Blank Jokes
111 blank jokes and hilarious blank puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about blank that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Blank Short Jokes
Short blank jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The blank humour may include short empty jokes also.
- I just bought a thesaurus and when I got it home, all the pages were blank. I have no words to describe how angry I am.
- I received a thesaurus in the mail today, but when I opened it all the pages were blank. I have no words to describe how angry I am.
- I ordered a Thesaurus recently, when it arrived all the pages were blank I have no words to describe my anger
- I just bought a thesaurus I just bought a thesaurus from the book store, however when I got home I found that all the pages were blank! I have no words to describe how angry I am.
- I got a thesaurus the other day, but all the pages were blank. I have no words to describe how angry I am!
- My Dad got me a thesaurus for Christmas last year But when I opened it every single page was blank.
I didn't have the words to describe how angry I was. - The dictionary I ordered on eBay had only blank pages I have no words to describe how angry I am.
- The other day I bought a thesaurus. I opened it up and all the pages were blank. I have no words to describe how upset I was.
- I just bought a new dictionary at my local book store, but when I got home the pages were blank... I have no words to describe how angry I am.
- I finally bought the limited edition thesaurus that I've always wanted. When I opened it, all the pages were blank. I have no words to describe how angry I am.
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Blank One Liners
Which blank one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with blank? I can suggest the ones about dummy and void.
- Last night I played a blank tape at full volume. The mime next door went nuts.
- Does anyone know how to draw a very realistic bullet? Because I'm drawing a blank.
- I told my carpenter I didn't want carpeted steps. He gave me a blank stair.
- I played a blank CD at full blast yesterday ...the mimes next door went nuts.
- I love watching kids running in the park... They have no idea I'm shooting blanks
- I bought Nickelback's greatest hits And it was just a blank CD.
- I want to publish a do-it-yourself book, all the pages will be blank.
- Your mama is so ugly…. Her passport photo says This Page Left Intentionaly Blank.
- I bought the latest edition of "Reading For Dummies" The pages were all blank!
- Teacher: Why is your paper blank? Me: Sometimes silence is the best answer.
- So I ordered the Best of Pitbull CD off Amazon. All I got was a blank CD.
- I like watching children run around at the park. They don't realize I'm using blanks.
- I see Alec Baldwin is having a seventh child He clearly doesn't shoot blanks
- I orderd a book from IKEA Got a book with a blank pages and a pen
- I was struggling to think of the easiest things to draw today. So far I've drawn a blank.
Blank Pages Jokes
Here is a list of funny blank pages jokes and even better blank pages puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Amazon I ordered a thesaurus from Amazon but when it was delivered all the pages were blank.
I have no words to describe how angry I am. - I finally bought the limited edition Thesaurus from Amazon that I've always wanted. When I opened it, all the pages were blank. I have no words to describe how angry I am.
- The other day I bought a thesaurus, but when I opened it, all the pages were blank I have no words to describe how angry I am.
- Yesterday I bought a thesaurus, but when I got home and opened it, all the pages were blank... I have no words to describe how angry I am.
- Pls don't make me woosh I bought a dictionary but when I got home and opened it the pages were all blank.
I have no words to describe how angry I am 😡 - Amazon Thesaurus I ordered a thesaurus from Amazon, but when it was delivered all the pages were blank.
I have no words to describe how angry I am - I bought a thesaurus from Walmart and the pages were blank.. I have no words to describe how angry I am
- The other day I bought a thesaurus The other day I bought a thesaurus, but when I got home and opened it, all the pages were blank… I have no words to describe how angry I am.
- The pages of my dictionary were blank I have no words.
- I bought a self-help book on 'how to handle disappointment' When I turned the pages, they were all blank.
Experience Instant Grins & Giggles with Playful Blank Jokes
What funny jokes about blank you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean unfinished jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make blank pranks.
Fill in the blank: Friends are like_____
mine is "Friends are like trees, if you hit them with an axe they fall over."
Woof
A German Shepherd went to a Western Union telegram office, took out a blank form and wrote:
"Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof."
The clerk examined the paper and politely told the dog, "There are only nine words here. You could send another "Woof" for the same price."
"But," the dog replied, "That would make no sense at all."
What's the best joke you know that's kid-safe?
I know plenty of raunchy jokes, but was asked this recently and came up blank
My dad's favourite joke.
This is the joke that my dad has been telling for as long as I can remember:
A robber goes into a McDonald's and points a gun at the cashier. "This is a robbery. Give me all the money!" The cashier looks at him with a blank stare and says: "Would you like fries with that?"
Job Interview
A games programmer is at a job interview at Electronic Arts.
