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Blond Haired Jokes

143 blond haired jokes and hilarious blond haired puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about blond haired that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Best Short Blond Haired Jokes

Short blond haired jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The blond haired humour may include short blonde haired jokes also.

  1. Mod Announcement: Due to complaints from our fair-haired readers, blonde jokes are no longer allowed... ...because they couldn't read them.
  2. What do you call several blonde hair blue-eyed men doing the 100 meter dash? The superior race
  3. If a woman likes you, you can tell her real hair colour from how it feels. Blondes touch you hard, brunettes touch you fast, redheads touch you... Gingerly
  4. Another blonde joke... SFW What do you call a blonde who dies her hair black?
    Artificial intelligence..
  5. I was sleeping with two twins for while in my 20s.... My friends all asked, "how can you tell them apart?" I replied, "well...Sharon has long blonde hair, and Derek has a beard."
  6. What did the Asian man say to his wife when the hospital nursery tried to send them home with a blonde hair, blue-eye baby? Hmmm... two Wongs don't make a white.
  7. Ad in the local paper: 25 year old woman, very attractive, beautiful blonde hair, perfect measurements, intelligent, with good sense of humor and stable income - Selling dump truck.
  8. What do you call a skeleton with blonde hair in a closet? Last year's winner of the blonde "hide and go seek" contest
  9. I used to have a friend with the most beautiful blonde hair I haven't seen them in so long and I really hope they didn't dye
  10. I bleached my hair on my 18th birthday. "I guess now you're legally blonde," my dad chuckled.

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Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about blond haired can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of blond haired puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

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Blond Haired One Liners

Which blond haired one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with blond haired? I can suggest the ones about blond hair and blonde hair.

  1. What do you call a blonde who dyes her hair brunette? Artificial intelligence
    *
  2. What do you call it when a blonde dies her hair black? Artificial intelligence.
  3. What do you call it when a blonde dyes their hair brown... Artifical intelligence.
  4. What is a blonde with dyed brown hair? Artificial intelligence.
  5. What do you call a blonde that dyes her hair red? Artificial intelligence.
  6. Why do blondes wear their hair up? To catch everything that goes over their heads.
  7. why did the blonde use her hair dryer on the laptop? It was frozen
  8. What do you call a blond with one strand of hair dyed black? A glimmer of hope
  9. What do you call a blond-haired, blue-eyed guy who is well-endowed? A Hung-Ariyan.
  10. How it is called when a blonde dyes her hair as brunette? Artificial intelligence
  11. A dumb blonde wearing headphones walks into a hair salon...
  12. Where's the only place that blonde girls can have dark hair? Between their teeth.
  13. Why do some blondes dye their hair? To gain themselves some artificial intelligence.
  14. How Do You Create Artificial Intelligence? Dye a blonde's hair.
  15. What did the blonde do after she combed her hair? .. She pulled her pants up.

Entertaining Blond Haired Jokes to Laugh Out Loud Fun with Everyone

What funny jokes about blond haired you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean blond girl jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make blond haired prank.

How can you tell when a brunette is actually a blonde who dyes her hair? When she trips over the cordless phone.

Three men are all working on building a house. They go up to the roof for lunch, and unwrapped their sandwiches. The Brunette says "if I get one more Tuna sandwich, I'm going to jump off this roof and kill myself. The black haired one says "if I get one more pickle and lettuce sandwich, I, too, am going to jump off this roof and kill myself. The blonde looks at his sandwich and also declares, "if I get one more peanut butter and jelly sandwich, I'm going to jump off this roof and kill myself." The next day, they all get the same sandwiches and kill themselves. That night, their wives all meet up and mourn. "If I had known that my husband was going to kill himself over a sandwich, I wouldn't have given it to him." The brunette cries. "Same," the raven head replies. They both look at the blonde. "Don't look at me, he packed his own lunch!"

