Birthday Cake Jokes

125 birthday cake jokes and hilarious birthday cake puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about birthday cake that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Birthday Cake Short Jokes

Short birthday cake jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The birthday cake humour may include short birthday candles jokes also.

  1. I absolutely HATE when people make a post subtly implying that it's their cake day just so people can wish them a happy birthday. You won't catch me doing that today.
  2. The worst thief ever came to my birthday party today. I mean, I've seen other thieves, but this one took the cake.
  3. A man walks into a seafood shop carrying a trout under his arm. "do you make fish cakes?"
    "Yes we do" replies the fishmonger...
    "Great" says the man, ït's his birthday"
  4. I could never figure out why birthday cake gave me heartburn. Apparently you're supposed to blow out and remove the candles first.
  5. The cops in my town are looking for a suspect who they are calling the birthday party thief . I've seen a lot of crazy criminals, … but this one takes the cake.
  6. Fish Cakes A guy walks into a bar with a salmon under his arm and says, "Do you sell fish cakes here?"
    Bartender: No we don't.
    Guy: That's a shame... it's his birthday.
  7. I cut my birthday cake in half and ate both sides. I wanted to halve my cake and eat it too
    Today is my cake day
  8. Man walks into a fishmonger carrying a trout under his arm... He asks the shopkeeper, Do you sell fish cakes?
    Shopkeeper replies Of course!
    Man says, Thank god, it's his birthday!
  9. Doctor, my eyes burn every time I eat birthday cake. Doctor: Next time, take off the candles.
  10. A man walks into a chip shop with a fish under his arm and asks "Do you have any fish cakes?" "No," replies the owner "we've sold out."
    "That's a shame," says the man "it's his birthday."

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Birthday Cake One Liners

Which birthday cake one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with birthday cake? I can suggest the ones about birthday celebration and birthday fish.

  1. Nobody will upvote a cake joke in my birthday I feel desserted
  2. Ever been to a bulimic's birthday party? (fixed) The cake jumps out of the girl.
  3. Sigh, nobody will upvote a cake joke on my birthday I feel so desserted.
  4. Why do hockey players always make terrible birthday cakes? Because icing is not allowed.
  5. What do rats like on their birthday? Mice cream and cake!
    C'mon, you know the rules!!
  6. What does a racist get for their birthday? KK-cake
  7. I went to a bulimic birthday party. First time I've seen the cake come out of the girl.
  8. Nobody will upvote a cake joke in my birthday I feel desserted.
    Happy cake day to me :)
  9. How do you ruin a dragon's birthday party? Tell him to blow out the candles on his cake.
  10. Why are birthday cakes with emos on them the best kind? They cut themselves
  11. If you get heartburn every time you eat birthday cake try removing the candles.
  12. Q: What does a cat like to eat with birthday cake? A: Mice cream!
  13. What does a polygamist family have for dessert every week? Birthday Cake
  14. You know you're old... When your birthday candles cost more than the cake.
  15. A Sad Birthday. It would be very sad to celebrate the Birthday of a Cake.

Birthday Cake Candles Jokes

Here is a list of funny birthday cake candles jokes and even better birthday cake candles puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I used to get heartburn every time I ate birthday cake... ...then I learned you're supposed to blow out the candles.
  • What's a good way to tell if someone is an arsonist? They don't blow out the candles on their birthday cake.
  • Patient: Doctor, I get heartburn everything I eat birthday cake Doctor: Have you tried taking the candles off before you eat it?
  • Patient and Doctor Patient: Doctor, I get a strong stinging feeling in my eyes every time I eat a birthday cake."

    Doctor: Next time, blow out the candles.
  • I was so poor growing up... For my 12th birthday, I got half a cake with 6 candles next to a mirror.
  • It was my pet dragon's birthday today We lit the candles on his cake. He was really upset when he tried to blow them out.
  • What do you get when you put birthday candles on a pizza? You can't figure it out? I mean, it's a pizz'a cake.
  • Why do we put birthday candles on the top of a cake? Because it is too hard to put them on the bottom.
  • You know you're getting old when... By the time you've lit the last candle on the birthday cake, the first one has burned out.
  • You know you're getting old when you have more candles on your cake than friends at your birthday party.