As the interview comes to an end, the interviewer glances down at the programmer's résumé and sees "please turn over" written at the bottom.
He turns the résumé over, but finds that the other side is blank.
The interviewer asks, "Where's the rest of your résumé?"
The programmer replies, "Oh, that's downloadable content; it costs an extra ten dollars!"
What did the blanket say to the bed?
Don't worry, I've got you covered.
How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb?
None . They'll get a man to do it and complain about patriarchy.
On second thought should have just made the title feminism and left the body blank. It's a joke in and of itself.
Two fill in the blank jokes for your particular rivalry.
1. What's the difference between a girl from _______ and a parrot?
You can teach a parrot to say no.
2. Did you hear that _________ school library burnt down?
They lost both books. One of them hadn't even been colored in yet.
Please enter your new password
WINDOWS: Please enter your new password.
USER: cabbage
WINDOWS: Sorry, the password must be more than 8 characters.
USER: boiled cabbage
WINDOWS: Sorry, the password must contain 1 numerical character.
USER: 1 boiled cabbage
WINDOWS: Sorry, the password cannot have blank spaces.
USER: 50bloodyboiledcabbages
WINDOWS: Sorry, the password must contain at least one upper case character.
USER: 50BLOODYboiledcabbages
WINDOWS: Sorry, the password cannot use more than one upper case character consecutively.
USER: 50BloodyBoiledCabbagesShovedUpYourAssIfYouDon'tGiveMeAccessNow!
WINDOWS: Sorry, the password cannot contain punctuation.
USER:ReallyPissedOff50BloodyBoiledCabbagesShovedUpYourAssIf
YouDontGiveMeAccessNow
WINDOWS: Sorry, that password is already in use.
Can anyone remember how to paint the Invisible Man?
I've drawn a blank
There once was a boy named "Odd."
People made fun of him because of his name, so he decided to keep his gravestone blank when he died.
Now when people pass by the burial site, they point and say, "That's odd."
God had asked Jesus and the Devil to type out their quarterly reviews...
They are almost finished when suddenly, the power goes out. When it comes back on and they reboot their desktops, the Devil's screen is blank while Jesus's reviews stayed intact. Frustrated, the Devil asks Jesus why he still has his reviews. Jesus's response, "Jesus saves."
I went to Starbucks and I asked for them to write something offensive on my cup.
They gave me a blank red cup.
Donald Trump visits and old folks' home...
to mingle with the people and pick up a little good P.R. at the same time. He walks up to a sweet old lady in a wheelchair who smiles at him with an other wise blank stare.
"Do you know who I am ?" asks Donald Trump.
She responds, "No, but if you ask the desk, they'll tell you.
A dog goes into a telegraph office
A dog goes into a telegraph office, takes a blank form, and writes: Woof Woof. Woof Woof. Woof Woof. Woof Woof, Woof.
The clerk examines the paper and politely tells the dog: There are only nine words here. You could send another 'Woof' for the same price.
The dog looks confused and replies, But that would make no sense at all."
I have the best blanket in the world
It's the sheet.
Have you ever walked into a room and forgot what you went in for?
I done it the other day, I walked in and completely forgot why - my mind went blank.
3 seconds later I s**... myself.
Gary Johnson is at a fundraiser
Gary Johnson is at a fundraiser for the upcoming election. Worn out from being in the spotlight, he propositions a h**... and heads to a hotel room. Once inside, they rip their clothes off and start making out. She throws him on the bed and seductively asks "Do you enjoy felacio?" He looks at her with a blank face:
"Man, can't anyone cut me a break?"
Letter to a madman
Inside a hospice, a madman approaches the others with a blank paper, examining it with attention. The other crazy people can not resist curiosity and ask:
_ What is it?
The crazy one with the letter, responds
_ A letter from my brother
Even for the other crazy people, that was too absurd.
_ But the letter is blank.
The madman responds serenely
_ We do not talk anymore
You know what they say about blanket statements?
They're all false.
Here's a story about a boy with a strange name...
Once upon a time there was a little boy named Odd. Throughout his childhood he was picked on and bullied ruthlessly because of his name. He was so ashamed of that when he died, he decided to leave his gravestone blank.
Now, years later, whenever they pass his grave they would say, "That's odd."
A monk once explained me the beauty of silence .
I went home and listened to a blank cd on full volume.
My professor wanted me to write an essay on existentialism...
So I passed in a blank sheet of paper
What did the blanket say as it fell off the bed?
Oh sheet
my thesaurus got here yesterday.
But when I opened it, it was blank inside. I have no words for how angry I am.
So ISIS have stockpiled over 10,000 brand new Syrian passports.
I'm seeing a lot of blank faces.
Why was the astronaut's diary blank?
It was filled with space.