Three men are all working on building a house. They go up to the roof for lunch, and unwrapped their sandwiches. The Brunette says "if I get one more Tuna sandwich, I'm going to jump off this roof and kill myself. The black haired one says "if I get one more pickle and lettuce sandwich, I, too, am going to jump off this roof and kill myself. The blonde looks at his sandwich and also declares, "if I get one more peanut butter and jelly sandwich, I'm going to jump off this roof and kill myself." The next day, they all get the same sandwiches and kill themselves. That night, their wives all meet up and mourn. "If I had known that my husband was going to kill himself over a sandwich, I wouldn't have given it to him." The brunette cries. "Same," the raven head replies. They both look at the blonde. "Don't look at me, he packed his own lunch!"

A blonde went to a hair dresser's one day, listening to a walkman.
The hair dresser asked her what she wanted, and the blonde replied,
"I need to get my hair trimmed, just make sure that you do not take these headphones off."
The woman looked at the blonde, surprised, but did as she was told.
While she was brushing the blonde's hair, she accidentally bumped the headphones, knocking them to the ground.
As she bent down to pick them up, the blonde fell over, onto the floor.
The hair dresser was very confused.
She picked up the head phones and listened.
This is what she heard..."breath in...breath out...breath in...breath out..."!

A lady calls the police to report her husband is missing.
The police arrive and ask for a description.
She tells them he's 6 foot 2 inches tall, blonde wavy hair and has a smile that makes everybody love him.
The police then go to the next door neighbor to verify this report and the lady next door tells the police, "You can't believe her.
He's 5 foot 4 inches tall, has no hair and he wears a perpetual frown on his face."
The neighbor then goes and asks the lady why she gave the police such a false report.
She replies, "Just because I reported him missing, doesn't mean I wanted him back!"

A blonde goes into a near by store and asks the clerk if she can buy the T.V. in the corner.
The store clerk looks at her and says that he doesn't serve blondes, so she goes back home and dyes her hair black.
The next day and asks the same thing, and again he said he doesn't serve blondes.
Frustrated, the blonde goes back home and dyes her hair yet again, to a shade of red.
Sure the clerk would sell her the T.V. by now, she returns and asks a different clerk this time.
To her astonishment, this clerk also says she doesn't serve blondes as well.
The blond asks the clerk, "How in the world do you know I'm a blonde?"
The clerk looks at her and says, "That's not a T.V.- it's a microwave!"

A brunette, a red-haired and a blonde comes to an edge of a hill. The rule is: if you lie, you fall off the hill.
A brunette says: - I think I'm the most beautiful... And she falls off the hill.
A red-haired says: - I think I'm the most clever... And she falls off the hill.
A blonde says: I think... And she falls off the hill.

A blonde desserts her home town out of shame, and colors her hair brown.
She drives past a farm and sees all the sheep.
She goes up to the farmer and ask, "If I guess how many sheep you have can I have one?"
The farmer nodded. She continued. "159" The farmer is surprised. "How did you know?"
"Lucky guess" She grabs one and gets in her car.
The farmer comes up and says, "If I can guess your real hair color can I get my dog back?"

A blonde is driving down the road and she sees a dead rabbit.
She stops the car and called out, "Does anybody got any hairspray!?"
A man pulls up and gives her a bottle of spray and she sprays it on the dead rabbit and the man stares and says "Why u doing that?"
The blonde says "Hairspray is for dead hairs"

A blonde, who had just dyed her hair, went to the hospital because her whole body hurt.
She told the doctor that where ever she touched herself it would hurt.
The doctor told her to demonstrate.
She touched her nose and it hurt.
She touched her stomach and it hurt.
The doctor asked her if she was a blonde and she said yes.
"Look Here Lady, your finger is broken!"

