Big Deal Jokes
142 big deal jokes and hilarious big deal puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about big deal that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Big Deal Short Jokes
Short big deal jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The big deal humour may include short big issue jokes also.
- People make such a big deal about vegans, but I don't get it. I've never had a beef with one.
- In New York City, a fisherman reeled in a 250 pound catfish 6 feet 6 inches long. I don't get what the big deal is. I do that on Tinder every day.
- This St. Patrick's day I drank too much and had to take a bus home. That may not be a big deal to you, but I've never driven a bus before.
- People always tell me I shouldn't give my cat a bath... I don't see what the big deal is. Honestly, it's fine once I get all the hair off my tongue.
- The USA is proud because their Founding Fathers had strong convictions Big deal the founders of Australia had convictions too.
- I genuinely complemented on a coworkers moustache, Now she's making a big deal with HR about it.
- Why is Alzheimer's better than Parkinson's? Because it's no big deal to forget a beer but a tragedy to spill a beer.
- Names T Rex and I can meet your needs for handheld weaponry... I'm kind of a big deal in the small arms trade
- They're playing with the largest deck of cards ever at this year's World Series of Poker. It's a pretty big deal.
- Pizza Joke If you slice up a large pizza, that's no big deal.
But if you slice up a medium, you can get jail time.
And she should have seen it coming.
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Big Deal One Liners
Which big deal one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with big deal? I can suggest the ones about significant and big spot.
- I don't know what the big deal is about Black Friday. All Fridays matter.
- I got a comically small deck of playing cards for my birthday. It wasn't a big deal.
- Some people say turning 20 isn't a big deal, But to me it's a score.
- The reopening of Lego World in 2021 was a big deal. People were lined up for blocks.
- I don't see what's the big deal about driverless cars. Every parking lot is full of them.
- Why was the biblical Flood such a big deal? Why couldn't just God dam it?
- It wasn't a big deal when the solider got an STI It was an honorable discharge.
- Christians will make a big deal about a cross But do you think Jesus is attached to it?
- I dont see whats the big deal with china. its the tea you pour that really matters.
- I can never remember what NBD stands for. But I guess it's no big deal.
- As far as things go erectile dysfunction is not that big of a deal.
- Did you hear about the new element discovered in Canada? It's a pretty big deal, [Eh]?
- I have a tiny pack of cards. It's no big deal.
- People who grew up in the 90s, was '2000' a big deal to you? It meant a ton to me
- I don't see the big deal with Charlottesville... It seems pretty black and white to me.
Big Deal Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about big deal you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean important jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make big deal pranks.
While on a date a women goes to the bathroom
Man: Uh... wrong way that's the men's room
Woman: Oh my GOD! this is so embarrassing!
Man: It's not a big deal.
Woman: I guess not, but you know what they say, old habits die hard.
Man: ...............
Two men are chatting;
"My son asked me: 'Daddy, where do children come from?'"
"It's not a big deal... Today kids are interested in that matter on the early years."
"Yeah men, but the real issue here is that my son is... married... for five years!"
I messed up during a guitar recital.
I didn't think it was a big deal, bit it turned out to a A Major mistake...
A married couple is having a baby...
As she is going into labor, the doctor asks the man, "would you like to take part in this new technology that allows half the pain of the pregnancy to be put on to the father." The husband accepts, and they go on with the birth. Afterwards they ask him how he felt, he replied, "I didn't feel anything I don't understand what the big deal is about this. Later that day, they find the postman dead at their house.
New Earring
John is at work one day when he notices that his
co-worker, Zach, is wearing an earring.
This man knows his co-worker to be a normally conservative fellow, and is curious about his sudden change in "fashion".
"Hey Zach" he yells out "I didn't know you were into earrings."
"Don't make such a big deal out of it, ..it's only an
earring." Says Zach sheepishly.
"No really," probes John, "How long have you been wearing one?"
