Biker Gang Jokes
23 biker gang jokes and hilarious biker gang puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about biker gang that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Biker Gang Short Jokes
Short biker gang jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The biker gang humour may include short bikers jokes also.
- Man, after joining a Biker Gang: Do we or don't we ride our bikes at the same speed? Biker: Yes, we do. But stop calling it synchronizing our cycles.
- Biker mimes If a group of mimes forms a motorcycle gang....
Do they have to drive electric bikes? - An old guy walks into a biker bar... ... And sits down next to the leader of the gang.
"Your mom is pretty hot, you know?".
The biker chief sips his beer, sighs...
"Just go home, dad.". - What do you call her when St. Nick's wife dumps him to join a biker gang? A rebel without a Claus.
- A new gang of wheelchair bikers have come into town... They call themselves the Rampscallions.
- Deathblade the Biker Gang leader ran over a land mine. He died like he rode: all over the place.
- What did the programmer from the biker gang say? "It ain't gonna be soft where my engine nearing!"
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Biker Gang Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about biker gang you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean gang members jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make biker gang pranks.
There was once a truck driver eating at a diner.
He was enjoying his meal, when a gang of bikers walked in. They started bullying him, by dumping salt and pepper all over him, spitting in his coffee, and stealing his food. To their surprise, the truck driver did nothing, but pay the bill, and walk out of the diner.
As they are marveling about this, the waitress comes up to them. The biker gang says that the truck driver wasn't much of a fighter.
The waitress then looks out into the night and says, He doesn't look to be much of a driver either. He just ran over 3 motorcycles.
A blind man walks into a gay bar.
He walks up to the lesbian bartender and says "hey you wanna hear a blonde joke?". The bartender says "Let me tell you a few things since you're blind, I am a blonde bartender who keeps a shotgun under the table. The bouncer is a 6ft blonde with a 4th degree black belt in judo. The woman beside you is a blonde biker with the local gang. The owner of this bar is a blonde army veteran who did four tours in Iraq. Now do you really want to tell that joke here?". The blind man thinks for a second and says "Naaahh, not if i have to explain it four times."
Joe approached the gates of Heaven and God asked him what he had done in life that made him worthy...
Joe: "I once saw a gang of bikers harassing a woman, so I went up to the biggest and baddest one, gave him a punch across the face, and said 'If you want to mess with her again, you'll have to go through me first.'"
God: "Really? When was that?"
Joe: "About 5 minutes ago."
Two Australians walk into a shady biker bar..
..somewhere in Texas. Inside of course is the whole gang drinking, music stops, crickets...
The boss of the gang asks:
Did you come here to die?
Australians respond:
No, we came in yesterday
Four idiots were in the finals stages of becoming full members of the local skin-head biker gang. Their last assignment was to terrorize some Jews at a bar mitzvah later that afternoon.
They failed their final assignment because the rabbi saw them when they first arrived. He had the four skins immediately removed before they caused any trouble.
An old woman joins a gang.
A little old lady wanted to join a biker club.
She went to a bar where she new they hung out and a big, hairy, bearded biker with tattoos all over his arms was at the entrance.
She proclaims "I want to join your biker club."
The guy was amused and told her that she needed to meet certain biker requirements before she was allowed to join. So the biker asks her "You have a bike?"
The little old lady says "Yea, that's my Harley over there" and points to a Harley parked in the parking lot.
The biker asks her "Do you smoke?"
The little old lady says "Yea, I smoke. I smoke 4 packs of cigarettes a day and a couple of cigars while I'm shooting pool."
The biker is impressed and asks "Well, have you ever been picked up by the Fuzz?"
The little old lady says "No, never been picked up by the fuzz, but I've been swung around by my n**... a few times."
A man dies and meets St. Peter at the gate.
St. Peter greets him, and tells him he can enter heaven on one condition. He must share one good deed he did in his life time. The man says, I was driving down the road, when I say a gang of bikers bullying this little girl. I went up to the leader, punched him and told them to leave the poor girl alone. St. Peter this amazed, and asked him when all of this happened. About 5 minutes ago replies the man
A biker gang comes into a transport cafe
and start picking on a little middle-aged man just sitting down to an all-day breakfast. They steal most of it, spit in his tea, and pull away his chair from under him, until eventually he gives up and walks out silently.
They laugh loudly and say to the waitress "He wasn't much of a man, was he?"
"No," she says, "and he's not much of a truck driver either -- he's just backed an eighteen-wheeler over a whole line of motorbikes."
A woman decided to join a biker gang to see what it was like...
After talking with the club president, a burly tough-looking guy, she was told that she was going to be asked some questions that would be used to decide if she qualified. She had never done anything i**... and had no idea what they expected, so she decided to put on her best bad girl act to impress them.