Experience Instant Grins & Giggles with Playful Birthday Cake Jokes

What funny jokes about birthday cake you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean birthday card jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make birthday cake pranks.

Yo momma's so old, the fire department is on standby when you light her birthday cake.

The housewife answered a knock on the door and found a total stranger standing on the doorstep.
"Excuse me for disturbing you, ma'am," he said politely, "but I pass your house every morning on my way to work, and I've noticed that every day you appear to be hitting your son on the head with a loaf of bread."
"That's right."
"Every day you hit him on the head with a loaf of bread, and yet this morning you were beating him with a chocolate cake."
"Well, today is his birthday."

Patient: "Doctor, I get heartburn every time I eat birthday cake." Doctor: "Next time, take off the candles."

I bet the worst part about being a birthday cake is when you're set on fire, and then eaten by the hero that saved you.

It's always a good idea to make friends with babies. That's free cake once a year for a lifetime.

I thought it was my birthday cake but it was just the shed on fire.

The older you get, the more you need to keep a fire extinguisher close to the cake.

Birthdays are nature's way of telling us to eat more cake.

Did you hear about the spy who trashed a kid's birthday party?

He was a good anti-caking agent

My girlfriend made me one of those sculpted 3D cakes for my birthday but wouldn't stop reminding me how it took her all day to decorate it..

..which is surprising since to me it looked like a piece of cake

What happens when no one comes to your birthday party?

You can have your cake and eat it too.

A man walks into the bakers...

A man walks into the bakers with a salmon under his arm. He asks the woman behind the counter "Excuse me, do you serve fish cakes?"
The woman replies, "Of course we don't!"
The man points to the fish and shouts - "Well what am I supposed to do?! Its his birthday!"

What did the janitor get for his birthday?

A u**... cake.

Careful what you wish for!

I don't think I ever got over
my grandmother's death when I was a kid.
My grandmother died from a heart attack
during my ninth birthday party.
Literally while she was eating cake.
And I guess that must have s**... me up a little bit.
I mean, I still have birthday parties.
But now I'm just careful what I wish for.
—Anthony Jeselnik

A man has his 98th birthday

A man has his 98th birthday. They wheel in a giant cake, and a s**... 21-year-old blonde jumps out.
She whispers to him "I can give you some super s**...."
So the old man replies, "Well then, I'll have the soup."

45th birthday

Two weeks ago was my and I wasn't feeling too good that morning. I went to breakfast knowing my wife would be pleasant and say, "Happy Birthday!" and probably would have a present for me.
As it turned out, she didn't even say good morning, let alone any happy birthday. I thought, well, that's wives for you, the children will remember.
The children came in to breakfast and didn't say a word. So when I left for the office, I was feeling pretty low and despondent.
As I walked into my office, my secretary Janet said, "Good morning, Boss. Happy Birthday." And I felt a little better that someone had remembered.
I worked until noon, then Janet knocked on my door and said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day outside, and it's your birthday, let's go to lunch, just you and me."
I said, "By George, that's the greatest thing I've heard all day."Let's go!" We went to lunch.
We didn't go where we normally go; instead we went out to a private little place. We had two martinis and enjoyed lunch tremendously.
On the way back to the office, she said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day. We don't need to go back to the office, do we?"
I said, "No, I guess not." She said, "Let's go to my apartment."
After arriving at her apartment she said, "Boss, if you don't mind, I think I'll go into the bedroom and slip into something more comfortable".
She went into the bedroom and, in about six minutes, she came out carrying a huge birthday cake -- followed by my wife, children, and dozens of our friends, all singing Happy Birthday.
And I just sat there --on the couch -- n**....

Why I got divorced..........