Please enter a new password: _____
*Fills in the blank*
MYPENIS
ERROR: Not long enough.
A blanket walks into a bar...
the bouncer stops him at the door and says "sir, you have to pay a cover charge to get in."
In Art Class...
Teacher: Why did you submit a blank sheet?
Student: That's a cow in the field.
Teacher: Field? Where's the grass?
Student: The cow ate it.
Teacher: Then, where's the cow?
Student: There's no grass left, you expect it to stay there..?
What does the blanket say when it falls off the bed?
"Sheet."
I walked into a fancy dress shop and said to the woman, "I'm going to a party tonight, and I want to go as an A4 piece of paper."
She gave me a blank look.
I was confused as to why my interviewer gave me a blank stare when I told her my best quality was my flexibility..
I guess she's never seen a man put both his legs behind his head before.
A kid in school hands in a blank piece of paper for his art homework.
The teacher says, "What's this?"
The kid says, "A picture of a cow eating grass."
The teacher asks, "Where's the grass?"
The kid says, "The cow ate it all."
"Ok, then where's the cow?"
"It left because there was no more grass."
What does a blanket say after beating another blanket at videogames?
Well plaid.
Please dont kill me.
Why did the blanket lie and confess to the m**...?
It was the perfect cover.
Almost everybody I know, has a secured WiFi but a blank WiFi password.
whenever I click 'Show Password' nothing shows up.
Joseph Stalin is walking through a small town when he came upon a little girl
Joseph Stalin was walking through a small town when he came upon a little girl sitting in the doorway of a house. He smiled at her and said "Little girl, do you know who I am?"
The little girl gives him a blank stare.
"You really don't know? I'm the one who gave you everything you have!"
The little girl's face lights up, and she runs into the house shouting "Mum! Mum! Uncle Ivan is home from America!"
On the day I got married, at the ceremony, I stood up and tapped my glass for everyone to be silent.
I held up a fruit and said nothing, scanning the crowd for any sign of pleasure.
All I got was a series of blank expressions, and I could feel my animosity growing as I searched each person, then the next.
"What's wrong with you all?" I finally shouted. "I thought you guys would love my wedding's peach!"
Laziness is the engine of progress.
The accountant printed out 50 absolutely clean sheets on the printer. To the question Why? , she replied that she needed 50 blank sheets, and she did not want to count them manually.
What do you call an artist who had a vasectomy?
Seriously, does anyone know?
I'm drawing a blank here.
How many millennials does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None. They sit in the dark and cry while posting blank pictures to instagram
An English teacher asked her class to write an essay on what they'd do if they had a million dollars.
5 minutes before the bell, Bob handed in a blank sheet of paper. "Bob!" yelled the teacher. "You've done nothing. Why?"
"Because if I had a million dollars, that's exactly what I would do."
This is a good joke to play on others. Pretend you're trying to solve a crossword puzzle- and say aloud "Postman -blank-. Any ideas?"
They'll likely say something like "Postman Pat" to which you reply- "no that doesn't fit.".
Then- if they're not completely thick- they should ask "How many letters?" and you tell 'em "A SACKFUL!"
Then they'll leave in disgust.
I just bought a Mitch Hedburg Album I've never heard before. "Mitch Hedburg: The Lost Jokes"
It was blank.
What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed?
Look out pillow!
I asked my handyman why did he paint my staircase white
He was indeed puzzled. The only thing I got from him is a blank stair
There was a man once who was named "Odd"
He hated his name because he was bullied due to his name in School. His whole life he had to endure people making fun out of him. When he was old and on his death bed, he told his children that his headstone should not have his name and should be blank. After he died, his children fulfilled his wish and put up a blank headstone.
Later when people were passing by his grave, they would look at his blank headstone and say - "Hmmm. Thats Odd".
When I was younger, I jammed a scrabble tile into my nerf gun and shot my brother at close range in the forehead, killing him instantly.
I didn't mean to kill him though, I thought it was a blank.
My biology teacher asked me to make a diagram of bacteria.
When he questioned why I submitted a blank piece of paper, I told him : "it only appears blank because its invisible to the n**... eye"
What did the blanket said when it fell from the bed?
Oh sheet!!
Two Elderly Couples are Having Dinner…
Man #1: We had dinner last week at this amazing restaurant. Four courses and a dessert that was heaven
Man #2: Sounds nice. What was the name of it?
Man #1: Oh jeez, my mind isn't as good as it was, I'm drawing a blank. What's the name of that flower with the thorns on it?
Man #2: You mean a rose?
Man #1: That's it! Hey! Rose! Where did we eat last week?
Why was the child's blanket arrested?
For being an accessory to a kid napping.
