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Blender Up Jokes

122 blender up jokes and hilarious blender up puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about blender up that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Blender Up Short Jokes

Short blender up jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The blender up humour may include short blender jokes also.

  1. When I was five, my Dad put Snowballs in the blender to make a slushie... I miss snowballs, she was a good cat.
  2. And the lord said unto John, "Come forth and you will receive eternal life" John came fifth and won a blender
  3. Did you hear about the day when Hagrid took Harry, mashed him up, put him in a blender with ice cream and drank him? Yer a Blizzard, Harry.
  4. News anchor: The CDC has advised no handshakes at this time. Cannibal: "Aww..." *STOPS BLENDER*
  5. I ordered a new blender but they sent me one that had clearly been used. Seems like there was a mix up at the store.
  6. Leading a horse to water is easy. How do you make a horse drink? Put it in a blender with some ice.
  7. What's green and red and goes 100 miles an hour? A frog in a blender.
    This joke brought to you by one of my first grade students who loudly shared it at lunch this week.
  8. I walked into a pet shop and said, "Excuse me, do you have any blenders?" The man said "yes" and handed me a chameleon.
  9. A blue man gives you a pineapple. A man with a horse for a head gives you a blender. A man with seven feet on each leg gives you a dragonfruit. What do you have? Schizophrenia.
  10. I put a bunch of X and Y chromosomes into a blender, and made a liquid of them. It's genderfluid.

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Blender Up One Liners

Which blender up one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with blender up? I can suggest the ones about haircut up and carrot up.

  1. Wife: I regret getting you that blender for Christmas Me: *sipping toast* why?
  2. This blender I just bought doesn't seem to be working right I keep getting mixed results
  3. What is green but turns red when you push the button A frog in a blender
  4. What do you get when you put your hand in a blender? A hand shake.
  5. How do you make a baby drink? You stick it in a blender.
  6. What happens when you put two gay guys in a blender? It becomes a Grindr
  7. Mom: "I regret getting you that blender for your birthday" Me: (with liquid toast): Why?
  8. What happens when you put your hand in a blender? You get a handshake!
  9. what do you call a cat in a blender? Meow Mix
  10. What do you call a globtrotter after you put him in a blender? A Harlem shake.
  11. I got stuck in a blender. Pour me...
  12. Tonight I am going to reveal my new kitchen appliance It'll be a blender reveal party
  13. Why did the blonde put her iPad in the blender? She wanted apple juice.
  14. What do you call an experimental monkey in a blender? Rhesus pieces........
  15. Did you hear about the little person who got stuck in a blender? He was a midget spinner

Blender Up Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.

What funny jokes about blender up you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean honeymoon up jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make blender up pranks.

What do you call a blender full of laboratory monkeys? Rhesus pieces.

Q: Why do you put babies into a blender feet first?
A: So you can see the look in their eyes when you turn it on!

Q: How do you get a zombie baby into a bowl?
A: A blender.
Q: How do you get them out?
A: Doritos.

How do you fit 500 babies into a phone booth?
With a blender.
How do you get them out?
Nachos - make a dipping and snacking motion.

Q: How many dead babies can you fit in a blender?
A: I don't know, I just like to hear them scream.
Q: How do you get them out?
A: Chips.

Q: What did the baby say as I threw it in the blender?
A: I didn't catch it, I was too busy m**....

Why are men like blenders? You need one, but you're not quite sure why.

I've been conducting a survey on the general public's thoughts on blenders.

So far it has had mixed reactions.

What sound does a baby make when you put it in a blender?

I don't know, I'm always too busy m**....

Appliances

My wife has made me buy an electric bread maker, electric stove, electric blender, electric toaster and other appliances. Now she's complaining that we have too many appliances and nowhere to sit down. So I bought her an electric chair.

What's green and goes red at a flick of a switch.

Kermit in a blender.

From John bishops only joking

Did you hear about the local blender company?
They went into liquidation

What do you call a gay Nobel Prize Laureate in a blender?

A homogeneous mixture.

How do you get 1000 dead babies into a phone booth?

A blender.
How do you get them out?
Tostitos

What do you get when you shove an iPhone into a blender?

Apple Sauce

The police break into a blender's apartment.

The police point their guns at the blender and say "Freeze! You've been charged with first degree m**...!".
The blender frantically responds " Wait officers, this is a big mix-up!