A blonde walked into an electronics store and said to the salesmen: "I want that tv."
The salesperson shook his head and said, "No, we don't sell to blondes."
So the blonde left and came back with her hair dyed brown and said: "I'll take that tv."
Again the salesman said: "No, we don't sell to blondes."
So she left again and came back with her hair dyed black and said: "I want that tv."
But the salesman still said: "No, we don't sell to blondes."
Finally the blonde got fed up and said, "That's it! How'd you know I was a blonde?!" she asked.
The salesman answered: "Cause that's a microwave."

A blonde walks into a electronic store and asks the manager, “Can I buy that TV”
“No”
“Why not?”
“Because your a blonde.”
So the blonde goes out and dyes her hair red.
She returned to the electronic store and said, “Can I buy that TV?”
“No”
“Why not?”
“Your a blonde.”
So the blonde goes and shaves her hair off and returns to the electronic store and says, “Can I buy that TV?”
“No”
“Why not?”
“You’re a blonde”
“How can you tell I’m a blonde, I dyed my hair red, then s**... it off!”
“Because that’s not a TV, that’s a microwave!”

Two little boys, one blond, one with brown hair, were arguing over whose father could beat the other’ up.
The brown-haired kid said, “My father is way better than yours.”
The blond came back, “Maybe, but my mother is better than yours.”
“That’s what my father says.”

A dumb blonde was really tired of being made fun of, so she decided to have her hair she would look like a brunette.
When she had brown hair, she decided to take a drive in the country.
After she had been driving for a while, she saw a farmer and a flock of sheep and thought, "Oh! Those sheep are so adorable!"
She got out and walked over to the farmer and said, "If I can guess how many sheep you have, can I take one home?"
The farmer, being a bit of a gambler himself, said she could have a try.
The blonde looked at the flock and guessed, "157."
The farmer was amazed - she was right!
So the blonde, (who looked like a brunette), picked one out and got back into her car.
Before she left, farmer walked up to her and said.
"If I can guess the real color of your hair, can I have my dog back?"

Q: How does a blonde part her hair? 
A: By doing the splits.

Q: Why didn't the blonde want a window seat on the plane? 
A: She'd just blow dried her hair and she didn't want it blown around too much.

A blonde and her husband were driving home, when they hit a rabit.
They both got out of the car and stood over the poor creature.
The blonde and her husband just stood their, when she said "Oh I know."
So she when in the car and rumaged through her purse and came out with what looked a bottle.
She poured it on the rabit and they both got in the car.
Suddenly the rabit got up hopped a little bit and waved, hopped a little and waved, hopped to the top of the hill and waved.
Then dissapered over it.
The husband just stared at his wife and said "Honey, what did you pour on that rabit?"
His wife just said "Hair Restorer with a permanent wave."

Three blondes are stranded on an island.
A fairy comes along and says that she will grant each person a wish.
So the first blonde says she wants to be really smart so she digs and finds a cell phone and calls the Army.
The second blonde says that she wants to be even smarter so she finds a flair and sets it off.
The third blonde says that she wants to be even smarter than both of them, so the fairy changes her hair color to black and she says,"Let's go over the bridge."

I wonder what happened to that dumb blonde I went out with.
I dyed my hair!

A doctor from the inner city was conversing with an old friend from med school at a cafe when he said, "Man, can I tell you something?"
His friend nods. "Sure."
"Okay, so the other day I had this one really hot, foreign patient, and I haven't been able to stop thinking about her since..."
He goes on to tell his friend everything about her, from her long blond hair and ability to speak fluent French, to her shimmering blue eyes and soft skin.
His friend seemed more disgusted with each passing moment.
"Dude, that is not cool."
The doctor, indignant, defended himself.
"What's wrong with that? Lots of doctors are attracted to their patients."
His friend simply shook his head and replied, "Maybe, but I guarantee you none of those doctors were pediatricians..."

What do blondes do after they comb their hair? They pull up their pants.

Why do blondes always wash there hair? They just read the instructions. Lather... Rinse... Repeat...

