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Blonde Story Jokes

31 blonde story jokes and hilarious blonde story puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about blonde story that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Best Short Blonde Story Jokes

Short blonde story jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The blonde story humour may include short blonde girl jokes also.

  1. A blond and a brunette jumped off the roof of a 10-story building at the exact same time. Who hit the ground first? The brunette.
    The blonde had to stop and ask for directions.
  2. A blonde came up to the librarian and yelled, "This book s**...! There's way too many characters and the story makes no sense!" The librarian said, "So you're the one who took our phone book."
  3. How about a blond joke. My cousin blond* was once asked at a restaurant if she wants her egg poached. She promptly replied "isnt that i**...." True story too.

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Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about blonde story can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of blonde story puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

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Blonde Story One Liners

Which blonde story one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with blonde story? I can suggest the ones about blonde moment and blonde hair.

  1. How many blonde jokes are there? One. The rest are true stories!

Hilarious Fun Blonde Story Jokes That Will Have You Rolling with Laughter

What funny jokes about blonde story you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean quick blonde jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make blonde story prank.

Blonde Co-Pilot

This is the story of the poor dizzy blonde flying in a two-seater airplane with just the pilot.
He has a heart attack and dies. She, frantic, calls out for help.
"May Day! May Day! Help me! Help me! My pilot had a heart attack and is dead. And I don't know how to fly. Help me! Please help me!"
She hears a voice over the radio saying:
"This is Air Traffic Control and I have you loud and clear. I will talk you through this and get you back on the ground. I've had a lot of experience with this kind of problem. Now, just take a deep breath. Everything will be fine! First, give me your height and position."
She says, "I'm 5'4" and I'm in the front seat."
"O.K." says the voice on the radio.... "repeat after me: Our Father...Who art in Heaven....."

I got on the bus, sat down and noticed a beautiful blonde Chinese woman crying in the seat across from me...

I moved over and asked her why she was crying.
"I don't usually bare my soul to strangers," she said.
I replied that sometimes it was perfectly fine to tell your story to a perfect stranger. She nodded and said, "I just came out of my therapist session and he says there is no way to cure me."
I asked what exactly was her problem. She said, "I'm a nymphomaniac, but I only get turned on by Jewish cowboys. You know, I do feel better. By the way, my name is Kim."
"Glad to meet you," I said. "My name is Bucky Goldstein."
-----
Steve Wright

A blonde takes her car to her mechanic and tells him it's running rough.

After working on it for a few minutes, he has it idling smoothly. "What's the story?" she asked. "Just c**... in the carburator," the mechanic replied. "How often do I have to do that?" asked the blonde.

A guy walks into a bar.

Inside the bar he sees a blonde sitting at the bar, she's intently watching the 10 pm news. The news story is about a man who's standing atop a building, preparing to jump. The guy says to the blond "I bet you $50 he'll jump". The blonde takes the bet and continuous to watch.
Some time later, the man on the building jumps. The guy turns to the blonde and says "I'm sorry but I can't take your money. I watched this on the 6 pm news and knew he would jump". The blonde replies "I watched it at 6 pm too, but I didn't think he'd jump again"

An engineering student rides up to his fellow engineering student on a bicycle

His buddy asks him "Where did you get the bicycle?"
"Crazy story! A beautiful blonde rode up to me in this bike, got off, stripped off all her clothes, and told me "take what you want!""
"Good choice, the clothes probably wouldn't have fit anyways..."

A teacher asked in a class full of blondes who killed Abraham Lincoln

A student said It wasn't me
Second blonde said I was absent yesterday
Another blonde I couldn't kill a fly and you ask me if I killed a human being
The teacher frustratingly left the classroom and head to the principal,whose happen to be blonde.
She heard the story and went to the class.
She left the classroom and asked the teacher are you sure the killer in this class?

A brunette and two blondes were hanging on a rope that was attached to a helicopter...

They were hanging on for dear life. However, they were told that the rope was going to break soon and that it could only support two people at this rate.
The two blondes started arguing about who should let go of the rope. The brunette didn't speak for most of the argument, but suddenly thought of a brilliant idea.
She shushed the two blondes, and started telling them a story very emotionally. The two blondes were so touched by the story that they started clapping.
Problem solved.

