Bitter Jokes

• Short Bitter Jokes
• Bitter One Liners
• Bitter Coffee Jokes
• Bitter Taste Jokes
• Bitter Orange Jokes
• Bitter Salty Jokes
• More Bitter Jokes

Funniest Bitter Short Jokes

Short bitter jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The bitter humour may include short sour jokes also.

1. There's a way of telling if an orange is male or female… If it squirts you in your eye without warning, it's a male.
   If it's bitter for no apparent reason, it's a female.
2. My wife thinks I'm cheating on her with our babysitter... I think she's just bitter because she's never been able to have kids...
3. A Bitter Army Veteran storms into a classroom and shouts "If it weren't for me you'd all be speaking German!" "That's right" replies the German teacher.
4. I get bitterly angry every time my cell phone dies. My therapist suggested I find an outlet.
5. A young man in a chemist's shop asks May I have 3 condoms please, Miss?" Don't 'Miss' me, young man. The bitter older woman scornfully responds.
   Oh sorry, he replied Make that 4 then, please.
6. The man who invented spreadable margarine got scammed out of every penny he made out of it. I can't believe he's not bitter.
7. My taste in women is much like my taste in wine Right now i like them younger, sweeter, and prettier. As i age, i start to like them older, more bitter, and contributing to my alcoholism.
8. What kind of tea is easiest to make? A simplici-tea.
   What kind of tea is most calming?
   A sereni-tea.
   And what kind od tea is most bitter?
   A reali-tea.
9. What is the difference between my ex-girlfriend and a beer? One is pale, bitter and starts off with lots of head and the other one is a beer.
10. A married man is from Mars. A married woman is from Venus. He may have had life a long time ago. She is bitter and smells like farts.

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Bitter One Liners

Which bitter one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with bitter? I can suggest the ones about biting and sweet sour.

1. What's the most bitter tea in existence? Reality
   *cries in the corner*
2. You know why cannibals don't eat divorced women? They're bitter.
   — Garrison Keillor
3. I like my women how I like my coffee Bitter
4. I like my women like I like my beer... ...pale and bitter.
5. Where does coffee go when it dies? A bitter place.
6. I like my coffee like I like my women Not bitter and goes down easily.
7. What do you call a bitter German? Sauerkraut
8. Why was the crow bitter about his job? They fired him with no caws.
9. I like my women how I like my coffee. Cold and bitter.
10. Life is like a cup of coffe. Dark and bitter.
11. I hate suppositories Too bitter.
12. I like my women like I like my beer Tall, red, cold, and bitter.
13. My coffee this morning is like my ex Hot and bitter
14. I've never liked the flavor of cranberries.. the bitter taste *lingers* too much.
15. A depressed French baker sobs bitterly into the dough... His life is pain.

Bitter Coffee Jokes

Here is a list of funny bitter coffee jokes and even better bitter coffee puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• My waiter just spilled coffee all over me. I know it was just an accident, but I'm still bitter.
• I like my coffee how I like my women Ground up, in a bag, and in the fridge. ahh, the nice bitter taste of it...
• My brother and I both like our women like our coffee... He likes them hot and black. I like them cold and bitter.
• The worlds best chat-up line: "I like my women how I like my coffee... Either cheap and bitter or ground up and in the freezer."
• I like my jokes like I like my coffee Bitter and straining every last drop from some ground up stuff of ancient origin.
• I get my women how I get my coffee Bitter, overpriced, and disappointing.
• I like my women how I like my coffee Cold, bitter, a drain on my income, and able to be smelled from across the office.
  Oh and with several d**... inside them.

Bitter Taste Jokes

Here is a list of funny bitter taste jokes and even better bitter taste puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• Doctor: how's the flu medicine going for you? I know it's a little bitter Patient: No, the medicine's fine, can't even taste anything when I take it
• Why don't cannibals eat divorced people? They taste too bitter...
• women come in the same basic taste sensations or flavors as foods- sweet, salty, sour, hot, bitter, and nuts.
• Foot Fetishists are losers They enjoy the bitter taste of **defeat**

Bitter Orange Jokes

Here is a list of funny bitter orange jokes and even better bitter orange puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• Did you know oranges have genders? If one squirts in your eye without warning, it's a male.
  If it's bitter for absolutely no reason, it's female.
• How to tell if your orange is male or female If it squirts in your eye without warning- male
  If it's bitter for no obvious reason- female
• Doctor says I have to stop eating the skin of oranges That was a bitter peel to s**...

Bitter Salty Jokes

Here is a list of funny bitter salty jokes and even better bitter salty puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• If genres were flavors SCI-FI would be sour, Fantasy would be sweet, Horror would be bitter, Mystery would be umami... And Erotica would be salty.
• Why do fish in the north become bitter in the winter time? Runoff from the roadways made them salty

Hilarious Bitter Jokes that Bring Laughter with Friends

What funny jokes about bitter you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean salty jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make bitter pranks.