Why do you always stick a baby in a blender feet first?

so you can see the expression on its face.

Lame joke I made one night. What do you get when you mix a cat and a blender?

A visit from the cops.

What would Gregor Mendel pray for if he had a blender for his experiments?

Whirled Peas

What's pink and red and goes 100MPH.

A baby in a blender.

My mother wanted to return the blender that we gave her for Christmas because she already has two.

5tJhWOdRHeyMDKtrMuoRjRjaL0cneSnoqWLpJlHZTmk40j92nFPS7XNivFZMgx

How do you fit 100 dead babies in a barrel?

with a blender.
How do you get them out?
With a straw.

My father used to put snowballs in the blender and make great slushies

Snowballs was a great cat

A freind tells me she's going to buy a blender called the ninja master.

I told her she should get the taichi master instead.
It gives more yang for your buck.

My dad put snowballs in the blender

I miss snowballs he was a great cat

How do you get 100 babies into a bowl?

A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla chips

What do you call a Canadian that's been run through a blender?

Puré-eh

What's better than 7 dead babies in a blender?

A dead baby in 7 blenders.

As a kid, I put snowballs in the blender to make a slushy.

Snowballs was a good cat...

How do you make...

How do you make a dead baby float?
With a scoop of ice cream.
How do you make a dead baby shake?
Cup of milk
2 cups of fruit
A dead baby and a blender
How do you make a dead baby split?
A sharp axe and a strong swing.

How do you get a whole baby in a blender?

Turn it on.

How do you make a dog drink?

Just throw it in the blender.

I've decided to keep my blender on the top shelf.

It's a high whisk strategy.

Why did Jeffrey d**... keep a blender on his front porch?

To greet people with a handshake.

Why does Jeffrey d**... have a blender on his front porch?

So when he gets visitors, he can greet them with a hand shake!

What does a baby in a blender sound like?

Idk i was too busy laughing.

Why did Jeffery d**... have a blender on his front porch?

So he could greet you with a handshake.

My dad once put snowballs in the blender to make a smoothie.

Snowballs was a great cat.

Did you hear about that airplane that mixed all those people around the cabin like a blender?

That flight was not smoothie

How do you make a dog drink?

Put it in a blender

I gave up on fitness and angrily buried my juicer. I was livid when my friend dug it up again and told me to man up.

Did you just exhume my blender?

What did one man say when he put french fries in a blender and dumped the resulting liquid onto an unsuspecting victim?

SLURP-FRIES!

I like to start my mornings with a nice warm cup of Joe...

...But d**..., his fingers keep clogging up my blender!

Today I tried making salsa by putting some pico de gallo into a blender.

It ended up making femto de gallo.

Why do you get when you put an iPhone into a blender?

Apple juice

How do you get a baby in a blender?

Feet first. How do you get them out? Fritos

What happens when Harry Potter is put in a blender?

ex-p-p-p-e-l-i-a-r-m-m-m-m-u-s-s-s-s-s-s--s-s-s-s-s

I gave my sister a blender and a can of peas for christmas

Whirled peas

If you lead a horse to a blender...

...then you can make a horse-drink.

And god said come forth and revive eternal life ...

But he came fifth and won a blender

What's black and white and read all over?

A newspaper.
What's black and white and red all over?
A nun in a blender.

What do you get when a white guy, a black guy, and a hispanic guy all fall into a giant blender together?

A racial slurry.

My father was really traumatised after he fell into a blender.

In fact, he turned to drink.

How do you get a blended baby out the blender?

Nachos.

What do you call a vegan who has diarrhea?

A smoothie blender.

What do you get when you mix a hypocrite, Catholic, and comedian into a blender?

Louis c**...

What do you call 10 smurfs in a blender?

Blue Man Goop

What do you call it when a kitchen appliance salesman gets into a minor vehicular accident?

A blender vendor in a fender bender

How do you stop a baby crying?

Put it in the blender

Why don't dogs and cats mix?

Their bones clog up the blender.

I wanted to buy a blender off the internet but I didn't

because it had mixed reviews.

What's black, white and red all over?

A skunk in a blender. I will admit it smells terrible.

How do you get 100 babies out of a blender?

Tostitos.

How do you get 100 republicans into a bucket?

With a blender.