Blow Mind Jokes
122 blow mind jokes and hilarious blow mind puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about blow mind that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Blow Mind Short Jokes
Short blow mind jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The blow mind humour may include short blew mind jokes also.
- Buzzfeed employee is diagnosed with stage 2 brain cancer Doctor: Number 4 will blow your mind.
- Inventor displays the first knife ever. His friend, "that's the greatest invention since bread"
Inventor, "well I'm about to blow your mind" - JFK Assassination Document Release From what I hear, they reveal some pretty mind-blowing information
- This will blow your mind! If you take the pin out of a grenade and put your ear to the hole you can hear the faint sound of the world wide I.Q average increasing.
- Not only was John F. Kennedy's assassination an unexpected thing... It was also mind blowing.
- Invention of the knife "What is that?"
I call it the 'knife'.
"Wow, that's the best thing since bread!"
Greg, I am about to blow your mind. - I have an amazing gardener who's both vision impaired and dyslexic. His work is Mind BLowing
- Step One. Implant a tiny bomb in your head and prepare the detonation button. What happens next will blow your mind.
- I can't wait to read the BuzzFeed article on "20 Things You Will Love about Stranger Things" Eleven will blow your mind!!!
- I went to the JFK memorial museum and got to simulate his assassination in VR It was mind blowing
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Blow Mind One Liners
Which blow mind one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with blow mind? I can suggest the ones about mind blowing and blow.
- I just read John F Kennedy's biography The end was mind blowing
- 1 in 6 people... find Russian roulette mind blowing.
- I just tried out the Samsung Gear-VR with my Note 7. It was mind-blowing.
- Saw a documentary on Russian roulette It was mind blowing.
- 1/6 russian roulette players Finds russian roulette mind blowing.
- A Sapiosexual couple's foreplay Involves blowing each other's minds
- Point a gun at your head and pull the trigger what happens next will blow your mind
- What do you say when a magic trick blows your mind? Abrakadamn bruh!
- A man puts a gun against your head What happens next will blow your mind!!
- JFK is back! He certainly has some mind-blowing stories to tell us!
- My uncle died He found it mind blowing that you can't play Russian roulette with a Glock
- "So, Mrs. Kennedy, how was that parade?" "Mind blowing"
- What did Lincoln say about his experience at Ford theater? He said it was mind blowing.
- Have you guys scene the new john Wilkes booth movie? I've heard it's mind blowing.
- How do you blow an anti vaxxers mind? Invent the cure for autism
Blow Mind Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about blow mind you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean blown away jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make blow mind pranks.
I just watched a squirrel bury a nut in my front yard.
I'm going to dig it up and replace it with a Cadbury egg.
That'll blow his little mind.
Mind=blown
I once knew a h**... who was studying psychiatry. For $20 she'd blow your mind.
New neighbor.
Two women were talking about the new hunk in the neighborhood.
"But he acts so s**...," said one to the other.
"I think he must have his brains between his legs."
"Yeah," her friend sighed, "but I'd sure love to blow his mind."
I went to my girlfriend's house last night for a romantic night in...
It was amazing, we had a three course meal with champagne over candle light, we then snuggled up on the sofa, to watch a movie, then, when we went up stairs, I let her get changed, while I spread rose petals over the bed, then, we had the most amazing, mind blowing s**... that I've ever had, but just as I was about to finish, her parents walked in...
I am now banned from babysitting.
Mailman's last day on the job.
After 30 years, mailman George decides to retire. On his last day, he makes his usual rounds.
When he arrives at the first house, the whole family comes out, congratulates him, and sends him on his way with a $50 gift envelope.
At the second house, they present him with a box of fine cigars.
At the next house, he is met at the door by a strikingly beautiful woman in a revealing negligee. She takes him by the hand and leads him up to the bedroom, where she blows his mind with the most passionate s**... he has ever experienced.
When done, they go downstairs, where she fixes him a giant breakfast. As she pours him a cup of coffee, he notices a dollar bill sticking out from under the cup's bottom edge.
"All this is just too wonderful for words," he says, "but what's the dollar for?"
"Well," she says, "last night, I told my husband that today would be your last day and that I wanted to do something special for you. I asked him what to give you. He said, 'Fuck him. Give him a dollar.' But breakfast was my idea!"
h**... captures 5 Jews
In a concentration camp h**... catches 5 Jews and asks the first one :
~ How many meters high can you jump?
~ 1 meter, he answered as he was trembling.
h**... gives him one loaf of bread and asks the same question to the second Jew.
~ 2 meters...replies the second Jew.
h**... gives two loaves of bread and asks the same question to the third Jew.
~ 3 meters! responds quickly the third Jew.
h**... draws his gun and blows his minds in air. Now the Jews concerned ask him:
~ Well, why you killed him?
