bookstore Jokes

funny pick up lines and hilarious bookstore puns

A guy walks into a Muslim bookstore wearing a Make America Great Again hat...

As he was wandering around taking a look, the clerk asked if he could help the man find anything.
 
Do you have a copy of Donald Trump's book on his U.S. immigration policy regarding Muslims and illegal aliens?
 
The clerk said, Kiss my ass… get out… and stay out!
 
The man said, Yes, that's the one.  Do you have it in paperback?

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A man walks into a bookstore...

A man walks into a bookstore and asks an employee if they have Donald Trump's new book on immigration. The employee, an immigrant himself, said, "fuck you, get out and stay out!"

The man replied, "yeah. Do you have it in paperback?"

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I went into a Muslim bookstore the other day.

The owner said can I help you? I said I'm looking for the new Donald Trump book about the Muslims and the illegal Mexicans. He said fuck you, get the hell out of here and never come back. I said, that's the one, do you have it in paperback?

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A guy walks into a Muslim bookstore...

He asks the Muslim store owner, "Do you have that book, the one that explains Trump's Muslim Ban and illustrates points concerning his immigration policy?" The Muslim owner responds, "Get the fuck out of here you pig! Get the fuck out and stay out! And if you ever try to come back I'll personally beat your ass!" The guy answers, "Yeah, that's the one, do you have it in paperback?"

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Mexican bookstore

I was walking down a mall and saw a store called "Mexican Bookstore." Naturally curious, I walked in and asked the guy behind the counter:

"Excuse me, sir, but do you happen to have a book about Donald Trump's immigration policy?"

"Fuck you! Get the fuck out and stay the fuck out!" he yelled

"Yeah, that's the one, do you have it in paperback?" I said.

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A Republican walks into a college bookstore and asks the proprietor, "I'm looking for Trump's new book on illegal immigration?"

The owner says "GET THE FUCK OUT!"

The Republican responds "Yeah! That's the one!"

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A guy walks into a bookstore...

A guy walks into a bookstore and asks the assistant, "Hey, do you know if you guys have the new book for guys with short penises?"

The assistant says, "I'm not sure if it's in yet."

Guy says, "Yeah, that's the one!"

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A man is walking through his local mall and sees a Mexican book store.

He decides to go in because he's never seen a Mexican bookstore before.

He browses the store before finally asking the clerk "Do you have the book on Donald Trump's foreign policy with Mexico?"

The clerk replies "Fuck you, get out, stay out!"

The man replies "Yeah, that one."

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I saw a "Muslim" Bookstore today and I walked in.

As I was wandering around to take a look, the clerk stopped me and offered to help me.

I imagine I didn't look like his normal clientele, so I asked, "Do you have a copy of Donald Trump's book on his U.S. Immigration Policy regarding Muslims and illegal Mexicans?"

The clerk angrily said, "Fuck off, get out and stay out!"

I said, "Yes! That's the one. Do you have it in paperback?"

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I went to a large bookstore ...

... and asked the lady at the counter, where the self-help section was. She said if she would tell me, it would defeat the very purpose of it.

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I walked into a bookstore

Me: "Do you have any books on turtles?"

Worker: "Hardback?"

Me: "Yeah, with little heads."

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A Muslim man goes to a bookstore and asks if they have the latest Donald Trump book on immigration...

The conservative owner of the store takes one look at him and says, "Fuck off, get out and don't come back!"

"That's the one!" says the man

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Campus bookstore robbed

The Campus bookstore was just robbed of $25000. The criminal was seen taking a sweatshirt and 4 textbooks

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Today I was at the bookstore.

As I was wandering around, the clerk stopped me and offered to help me.

I imagine I didn't look like his normal clientele, so I asked, "Do you have a copy of Donald Trump's book on his U.S. Immigration Policy regarding Muslims and illegal Mexicans?"

The clerk angrily said, "Fuck off, get out and stay out!"

I said, "Yes! That's the one. Do you have it in paperback?"

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I walked into a bookstore

I walked into a bookstore, just trying to kill some time. I walked about a third of the way into the store before I really started to look around. I realized that all of the books were about Islam and copies of the Koran. It was a Muslim bookstore. I started to head back to the door when a clerk stepped in front of me and politely asked Is there anything I could help you find today? I hesitated then said I am looking for a book written by Donald Trump, it's about Mexican and Muslim immigration into the US. He looked at me for two solid seconds, then replied in a harsh whisper Fuck you! Get out, and never come back! I responded Yes! That's the one. Is it available in paperback?

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A midget walks into a bookstore...

...& asks clerk: 'do you happen to have any books on irony.'

The clerk points to a shelf: 'top row.'

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I saw a book at the bookstore called "How to Solve 50% of your problem"

So I bought two

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A guy walks into a bookstore...

and asks the clerk, "do you have the new book by Donald Trump about deporting all the Muslims in the U.S.?"

Stunned, the clerk responds, "are you kidding me? Get the hell out of here!"

"That's it! Do you have it in paperpack?"

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I was walking through the mall and I saw a Muslim bookstore.

I was curious to what was actually in a Muslim bookstore so I went in.