"OK, first question. Have you ever been picked up by the fuzz?" the biker asked.
After thinking about it for a few seconds she said "No, but I've been swung by my t**... a few times!"
A man wants to join a Alaskan biker gang.
So a man wants to join an Alaskan biker gang and is told by the members he has to do 3 things to get in
1. Drink A fifth of jack
2. Wrestle a bear
3. Make love to an Eskimo women
The man slams the fifth and staggers to his bike and they drive off to the bear cave.
The man lets out a roar and charges into the bear cave. The bikers stand outside and can hear grunts and snarls coming from the cave.
20 or so minutes later the man then staggers out the cave, his clothes torn and covered in blood... He looks at the bikers and says
"Alright, where's this Eskimo women I have to wrestle?!"
A truck driver pulls up to a rest stop to grab a quick meal
A big gang of bikers come in after him. They start to screw with the truck driver, throw food on him, etc, trying to start a fight or something. However the trucker doesn't fight back or say anything at all really. Finally he gets up, pays his bill, and leaves.
After he is gone the leader of the gang says to the waitress, "He wasn't much of a man, was he?"
The waitress takes a look out the window and says "Well he isn't much of a truck driver either, he just ran over seventeen motorcycles!"
I got a good Kiwi Joke
A man walks into a bar and excitedly says to the bar tender, "Hey mate, I got a good Kiwi joke, want to hear it?
The bar tender replies, "I don't know about that bro, I'm a Kiwi"
"No, no, its a good one" the man says.
"Well Jim at the end of the bar is also a Kiwi" says the bar tender. "Those 2 bouncers on the door, they are Maoris, and those 3 guys behind you within ear shot are members of the Mongrel Mob biker gang"
"Are you sure you still want to tell it?" asks the bar tender.
The man pauses for a couple seconds and disappointingly says "No, I suppose your right, I don't want to have to explain it 4 times."
Pearly Gates
A guy is at the pearly gates, waiting to be admitted, while St. Peter is leafing through this Big Book to see if the guy is worthy of entering. Saint Peter goes through the book several times, furrows his brow, and says to the guy, "You know, I can't see that you did anything really good in your life but, you never did anything bad either. Tell you what, if you can tell me of one REALLY good deed that you did in your life, you're in."
The guy thinks for a moment and says, "Yeah, there was this one time when I was driving down the highway and I saw a giant group of k**... Biker Gang Rapists assaulting this poor girl. I slowed down my car to see what was going on, and sure enough, there they were, about 50 of them torturing this girl. Infuriated, I got out
of my car, grabbed a tire iron out of my trunk, and walked straight up to the leader of the gang, a huge guy with a studded leather jacket and a chain running from his nose to his ear. As I walked up to the leader, the k**... Biker Gang Rapists formed a circle around me. So, I ripped the leader's chain off his face and smashed him over the head with the tire iron. Then I turned around and yelled to the rest of them, 'Leave this poor, innocent girl alone! You're all a bunch of sick, deranged animals! Go home before I teach you all a lesson in pain!'"
St. Peter, impressed, says "Really? When did this happen?"
"Oh, about two minutes ago."
Biker
One day there was a biker gang riding along the highway when suddenly they came to a bridge and there was a woman just about to jump off. The head of the gang stopped riding and walked up to her. He said hey what are you doing? She then said jumping off there is no reason to live anymore! Well he said could I kiss you? You are extremely beautiful! Well she said okay. He then reached over and gave her the most passionate French kiss ever. He then said wow why are you gonna kill yourself? Well she said my dad doesn't accept me. What do you mean he said. Well, he doesn't respect men who dress as women
An elderly woman was stopped by the bouncer at this biker bar...
He said, "Before I let you in, I need to ask you some questions. Firstly, since this is a biker bar, do you even have a bike?"
The old lady replied, "Son, did you not see me ride up on my '65 panhead? That's it in the spot up front right there."
"Ok, This is a neutral bar, you're not representing some h**... gang are you? We try to avoid gang politics here."
She replied, "Well, I was a h**...'s Angel, but I'm retired...so what else?"
He asked, "Well, have you ever been picked up by the Fuzz?"
She thought about it for a moment and said, "Not that I can recall, But I have been swung 'round by my n**..., is that good enough?"
A man dies and goes to Heaven
As he stands in front of the Pearly Gates St. Peter says to the man, "Now before I let you into Heaven, I need to ask, what have you done to deserve it?"
The man thinks for a bit and says. "Well, there was this biker gang outside of a bar once. They were harassing this poor woman. So I walked right up to the leader, slapped him across the face, and told him to leave this woman alone!"
St. Peter is impressed. "When exactly did this happen?" He asks.
"About five minutes ago," the man replies.