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Blown Jokes

155 blown jokes and hilarious blown puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about blown that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

This article dives into the diverse world of jokes that have been blown away by their listeners. From references to windy weather and gusty winds to flat tires and immovable objects, find out what makes these gags so effortlessly hilarious.

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Popular Blown Short Jokes

Short blown jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The blown humour may include short blew jokes also.

  1. Why can't a Samsung be disguised as an iPhone? Because eventually, its cover would be blown.
  2. Why do men give their jacket to women when its cold? Because it hurts to get blown by chattering teeth
  3. What's the difference between JFK and Bill Clinton? One got his head blown off, the other was assassinated
  4. Two deer walk out of a gay bar. One looks to another and says,."I must've blown 20 bucks in there."
  5. What do you call a sweater that was blown away by the wind? A cardi-gone.
    (yes, I made this one up this morning)
  6. The fuse had blown on a lamp I was throwing away and my mother suggested I give it to a charity shop I told her I couldn't do that, they'd only re-fuse it
  7. I'm going to dress up as a subaru head gasket for Halloween. There's a really good chance I'll get blown.
  8. People love animals. There's movies where people get blown up and shot. But you kill one puppy... They ask you to leave the theatre!
  9. Got head from a Midget last night... I guess you could say I was blown out of proportion...
  10. Since the wife left me I've bought a motorbike, got a dog, slept with two women, and blown a grand on drink and drugs. She'll go mad when she gets home from work.

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Blown One Liners

Which blown one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with blown? I can suggest the ones about blows and blew mind.

  1. Life is like a soup Life is like a soup, you only get blown if you're hot.
  2. Syria has a lot of nice reviews Everyone says they got blown away.
  3. What do you call Napoleon hit by a cannonball? Napoleon Blown Apart.
  4. Life is like a bowl of soup. You only get blown if you are hot.
  5. I've never met a full-blown Jew They're always just Jewish
  6. What do you call a French conqueror who stands too close to a bomb? Napoleon Blown-apart
  7. What do you call a French general after being hit by a cannonball? Napoleon Blown-aparte
  8. What begins with an "s", ends with a "x" and leaves a guy blown away? Semtex.
  9. 25% of your roof has been blown off due to a hurricane! What's your response? oof!
  10. My store got blown up yesterday Business is boomin'
  11. Why couldn't the soldier feel his legs? Because his arms were blown off.
  12. A photographer shot his subject with a Canon. She was blown away.
  13. I gave my Anorexic girlfriend a kite today... She was blown away.
  14. What's the result of tossing a live grenade into a French kitchen? Linoleum blown apart.
  15. What do you call someone who has had their legs blown off? Defeated.

Blown Away Jokes

Here is a list of funny blown away jokes and even better blown away puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • 2 weeks building a greenhouse for my herbs only to see it blown away in freak winds What a waste of thyme!
  • Did you hear about the TV anchorman who lost it and shot up the whole studio? We were all blown away by the news
  • I was trying to buy some storm insurance for my camp site, but was refused. They said, If your tent gets blown away, you won't be covered.
  • A battery and a light bulb were in a race. Who won? None of them:
    The light bulb was blown away from the short circuit and the battery gave up because it couldn't resist it either.
  • Just saw Elle Fanning. I was blown away.
  • I tried to get tornado insurance for my campsite, but the company refused. They said, If your tent gets blown away, you... won't be covered.
  • Went to see Infinity War with a group of friends.... About half of us were blown away.
    Although the real joke is OP having friends.
  • An Irishman, Englishman and a Scotsman enter a brand new bar. The Englishman and Scotsman loved it, the Irishman was blown away.
  • Went to the paper shop... It had blown away
  • The Lone Ranger woke to see his tent blown away by a tornado. He declared, "Tonto, we’re not in canvas anymore."

Mind Blown Jokes

Here is a list of funny mind blown jokes and even better mind blown puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • After the presidential debate, they debate about the debate. Mind Blown
  • I've always wanted to see a live performance of "Our American Cousin" My buddy Abe wouldn't stop raving about it. He kept talking about how his mind was literally blown.
  • A time-traveling FBI officer informed JFK that the tenth next president of the US would be a reality TV celebrity JFK was mind blown
  • My friend said he knew of a way to always win in Russian roulette I can't tell you what it was, but let's just say... My mind was blown
  • Just read an article on how JFK died. Mind. Blown.
  • Me: hey do you want your mind to be blown? My dog: woof
    Me: we live on a ball
  • Absolute mind blown that 50 Cents real name is Arthur Dollar.
  • tyra banks "REAL ME" a reaction to alien cat? mind blown
  • The description is false The title is false
    MIND BLOWN
  • My mind loves its head It's getting blown all the time.
Blown joke, My mind loves its head

