Biden Jokes

Biden jokes are flying around the internet! Here's a collection of the best ones we could find.

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jokes about biden

Best Short Biden Jokes

These are our top biden puns. Have fun with a good biden joke in English with simple biden humour.

  1. If trump wins the election, I will leave the United States If Biden wins the election, I will leave the United States
    This is not a political post, I just want to travel
  2. If Biden is elected, I'm leaving the country If Trump is reelected, I'm leaving the country.
    This is not a political post. I just want to travel.
  3. President Biden has announced water is now only legal in three states. Solid, liquid and gas.
  4. President Biden ordered an F16 missile attack to destroy the Chinese spy balloon Americans are thrilled. It's the first thing he's done to combat inflation.
  5. Barack Obama is having a race with joe Biden around the white house. After finishing the race Obama says "Whew, just under 10 minutes. Did I break the record?"
    Biden replies "No, Bush did 9:11."
  6. If Biden is elected, I stay in the country If Trump is reelected, I stay in the country.
    This is not a political post, I just can't leave because coronavirus.
  7. Biden had a meeting with his cabinet this morning then he talked to the bookcase for a while, and now he's arguing with the couch!
  8. While Donald Trump is out there, causing a fuss, what is his opponent doing? He is just waiting around like an average Joe, Biden his time.
  9. I hope Joe Biden will run for president in 2020 Because when he announces it he's able to say that he's been Biden his time.....
    I'm sorry
  10. Hopefully, Biden will never be the leader of my country Because if he is, something's gone wrong with the Canadian legal system
Biden joke, Hopefully, Biden will never be the leader of my country

Make fun with this list of one liners, gags and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor found in these biden jokes can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of biden puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, these jokes offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Biden One Liners

Which biden dad jokes are funny enough to crack down and make fun with biden?

  1. Trump and Biden are trapped on island. Who survives? America
  2. What did Trump say to Biden in the hallway of the white house? Pardon me, please.
  3. My girlfriend told me she will leave me if I don't support Trump... I said ok.. Biden
  4. Who would win in a street fight between Joe Biden and Donald Trump? Everyone watching
  5. If Joe Biden's wife is called the First Lady, then what do you call his mother? Joe mama
  6. Joe Biden is not my president!! At least not till January which won't come soon enough.
  7. What is a government mandate? When Obama and Biden go out to dinner together.
  8. My girlfriend said she would leave me if I didn't support Trump I said "Biden"
  9. What's Obama say to Biden when he leaves the room after a argument? Good bi-den
  10. Someone asked President Biden, "Boxers or briefs?" He said, "Depends."
  11. President Joe Biden just had a meeting with the Cabinet. Now he's talking with the couch
  12. What do you call Joe Biden's mom Joe mama
  13. Why I won't be voting for Trump or Biden I'm Indian
  14. Why does joe Biden use a Mac? Because apparently he doesn't want you to have windows.
  15. When Joe Biden becomes president The white house will be forbiden.

Biden Obama Jokes

Here is a list of funny biden obama jokes and even better biden obama puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • With Biden declared the winner, regardless of what side of the political spectrum you're on, I think we can all safely say... Thanks, Obama.
  • What do you call it when President Obama What do you call it when President Obama and Joe Biden talk shop over a nice dinner?
    A government man-date.
    Boom. I'll be here all night.
  • Obama ran around the whitehouse with Biden. Their total time was 9:48. When they had finished Biden said "Hey Barack, did we beat the record?" Out of breath Obama said "No, Bush did 9:11"
  • Do you think Obama's going to deal with Russia while he's still in office? Nah, I think he's Biden his time.
  • Everyone thought that Obama's Vice President was done with politics after 2016, but now he's considering running for president in 2020. I guess he was just Biden his time.
  • I say we have a new holiday called Incumbent's day We coax Biden out of the White House and if he sees his shadow, it'll be four more years of Obama.
  • You don't hear much from our Vice President.... Obama zipped him up and he's a-biden.

Jill Biden Jokes

Here is a list of funny jill biden jokes and even better jill biden puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • How will Joe and Jill Biden spend thanksgiving with proper social distancing? Biden selves.
Biden joke, How will Joe and Jill Biden spend thanksgiving with proper social distancing?

Uproarious Biden Jokes to Share with Friends

What funny jokes about biden to tell and make people laugh ? Check out these list of good jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make biden prank.

What is the difference between a Joe Biden speech and a Donald Trump speech?

When Biden is speaking you wonder if he's had a s**....
When Trump is speaking you wonder if you've had a s**....

Donald Trump and Joe Biden are on a plane heading straight towards a volcano. Who survives?

The United States of America.

It's 2021, and President Joe Biden is told he needs to assemble a cabinet

Coming back from IKEA, he realizes he's greatly misunderstood the task

Say what you will about Trump

But it was pretty nice of him to air such a long ad for Biden free of charge

Biden and Barack don't tell each other "yo mama" jokes...

they tell each other Jo 'Bama jokes.
(I'm sorry, it's terrible)

What do Joe Biden and trans people have in common?

Republicans want to block their transition

two h**... trump supporters die and ascend to heaven.

God meets them at the pearly gates and asks if they have any questions.
One of them says, yes, what were the real results of the 2020 election and who was behind the fraud? .
God says, "my son, there was no fraud. Biden won the electoral college fair and square, 306 to 232 .
After a few seconds of stunned silence, the o**... turns to the other and whispers, This goes higher up than we thought .