... "Ever since my wife found it in our bed."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
So, I bumped into this cute g**... the way out of the grocery store...
We talked for a bit and ended up exchanging numbers. I'm trying not to make a big deal about it, but I'm pretty bummed that my insurance rates are going to go up.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Both Golf
"Honey, I have a confession to make," a guy told his bride. "I'm a golf nut. You'll never see me on weekends during golf season. "
"Well, dear," she murmured. "I have a confession to make too. I'm a h**.... "
"No big deal," replied the groom. "Just keep your head down and your left arm straight! "
A multimillionaire goes to a psychologist
So, the multimillionaire is lying there on the couch, and he says, "I have this problem where I buy things. Big things, little things. It doesn't matter if it's a good deal or not. It doesn't matter whether or not I need it. It's the thrill of the purchase. In fact, yesterday I pulled out my wallet, and I bought an entire mall."
So the psychologist thinks for a little while, and finally says, "Then it sounds like you have a shopping complex."
Our neighbors got really annoyed at me after I played catch with their son yesterday.
But in fairness, I couldn't find a ball, and the kid actually seemed to enjoy getting tossed back and forth. So I don't know what the big deal is.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Stonehenge whats the big deal
I dont understand why everyone travels miles to see stonehenge. So what it was made by aliens, so was my drive way
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Chuck Norris is a creative kind of guy...
Chuck Norris is a creative kind of guy, the last time he f**... it was quite a big deal. Scientifically speaking, they call it the big bang.
Petting Zoo
A woman at a petting zoo bent down to pet a pony. She began to cough violently. A man came over to her an asked her to leave. She said,"What? It's no big deal! I'm just feeling a little hoarse!"
Over smart.
A young businessman had just started his own firm. He had just rented a beautiful office and had it furnished with antiques.
He saw a man come into the outer office. Wishing to appear the hot shot, the businessman picked up the phone and started to pretend he had a big deal working. He threw huge figures around and made giant commitments.
Finally he hung up and asked the visitor, "Can I help you?"
"Yeah, I've come to activate your phone lines."
A day in court....
A man appears before a judge one day, asking for divorce.
The judge quietly reviews some papers and then says, "Please tell me why you are seeking a divorce?"
"Because," the man says, "I live in a two-story house."
The judge replies, "What kind of a reason is that? What is the big deal about a two-story house?"
The man answers, "Well one story is I have a headache and the other story is It's that time of the month!"
When "Tickle Me Elmo" was a big deal, there had to be a quality assurance department...
Imagine, a whole group of people whose job was to test tickles.
Man walks into a bar and orders a water...
The bartender, looking puzzled, says to the guy "but you were just in here last night getting hammered. What gives?"
The man responds, "Yeah, I quit drinking after I went home last night and blew chunks."
The bartender says, "That's not a big deal man. Everyone does it."
And the man says, "you don't understand. Chunks is my dog."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
So me and my p**... friends have a weekly gathering...
Every week one of us brings a talent down the pub to show the others - this time it was my turn.
I brought along my guitar and after some Dutch courage I began to play.
Within a few seconds of starting the guys started cheering me on, one of them was even weeping, saying how amazing the song was.
I had no idea what the big deal was, I was just f**... A minor.
When people say they're a foodie it's no big deal..
but when people find I'm a drinker they're all "stop the car" and "we're calling the police".
I don't know why hippies made such a big deal out of it...
all their records were groovy. All of them.
-your dad
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I don't understand the big deal about same s**... marriage
Ask any married couple, they'll tell you the s**... has been the same for years
A lot of people make a big deal about age differences in couples. As far as I'm concerned a girl is fair game as soon as she's finished school.
So usually at about 3:15
Philippe Petit walked between the twin towers in 1974, big deal, I can do that today with no training.
Just made that up, I hope it's not too soon.
Not knowing that it's called "baby corn" isn't a big deal...