Last wéek was my birthday.... My wife didnt wish me.... My parents forgot and so did my kids.... I went to work.... Even my colleagues didnt wish me.... As i entered my cabin my secretary said,"Happy Birthday Boss".... i felt so special.... She asked me out to lunch.... After lunch,she invited me to her apartment... WE went there.... She said,"Do you mind if i go into the bedroom for a minute ?" "OKAY",i said... She came out 5min later with a cake And My Wife, My Parents, My Kids ,My Friends & My Colleagues... All Screaming, SURPRISE.... And I was waiting on the my birthday suit

A man walks into a fish and chip shop...

A man walks into a fish and chip shop with a live trout under his arm.
"Excuse me, do you sell fish cakes?" he asks.
Looking a little confused, the owner replies, "Yes, of course we do"
"Great" the man responds, smiling at his trout, "It's his birthday."

Birthday at the old-age home

So it's Phil's 90th birthday. All of the residents of the old-age home are there. Suddenly, two people come in with a huge "Happy Birthday" cake. The top of the cake opens up, and out pops a gorgeous b**... blonde in a skimpy bikini. She goes over to Phil, sits on his lap, and says "It's your 90th birthday, and I'm here to give you super s**...."
Phil looks at her and says "Please don't take this the wrong way, but at my age, I'd rather have the soup."

Why did i get Divorced?

Well, last week was my birthday. My wife didn't wish me a happy birthday. My parentsforgot and so did my kids. I went to work and even my colleagues didn't wish me a happy birthday. As I entered my office, my secretary said,"Happy birthday, boss!" I felt so special. She asked me out for lunch. After lunch, she invited me to her apartment. We went there and she said, "Do you mind if I go into the bedroom for a minute?" "Okay," I said. She came out 5 minutes later with a birthday cake, my wife, my parents, my kids, my friends, & my colleagues all yelling, "SURPRISE!!!" while I was waiting on the sofa... n**....

This week, the hospital gave a cake decorated with 50 painted eyes for the optometrist's 50th birthday...

...the following week it was the gynecologist's birthday. He didn't show up.

It's h**...'s birthday today...

I would've had a cake for him but I burned it in the oven.

Happy birthday amazing cup cake wallpapers,chocolate cake pictures

In honor of my cakeday...

Why did the students eat their homework?
Because the teacher said that it was a piece of cake.
What did the ice-cream say to the unhappy birthday cake?
"What's eating you?"
Why did the birthday cake go to the doctor?
Because it was feeling crumby!

A man walks into a bakery...

So a man walks into a bakery with a fish under his arm. When he gets in there, the baker greets him and asks him how he could help the man.
"Do you sell fish cakes?", the man asks the baker.
"No, of course we don't!" the baker replies.
"But it's his birthday!"

What's the difference between a birthday cake and a politician?

If you blow a politician your wish will come true.

A man comes home from work on his birthday.

He's greeted by his crying wife:
"I made you a cake, but the dog ate it :-("
"Don't worry, I'll buy you a new dog."

King Arthur's birthday party at the round table.

King Arthur looked down at the pastries and asked "Are these all Cake?"
"Two are pie" replied Sir Cumference

Went to a bulimic birthday party today...

I saw a cake pop out of a girl.

Irony: I baked a Death By Chocolate Cake...

and gave it to my dog to celebrate his birthday.

"What did you like best about your last job?"

"What did you like best about your last job?"
"Sometimes, people had birthdays and there was free cake."

What did Ray Bradbury put on his Birthday cake?

Icing the Body Electric

My family is so poor

that for my birthday they gave me a picture of a cake.

Today is the Dali Lamas 82nd birthday but he couldn't decide if he wanted a vanilla, chocolate, or strawberry birthday cake... he decided to be made one with everything.

What did the teddy bear say when it was offered some birthday cake?

No thanks, I'm stuffed

My dad got me a cake for my birthday

He told me to make a wish and blow out the candles.
Afterwards, he asked me what I wished for.
I said I wished you wouldn't hit me anymore.
Then you shouldn't have said it out loud.