As I walked around I saw the salesman give me the stink eye, but asked if he could help me.

I knew I probably wasn't his usual clientele, so I asked "Do you have a copy of Donald Trump's book on his U.S. Immigration policy regarding Muslims and illegal aliens?"

He replied "Kiss my ass! Get out and stay out!"

I said, "Yes that's the one!! Do you have it in paperback?"

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A joung Jew loved to read books

He loved to read so much that he read all of the books in the library in his town. So one day he went to a bookstore and asked if they had a book that he haven't read yet. An old Jew that worked there said yes and handed the boy a strange, covered in dust book titled "DEATH". He said to the boy:

"Here is the book that you've probably never heard of. I can sell it to you for $10 if you promise me to never, ever open it at the last page."

The boy agreed and bought the book. He read it and liked it very much, but, as promised, he didn't open it at the last page. One day he could bear it no longer and checked the last page. "Suggested Retail Price: $5".

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Some Mexican jokes from a Mexican

So, it's okay for you to laugh...

Q: What's a Mexican's favorite bookstore?

A: Borders

Q: What's a Mexican's favorite sport?

A: Cross Country

Q: Why do Mexicans cross the border in pairs?

A: Because it says no tres passing.

Q: What do you call four Mexicans in quicksand?

A: Cuatro cinco

Q: Why do Mexicans have tamales for Christmas?

A: So they'll have something to unwrap.

Q: How do you keep a Mexican from stealing?

A: Put everything on the top shelf.

And lastly,

Q: What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball?

A: Juan on Juan


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The Muslim bookstore

So, I was walking through the mall in Chicago and I saw that there was a "Muslim Book Store." I was wondering what exactly was in a Muslim bookstore so I went in.

As I was wandering around taking a look, the clerk stopped me and asked if he could help me.

I imagine I didn't look like his normal clientele, so I asked, Do you have a copy of Donald Trump's book on his U.S. Immigration Policy regarding Muslims and illegal Mexicans?"

The clerk said, "Fuck off, get out and stay out!"

I said, "Yes that's the one," Do you have it in paperback?

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what do you call a bookstore that's also a bar?

tequila mockingbird

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I went to a bookstore and asked the woman at the desk if they had any books on turtles

"Hardback?" She asked.

"Yes" I said...
"And the little head and feet"

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Bookstores are a great place to meet women...

... But not so if your opening line is "What does this word mean?"

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A Muslim man wearing a Make America Great Again hat . . .

walks into a bookstore. After browsing around for a while a young woman in a headscarf walks up and says "Salaam, friend. I can't help but notice the hat you're wearing. You can't really support Trump, can you?"

Checking to make sure no one is listening, he whispers, "no, of course not, but keep your voice down."

She whispers back "Then why the hat?"

He says, "oh, thats easy. I'm starting a garden."

She replies, "A garden? What does that have to do with anything?"

He says "Ha! You try walking up to the counter with a stack of books about fertilizer and see what happens!"

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So I went to a bookstore to buy Donald Trump's book

Today I was at the bookstore; as I was wandering around, the clerk stopped me and offered to help me.

I imagine I didn't look like his normal clientele, so I asked, "Do you have a copy of Donald Trump's book on his U.S. Immigration Policy regarding Muslims and illegal Mexicans?"

The clerk angrily said, "Fuck off, get out and stay out!"

I said, "Yes! That's the one. Do you have it in paperback?"

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Mexican bookstore

A man is walking through a mall and notices a store sign that says "Mexican bookstore" So he decides to go in because he has never seen Mexican book store before. He browses through the store, and then he finally asks the clerk

"Do you have the book on Donald Trump's immigration policy?"

The clerk replies, "Fuck you, get out and stay out!".

The man replies "Yeah, that's the one! Do you have it in paperback?"

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I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, "Where's the self-help section?"

She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.

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I was walking down the street the other day

I was walking down the street the other day, when I saw a business called "Mexican Bookstore." I walked in and asked the clerk if they had a book about Trump's immigration policy.

"Fuck you! Get out and stay out!" he shouted.

I said, "Yeah, that's the one. Do you have it in paperback?"

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I walked into a bookstore and told the clerk...

I walked into a bookstore and I told the clerk, "I'm looking for a book called, 'How to Deal with Rejection without Killing'... Do you have it?? **Do you have it?**"

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I walked into a bookstore and asked if they have any books on gloryholes.

She said ya, over there in the mystery romance section.

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A blind man walks into a bookstore with his seeing eye dog...

He picks the dog by the tail and starts swinging him around.


A clerk sees this and asks,"Sir may I help you?"


"No thanks, we're just looking around."

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I called the bookstore and asked if they had any books about constipation.

She told me it hasn't come out yet

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My buddy Frank always goes to the bookstore rather than just get the online PDF

yeah, he's a real 'buy the book' kinda guy...

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What are the most funny Bookstore jokes of all time ?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking with someone about Bookstore? Well, here are the best Bookstore dad jokes to laugh out loud. Crazy funny puns and Bookstore pick up lines to share with friends.

Joko Jokes