And h**... replies:
~ He can jump over the fence!
Driving in Scotland
(First post here, let me know if i need to fix anything please).
An American decides to visit Scotland. While there, he decides to rent a nice car to explore the country. Not long on the road he is pulled over by a police officer. The officer approached the vehicle and asks the American,
"I don't the way you were drivin' back there. Have you been drinkin' today?"
"No officer I haven't." To which the officer replies,
"Well, I guess ya wouldn't mind proving yurself with a breathlizer test, would ya?"
"If you will stop pestering me, than no, I wouldn't mind." The American blows and the machine reads a flat .00. "See? I told you I haven't been drinking. May I go now?" The officer was skeptical and retorted,
" The danm thing must be broken! Gimme that!" The officer blows and the machine immediately starts ringing. Registering a .38."Guess it's working, don't let me pull ya over again." To which the American promptly drives away. Only to get pulled over three miles later, by the same officer, for the fourth time that day.
Two guys and a girl are stranded on a desert island
All hope is lost and they decide if they're going to die, at least they're going out with a bang. With nothing else to keep them occupied, all they do is have s**.... Nonstop mind blowing s**.... They're trying everything in the book, every position, physically enjoying each other as much as possible.
After two weeks, the girl approaches the two guys. "I'm sorry, I can't take it any more. I can't live like this." and she kills herself.
After two more weeks, one of the guys speaks up. "I'm sorry, I can't take it any more. I can't like like this."
The other guy looks at him and solemnly agrees. "You know what, you're right. We'll bury her tonight."
They say us men all think with our d**......
but all I want is a woman who will blow my mind.
whale joke
Out in the ocean there are 2 whales watching a fishing boat. When the first whale says to the second "do you wanna see something funny?" the second whales says "sure" so both whales swim under the boat and on the first whales cue they release their blow holes flipping the boat. Both whales now back a safe distance from the boat the first whale says "ahaha that was great, do you know what would be even better?" the second whale says "what?" the first whale then says "if we went and ate the Fishermen" the second whale then says "I don't mind an occasional b**..., but I don't s**... s**..."
A little boy and his grandfather...
...were walking through a meadow on a beautiful summer day.
"Grandpa," said the boy, "why is the grass green?"
The old man shrugged. "No idea," he grunted.
Then the boy asked, "Grandpa, why do the flowers smell so nice?"
"Beats me," said the old man.
"Grandpa, what makes the wind blow?"
"No clue."
"Grandpa," said the boy, "do you mind me asking you all these questions?"
"Of course not," said the old man. "How else will you learn anything?"
I saw a squirrel bury a nut in my backyard today.
I'm going to swap it for a grilled cheese sandwich and blow his mind.
Adam and Eve
When God made Adam he noticed that Adam was sad and asked what was wrong.
Adam - I'm lonely.
God - That's no good! How about I make you a companion? One that is gorgeous, give you mind blowing s**..., will cook and clean, and doesn't mind it when you spend time with the guys or watch football?
Adam - That sounds awesome! What will it cost me?
God - An arm and a leg!
Adam - What can I get for a rib?
2 whales
Two Whales, Bob & Brenda, are swimming in the cold arctic waters when Bob spies a boat. "It can't be!" exclaims Bob. "What" asks Brenda. "You see that boat in the distance, Brenda? Well that's the whaler that murdered my parents!" "Oh Bob, that's awful" replies Brenda. "Quick, Brenda, I have a plan! you go port side & I'll go starboard & we'll blow as hard we can out of our blow-holes & sink the boat!" so Bob & Brenda position themselves either side of the boat & blow with all their might. Sure enough, the sea turns to foam & the boat capsises throwing the sailers into the sea. Brenda turns to leave. "Where do yu think you're going?" asks bob. "We're not done yet! Now we're going to eat the sailors!" "Look" replies Brenda "I don't mind doing the b**... but there's no way I'm swallowing s**...!!"
[Alternate Punchline Request]
I have an uncle who loves jokes. I told him a joke a long time ago that he absolutely loved. Now that he is older he has forgotten I was the one who told him and re-tells me the joke every time I go to visit him and I have to fake laugh. This time I'd like to have an alternate punchline ready to blow his mind. However, I've thought about this for a long time and have come up with nothing. Many of you are very clever so I hope you can help me out.
Here is the joke:
"Why do seagulls fly over the sea?"
"Because if they flew over the bay they would be called bagels!"
Did you hear about the p**... with a phd in Psychology?
She'll blow your mind.
What would JFK think about all these conspiracy theories?
He'd probably find them mind blowing.
Did you hear that the Vatican elected a new Pope?
Never mind, they were just blowing smoke.
Have you ever seen Gregor Clegane fight?
It'll blow your mind.
.
.
.
.
I'm sorry.
I recently saw the documentary about Kurt Cobain
I thought that it was mind-blowing.