Remember, tomorrow is Adolf h**...'s birthday

I've got a cake all ready for him in the oven

What's special about a bulimic's birthday party?

Cake jumps out her mouth

In 2011, a $3,200 cake made for Paris Hilton's birthday was stolen by a party crasher by the name of "Paz".

I've heard party crashers do crazy things but that one takes the cake.

The morning of his birthday, Timmy told his mom, I had a dream I got a BB Gun for my birthday. What do you think that dream means?

You'll know what it means tonight, Timmy's mom said with an encouraging smile. That night, after the birthday cake, Timmy's mom came in with a long narrow package and gave it to her son. Timmy tore the box open. Finally I get a BB gun, he thought. But he thought wrong. The box was empty except for a book called The Meaning of Dreams.

I had a birthday cake and decided to share it with my friend.

I decided to cut one quarter of the cake and gave it to him and I kept the rest for myself.
He started crying and whining about how selfish I was.
Me: Alright, so if you were in my position what would you do?
Friend: If it was my birthday cake, I would give you the bigger piece and keep the smaller piece for myself because I'm not selfish.
Me: But that's exactly what I just did so what are you complaining about?

I brought cake and candy to my son's birthday celebration.

And that, officer, is why I told the hostess at Chuck E. Cheese's that I was the sugar daddy looking for my party boy.

Before John was a traveling salesmen

Before John was a traveling salesman he worked door to door on foot. He actually came from an upper middle class family but had a healthy work ethic and a humble yet dull nature from aristocratic inbreeding a few generations back..
It was his birthday and his eccentric mother had told John he could have only one of the two presents she bought for him and she would return the other. After cake , John was led out to the front of the house where he saw a beautiful new dark blue four door sedan. The other choice was a fine black stallion of superior breeding . John looked carefully at both options then yelled Gimme the Karma

I was having the worst possible day. To cap it off my baker s**... up the topping of my birthday dessert!

It was the icing on the cake.

The 90th birthday

An elderly man is celebrating his 90th birthday down at the nursing home and all his friends decide to surprise him by getting him a present. So they wheel in this massive cake and out pops a beautiful young women who looks at the old man and says:
"Hi, I can give you some super s**...!"
So the old man says "Well uuuh... I guess I'll take the soup"

A man walks into a seafood restaurant carrying a fish under his arm

He approaches the owner of the restaurant and says, Does your restaurant serve fish cakes?
The owner responds, Yes, of course!
And the man with the fish says, Good, because it's his birthday.

A man walks into a bar with a fish under his arm...

He asked the barman if they sold any fish cakes. The barman said no and the man pouted. That's a shame, he said, pointing to the fish, it's his birthday!

My birthday was so beautiful

Even the cake was in Tiers
Obligatory cake day post :)
Hope you enjoy it.
I hope everyone is doing well during these tough times. Even if you're not, that is completely understandable and valid. Just know, that I may not know you, but I am supporting you. Sending you all a virtual hug. You may also have a slice of my cake :)


Q: Why do people like writing on their birthday cake?
A: Because they can have their cake and read it too!

Teach a man a joke and he will laugh for a day

Teach a redditor a joke and they will repost it for a lifetime!

What do they serve at birthday parties in heaven? Angel food cake, of course!
Its cake and y'all know the rules!

I actually just realized that cake day is your reddit anniversary and not your birthday because of a notification I just got

It's me. I'm the joke

It's my cake day so here is my cake joke...

A man walks into a bakery with a salmon under his arm and says do you have fish cakes? The man behind the counter replies, No .
That's a pity, it's his birthday

To celebrate my cake day, I decided to post a joke

I got more birthday wishes than my real-life birthday.
[Reddit, thank you for years of facts, hobbies, jokes, and hundreds of unproductive hours]

Dad gets mom a cake for her birthday every year

But for Mother's Day he gives her a cream pie.

Guess what I got my toilet for birthday?

A u**... cake.

jokes about birthday cake