Blender Up Jokes
105 blender up jokes and hilarious blender up puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about blender up that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Blender Up Short Jokes
Short blender up jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The blender up humour may include short blender jokes also.
- When I was five, my Dad put Snowballs in the blender to make a slushie... I miss snowballs, she was a good cat.
- News anchor: The CDC has advised no handshakes at this time. Cannibal: "Aww..." *STOPS BLENDER*
- I ordered a new blender but they sent me one that had clearly been used. Seems like there was a mix up at the store.
- Leading a horse to water is easy. How do you make a horse drink? Put it in a blender with some ice.
- What's green and red and goes 100 miles an hour? A frog in a blender.
This joke brought to you by one of my first grade students who loudly shared it at lunch this week. - I walked into a pet shop and said, "Excuse me, do you have any blenders?" The man said "yes" and handed me a chameleon.
- A blue man gives you a pineapple. A man with a horse for a head gives you a blender. A man with seven feet on each leg gives you a dragonfruit. What do you have? Schizophrenia.
- I put a bunch of X and Y chromosomes into a blender, and made a liquid of them. It's genderfluid.
- I've decided to keep my blender on the top shelf. It's a high whisk strategy.
- What is red and rare? Kid in a blender.
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Blender Up One Liners
Which blender up one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with blender up? I can suggest the ones about haircut up and carrot up.
- Wife: I regret getting you that blender for Christmas Me: *sipping toast* why?
- This blender I just bought doesn't seem to be working right I keep getting mixed results
- What is green but turns red when you push the button A frog in a blender
- What do you get when you put your hand in a blender? A hand shake.
- what do you call a cat in a blender? Meow Mix
- Tonight I am going to reveal my new kitchen appliance It'll be a blender reveal party
- Why did the blonde put her iPad in the blender? She wanted apple juice.
- What do you call an experimental monkey in a blender? Rhesus pieces........
- What's green and goes red at a flick of a switch. Kermit in a blender.
- What's green and red, and spins at 1,000 RPM? A frog in a blender.
- Why don't dogs and cats mix? Their bones clog up the blender.
- My ex's brain is like a blender It's not always on, but when it is it's stirring up sh*t.
- What do you get when you shove an iPhone into a blender? Apple Sauce
- I wanted to buy a blender off the internet but I didn't because it had mixed reviews.
- How do you make a dog drink? Put it in a blender
Blender Up Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about blender up you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean honeymoon up jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make blender up pranks.
Q: How do you get a zombie baby into a bowl?
A: A blender.
Q: How do you get them out?
A: Doritos.
How do you fit 500 babies into a phone booth?
With a blender.
How do you get them out?
Nachos - make a dipping and snacking motion.
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Q: What did the baby say as I threw it in the blender?
A: I didn't catch it, I was too busy m**....
Why are men like blenders? You need one, but you're not quite sure why.
I've been conducting a survey on the general public's thoughts on blenders.
So far it has had mixed reactions.
Appliances
My wife has made me buy an electric bread maker, electric stove, electric blender, electric toaster and other appliances. Now she's complaining that we have too many appliances and nowhere to sit down. So I bought her an electric chair.
A riddle: it's yellow and if you push the button it turns red...
A chick in a blender.
From John bishops only joking
Did you hear about the local blender company?
They went into liquidation
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What do you call a globtrotter after you put him in a blender?
A Harlem shake.
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What do you call a gay Nobel Prize Laureate in a blender?
A homogeneous mixture.
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How do you get 1000 dead babies into a phone booth?
A blender.
How do you get them out?
Tostitos
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The police break into a blender's apartment.
The police point their guns at the blender and say "Freeze! You've been charged with first degree m**...!".
The blender frantically responds " Wait officers, this is a big mix-up!
Lame joke I made one night. What do you get when you mix a cat and a blender?
A visit from the cops.
What would Gregor Mendel pray for if he had a blender for his experiments?
Whirled Peas
What's pink and red and goes 100MPH.
A baby in a blender.
I thought I fell in love with my blender
...but now I have mixed feelings
My mother wanted to return the blender that we gave her for Christmas because she already has two.
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This is a dark one! A black baby, pickle and a blender. what do you get?
A Nickle!
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How do you fit 100 dead babies in a barrel?
with a blender.
How do you get them out?
With a straw.
A freind tells me she's going to buy a blender called the ninja master.
I told her she should get the taichi master instead.
It gives more yang for your buck.
patrick swayze says:
nobody puts baby in a blender!!!!
how do you get 100 babies in a trash can?
blender!...
how do you get them back out?