Blown Proportion Jokes

Here is a list of funny blown proportion jokes and even better blown proportion puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Why did the atom stick around? Cuz if he split, the situation would have gotten blown out of proportion.
  • Terrorists have been saying they'll horizontally expand images of their foes. The threat is being blown out of proportion.
  • The controversy surrounding Donald Trump and the Russian hacking of American voting machines is being blown way out of proportion... who cares if Putin voted for him.
  • Whenever I use a racist stereotype, it's blown out of proportion. Just like all the Muslims in the world.
  • "Blown out of all proportion" ... .. is a cliche you don't see every day of the week.
  • You know what is blown out of proportions? Overweight s**... b**....
  • Apparently there's a big scandal about an NBA player getting o**... s**... from a midget... but it was blown way out of proportion.
Blown joke, Apparently there's a big scandal about an <a href="/nba-jokes.html" title="Nba jokes">NBA player</a>

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about blown can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of blown puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Cheerful Fun Blown Jokes to Brighten Your Day with Humor and Joy

What funny jokes about blown you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean fooled jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make blown prank.

Did you hear about the guy at the gun store who got fired?

He went ballistic.
Did you hear about the apartment building that got blown up? There were roomers everywhere.
Bob: Do you know why my pool exploded?
Joe: Na.
Did you hear about the power plant employee that went on a shooting spree? People say he went melted down and went nuclear.

Snooki's kind of like Hurricane Sandy...

She's large, slow-moving, an has blown just about everyone in the Jersey Shore.

How are men like fuses?

Once they're blown, they're useless.

What did the squash say to the cucumber when he saw the pumpkin patch get blown up?

Oh My Gourd!

Hey billy jokes?

Need some more Billy & Highliner Jokes.
One is "Hey billy you ever been to sea"
"No Captain Highliner but I have been blown ashore"

A penguin takes his car to a garage.

The mechanic tells him it will take about an hour to diagnose the problem. So, the penguin decides to go next door to the ice cream shop for a treat while he waits.
He returns about an hour later and the mechanic tells him. "It looks like you've blown a seal."
The penguin wipes his beak and says, "I did not. I was eating ice cream."

How did the media know JFK was cheating on his wife?

They saw him getting blown in the back seat.

A Penguin takes his car to a mechanic

The mechanic says that it may take a while so the penguin goes across the road to get an ice cream.
Because penguins have little fins instead of hands he gets ice cream all over his beak.
When he returns to the mechanic the mechanic, dusting off his hands, says, "looks like you've blown a seal" to which the penguin says, "Oh, no. Its just ice cream."

You ever hear what happened to Sally?

"You ever hear what happened to sally?"
"Why no, why don't you tell me?"
"She got her arms blown off in a war.."
*silence*.......
"Knock Knock"
"Who's there?"
"Not Sally."

I guess my parents were secret agents all along.

I heard they're getting a divorce because my dad got blown by the mailman.

n Eskimo was out for a drive

An eskimo is out for a drive one day when his car breaks down and is forced to call a mechanic. Finally the mechanic arrives and he sets to work, looking under the bonnet until he locates the problem. He looks up at the Eskimo and says, "You've blown a seal, mate" to which the Eskimo hastily replies, "No I haven't! That's just frost on my moustache."

A penguin's car breaks down

He pulls over to a shop owned by a walrus who tells him he'll look at it. The Penguin takes a stroll and buys a vanilla treat.
The Penguin gets back and the Walrus say
"Looks like you've blown a seal"
The Penguin wipes his chin and says..
"No, No, it's just ice cream."

This morning I read about that 14 year boy with a clock they thought was a bomb

...I just checked again and it's really blown up since then

The Buddhist idea of Nirvana literally translates to "Blown Out"

Typically in reference to something like a candle, but occasionally to Kurt Cobain's brains.

TIL The chicken crossing the road jokes real meaning

To get to the other side was also a comment on the afterlife, as in the "other side" as in knowing he'd die crossing the road. I'm 37, heard this joke so many times, and not once put this together till now. /mind blown

Bridge blown up

During a drill a bridge is labeled with a sign as blown up. To his anger the drill instructor sees a whole platoon crossing the bridge. The last soldier has a sign on his back. The instructor pulls out his binoculars. The sign reads: We're swimming.

"Captain, have you ever made love at sea?"

"No son, but I've been blown ashore many a time."

I love the smell of blown out matches...

Chile vs Mexico was a real treat!

Whats the difference between a Christian and a Muslim?