A man and a blonde are in a bar, watching the evening news. They describe the story of a man threatening to jump off a building

The man turns to the woman and says, I'll bet you $10 that he jumps
The woman agrees to this bet, and they continue to watch. The man jumps off the building. Disappointed, the woman turns to hand him $10
The man declines the money. he says sheepishly, I can't take your money, I saw him jump during the afternoon broadcast.
The woman replies, Oh, I did too. I just didn't think he would do it again

A Blonde and her boyfriend are watching the 9pm news

A Blonde and her boyfriend are watching the 9pm news, the anchor is showing a video of a girl threatening to jump off a cliff. The guy turns to the Blonde and says "I bet you $500 she jumps" "you're on" the Blonde replies.
2 minutes later the girl jumps and dies.
As she is pulling money out her purse, the boyfriend says "I feel bad taking your money, but I watched the 6pm news and I saw this story" "me too" the Blonde answered, "but I didn't think she would be s**... enough to jump off again"

A blonde and a businessman are watching the 11 o'clock news when reports of a jumper on the roof comes on.

The businessman turns to the blonde and says, "I bet you $20 that the guy jumps."
The blonde agrees and 5 minutes later the guy jumps. As the blonde takes out her wallet to pay the businessman, he says, "no it's ok, i saw this story on the 8 o'clock news and i knew that would happen."
The blonde turns to the man with a somber expression and says, "I watched it too, but I didn't think he'd jump again."

A story of two blondes

Two blondes were in a bar watching the television when the news came on. It showed a guy on a bridge that was about to jump, obviously suicidal. "I'll bet you $10 he'll jump," said Betty.
"Bet you $10 he won't," replied Amber. Then, the guy on the television closed his eyes and threw himself off the bridge. The second blonde hands the first her money.
"I can't take your money," said Betty. "I cheated you. The same story was on the five o'clock news."
"No, no. Take it," said Amber. "I saw the five o'clock news too. I just didn't think the guy was dumb enough to jump again!"

A cowboy is walking n**... down main street...

and the sheriff came driving by and saw him. BWOOP BWOOP! He pulls over and talks to him.
"Son, why are you n**... in the middle of town?"
The cowboy chuckles and says "Well, it's a long story."
"There is a n**... cowboy on main street in my town. I got time for a long story, let's hear it."
"Alright, so I was throwin' hay in my barn when a pretty little blonde lady comes in and says 'It's mighty hot in here, why don't you take your shirt off?' I did and she did the same, and I didn't mind. Then she says 'why don't ya set down and take your boots off?' I do and she set down beside me. Then she says 'why don't ya take them pants off?' I do and she does the same. Then she looks at me and says 'now go to town.' So here I am!"

a blonde and a redhead are in a bar

When they see a man on the news threatening to jump off of a building. The redhead says "bet you 50 bucks he jumps" to which the blonde replies "you're on!". Sure enough, the man jumps and kills himself. The blonde goes to grab the $50 from her purse but the redhead stops her and says " I can't take your money. This is a repeat of an earlier story. I've seen this already." The blonde grabs the $50, puts it on the bar and says "so did I. I just didn't think he'd do it twice!"

Story of a dizzy blond !!!!

This is a story of a poor dizzy blond flying in a seater airplane with just the pilot.
He has a heart attack and dies. She,frantic,calls out a May Day.
"May day! May day! Help me! Help me! My pilot had a heart attack and is dead and i dont know how to fly. Help me! Please Help me!"
She heards a voice over the radio saying:
"This is air traffic control and i have you loud and clear.i willtalk you through this and get you back on ground. i've had a lot of experience with this kind of problem. Now,just take a deep breath. Everything wil be fine! Now give me your height and position! "
She says , "I'm 5'4 and i'm in front seat."
(Pause)
"O.K." says the voice in the radio.......
"Reapeat after me : Our father who art in heaven"

A blonde walks out of a hospital.

