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Birthday Candles Jokes

36 birthday candles jokes and hilarious birthday candles puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about birthday candles that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Birthday Candles Short Jokes

Short birthday candles jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The birthday candles humour may include short birthday cake jokes also.

  1. I could never figure out why birthday cake gave me heartburn. Apparently you're supposed to blow out and remove the candles first.
  2. What's the best thing about being born on 9/11/99? You had the two biggest candles on your second birthday.
  3. Doctor, my eyes burn every time I eat birthday cake. Doctor: Next time, take off the candles.
  4. I used to get heartburn every time I ate birthday cake... ...then I learned you're supposed to blow out the candles.
  5. What did the teddy bear say after blowing out the birthday candles? No thanks I'm stuffed!
  6. What's a good way to tell if someone is an arsonist? They don't blow out the candles on their birthday cake.
  7. Patient: Doctor, I get heartburn everything I eat birthday cake Doctor: Have you tried taking the candles off before you eat it?
  8. As a young man, I used to love my birthday parties , but now anytime my birthday candles are lit state law requires that a fire extinguisher be present.
  9. Patient and Doctor Patient: Doctor, I get a strong stinging feeling in my eyes every time I eat a birthday cake."

    Doctor: Next time, blow out the candles.
  10. I was so poor growing up... For my 12th birthday, I got half a cake with 6 candles next to a mirror.

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Birthday Candles One Liners

Which birthday candles one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with birthday candles? I can suggest the ones about birthday cake candles and birthday fish.

  1. I'd hate to be a dragon.


    I'd get so angry trying to blow out my birthday candles.
  2. How do you ruin a dragon's birthday party? Tell him to blow out the candles on his cake.
  3. If you get heartburn every time you eat birthday cake try removing the candles.
  4. You know you're old... When your birthday candles cost more than the cake.
  5. What did the milennial say at his birthday? Yo, these candles are LIT!
  6. If you like blowing candles on your birthday, what does that make you? A gay candle.
  7. What did one candle say to the other? "Don't birthdays burn you up?"
  8. Chuck Norris doesn't blow out brithday candles, they surrender their flames willingly.

Hilarious Birthday Candles Jokes that Bring Laughter with Friends

What funny jokes about birthday candles you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean birthday celebration jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make birthday candles pranks.

Larry was not a good gift giver.

Every time he gave his wife a gift for Christmas, her birthday, or their anniversary, she complained about what a sucky gift it was. She was starting to get angry.
"Larry, the next time you give me a bad gift, I will light it on fire!"
A week later was Larry's wife's birthday. She came down to see only one small box. She sighed and went to go get a lighter. She opened up the present. It was a candle.

I get only one b**... per year

I get only one b**... per year, when I blow the candles on my birthday cake.

My dad got me a cake for my birthday

He told me to make a wish and blow out the candles.
Afterwards, he asked me what I wished for.
I said I wished you wouldn't hit me anymore.
Then you shouldn't have said it out loud.

It was my pet dragon's birthday today

We lit the candles on his cake. He was really upset when he tried to blow them out.

What do you get when you put birthday candles on a pizza?

You can't figure it out? I mean, it's a pizz'a cake.

Birthday wishes

Next time I have a birthday party, before I blow out the candles, I will say: "My wish is that my wish does not come true."
Whereupon I will watch the universe implode.

A local candle shop burned down...

it didnt help that everyone stood outside and sang happy birthday

Why do we put birthday candles on the top of a cake?

Because it is too hard to put them on the bottom.

You know you're getting old when...

By the time you've lit the last candle on the birthday cake, the first one has burned out.

Did you hear that e**...?

That was just the sound of Chuck Norris blowing out his Birthday candles.


^^^Happy ^^^birthday, ^^^Chuck!

You know you're getting old when you have more candles on your cake than friends at your birthday party.

Patient: "Doctor, I get heartburn every time I eat birthday cake." Doctor: "Next time, take off the candles."