One blows up kids, the other gets blown by them.

What's similar about a shy j**... and a bagpipe

They only make noise once they've been blown up.

Chuck Norris has his legs blown apart after tripping on a landmine...

He walked it off.

The hurricane in Haiti is just like having s**... with a p**....

At least once it's over. Everything is wet. There's a good chance you were blown. You are probably poorer than you were before and there's a good chance you are going to catch a disease.

All these jokes about the note 7 are terrible

But they have really blown up ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Did you hear about the kid who got his legs blown off?

He's a whole two feet shorter.

Right when I thought all this news of terrifying clowns had blown over...

... We elect Donald Trump as President

What do a gay dolphin and a car that leaks oil have in common?

Chances are, both have blown a seal

I haven't seen a lead blown this badly since

Hilary's 2016 campaign.

I got blown today

By the wind of course ;)

Have you ever blown Bubbles when you were younger?

Well he's back in town and had asked about you!

TIL that you can get dishonourably discharged from the Navy for boarding the wrong vessel just once

Does "dying when the ship gets blown up by the enemy" count as dishonourably discharged?

TIL that elephants f**...

I was blown away!

What do you call a french t**...?

Napoleon Blown apart

I just won a f**... contest.

The judges were blown away.

Women are like the wind

Sometimes you just get blown and it feels great. Other times things get rough and you lose your house.

What do you call a kitchen e**... in early 1800s France?

Linoleum Blown Apart!

I have a lot in common with Bambi.

When we were both little we saw one of our parents get blown.

Is Allahu Akbar a good pickup line?

From what I hear, it's always getting guys blown.

2017 will be known for 2 Harveys

One blew forcefully, other got blown forcefully

A man travelling through Arizona stops at a small town and goes into a bar

He stands at the end of the bar and lights up a cigar. As he sips his drink, he stands there quietly blowing smoke rings.
After he's blown nine or ten smoke rings, an angry Indian comes up to him and says, "Listen buddy, if you don't stop calling me names, I'll smash your face in!"

Penguin driving home has car trouble...

A penguin driving home when his car begins to overheat. He parks at a garage and the mechanic says it will be a little bit before he can look at it.
The penguin decides to go across the street and get ice cream. The penguin slops ice cream all over himself from head to toe and returns to the mechanic. The mechanic comes out and says well it looks like you've blown a seal.
The penguin says no it's ice cream, honest.

A magician says to his audience...

A magician says to his audience "I can make myself appear in 100 different places in this room". He says "3, 2, 1, Abracadabra!" Nothing happens so he tries once again, "3, 2, 1, Abracadabra!" Still nothing happens. Flustered he asks to be excused while he checks his handbook. He closes the book and says " Sorry, I've been saying the wrong magic word, 3, 2, 1, Allahu Akbar!" Needless to say his audience was blown away.

Soldier: My legs, my legs! I CAN'T FEEL MY LEGS!

Medic: That's because your arms have been blown off.

A lead singer gets blown by a big fan backstage at the end of a concert and all the band members find him n**....

Group: Ewww! Get a room!
Singer: I would if you could fit three blades the size of a jet engine into my living room!

What did Lieutenant Dan say after getting his new legs blown off?

"Oh, the iron knee!"
Note: Old joke I made up and told friends in high school, before realizing his new legs are not actually made of iron. Hope the joke is still amusing though

Wearing crocs is pretty similar to being blown by a dude.

Feels pretty nice, then you look down and realize how gay it is.

What do terrorists and inflatable s**... dolls have in common?

They both get blown up to be greeted by virgins.

Penguin.

A penguin goes to get his car fixed at the mechanics on a hot day. Mechanic tells penguin it will be a while, so the penguin goes to the shop across the road and get some yummy vanilla icecream. The penguin returns to the mechanic and the mechanic says "looks like you've blown a seal.". the penguin replies "no it's only icecream."

[OC] How are guys like light bulbs?

They're both out immediately after being blown.

An Italian soldier wakes up in a hospital having been dragged out of the battle.

The doctor walks in and tells the soldier, "I'm sorry to inform you that both your arms and legs we're blown off in the heat of the fight".
The war hero starts to crying like a baby. The doctor peers round at his wife and asks, "do you think he'll be OK?"
She replies, "Would you be OK if you could never talk again?"

Today I found out my neurologist is also a p**...

Mind blown!

Here's a line you wouldn't hear in a war film.

"I can't feel my legs!"
"That's because your arms were blown off."

Why do prostitutes make excellent hitmen?

I dont know... but I heard that their victims are always blown away.

Blown joke, Why do prostitutes make excellent hitmen?

jokes about blown

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these blown jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.