Boris Johnson Jokes

42 boris johnson jokes and hilarious boris johnson puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about boris johnson that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Best Short Boris Johnson Jokes

Short boris johnson jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The boris johnson humour may include short magic johnson jokes also.

  1. My son asked if he could meet the British Prime Minister I said "Boris Johnson? Liz Truss will probably be too busy. What do you want to meet Rishi Sunak for anyway?"
  2. If Sunak wanted to go full Machiavel he could resign because of the fine, thus putting pressure on Johnson to do the same. Of course neither of them will, because they’re a pair of fetid chancers.
  3. The lockdown is costing us billions every day! Should we really push this debt on the next generation? Let me remind you of the average age of a Tory voter. We can not afford to lose them.
  4. My grandfather would be very happy with what Boris Johnson's leadership has done to Britain. But then again, he was in the SS.
  5. As the finances of rishi sunak’s wife come under intense media scrutiny, Boris Johnson says if everyone could keep talking about it until about January that’d be great.
  6. But are we sure Rishi will have the resources to pay the fine? Boris will clearly borrow it from a donor.
  7. What's the difference between a point in a distribution whose value is much higher than the rest and Boris Johnson? One is an outlier to the right, the other is an outright liar.
  8. I used to think that Boris Johnson getting corona must be the irony of the century. However, it just got trumped.
  9. Great Britains new Prime Minister Did you see that Boris Johnson might be the next Prime Minister of Great Britain? I remember when the U.S. had a BJ in the top office!
  10. Boris Johnson is the most dangerous politician in Britain precisely because of his charm. Funny and likeable, even when he errs it's cute, like a shaved Winnie the Pooh eating all the honey

Quick Jump To

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about boris johnson can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of boris johnson puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

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Boris Johnson One Liners

Which boris johnson one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with boris johnson? I can suggest the ones about new prime minister and joe biden.

  1. What's Boris Johnson's favourite TV show? Deal or No Deal
  2. I was at Boris Johnson's lockdown party It was pretty conservative.
  3. What do Boris Johnson and Tottenham Hotspur have in common? An empty cabinet
  4. Boris Johnson said everything would be back to normal on 21st June Julyed
  5. A lert joke Stay alert? It's a deadly virus not a zebra crossing.
  6. Who's the UK's new foreign secretary? Boris Johnson
  7. if boris johnson was priminster he'd make all of us shop at Borrisons

Boris Johnson Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.

What funny jokes about boris johnson you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean prime minister jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make boris johnson prank.

Boris Johnson, Justin Trudeau and Emmanuel Macron at NATO meeting joking about Trump:

Macron: Is that why he was late?
Trudeau: He was late because he takes a 40-minute press conference off the top !
Trudeau: Oh, yeah, yeah yeah. He announced ...

Boris Johnson coronavirus joke

For those sending around vile jokes about the Prime Minister in ICU... please remember the words of The Queen last night:
I hope in the years to come everyone will be able to take pride in how they responded to this challenge. Show some class.

A man dies and arrives at Heaven

As he's standing at the Pearly Gates, he notices a huge wall of clocks behind St Peter.
He asked, "What are all those clocks?"
St Peter replied, "Those are lie clocks, every time someone tells a lie, the hands on their clock move."
"Oh! Whose clock is that?" He says pointing.
"That's Mother Theresa's clock, it's hands have never moved."
"Wow! And whose clock is that?"
"That's Abraham Lincoln's clock, it's hands have only moved twice."
The man asks, "Where is Boris Johnson's clock?"
St Peter replies, "We're using it as a ceiling fan"

UK politician Boris Johnson has promised to lie in front of bulldozers clearing a path for the 3rd Heathrow runway.

This should be no problem for him as he has already had plenty of practice lying in front of a bus!

Boris Johnson and the Queen are riding in the horse-drawn Royal carriage along the Royal Mile...

Suddenly, the horse lets out a long, godalmighty f**..., the kind that sounds like it could s**... paint.
The Queen, embarrassed, leans to Boris and says "I'm sorry about that".
And Boris replies "That's quite alright, ma'am, I thought it was the horse."

What do you call it when a fowl chasing Boris Johnson bites him in the b**...?

Chicken cacciatore.
(I'm so sorry.)

Donald Trump, Vladimir Putin and Boris Johnson walk into a room...Oh God. This isn't even a joke anymore.


Yesterday, UK protesters tore down monuments of Boris Johnson and Theresa May

Lawyers assume that they will be charged for a statue-tory crime

Donald Trump, Boris Johnson and Vladimir Putin go to a bar

Bartender (who is somewhat inexperienced) asks what they want to order.
Putin - "I'll have a V and C."
Bartender - "What's a V and C?"
Putin - "v**... and Coke."
Johnson - "I'll have a G and T."
Bartender - "What's a G and T?"
Johnson - "Gin and tonic."
Trump - "I'll have a 7 and 7."
Bartender - "What's a 7 and 7?"
Trump - "15."

Boris Johnson disinfectant joke

Boris Johnson: Following a very productive phone call with Donald Trump, I would like to hear from any UK companies that can turn over their production line to making Dettol, Domestos, Cillit Bang, Lysol and Toilet Duck.

Boris ventilator joke

Boris Johnson joked to senior company bosses that the scheme to build more ventilators in such a short time frame could be called 'Operation Last Gasp'.

Why did Boris Johnson Brexit?

Because just imagine the baby he'd have made if he hadn't pulled out of Angela Merkel!

Boris Johnson Stay Alert joke

Please can someone tell Boris coronavirus is not a physical assailant? You can't stay alert to single-stranded RNA.

Boris: Lockdown

Me looking at my 1TB folder of TV and movies to pass the time.
It's like... I was made for this.

Whats see-through and scares everyone that thinks about it?

Boris Johnson's claims he doesn't want to be Prime Minister.

Boris Johnson is getting divorced from his wife

Since his wife said "I want to leave EU" and after the divorce bill goes through, Boris will officially be entering the single market.

What do Boris Johnson, the British Economy, and an entertained cube of beef extract have in common?

They're all laughing stocks.

Boris Johnson speech Lert joke

Boris Johnson's always been a tough politcal speaker....

Turns out he's just a mummy's boy.

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these boris johnson jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.