...but everyone looked at me REALLY weird when I said "oooh, I LOVE child corn" in a crowded restaurant.
Sea World threw me out for trying to ride the manatee
What's the big deal? It's not like I did it on porpoise!
I'm in trouble with my wife. I totally forgot her 'special birthday' that was such a big deal apparently.
Still, everything went fine and it was a healthy baby boy!
The phone bill was exceptionally high. Man called a family meeting to discuss ....
Dad: This is unacceptable. I don't use home phone, I use my work phone.
Mum: Me too. I hardly use home phone. I use my companies phone
Son: I use my office mobile, I never use the home phone.
All of them shocked and together looked at the maid who's patiently listening to them.
Maid: "What? So we all use our work phones. What's the Big deal??
😂😆
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How is s**... like air?
It's no big deal unless you're not getting any.
Why is the media making such a big deal about the olympic swimmer's period?
It's a perfectly normal female body function that, according to my wife, occurs 2-3 times per month.
Everyone is surprised when I tell them I've never seen the movie fight club
I don't see what the big deal is. No one really talks about it.
What does nbd stand for?
Never mind, it's no big deal.
A joke from Korea
"Americans are saying that in 2016, they will either have their first woman president, or their first insane president.
Like what's the big deal? Korea did both in one election cycle back in 2012"
I spotted a member of one direction yesterday..
and my friend who hates them said, "that's like spotting a tumor". To which I said, "not really, it's big deal when you spot a tumor"
I took a bus home last night
That may not be a big deal to you, but I have never reposted before.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Last year my ex got mad at me because I was m**... during a shower..
..which usually wouldn't be a big deal, but.... It was a baby shower.
I used to think it was no big deal that my gums bled whenever I flossed, but I talked to my dentist about it and she said that it can actually be a bad sign.
So now I never floss.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
So I was at the s**... club the other day, and the dancer comes over, takes my glasses, and goes back to dancing on stage.
No big deal. She then comes back, puts my glasses on me, and requests that I tip her. I refused, she asked why, and I told her "You stole my glasses, I couldn't see anything".
Everybody's making a big deal about the Mexican president canceling his meeting with Trump...
The wall isn't even built yet and it's already kept out at least one Mexican.
I don't get football....
At the beginning of the game, they flip a quarter to see who kicks off first. Then the rest of the game everybody just keeps trying to "get the quarter back". I mean, it's just a quarter, what's the big deal!?!
Rumor has it Tom Hanks just signed a deal to star in a sequel to one of his greatest 80s blockbusters.
Big, if true.
There are so many starving children in the world,
I don't understand why the police made such a big deal about the ones in my basement.
I don't see why the Paris agreement is such a big deal
Thousands of guys have pulled out of Paris before
I don't get what the big deal is about having ASMR
Not being able to breath properly isn't very nice and anyway, you don't spell it like that.
I don't know what's the big deal about bidets.
The sink's been right there the whole time and you barely have to hop up at all.
How do you know "Pinocchio" was written a long time ago?
He kept making such a big deal out of being wireless.
I accidentally saw my strawberries macerating in the refrigerator
It wasn't a big deal or anything. It's perfectly natural.
I don't get what the big deal about an eclipse is...
There's one every night from like 7pm until 5am...
The toilet brush
A man walks into a store looking for a toilet brush. The store owner shows him a variety of brushes at various pricepoints. The man thinks for a little while, then buys the cheapest one.
The next day the man is back at the store. "Were you unhappy with your purchase?" asks the shopkeeper. "We have other models that might work better."
The man agrees and buys a little more expensive one.
The next day the man is back yet again. The shopkeeper, visually puzzled on how a toilet brush can be such a big deal, asks "What's the matter, didn't like the new one either?"
"Well" replies the man. "To be honest it *was* pretty effective. But I gotta say, I prefer toilet paper!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
After 10yrs of marriage is finding out that your spouse s**... 500+ d**... before getting hitched a big deal?