3 women of different hair colours get shipwrecked on a small desert island 1km away from a civilised island.

The first woman, who has brown hair, attempts to swim to the civilised island, but only gets 200 metres before getting tired and swimming back. The next woman, with black hair, sees the first one's attempt and also tries. She gets 400 metres before tiring and swimming back. The blonde then has a try, gets 800 metres, tires, and swims back.

Did you hear that famous blonde haired actress has been stabbed? She's called Reese, Erm...

Witherspoon?
No, with a knife.

A blonde movie star is pulled over......

The cops walks up to the car and says "driver's licence please". The blonde says "What's a driver's licence?" The cop impatiently responds, "It's that square thing with your picture on it". "Oh!," exclaims the Blonde and she pulls out a square mirror and hands it to the cop. As the cop looks at it, she scratches her head revealing long flowing golden hair*. She then hands it back and says, "Sorry for the inconvenience, I didn't realize you were a cop."

Blonde Thinks

A woman with green hair, a woman with red hair and a woman with blonde hair find mirror. A lady appears in the mirror and says, tell me something you think are true and you'll be rich. Tell me something that is not true and you die. The woman with green hair says: "I think I'm pretty." p**...! She's dead. The woman with red says: "I think I have a soul." p**...! She's dead. The woman with blonde hair says: "I think..." p**...! She's dead.

dumb blonde

A blond walk into a hair salon with headphones on and sits down in a chair. The blonde asks the woman working there for a haircut. The woman takes of the headphones and cuts the blondes hair. After she is finished she looks down and to her surprise finds the blonde dead. The woman puts on the headphones and hears this "Breathe in.....Breathe out.....Breath in.......Breath out"

How many sheep?

A blonde woman is tired of people assuming she's s**... and dyes her hair red. Feeling empowered, she goes for a car ride down a country road. Soon she sees a farm with hundreds of sheep. She walks up to the owner of the farm and makes this proposal: "These sheep are adorable, if I guess how many there are, can I keep one?" The farmer agrees, surely out of all the sheep this woman can't guess the number exactly. She looks around and replies "There are 593 sheep" The farmer is awe-struck, the number was exactly right. So the woman picks her sheep and is getting back in the car when the farmer runs up to her and yells "WAIT! If I can guess your natural color can I have him back?" The woman smiles and agrees, she already proved she's too smart to be called a blonde. The farmer replies "you're a blonde, now can I have my dog back?"

What do you call it when a brunette dyes her hair blonde?

Brainwashing.

A man goes to the beach...

...while he's walking down the shore he sees a 20-year old, blonde-haired girl sitting in the sand crying. Concerned, the man runs over to her. "What's wrong?" He asks.
"I'm twenty years old and I've never been hugged by someone other than family!" She starts sobbing.
Feeling bad, the man hugs her. "There, now you've been hugged." And walks on.
The next day the man walks on the beach again and sees another girl, this one with black hair, sitting in here chair bawling. "What's wrong?" He asks her.
"I'm 19 and I've never been kissed before!" She whines.
He gives her a small kiss on the lips. "There, now you've been kissed." And he walks on.
The third day of his vacation he sees a brunette, openly crying like the other two women. He sighs. "What's wrong?"
"I'm 18 and I've never been s**... before!"
He picks her up, looks her in the eyes, and tosses her out into the ocean, where sharks surround her.
"There. Now you're s**...."

So there's this blonde...

and she's sick and tired of being stereotyped as the dumb blonde, so she decides to dye her hair and move to another city. After she died her hair brown, she packs up her things and leaves for the new city. Driving down a barren country road on the way there, she starts to get really hungry. With no restaurants in sight, she pulls in to the only home as far as the eye can see, a sheep farm. Thinking a sheep would make a tasty meal, she walks up to the house where the farmer is sitting on the front porch and asks him if she can guess how many sheep there are if she can have one. The farmer agrees. The woman has a knack for counting and adds up all the sheep really quickly and says "72". The farmer says "whelp, that's right, go grab your sheep and leave." The woman picks up her choice and starts walking back to her car, but before she gets in the farmer shouts after her "If I can guess your real hair color, can I have my dog back?"