She hails a taxi. The cab driver noticed she had her hand bandaged. Striking up a conversation he asks how she injured her hand. The blonde looks up sheepishly and says, "I tried to commit s**...."
The cab driver is taken aback but looks at his passenger in the rearview mirror. "I'm glad you are okay but pardon me for asking; how did that affect your hand?"
The blonde takes a deep breath and starts her story. "I took a gun and put it up to one of ears, but then I got worried that I'd be scared of the noise when I pulled the trigger. So I put my hand up to cover my other ear."

A blonde and brunette are watching the 10 o'clock news...

The lead story is a man threatening to jump off a building. Before the end of the bit, the news breaks to commercial.
The brunette turns to the blonde and says, "I bet you $10 he jumps."
"Okay, I'll take that bet," replies the blonde.
The news comes back from break and the story ends with the man tragically jumping to his death. The blonde pulls out a $10 bill and holds it out to the brunette.
"I can't take your money," says the brunette.
"You won. He jumped," insists the blonde.
"But I cheated," replies the brunette. "I already saw this story on the 6 o'clock news."
"So did I," says the blonde. "But I didn't think he would be dumb enough to jump twice."

Bob And The Blonde

Bob walked into a sports bar around 9:58 PM. He sat down next to a blonde at the bar and stared up at the TV.
The 10 PM news was coming on. The news crew was covering the story of a man on the ledge of a large building preparing to jump.
The blonde looked at Bob and said, "Do you think he'll jump?"
Bob said, "You know, I bet he'll jump."
The blonde replied, "Well, I bet he won't."
Bob placed a $20 bill on the bar and said, "You're on!"
Just as the blonde placed her money on the bar, the guy on the ledge did a swan dive off the building, falling to his death.
The blonde was very upset, but willingly handed her $20 to Bob. "Fair's fair. Here's your money."
Bob replied, "I can't take your money. I saw this earlier on the 5 PM news, so I knew he would jump."
The blonde replied, "I did, too, but I didn't think he'd do it again."
Bob took the money.

Brooke Gladstone told this on "On The Media" today. Told it to several people and no one else thought it was nearly as funny as I did except for my brother and my wife.

Okay. So a guy is going down the street and he sees his friend. He hasn't seen him for I don't know how long. And he has this big orange head. And, and he goes up to him and he goes, hey, what's with the big orange head? And he goes, you know, it's a funny story. I was, I was in an antique shop and I found this lamp and I, I rubbed it and a genie came out, it gave me three wishes. And so, I wished for a gorgeous house and, and you see behind me this huge mansion. Yeah, it's really nice. That's the house. And then I wished for a beautiful wife, and, and you see that really lovely blonde coming down the street. That's my wife! And, and then here's where I think I went wrong. I wished for a big orange head.

A blonde and a brunette are watching the news...

A blonde and a brunette are watching the news, and they are showing a woman standing on top of a building contemplating s**.... The brunette says, "I'll bet you fifty dollars, that woman jumps and kills herself." The blonde accepts the bet. After a while the woman jumps and dies. The blonde pays the brunette fifty dollars. After some time the brunette feels bad and says, "I cheated. I saw that story on the news two hours earlier. Here is the fifty dollars you gave me." The blonde says, "So did I, but I figured she would be smart enough to not jump this time."

Men will be Men

A s**... Irish blonde at a Casino, seemed a little intoxicated 😎
She bet 20,000 Euro on a single Roll of dice .
She said - "I hope you don't mind, but I feel Luckier when I'm n**...."
With that, she removed her clothes, rolled the dice and yelled-
"Come on baby, Mama needs new clothes!"
As the Dice came to a stop, she jumped and yelled - "Yes, Yes,
I Won.. I Won.."
She hugged each dealer and picked up her winnings and clothes and left.
The dealers gazed at each other, dumbfounded. Finally, one of them asked-
"What number rolled on the dice?"
The other - "I don't know, I thought you were watching."
Moral of the story:
1.Not All drunks are Drunk,
2.Not all Blondes are dumb,
3.But all Men are Men!!!

A blonde and a brunette watching the news.