Joe Biden and Donald Trump are standing in front of a large crowd.

As they are waving to everyone, Biden leans towards Trump saying,
Did you know, that with one little wave of my hand, I can make every person in this crowd go wild with joy? Also, this joy will not be merely a momentary display, like that of your followers, but will go deep into their hearts, and for the rest of their lives, whenever they speak of this day, they will rejoice!
Trump replies, I seriously doubt that, with one wave of your hand? Come on, show me!
So Biden slapped him.

Two Trump supporters die and go to heaven

God meets them at the pearly gates and asks if they have any questions. One of them says, Yes, what were the real results of the 2020 election and who was behind the fraud?
God says, "My son, there was no fraud. Biden won the electoral college fair and square, 306 to 232.
After a few seconds of stunned silence, the o**... turns to the other and whispers, This goes higher up than we thought.

Trump: I want to see Biden in prison!

Biden: Why does Trump think I would visit him in prison?

You want further proof that Biden is already the better president?

He's got 23 million more twitter followers than Trump.

If Biden unfucks any more of Trump's mistakes any faster...

There'll be no Ivanka and Jr. by Sunday.

A cold snap across the United States has seen Texas dealing with temperatures as low as -18

The demand for electricity has led to blackouts across the state, causing some people to go without Fox News for so long, they've stopped blaming the weather on Joe Biden.

President Biden visits a fully vaccinated senior home

After a heartful speech in which he thanked the staff for their effort and the residents for their sacrifices he was doing the hand-shaking round. As he greeted a particular old woman who appeared to be quite "out of it", he asked her, "Do you know who I am?". Her response was simply, "No, but there's a nice woman at the front desk who can tell you!"

President Joe Biden announced that he would give a free bottle of Bud Light to anyone who got a vaccine.

Not to be outdone, the next day, the President Obrador of Mexico announced that he would give a bottle of Corona to anyone who got a vaccine.
The day after, the President Higgins of Ireland announced that he'd be giving out free bottles of water.
Biden and Obrador were confused and gave the Irish President a Zoom call. "We kinda expected you to give out free Guiness, being from Ireland and all"
The Irish President replied: "Well, if you guys aren't giving out beer, then neither am I."

What's the best thing about being Joe Biden?

Waking up every day and learning that you're the president.

Joe Biden had a meeting with the cabinet today

He also spoke to the bookcase and argued with the desk.

Two conspiracy theorists die and go to heaven...

God: welcome to the St. Peter's Gates. With my omniscient knowledge, I can tell you anything you wish to know.
Conspiracy Theorist 1: Who won the 2020 US Presidential Election?
God: Joseph R. Biden
Conspiracy Theorist 2: \*Looks at his friend\* s**... dude, this goes even deeper than we thought

Boxers or Briefs, Mr. President?

In 1992 while being interviewed by MTV, Bill Clinton was asked if he wore boxers or briefs? Clinton replied, "Boxers"
In 2008 US magazine asked Obama, "Boxers or briefs"? Obama declined to answer the question.
Last week AARP asked Joe Biden, "Boxers or briefs"? Biden responded, "Depends".

Pope Francis, Donald Trump, Joe Biden, and a little boy are crossing the Atlantic on an airplane when the engines fail.

They find three parachutes.
Donald Trump grabs the first parachute and jumps out of the plane saying, The world needs a great person like me!
Joe Biden grabs a parachute and says, I need to help make choices for our world , so he jumps off the plane. 
At this point, the Pope and the little boy are on the plane. 
The Pope says to the boy, take the last parachute, I am too old and I'm going to die soon one day.  
Actually there are two left. Donald Trump took my backpack.

Presidential

Jill and Joe Biden go to a steakhouse for dinner. Jill says, I will have the petite filet medium rare with a baked potato with sour cream and butter. The waiter asks, What about your vegetable? Jill replies, Oh, he will have the same.

Joe Biden called a press conference, to discuss his meeting with Vladimir Putin…

The good news, is that Mr Putin told me that he wants peace.
After everyone cheered and clapped in relief, he added the bad news…
A piece of Crimea, a piece of Ukraine, a piece of Finland…

Putin, Biden and Zelensky are all in a hot air balloon

Putin, Biden and Zelensky are all in a hot air balloon and it's starting to lose altitude. They need to lose some weight to stop from crashing.
Putin throws out a bottle of v**... and says don't worry I've got too much of that in my country anyway
Biden throws out an AR-15 and says don't worry I've got too much of that in my country anyway
Zelensky throws out Putin and says don't worry I've got too much of that in my country anyway and looks at Biden smugly as they c**... anyways due to the massive weight of Zelensky's b**....

President Biden has called for full legalization of m**...

Now it is up to Congress to hold a joint session.

Even before being President Joe Biden could access any restricted Area

All those places are usually for Biden

I'm not sure about the current US government

Kinda feels like they're just Biden time until the next election..

Yo mama so fat…

Biden just shot her out of the sky

What healthy item does Joe Biden enjoy eating?

Forbiden fruit

Biden joke, Biden had a meeting with his cabinet this morning

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like kids and toddlers can enjoy. They can be verbal, as in a play on words, or narrative, often involving a set-up and a punchline. JokoJokes has it all! Jokes in Spanish are also found. Teens are often joking with 4 year olds and 6 year olds. Found out more in our Jokes FAQ section

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The impact of these biden jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.