A balding, white haired man from Bellville, in Cape Town

walked into a jewellery store in Tygervalley this past Friday evening with a beautiful much younger blond at his side.
He told the jeweler he was looking for a special ring for his girlfriend. The jeweler looked through his stock and brought out a $5,000 ring.
The man said, 'No, I'd like to see something more special.'
At that statement, the jeweler went to his special stock and brought another ring over. 'Here's a stunning ring at only $240,000 the jeweler said. The lady's eyes sparkled and her whole body trembled with excitement. The old man seeing this said, 'We'll take it.'
The jeweler asked how payment would be made and the man stated, 'by check. I know you need to make sure my check is good, so I'll write it now and you can call the bank Monday to verify the funds and I'll pick the ring up Monday afternoon.'
On Monday morning, the jeweler angrily phoned the old man and said 'There's no money in that account.'
'I know,' said the old man,
'But let me tell you about MY GREAT WEEKEND!'

Blonde Jokes

What do you call it when a blonde dyes her hair brown?
artificial intelligence
What do you call it when a blonde dyes her hair red?
Selling her soul for intelligence

So there's this magical mountain...

...where people jump off, and land in a pool of whatever they yell. There are three chicks, a brown-haired girl, and brunette, and a blonde. The brown-haired girl jumps, and yells "CANDY!", and lands in a huge pool of candy. The brunette jumps off and yells "MONEY!", and lands in a pool of money. The blonde jumps and yells "CANNONBALL!".

Blonde tries to buy a TV.

A young blonde lady wants to buy a new Television. She walks into an electronics store, has a quick browse and picks the TV. She pulls the store clerk over and tells him she would like to buy that TV, he replies "Sorry, we do not serve blondes here".
The blonde is disgusted and offended, but she really wanted that TV. She goes home and dyes her hair brown and goes back to the store, she makes sure she finds a different clerk and attempts to buy the TV again, the clerk responds "Sorry, we do not serve blondes here".
The blonde, being extremely confused at this point, utters out "How do you know I am blonde? My hair is brown!"
To which the clerk replies, "because that's not a TV, it's a microwave".

Winter weather emergency

On a bitterly cold winter's morning a husband and wife in the back woods of Minnesota were listening to the radio during breakfast.
They heard the announcer say, "We are going to have 8 to 10 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the even-numbered side of the street, so snow plows can get through conveniently".
So the good wife went out and moved her car as instructed.
A week later while they are eating breakfast again, the radio announcer said, "We are expecting 10 to 12 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the odd-numbered side of the street, so the snow plows can get through." The good wife went out and moved her car again.
The next week they are again having breakfast when the radio
announcer says, "We are expecting 12 to 14 inches of snow today. You must park..." And the power goes off.
The good wife was very upset, and with a worried look on her face she said, "I don't know what to do. Which side of the street do I need to park on so the snow plows can get through?"
With all the love and understanding that men who are married to blondes (and those with grey hair) always exhibit, the husband replied, "Honey, why don't you just leave it in the garage this time."

My buddy has big news...

He comes to me one day and says "Dude, you'll never believe it, I'm b**... twins."
"That's awesome" I reply "but how can you tell them apart?"
"Easy" he says "Marys got long blonde hair and Steves got a moustache."

A blonde goes to get her haircut.

When she sits down onto the chair, the hairdresser notices that she's wearing headphones. The hairdresser asks her to take them off, but she refused. She said, "If I take these off I'll die." The hairdresser was puzzled, but she cuts her hair anyways. While she's getting her haircut, the blonde falls asleep. The hairdresser takes off her headphones, but a few minutes later, the blonde collapses to the floor and dies. The hairdresser was shocked, but also curious as to why those headphones were so important. She puts them on, and she hears a voices saying,"Breathe in, breathe out. Breathe in, breathe out."