If guys think with their p**..., what does a guy say to a girl after a date?
Blow my mind.
I met a p**... with a degree in philosophy.
She'll blow your mind, man.
Finished reading a biography on JFK....
...the ending was mind blowing.
Take a p**...
1. Take a p**...
2. Point it to your head
3. Pull the trigger
WHAT HAPPENS NEXT WILL BLOW YOUR MIND
Man walks into a bar
He goes up to the bartender and tells him he would like to have 7 beers lined up right in front of him. As the bartender is drawing his beers, he asks him, "So, it seems you might be celebrating something. What might it be, if you don't mind me asking?" Man tells him that he is celebrating his very first b**.... The bartender tells him "That's great, congratulations!" The man tells him "You don't understand, I'm trying to get the taste out of my mouth."
What is literally the most important fact you'll ever learn, that will totally blow your mind?
That people exaggerate.
I blow my kids' minds when they tell me, "Daddy, it's the opposite day." And I say...
.."is it?"
I met a muslim today
It was truly a mind blowing experience
Child falls in gorilla enclosure
what happens next will blow his mind
Click here for 17 facts about s**... methods.....
#8 will blow your mind!
If a woman says, "all men think with their d**..."
Well... then blow my mind.
If JFK could see the state of this country...
It would blow his mind.
So I heard you just saw a play at Ford Theater, how was it?
It was Mind-Blowing
Did you hear about the man whose vape device exploded while he was smoking it?
It was a mind-blowing experience.
BuzzFeed's "Ten ways to tell if someone is a t**..."
#6 will blow your mind!
How would you describe Oberyn Martell's personality?
He's mind blowing!
Did you hear about the philosophy grad student who became a s**... worker?
For $100, she'll blow your mind.
You know how they say men think with their p**...?
Yeah your wife blows my mind every night
I'm really gettting into the music of Nirvana.
Love those guys. Especially the lead singer. He was mind-blowing.
The Kennedy Assassination
it really blows my mind
Once in a while
Russian roulette is mind blowing.
It's ok for my GF to tell me: "men only think with their p**..."
As long as she keeps blowing my mind
I love it when my girlfriend says men think with their p**...
That woman blows my mind
Do you know what really blows my mind?
Telekinetic prostitutes.
How do you blow a flat earthers mind?
With dynamite.
"How was the JFK documentary?"
Mind blowing!
What's the best part about meeting a girl who's a member of ISIS?
The s**... is mind blowing.
Based on how many people kill themselves each year...
It really blows my mind
A one-eyed girl walks into a bar...
After a short while she sneezes, and her glass eye flies out of its socket.
The guy sitting next to her manages to grab it and hands it back to her.
"Thanks," she says.
So they start talking, and she winds up taking him back to her apartment. She makes him a terrific dinner, then gives him a night of the most mind-blowing s**... he's ever had. Finally she makes him a huge breakfast the next morning.
The man is happy, but he still feels the need to ask "Do you do this for every man you meet?"
"No. You just happened to catch my eye."
TIL a mind-blowing fact.
Some people s**... at Russian Roulette.
Two couples are getting bored with their s**... lives, so they decide to swap partners
After a night of wild passionate s**..., Mike wakes up, rolls over, kisses his new lover, and says, "Last night was absolutely mind-blowing! Come on. Let's go see how the ladies made out."
I had a dream I was in Dallas riding in the car with JFK...
It was mind-blowing.
What do pizza and s**... have in common?
When it's good it's mind blowing good but when it's bad, it's still pretty good
What is the difference between a normal blonde and a blonde with a Ph.D?
The one with the Ph.D will blow your mind too!
Imagine if our brains could self destruct.
It would be mind blowing...
I just found out Kurt Cobain killed himself...
...It was mind blowing.
I know most men think with their p**...
But I'm not afraid to blow your mind
I got o**... s**... from a psychic yesterday.
It was mind blowing.
What do you call a man that can blow a woman's mind with just his tongue?
A cunning linguist
Did you hear about the p**... who's a philosophy major?
She could really blow your mind.
During the annual cavemen conference ...
Greg : so I kept rubbing this rock against another rock until it became very thin and now I can cut vegetables,meat using this . I call this "The Knife" .
Chief Gogo : wow , I thought no-one can beat Gorg's invention of using wheat flour and water to create a new food called "bread" but yours is a worthy contender
Greg " that's not it ,chief "
And then places a piece of bread on the stone and takes the knife in his hand
" What I'm about to do will blow your mind " .
What if JFK discovered that he'll be shot in the head?
That would be mind blowing for him.
My new hairdryer is so strong.
It is mind-blowing.
Lincoln
I heard Abraham Lincoln saw a good play.
The end was so mind blowing
You know what really blows my mind any time I think about it?
My telekinetic hair dryer.