Bourbon Day Jokes
5 bourbon day jokes and hilarious bourbon day puns to laugh out loud. Read holiday jokes about bourbon day that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Bourbon Day Funny Jokes to Tell Your Friends and Kids.
What is a good bourbon day joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
The Montana Department of Employment
The Montana Department of Employment, Division of Labor Standards claimed a small rancher was not paying proper wages to his help and sent an agent out to investigate him.
AGENT: I need a list of your employees and how much you pay them.
RANCHER: Well, there's my hired hand who's been with me for 3 years. I pay him $200 a week plus free room and board. Then there's the mentally challenged guy. He works about 18 hours every day and does about 90% of all the work around here.
He makes about $10 per week, pays his own room and board, and I buy him a bottle of bourbon every Saturday night so he can cope with life. He also sleeps with my wife occasionally.
AGENT: That's the guy I want to talk to - the mentally challenged one.
RANCHER: That would be me.
A real cowboy?
An old cowboys goes into a bar, sits down and orders a drink. As he sits there sipping his bourbon, a young lady sits down next to him. She turns to the cowboys and asks "Are you a real cowboy?".
He replies "Well, I've spent my whole life on the ranch, herding horses, mending fences and branding cattle, so I guess I am".
She says "That's cool. I'm a lesbian. I spend my whole day thinking about women. As soon as I get up in the morning I think about women. When I shower or watch TV, everything seems to make me think of women".
The young lady finishes her drink and leaves and soon after a couple sits down next to the cowboy and the man asks him "Are you a real cowboy?".
He replies "Well, I always thought I was but I just found out I'm a lesbian".
A man owned a small farm
A man owned a small farm near Maddock. The North Dakota Wage and Hour Department claimed he was not paying proper wages to his help and sent an agent out to interview him. "I need a list of your employees and how much you pay them," demanded the agent.
"Well, there's my field hand who's been with me for three years. I pay him $600 a week plus free room and board. The cook has been here for 18 months, and I pay her $500 a week, plus free room and board. Then there's the half-wit who works here about 18 hours a day. He makes $10 a week and I go into town and buy him a bottle of bourbon every Saturday night," replied the farmer.
"That's the guy I want to talk to, the half-wit," says the agent.
"That would be me," replied the farmer sadly.
The Half-Wit
A man owned a small ranch near Great Falls, Montana. The Montana Labor Department got a tip that he was not paying proper wages to his help and sent an investigator out to interview him.
"I need a list of your employees and how much you pay them," demanded the investigator.
"Well," replied the rancher, "there's my ranch hand who's been with me for 3 years. I pay him $1200 a week plus free room and board."
"The cook has been here for 18 months, and I pay her $1000 per week plus free room and board."
"Then there's the half-wit. He works about 18 hours every day, with no days off, and does about 90% of all the work around here. He makes about $10 per week and pays his own room and board."
"But, I buy him a bottle of bourbon every Saturday night, and he also sleeps with my wife occasionally."
"That's the guy I want to talk to... the half-wit," says the investigator.
"You're talking to him," replied the rancher.
Minimum Wage
The Montana Department of Employment, Division of Labor Standards got an anonymous tip that a small rancher was not paying proper wages to his help. They immediately sent an official agent out to investigate him.
GOVT AGENT: I need a list of your employees and how much you pay them.
RANCHER: Well, there's my hired hand who's been with me for 3 years. I pay him $350 a week plus free room and board.
GOVT AGENT: Well, those payments and conditions are within the law. Anybody else work here?
RANCHER: Well, I wasn't going to say. But there's also a mentally challenged guy. He works about 18 hours every day and does about 90% of all the work on the ranch. He makes about $10 per week, sometimes less. He pays his own room and board. I do buy him a bottle of bourbon every Saturday night so he can cope with life, but then sometimes he tries to make love to my wife.
GOVT AGENT: Okay, yes, then THAT's the guy I heard about, and need to talk to -- the mentally challenged one.
RANCHER: That would be me.
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