A blonde goes to buy a TV.

A blonde goes out to buy a TV at a department store.
Blonde: I'd like that TV please.
Clerk: Sorry, we don't sell to blondes.
So the blonde goes out and dyes her hair brown. She then goes back to the store.
Blonde: I'd like that TV please.
Clerk: I'm sorry but we don't sell to blondes.
Amazed she goes out and dyes her hair ginger. She later returns to the store.
Blonde: I'd like that TV please.
Clerk: I'm sorry, we don't sell to blondes.
Blonde: How did you know I'm blonde?
Clerk: Because that's a Microwave.

I told my girlfriend I was unfaithful

My girlfriend found blonde hair on the passenger seat of my car, so I had to say that I was cheating on her.
How embarrassing would it be if she knew I sold corn on the freeway?

A dumb blonde goes to an electronics store...

...And sees a sign on the front of the store that says "No dumb blondes". Believing she isn't dumb she goes in and asks the man at the counter if she can by one of the televisions that are right behind him. He says no you're a dumb blonde, please leave. So the blonde decides to dye her hair brown and goes back into the store the next day to try and buy the tv. At the counter the man again says that she is a dumb blonde and she needs to leave. So once more the blonde dyes her hair and go to the store, this time with red hair. She gets to the counter and the man again denies her claiming she Is a dumb blonde. Frustrated she exclaims to the man "I've dyed my hair twice to try and fool you so you would let me buy that tv! How could you tell It was me the whole time?" The man then tells her "Because that's not a tv, it's a microwave."

A dumb blonde was really tired

A dumb blonde was really tired of being made fun of, so she decided to dye her hair and look like a brunette. When she had brown hair, she decided to take a drive in the country.
After she had been driving for a while, she saw a farmer and a flock of sheep and thought, "Oh! Those sheep are so adorable!"
She got out and walked over to the farmer and said, "If I can guess how many sheep you have, can I take one home?"
The farmer, being a bit of a gambler himself, said she could have a try.
The blonde looked at the flock and guessed, "157."
The farmer was amazed - she was right! So the blonde, (who looked like a brunette), picked one out and got back into her car. Before she left, the farmer walked up to her and said.
"If I can guess the real color of your hair, can I have my dog back?"

A dumb blonde wearing headphones walks into a hair salon...

She sits down in the waiting area and eventually falls asleep. The stylist takes off the blondes headphones so she will hear when her name is called. When her name is called, the blonde doesn't respond, so the stylist shakes her to wake her up, and the blonde is stone cold dead. When the paramedic arrives, he checks the headphones and says "Well here's the problem." The stylist listens, and the headphones are playing the words "Breathe in. Breathe out." on repeat.

A Chinese man is at a bar

After having a few drinks and loosening up he decides to try at chatting up a cute blonde lady.
He introduces himself and from the start this lady hangs off his every word. She's twirling her hair, shifting in her seat and taking in every word he says.
They spend another hour at the bar before inviting her back to his place. She willingly agrees to come.
The Chinese man can't believe his luck, this chick is a straight 10/10. He takes her home to his apartment, and they get hot 'n heavy while stripping each others clothes off.
All of a sudden the girls face drops and she looks upset.
The Chinese man asks "What's wrong?" to which she responds, "I thought you said you were hung."
"No, I said my name is Hong."

Near Death Experience

I was driving one afternoon with my wife, when as we pulled up to a stop light, a motorcycle rider with long blonde hair pulls past us.
My wife commented "That's a woman riding that bike, cool!"
I replied "So does that make her a BILF?"
"BILF?" she asked.
"You know, a Biker I'd Like to F.."
"Drac73521! You haven't even seen her face, what if she's ugly, would you still want to f her then?" she exclaimed..
"Probably.. I mean I married you after all.."
Doctors tell me I can go home this weekend..

