' loaves of bread then?"

Three old women go to a baseball game....

...To make things more interesting, they sneak in a bottle of bourbon with them. After a while, a lot of the game has gone by, and the ladies find they are almost out of bourbon. Given the information here, can you tell me the status of the game?



>^(It's the bottom of the Fifth, and the Bags are loaded.)

Why didn't the bourbon distiller try to lift a full 53 gallon barrel by himself?

Because it was too whiskey.

When I was little my dad always did this one magic trick.

He turned a bottle of bourbon into domestic violence

A bear walks into a bar an says to the bar tender, "I would like a bourbon and...... a coke."

The bar tender says "What's up with the big pause?" The bear said "I've had them all my life"

A man rushes into a bar,

he orders up two shots of bourbon. As soon as the bartender puts them in front of him, the guy slams them down his t**....
"Two more!", the man requests.
The bartender, frowning, pours two more shots. Immediately the man downs both.
"Keep 'em coming - TWO MORE!", he demands.
The bartender advises, "You should slow down there buddy?"
The man replies, "Hey! If you had what I have, you'd be drinkin' this way too!"
The bartender, embarrased, apologizes pouring two more, "I'm sorry man. What have you got?"
The guy explains, "A buck-fifty"

Bourbon joke, A man rushes into a bar,

jokes about bourbon

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these bourbon jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.