A blonde and a brunette were watching the 6pm news. There was a story of a man on top of a building attempting to commit s**.... The brunette bet the blonde that the man was going to the jump, the blonde didn't think he would. After the commercial break, they saw that the man jumped. The brunette admitted that she saw the 5pm news and already saw that he would jump. The blonde admitted that she also saw the 5pm news but didn't think that he would be s**... enough to jump again.

a blonde and a redhead are at a bar

Enjoying a few drinks after work. The local news on the television is showing a guy a bridge threatening to jump. The redhead turns to the blonde and says "I bet you 20 bucks that he jumps". The blonde thinks about it for a second and agrees to the bet. They continue watch the program and the guy indeed does jump off the bridge. "a bet is a bet" the blonde says as she hands the redhead 20 dollars. Feeling guilty, the red head says "I'm sorry, I cant take your money. The same story was on the 6 o'clock news. They just re-showed it at 8. I knew the guy was going to jump."
The blonde replies " I watched the 6 o'clock news too! I just didn't think he would jump twice!"

Gambling on the news

A man and a ***blonde*** woman are sitting next to each other at a bar. The news plays out on one of the TVs nearby. Both of them turn their attention to it when a story comes on about a man threatening to commit s**... by jumping off a bridge.
The man turns to the woman and says "I'll bet you five dollars that he jumps"
"He won't jump. You're on." She replies.
They continue to watch until eventually the man jumps.
The woman reaches for her purse to retrieve five dollars, but the man stops her.
"I can't take your money, I saw the same segment an hour earlier. I knew he was gonna jump."
"Oh, I saw it earlier too. But I didn't think he'd do it twice!"

Another blonde joke

A s**... Irish blonde at a Casino, seemed a little intoxicated.
She bet 20,000 Euro on a single Roll of dice.
She said-I hope you don't mind, but I feel Luckier when I'm n**....
With that, she removed her clothes, rolled the dice and yelled-
Come on baby, Mama needs new clothes!
As the Dice came to a stop, she jumped and yelled-Yes, Yes, I Won.. I Won..
She hugged each dealer and picked up her winnings and clothes and left.
The dealers gazed at each other,dumbfounded. Finally, one of them asked-
What number rolled on the dice?
The other-I don't know,I thought you were watching.
Moral of the story..
1.Not All drunks are Drunk.
2.Not all Blondes are dumb,
3.But all Men are Men!!! 😉

There was a Gay guy named Billy

Billy was dating a bisexual guy named Jordan. Recently, however, Jordan has started going to parties on Friday nights without inviting Billy. Billy, thinking that Jordan was ashamed of dating a guy, asks to go with him one day.
When they arrive at the bar, he notices that Jordan is not holding his hands like he usually does. When they walk in, a short, drunk blonde girl who wraps her arms around his waist. Jordan introduces the girl as Jean, who tells Billy that she's heard a lot about him. Billy wonders if he told her about their relationship and starts to get jealous. He tells Jordan that he's going to go home early.
Jordan follows him to the door and asks why he is leaving. Billy just says that he is not having fun and tells him to have fun with his "friend". Jordan realizes what this was all about and tells him that the girl was just someone he used to date. She recently had a child and he wanted to know whether the child was his or not.
Billy doesn't believe Jordan's story. He rolls his eyes and starts walking away again. However, Jordan stops him and looks him right in the eye. Then, he says, "Billy, Jean is not my lover. She's just some girl who said that I am the one. But the kid is not my son."

One day a blonde woman entered an autobody shop claiming that she’d suffered extensive damage to her new car.
The mechanic thought he’d have some fun with her so he told her that she didn’t need him to fixed all the dents.
He said she could fix them herself by blowing into the tailpipe as hard as she could and they’d all pop out.
The woman went home and proceeded to get down on her hands and knees in the driveway.
She was blowing into the pipe as hard as she could and her face was turning purple when another blonde woman walked by and asked what she was doing.
After hearing the whole story the second blonde pauses for a moment then responds, “Hello! The windows are down. Your personal check for the full $30,000.”

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these blonde story jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.