A blonde goes into a store to buy a TV

She immediately sees one that, when turned on, has great sound and visuals. She tells the manager, "I'd like to purchase this TV please. "
The manager replies, "Sorry, but I don't sell to blondes."
The blonde is insulted, but decides that the TV is worth it. So she dyes her hair red and puts on extra makeup. She finds the manager again and says, "I am interested in this TV. How much for it?"
Once again, the manager replies, "Sorry, but I don't sell to blondes."
Frustrated, the blonde re-dyes her hair brown, cuts it short, and goes into the store with oversized sunglasses. "I want to purchase this TV," she says to the manager in a heavy accent.
"Ma'am," he said, "I told you I don't sell to blondes!"
"I've tried every disguise," cried the blonde. "How do you still know I'm blonde?"
"Because, ma'am, that's a microwave."

What do you name the kid of a British super spy and girl with yellow hair?

James Blonde

I hate people who make fun of my blond hair and blue eyes

They are so master-racist

s**... with twins

Two guys are at a bar. One of them looks to the other and says, "I had the best time last night. I had s**... with twins!" The other asks, "How could you tell them apart?" "Well, Jessica had long, beautiful, blonde hair, and Alex had a goatee.

Peter is different

A couple have 13 children, 12 of them are blonde and have blue eyes, 1 has black hair and brown eyes, his name is Peter. One day the wife of the couple is dying of illness, her husband is sitting on her bed. The husband says "Our Peter is different from the other kids, does he have a different father?" His wife says yes. And, the man says, "Then, who is his dad?" Upon which his wife says, "You".

What has blonde hair, blue eyes and tends to ailed animals?

A VeterinArian.

I told my blond friend, that they have higher risk of cancer.

The next day she colored her hair black.
courtesy: Choke by Chuck palahniuk

What happened after h**... dyed his hair blonde?

He became a Super Aryian.

Labor union joke

A labor union organizer goes to a w**... and asks the madam if the girls are in a union. "Sorry," she replies, so he leaves.
He goes to a second w**..., and again asks the madam if the girls are in a union. When told they are not, he asks, "How can I spend my money here when you do not share your profits with your labor?" and leaves.
He goes to a third w**... and again asks the madam if the girls are in a union. "They are," the madam proudly replies. "Great," he says. "I'll go with that cute little blonde over there." "You can't," the madam says. "You have to go with the old grey-haired lady over there. She has seniority."

A blond is tired

A blond gets tired of blond jokes, so she dyes her hair. She goes for a ride and comes across a farmer with a flock of sheep. She asks the farmer, "If I can guess the exact number of sheep in your flock, can I take one home?" The farmer accepts. The blond guesses, "382". The farmer says, "Wow, that's correct. Pick any one you want!" She looks over the entire flock before picking one and putting it in her car. The farmer then says, "I have an offer for you. If I can guess the real color of your hair, can I have my dog back?"

"Did you hear about that actress who stabbed her husband in the news today?"

"Oh my goodness, no, who was it?"
"It was a little blonde haired woman, I always forget her last name though. The first name is Reese."
"Witherspoon?"
"No, with her knife."

[Long]Three Toronto surgeons were playing golf together

and discussing surgeries they had performed..
 
One of them said, "I'm the best surgeon in Ontario. In my favorite case, a concert pianist lost seven fingers in an accident; 
I reattached them, and 8 months later he performed a private concert for the Queen of England.
 
The second surgeon said.. "That's nothing. A young man lost an arm and both legs in an accident; 
I reattached them, and 2 years later he won a gold Medal in track and field events in the Olympics.
 
The third surgeon said, "You guys are amateurs . Several years ago a man was high on c**... and m**... 
and he rode a horse head-on into a train traveling 80 miles an hour. 
All I had left to work with was the man's  blonde hair and the Horse's a**.... 
I was able to put them together and now he's running for President of the U..S.A!"

