Birthday Suit Jokes
9 birthday suit jokes and hilarious birthday suit puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about birthday suit that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Birthday Suit Funny Jokes to Tell Your Friends and Kids.
What is a good birthday suit joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
Yo momma so fat...
She can't even fit into her Birthday Suit.
"Daddy, what's a birthday suit?"
"That's the suit I wear for your mother's birthday."
What are the only two suits criminals don't look decent in?
Birthday suits and lawsuits
As I stepped out of the shower, I heard someone in my kitchen downstairs.
Knowing that my wife was out, I grabbed my 1903 heirloom rifle—which no longer works—and crept downstairs, forgetting the fact that I was in my birthday suit.
I came around the corner with the gun raised, only to find my wife loading the dishwasher.
What are you doing? she asked.
I thought I heard an intruder.
I came down to scare him.
Scanning the contours of my doughy, n**... body, she mumbled, You didn't need the gun.
Why I got divorced..........
Last wéek was my birthday.... My wife didnt wish me.... My parents forgot and so did my kids.... I went to work.... Even my colleagues didnt wish me.... As i entered my cabin my secretary said,"Happy Birthday Boss".... i felt so special.... She asked me out to lunch.... After lunch,she invited me to her apartment... WE went there.... She said,"Do you mind if i go into the bedroom for a minute ?" "OKAY",i said... She came out 5min later with a cake And My Wife, My Parents, My Kids ,My Friends & My Colleagues... All Screaming, SURPRISE.... And I was waiting on the sofa......in my birthday suit
In my birthday suit
A mum comes home to find her teenage daughter n**... on the couch.
"Be decent dear; go put on something to cover your nakedness", says the mum.
"I'm not n**..., I'm in my birthday suit", says the daughter.
A few days later, the dad comes home to find his middle-aged wife n**... on the couch.
"Since when do you get n**... around the house; the kids could be coming back at any time", the husband shouts, surprised.
"I'm not n**..., I'm in my birthday suit", claims the wife.
"Next time, you should iron it before you put it on!"
So there was an abandoned church...
and few nuns get sent over to clean it up a bit and restore its former glory. As they were painting the ceiling, one of them says, "Sisters, it is VERY hot in here, and we're working so feverishly, and i really don't want to get any paint on our robes. What say you, we just s**... down, and finish this paint job in our birthday suits. This church has been abandoned for years, and even if somebody comes, we can always throw our robes back on in a second." The other nuns agree.
A few minutes later there's a knock on the door. One of the nuns looks through the mail slot and sees a man standing there. So she says "Who is it?" and the man answers "I'm the blind man."
Relieved the nun opens the door, and the man walks in and says "Nice h**.... Where do you want these blinds?"
A wife arrived home after a long shopping trip, and was horrified to find her husband in bed with a young, lovely thing.
Just as she was about to storm out of the house, her husband stopped her with these words: "Before you leave, I want you to hear how this all came about. Driving home, I saw this young girl, looking poor and tired, I offered her a ride. She was hungry, so I brought her home and fed her some of the roast you had forgotten about in the refrigerator."
Her shoes were worn out so I gave her a pair of your shoes you didn’t wear because they were out of style.
She was cold so I gave her that new birthday sweater you never wore even once because the color didn’t suit you.
Her slacks were worn out so I gave her a pair of yours that you don’t fit into anymore.
Then as she was about to leave the house, she paused and asked, "Is there anything else that your wife doesn’t use anymore?"
"And so, here we are!"
A guy arrived home after a long shopping trip, and was horrified to find his lover in bed with a young, handsome boy.
Just as he was about to storm out of the house, his lover stopped him with these words: "Before you leave, I want you to hear how this all came about:"
"Driving home, I saw this young guy, looking poor and tired, I offered him a ride.
He was hungry, so I brought him home and fed him some of the roast you had forgotten about in the refrigerator.
His shoes were worn out so I gave him a pair of your shoes you didn't wear because they were out of style.
He was cold so I gave him that new birthday sweater you never wore even once because the color didn't suit you.
His trousers were worn out so I gave him a pair of yours that you don't fit into anymore.
Then as he was about to leave the house, he paused and asked, 'Is there anything else that your lover doesn't use anymore?'
"And so, here we are!"
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