Bleach Jokes

71 bleach jokes and hilarious bleach puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about bleach that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

If you're looking for a good laugh, check out these hilarious Bleach jokes! Enjoy jokes about the popular anime, manga and memes featuring the beloved characters from this franchise. Escape from reality with funny jokes about bleach, bleaching hair, liquid, seltzer, detergent and other bleach related topics.

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Funniest Bleach Short Jokes

Short bleach jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The bleach humour may include short chlorine jokes also.

  1. All of the flags on the moon have been bleached white by the radiation from the sun.. .. making it officially French territory.
  2. I thought I had Covid 19 so I decided to give it a go and I injected myself with bleach... Surprisingly I'm all white now.
  3. Trump just suggested that injecting sanitizers like bleach might have a cleansing effect on the body I think medical research would agree that injecting bleach definitely cures stupidity.
  4. Did you know that prostitutes at the Moulin Rouge used strong alcoholic drinks to bleach their hair? Absinthe makes the tart grow blonder.
  5. I was feeling down the other day, so I threw some bleach over my Muslim friend... I thought it'd lighten Mahmood.
  6. What's the difference between a suicidal ghost hunter and a weaboo alcohol taster? One drinks bleach and watches spirits; the other drinks spirits and watches Bleach.
  7. I find it wild that people would use cleaning products on their skeletons. But to bleach their bone, I guess.
  8. Did you know that the American flag on the moon was bleached due to solar radiation? Now it looks like the French landed there first
  9. Nerdy pickup line Hey baby, are you a compressed file format, because rar.
    ^^^^^now ^^^^^where ^^^^^did ^^^^^I ^^^^^put ^^^^^the ^^^^^bleach...
  10. I bleached my hair on my 18th birthday. "I guess now you're legally blonde," my dad chuckled.

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Bleach One Liners

Which bleach one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with bleach? I can suggest the ones about sponge and cleaner.

  1. What do you call a band of albinos The bleach boys
  2. back in my day we use to drink bleach straight boy have the tides turned
  3. Why did the Romans bring bleach to Jesus's crucifixion? To prevent cross contamination.
  4. What is Trump's favourite anime? Bleach
  5. Why do people bleach their buttholes? They want to change their ring tone
  6. Well, I just injected myself with bleach Now we wai—
  7. If you're ever having trouble with Chemistry, just remember... Bleach is a solution
  8. I used to inject bleach, but not anymore. I'm clean now.
  9. What do you call a bunch of janitors who made a band? The bleach boys.
  10. What happens if you drink bleach? You *basically* die.
  11. What do you get when you combine Mr Clean with a 60's surf band? The Bleach Boys
  12. How does a Jedi wash their clothing? With midi-chlorine bleach.
  13. What is a suicidal Weebs favorite anime? Bleach.
  14. It's almost summer! Time for Americans to start getting bleach body ready
  15. How are police and bleach similar? They're both great at taking out the black.

Bleach Anime Jokes

Here is a list of funny bleach anime jokes and even better bleach anime puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Fun fact about bleach Bleach is the only Anime that you can drink.
  • What's Jacob Sartorius' Favourite Anime? Bleach.
  • What is Amanda Todd's favorite anime? Bleach
  • Play Anime Bleach game online
Bleach joke, Play Anime Bleach game online

Heartwarming Bleach Jokes that Make You Laugh

What funny jokes about bleach you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean breathing blonde jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make bleach pranks.

What do a 14 year old and an open bucket of bleach have in common?

For twenty bucks either'll take care of your toddler.
-&y (yup, mine)

LPT: Don't waste a bit more money for the brand-name bleach; it isn't any different than the bargain brand

They taste exactly the same

The legal system is like bleach,

Works perfectly for w**..., but not with colors.

Do you know the worst part about drinking bleach?

It never gets pass the noose.

What did the t-shirt say when it got bleach spilled on it.

"It's all white"

What's white and smells like bleach?


What was Amanda Todds favorite cocktail?

s**... on the bleach.

So, I asked my younger sister if she knew what bleach was.

"The drink?"

Progress is amazing. "w**... Only" is in the past

This new color safe bleach is fantastic.

Have you heard of bleach?

I hear the taste is to die for.

How are a gene pool and a swimming pool similar?

Sometimes you have to use bleach to keep it clean.

Bleach Is Racist

It says w**... only on the bottle

Free s**...

So this girl came up to me and she said she would have s**... with me and all I had to do was advertise some cleaner, but I didn't, because my will is strong, just as strong as Lysol cleaner with bleach. Perfect for killing bacteria in the kitchen, bathroom, and all over the house.

What did Invader Zim say to the bottle of Sodium Hydroxide that had "Bleach" written on it?


Him: "Well, at least I know you wouldn't in a million years purposely destroy my clothes with bleach." Me: "Yeah, because I'm not crazy."

Him: "No, because it's too much like doing laundry."

Someone once told me to drink bleach to quickly clean me out for a drug test. What an idiot...

The emergency room nurse said I still had drugs in my system when I woke up...

What does the spirit say to the dirty counter?

I am the clorax
I speak for the bleach.

Can drinking bleach really kill you? We asked our listeners to try it out and none of them called back to tell me they're dead so I think not

One of my fav quote from C&H

Bleach of the priest joke

A clergyman in the USA is believed to be the first man to die as a result of following President Trump’s ill advised comments about injecting disinfectant.
His wife has been arrested and charged with causing a bleach of the priest, and domestos a**...!

If coronavirus doesn't get you, injecting bleach might!

My have the tides turned

Decades later our kids would be asking us.

Dad, why did y'all have to write "do not drink" on a bleach bottle?

Well, if you inject yourself with bleach and disinfectant...

I guarantee you won't die of Covid-19

Trump may be right about bleach...

The U.S. already uses it on chickens, why not use it on sheep?

I am not very political but it seem to me that Trump's suggestion to drink Chlorox bleach...

is grounds for Imbleachment.

It's has finally happened. A Pastor has died in the US after injecting himself with disinfectant.

President Trump is being charged with a bleach of the priest.

Vietnam vs COVID

What do the Vietnam War and COVID-19 have in common in the USA?
Agent Orange is responsible of a lot of birth defects even years after it ends.

Stay Safe, don't inject Bleach!

What's Donald Trump's favourite cocktail?

s**... on the bleach.

Covid Smoothie

Me Ex Wife dropped off a Covid smoothie for me.
Because she still cares for me, she used organic bleach.

Last night someone broke into my house and stole all of my soap, bleach, and shampoo.

They made a clean getaway

Bleach joke, I bleached my hair on my 18th birthday.

jokes about bleach