What did the midget say hugging the blonde's leg?

Your hair smells nice

A blonde woman dyes her hair red....

A blonde woman dyes her hair red because she's tired of the blonde jokes. One day she stops by a farm and asks the farmer, "If I can count how many sheep you have, can I keep one?" The farmer reluctantly agrees. After some counting, the blonde woman says, "there is 124 sheep in your farm." Shocked, the farmer counts them. Sure enough, there are 124 sheep. The woman picks one up and takes it to her car. Right when she's about to leave, the farmer knocks on her window and asks,"Ma'am, if I can guess your real hair color, can I have my dog back?"

My mate told me yesterday that he's started dating twins!

I asked how he could tell which one is which.
He said, 'Well, Andrea is really, really attractive - she has long blonde hair, sparkling blue eyes and plump red lips. Plus she's got a really nice body. Pretty much a perfect ten.
And Brian has a c**....'

What did the blonde haired, blue eyed soldier become when he left the army?

A veteran a**....

I asked a blonde haired, blue eyed soldier what he wanted to do after the military...

He said he just wants to get back home.
He wants to be a veteran a**....

All these jokes about being blonde linked with low intelligence...

Don't you think the idea sounds a bit hair-brained?

A man approached Captain Von Trap and said, "No offense, but is that short haired blonde single?"

"Nun taken."

A blonde woman walks into a shop

A blonde woman walks into a shop and says
"I'd like to buy that tv"
The man replies
"You cannot"
The woman replies
"Why not?"
The man says "because you're blonde"
So, the woman walks out and dyes her hair brown and returns later that day. She says to the man
"I'd like to buy that tv"
He replies
"You cant because you're blonde"
She says
"What?! How do you know??!"
He says
Because that's not a TV that's a microwave"

A blonde decides to buy a TV

She walks into a store and asks for a TV. The shopkeeper says "We don't sell to blondes."
She gets angry and dyes her hair black. Tomorrow she comes into the same shop, and asks for a TV. The shopkeeper says again, "We don't sell to blondes."
"How did you know I was blonde?"
"This is a microwave store."

James Bond gets called into M's office

M: I have a job for you. You will have to disguise yourself as a blond businessman called John Smith.
Bond: But I have dark hair! Do you expect me to wear a wig or something?!
M: No mister Bond, I expect you to dye.

I was on OkCupid and a girl said "Blonde haired immigrant here to steal your jobs."

I was like hahaha jokes on you. I don't have a job...
Dang it.

3 blondes are stuck...

3 blondes are stuck on a river bank and can't cross it. They find a bottle in the sand, and as they open it, a genie pops out.
"I will promise you 3 wishes. Pick carefully." Says the genie.
"I want a boat." Says the first one. The genie grants her wish, but the river current is too powerful and she drifts away to her death.
"I want a motorboat." Announces the second blonde. However, it had no fuel. Off she goes to die.
"I want black hair." Says the third one, and then she crosses the bridge.

3 cousins are together talking about their names. The first, a raven haired beauty, says "when my mother was pregnant a rose fell from a bush and landed on her stomach so she named me Rose".

The second, a beautiful blonde, says, "when my mother was pregnant a violet landed on her stomach, so she named me Violet".
She turns to the 3rd cousin, a small crippled girl in a wheelchair, "how did u get your name, Piano??".

Three moms are talking and having lunch together...

One mom had black hair, the next was brunette, and the third was blonde.
The black haired mom says "You guys won't believe what I found in my daughters room yesterday. A cigarette! I've never even smoked."
The brunette mom says "You won't believe what I found in *my* daughters room yesterday. Whiskey! I've never even drank."
The blonde mom says "Well guess what I found in *my* daughters room yesterday. A c**...! I've never even had s**... before."

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these blond haired jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.