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Border Wall Jokes

51 border wall jokes and hilarious border wall puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about border wall that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Border Wall Short Jokes

Short border wall jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The border wall humour may include short border crossing jokes also.

  1. Who says building a border wall won't work? The Chinese built one over 2,000 years ago and they still don't have any Mexicans.
  2. This is now the longest government shut down in US History. In lighter news, if seeing who will crack first on the border wall is prolonging it, then this shut down truly is... a Mexican stand off.
  3. Mexicans were asked what they thought of Trump's border wall. They replied, "we're very upset... ...but we'll get over it."
  4. Bill Gates has agreed to fund Trump's border wall... On the one condition that they install Windows.
  5. Mexicans WILL build the wall... Upon contract of Canadian goverment for their owm southern border!
  6. The Democrats agreed to sign over $6 Billion for the construction of the border wall, on one condition... that Trump stay on the other side. Trump agreed.

    ...but Mexicans refused.
  7. No matter who wins the election they are going to have a build a wall on the southern border of Canada.
  8. Did you guys hear this joke about Trumps Mexican border wall? It's hilarious. I'm still trying to get over it.
  9. Mexico is starting to build a wall They're worried about the Americans crossing the border when Trump is elected.
  10. What kind of dogs will patrol the Trump wall? Border Collies!
    I just came up with this after not sleeping for 30+ hours. Sorry for the cheesy goodness.

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Border Wall One Liners

Which border wall one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with border wall? I can suggest the ones about border patrol and trump wall.

  1. I had a joke about Trumps border wall But it doesn't hold up over time.
  2. China has a border wall And they have no Mexicans
  3. How will a border wall keep us safe... If it keeps Americans IN?
  4. I had a joke about Trump's border wall ... ... but it fell flat.
  5. What do Mexicans think about Trump's border wall? They'll get over it.
  6. What do you call a street on the Mexican border? Wall Street
  7. Yo mama so fat Donald trump used her as the border wall.
    :)
  8. Chuck Schumer is totally for border security As long as you don't try to put up a wall.
  9. I'm a Trumpsexual so I only fap to big, hard, thick, massive border walls.
  10. How big is the US-Mexico border wall going to be? It's gonna be YUGE!!!

Experience Instant Grins & Giggles with Playful Border Wall Jokes

What funny jokes about border wall you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean boarder jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make border wall pranks.

Yo mama so fat, when a Mexican saw her near the border they said,"

this must be Trump wall".

You're so fat that Trump, won't need to build a wall anymore, he can just call you to stand at the border.

An Englishman and a Scotsman find a shiny lamp. After giving it a rub, a genie pops out...

"For freeing me, you shall each have one wish!" says the Genie. "What is it you want the most?"
"Well," says the Englishman, "I'm fed up with all these Scots coming down into England. I wish for a giant wall to be built around England, so that no Scots can ever get in again."
"You wish is my command," says the genie. "It is done.
"What is it that you want, Scotsman?"
After a pause, the Scotsman says, "Tell me about this wall."
"It's a thousand feet high," says the genie, "And three hundred feet across. It covers every inch of England's border. It is made of the strongest concrete, and is unbreakable."
"Good," says the Scotsman. "Fill it with water."

An argentinean and a Brazilian get lost in the desert...

They proceed to find a lamp. The argentinean rubs the lamp and a genie comes out. Seeing as the two are lost, he decides to give one wish to each of the men.
First, the argentinean man says his wish:
"I wish that there was a wall on the borders of my country, so big and strong that no one would be able to invade it!"
The genie grants his wish, and a gigantic wall appears on the borders of Argentina.
Then the brazilian man goes to say his wish, but before he asks a question:
"Is the wall really strong and big?"
"Yes" the genie answers.
"Then fill it with water" the brazilian man says.