...
doritos!
How many babies can fit in a blender?
Depends how powerful the blender is
What do you call a crime-solving blender.
Deducer
How do you get 100 babies into a bowl?
A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla chips
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I got stuck in a blender.
Pour me...
What do you call a Canadian that's been run through a blender?
Puré-eh
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Did you hear about the day when Hagrid took Harry, mashed him up, put him in a blender with ice cream and drank him?
Yer a Blizzard, Harry.
How many babies can fit in a blender?
Three and a half.
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How do you make...
How do you make a dead baby float?
With a scoop of ice cream.
How do you make a dead baby shake?
Cup of milk
2 cups of fruit
A dead baby and a blender
How do you make a dead baby split?
A sharp axe and a strong swing.
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How do you get a whole baby in a blender?
Turn it on.
I have a blender, I have an IPad...
UH! Apple Juice.
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How do you make a baby drink?
You stick it in a blender.
What does a baby in a blender sound like?
Idk i was too busy laughing.
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What do you get if you put a baby in a blender..
An e**.....
Did you hear about that airplane that mixed all those people around the cabin like a blender?
That flight was not smoothie
I like my women like I like my smoothies
In a blender.
I gave up on fitness and angrily buried my juicer. I was livid when my friend dug it up again and told me to man up.
Did you just exhume my blender?
What is yellow at first and then red all over?
A little chicken, in a blender: Prrrrrrrrrr....!!!!
What did one man say when he put french fries in a blender and dumped the resulting liquid onto an unsuspecting victim?
SLURP-FRIES!
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I like to start my mornings with a nice warm cup of Joe...
...But d**..., his fingers keep clogging up my blender!
A husband thinks his wife is cheating on him so he asks her to turn on the blender...
when he calls her on his lunch break at work.
The husband calls, asks if she's home, and if she could turn on the blender for proof.
She turns it on.
The next day, the husband calls again.
The wife turns on the blender.
The next day, husband calls, wife turns on the blender.
At the end of the week the husband comes home early from work. His wife's car isn't in the driveway.
He goes to his daughter, "Where's your mom??"
"She left a while ago. I don't know how long she's going to be. It could be a long time because she took the blender with her."
Today I tried making salsa by putting some pico de gallo into a blender.
It ended up making femto de gallo.
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Did you hear about the little person who got stuck in a blender?
He was a midget spinner
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What happens when Harry Potter is put in a blender?
ex-p-p-p-e-l-i-a-r-m-m-m-m-u-s-s-s-s-s-s--s-s-s-s-s
I gave my sister a blender and a can of peas for christmas
Whirled peas
If you lead a horse to a blender...
...then you can make a horse-drink.
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What happens when you put two gay guys in a blender?
It becomes a Grindr
How do you make an apple smoothie?
Put an iPhone in a blender
My father was really traumatised after he fell into a blender.
In fact, he turned to drink.
How do you get a blended baby out the blender?
Nachos.
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What do you get when you mix a hypocrite, Catholic, and comedian into a blender?
Louis c**...
What do you call 10 smurfs in a blender?
Blue Man Goop
What do you call it when a kitchen appliance salesman gets into a minor vehicular accident?
A blender vendor in a fender bender
How do you stop a baby crying?
Put it in the blender
What do a microphone and a gender swapped person's blender have in common?
They're both transducers.
What's black, white and red all over?
A skunk in a blender. I will admit it smells terrible.
How do you get 100 republicans into a bucket?
With a blender.
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What's green and red and goes a hundred miles an hour?
A frog in a blender.
What happens when you add milk?
Frog n**....
I frough away my firff.
Got a blender for Chrifmaf.
Jealous husband
Jealous husband: "My wife where are you?"
Wife: "At home love."
Husband: "Are you sure?"
Wife: "Yes"
Husband: "Turn on the blender."
Wife: (turns blender on) reeereeeereeee
Husband: "Ok my love goodbye."
Another day, Jealous husband: "My wife where are you?"
Wife: "At home love."
Husband: "Are you sure?"
Wife: "Yes"
Husband: "Turn on the blender."
Wife: (turns blender on) reeereeeereeee
Husband: "Ok my love goodbye."
The next day, the husband decides to go home without notice, finds his son alone and asks him "Son, where is your mother?"
Son: "I don't know, she went out with the blender….."
What do you get if you put a duck in a blender?
A quackamole
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why did Jeffrey d**... keep a blender on his front porch?
So he could greet visitors with a handshake.