Because I think my wife is just overreacting?
An engaged man asked his father for advice for a long and happy marriage...
Dad, you and Mom have been happily married for 28 years now. How do you do it?
"That's easy son, when your Mom and I first got married, we made a deal. She would make all the little decisions, and I would make all the big decisions. "
Hey, that sounds like a good arrangement. But how do you decide what's a big decision, and what's a little decision?
"Oh, there hasn't been any big decisions yet."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why isn't it a big deal to get s**... into a black hole?
Cause in there, nothing is the matter.
The new tenants
Landlord: How are the new tenants above you.
Renter: They are ok. But it sounds like they are bang on the floor every night at 1 in the morning.
Landlord: That is outrageous. I will talk to them at once.
Renter: No. It is really not that big of a deal. I am usually up then practising my trumpet.
Net Neutrality is not that big of deal...
Wouldn't you appreciate the sense of pride and accomplishment that paying for websites gives you?
I don't get why everyone makes such a big deal about the cold weather.
I'm out in it right now and I can't feel a thing!
An American and a Russian were discussing their respective freedoms in the 1980's
American: We have more freedom. I can go over to the president and say "Mr. Reagan, I don't like the way you are running this country".
Russian: What's the big deal in that? I too can go to my president and say "Mr. President, I don't like the way Reagan is running his country".
Coffee drinking trio
3 friends are bragging about their coffee drinking habits.
1st: I take it dark, thick and black. It's so strong, the spoon stands upright in my cup when I stir it.
2nd: big deal, at least you use a cup. I pour it directly from the kettle into my mouth.
3rd: yeah? We'll I don't even use a kettle. I chew the coffee beans, drink some water and just go sit on the stove for a while.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
For like a week every month, my wife will make a big deal out of the smallest things
I think she's just o**... acting
I don't get what the big deal is with spiders. Why is everyone so scared of them?
I got to know the spider living in the corner of my room. We talked about our dreams and goals, he wants to be a Web designer.
I don't understand what the big deal with slavery was.
From the sounds of it, a lot of them were educated since so many of them had their Masters.
John Bolton and President Trump are meeting in the White House
Bolton reads off a report to Trump and says "Today, in the war on drugs we lost 2 Brazilian soldiers."
Donald breaks down crying, sobbing uncontrollably.
John Bolton cringes and says "There's no reason to be upset, this isn't a big deal."
Donald replies, "Wait, remind me... How many is a brazilian?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What's the big deal with same-s**... marriage? I've been having the same s**... with my wife for years.
She's a man.
Tom Hiddleston doesn't make a big deal about all the success he had in the MCU
Plays it Loki
I finally realized why the painting of Washington crossing the Delaware is such a big deal
It depicts the last time someone willingly entered New Jersey.
Curiosity just found organic molecules preserved in rock on Mars.
Big deal, if you go to my room right now you can find organic molecules preserved in a sock.
The bank denied my Mortgage application
I don't know what the big deal is. I was just asking for a small loan of $1,000,000
My wife went to Jupiter and found pictures of me and a mistress.
She was crushed. My mistress asked what the big deal was... she didn't understand the gravity of the situation.
Why do people even make a big deal about Houndini escaping straightjackets?
I mean, just paint it every color of the rainbow, then boom, no straightjacket.
The head of KFC called the Pope
He said, "I'll give you a million dollars to change the Lord's prayer to give us our daily chicken."
The Pope said no and hung up.
kfc called back and offered 10 million.
The Pope said no and hung up.
KFC called back and offered 100 million.
The Pope said, "You have a deal!"
The Pope got all the churches big wigs together and said, "I have good news and bad news. Good news is, we are 100 million richer. Bad news is, we lost the Wonder Bread account.
I don't get why people make drinking and getting high such a big deal.
As long as you do both in equal amounts, being complete opposites, they'll cancel each other out!