Blowing Nose Jokes
33 blowing nose jokes and hilarious blowing nose puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about blowing nose that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Blowing Nose Short Jokes
Short blowing nose jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The blowing nose humour may include short picking nose jokes also.
- Noses and Boyfriends Boyfriends are like noses...
People get disgusted when you blow them in public.
Especially if you're caught without a tissue - I've been accused of lying about how much snot comes out of my nose when I sneeze. They always say I'm blowing it out of proportion
- One time I had to blow my nose and didn't have Kleenex, so I used a sock. Sadly, that wasn't the only thing I had used the sock for that day.
- Dave went to an optician and said, "I think I need new glasses, these are blurry." The optician replied, "If you're going to clean them with your handkerchief, do it before you blow your nose."
- A nose walks into a bar The bartender says, "hey pal, you look sick" to which the nose replies "blow me!"
- Why don't Mexicans blow their noses? So that they have something to pick in the off-season.
- What's the difference between a woman with a cold and a p**... with a photographic memory? One blows her nose, one knows her blows
- What's the difference between a h**... and a woman with a cold? A woman with a cold blows her nose...
- They say having s**... is like having a nose... Because when you feel that first drop, you know you're going to blow.
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Blowing Nose One Liners
Which blowing nose one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with blowing nose? I can suggest the ones about bleeding nose and runny nose.
- What does Hannibal Lector use to blow his nose? A tissue.
- Direct from my 8-year old: How do nursing babies blow their noses?
With breast tissue. - What did native Americans use to blow their nose? Their tee-pee
- When Donald has a stuffy nose, what does he do? He blows it out of his...where-ever.
- The nose drops „Big smeller" – let´s have a blow-out.
- I keep blowing my nose And my friend is telling me it's a cold but it's not.
- Yur mom is so fat When she blow her nose chicken nuggets come out.
- What did the African man use to blow his nose? A Mogadishu
- What does a tissue yell when you blow your nose? INCOMING BOGEY!!
Blowing Nose Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about blowing nose you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean picking your nose jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make blowing nose pranks.
Guy walks into a bar and there's a gorilla sitting in the corner.
Guy says to the bartender, "What's with the gorilla?"
Bartender says, "I'll show ya." .
The bartender walks over with a baseball bat and smashes the gorilla right in the nose. The gorilla gets on his knees and gives the bartender a b**....
Bartender says, "What do ya think?"
Guy says, "That's great."
Bartender asks, "You wanna try?"
Guy says, "Sure, but don't hit me so hard."
A man was watching TV and tossing peanuts in the air and eating them.
His wife calls him and he turns his head while eating one and it goes into his ear.
They try in vain to take it out when their daughter comes home with her boyfriend after a date.
The boyfriend says he can help and puts two fingers up the man's nose and asks him to blow hard and out pops the peanut.
After the boyfriend leaves, the wife remarks, "Wow, that's a smart boy our girl is dating! What do you think he is going to become when he grows up?".
"From the smell of his fingers, our son-in-law", says the man.
The Stuck Peanut
A man gets a peanut stuck firmly in his ear and no matter
how hard his wife tries, they cannot get it out. Just as they're
about to give up, their daughter arrives home with her
boyfriend. When they hear what has happened the
boyfriend tells them confidently that he knows how to get it
out. He sticks 2 fingers up the man's nose and tells him to
blow as hard as he can. The man does this and the peanut
pops out.
Sometime later the parents are talking and mum
comments, "Our Mary's got a clever boyfriend there. I
wonder what will become of him.
I'll tell you one thing, by the smell of his fingers, he'll be
our son-in-law, came the reply.
A blonde was having a conversation with an elephant, a pufferfish, and a fox...
The blonde said to the elephant, "If the pufferfish was a human he would be a Muslim, because he just loves to blow himself up." The elephant broke out laughing but the blonde cut him off and said to the pufferfish, "I don't know why he's laughing, if he was a human he would be a Jew, and I think he nose why." The pufferfish was now laughing uncontrollably, and the fox who was also with them realising he would be next if he didn't say something - said to the blonde, "If you were an animal you would be a whale, always wet, moaning, and ready to blow."
Peanut
One evening a man was at home watching TV and eating peanuts.
He'd toss them in the air, and then catch them in his mouth In the
middle of catching one, his wife asked him a question - and as he
turned to answer her, a peanut fell in his ear.
He tried and tried to dig it out but succeeded in only pushing it in deeper.
He called his wife for assistance, and after hours of trying they
became worried and decided to go to the hospital.
As they were ready to go out the door, their daughter came home
with her date. After being informed of the problem, their
daughter's date said he could get the peanut out..
The young man told the father to sit down, then proceeded to
shove two fingers up the father's nose and told him to blow hard.
When the father blew, the peanut flew out of his ear.
The mother and daughter jumped and yelled for joy. The young
man insisted that it was nothing.
Once he was gone, the mother turned to the father and said,
'That's so wonderful! Isn't he smart? What do you think he's going to be when
he grows older?'
The father replied, 'From the smell of his fingers, our son-in-law.
While watching TV with his wife, a man tosses peanuts into the air and catches them in his mouth.
Just as he throws another peanut into the air, the front door opens, causing him to turn his head.
The peanut falls into his ear and gets stuck.
His daughter comes in with her date.
The man explains the situation, and the daughter's date says, "I can get the peanut out."
He tells the father to sit down, shoves two fingers into the father's nose, and tells him to blow hard.
The father blows, and the peanut flies out of his ear.
After the daughter takes her date to the kitchen for something to eat, the mother turns to the father and says, "Isn't he smart? I wonder what he plans to be."
The father says, "From the smell of his fingers, I'd say our son-in-law."