p**... Englishman and p**... Irishman

p**... Englishman and p**... Irishman are walking along the beach together, when they come upon a lamp in the sand. Being familiar with such clichés, they picked up the lamp, rubbed it, and lo and behold a genie appeared before them.
"For releasing me from my prison, I shall grant you both one wish each."
p**... Englishman goes first, and thinks silently for a moment:
"Well, genie, I love my country, and I'm sick of it being ruined by lazy immigrants who do nothing but live off of state benefits and handouts. I wish all the immigrants were gone from my country, and that it was just us English that lived there. Furthermore, I want a giant wall built around the coast and borders of England so nobody else can get in."
"Done" says the genie, and **p**...** p**... Englishman is back in England with the rest of his compatriots
"Genie," says p**... Irishman, "tell me more of this giant wall surrounding England"
"Well, it's over a mile high and half a mile thick. Nothing can get in or out." the genie replied
p**... Irishman thought for a moment, then looked to the genie and said:
"Fill it with water."

Pink Floyd is planning a reunion close to the Mexican border next year

Word on the street says they're gonna play a few hits from The Wall

Mexico was pretty livid when Donald Trump announced his plan to build a wall along the southern border of the United States...

...But once it's erected and complete, I'm sure they'll manage to get over it.

Instead of a wall on the Mexican border, Trump could build a dome over the continental U.S. They'll call it:

The Freedome.

Donald Trump pulls out of Paris Climate Arrangement after alleged threats to interfere with the U.S. Mexico border wall.

He heard "Climb-it" deal, and flipped out

Trump's Wall Won't Matter

People will still find a way to cross the border. There's a reason why they're called Mexicans, not Mexican'ts

The Wall

They should build the border wall out of Hilary Clinton...
Since people can't seem to get over her.

So Donald Trump is standing on the nearly completed US-Mexican wall...

President Trump is standing on the US-Mexico border, next to his nearly completed border wall.
Alongside him is the president of Mexico who is smiling and looking genuinely pleased.
**Trump**:  I have just added the final brick onto the wall so it is now complete. What are you smiling about.
**Mexican President**:  I'm just really happy that you decided to build this beautiful wall.
**Trump**:  Why?
**Mexican President**:  Because you are in Mexico at the moment.

We need a wall on our southern border to keep out the filthy, r**..., murdering savages

Keep the Yankees out of our glorious country!
We might be small and weak but at least we are actually a democracy!

The wall

Why trump wants to build a wall around the us mexico border?
To defeat china by building a larger wall.

I asked my Latino friend if Mexicans are offended by all the talk of building a wall on the southern border...

He said, "Eh... we'll get over it"

Donald Trump figured out how to get Mexico to pay for the border wall.

He promised monthly diplomatic visits to Mexico by motorcade.

Trump's border wall idea will actually work! The Chinese have had their wall for over 2000 years...

There are still no Mexicans in China!

We need a wall right now. There is a crazed horde of savages at the southern border just waiting to stomp our country flat. They are murderers and rapists and terrorists! And some might be good people.

Canada really needs a wall right now.

What would you call it if the US federally legalized m**..., and used the tax revenue to fund the border wall to Mexico?

Bi-partisanship at the highest level

Donald Trump decides to visit Mexico to see the progress of his border wall.

While out in the middle of the hot sun he notices a pond of water by a farm. Thirsty, after having drunk all the water he brought with him, he decided to kneel down and take a drink.
An older Mexican man approaches him and says No bebas el agua, las vacas se han cagado en ella. (Translated: Don't drink the water, the cows have crapped in it.)
Donald shouts back: Don't you know who I am. I'm Donald Trump, president of the United States of America. How dare you speak to me in that dirty language. You must speak to me in English and show me the respect I deserve!
The man responds, Use two hands, you'll get more.

All these Texas troubles reminds me of a joke. Two guys walking down a beach and find a magic lamp. Rub it and a Genie pops out. He says, "You get one wish each for me to grant!" First guy says ok I got it. TEXAS is the best state ever. I want....

You to build a huge massive wall around the border and make it so no one can come in or out and the world can not see in. Genie says ok wish granted and p**... giant wall around Texas appears.
Second guy, thinks and thinks and goes ok. Genie I want you to fill Texas with water.