The Best 18 Bets Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Bets jokes. There are some bets pays jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these bets blackjack puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Bets Jokes and Puns

Why don't cows make large bets?

The steaks are too high.

A man bets his friend he can mildly irritate everyone by saying and doing nothing.

How can tell if there's an Italian at the cockfight?

He brings the duck

How can you tell if there's a Sicilian at the cockfight?

He bets on the duck

How can you tell if the Mafia is at the cockfight?

The duck wins

Bets joke, How can tell if there's an Italian at the cockfight?

I just put a bottle antifreeze in the freezer.

Place your bets now.

A beautiful blonde walks up to a craps table...

She bets ten thousand on one roll of the dice. She says, "I hope you don't mind, but I feel luckier when I'm nude."

She strips down and rolls the dice. When she sees the dice she jumps for joy screaming "I won! I won!" She hugs the dealers, takes her winnings and leaves.

Finally, one of the dealers asks, "What did she roll?" The other says, "I thought you were watching!"

It goes to show: Not all blondes are dumb, but men will always be men.

Betsy DeVos wants to eliminate trigonometry from school math curricula

because it teaches our children to sin

Betsy DeVos's school funding plan...

You start with $0.

But if you sign up 5 kids for school, and those kids sign up 5 more kids, and THOSE kids sign up 5 more kids...

Bets joke, Betsy DeVos's school funding plan...

Why does Betsy look so distracted

Her husband devos her

I always liked doing I swear I'll shave my head...

...if the cancer results come back positive.

I was concerned about my gambling problem... I came up with a great solution, on the way home from the bookies I threw all my receipts into a bush.

I was hedging my bets.

High aunt

My family have a tradition of placing bets on how high they can hoist my mother's sister. I keep telling them to stop as it will end in disaster but they just keep upping the ante each year...


You can explore bets powerball reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean bets marilyn dad jokes. There are also bets puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

A hooker bets a man 100 dollars that she can give him a erection

The man agrees and they bolth go back to his place.
The hooker tried to give him an erection for an entire hour but when the hour was up the man was still flacid.

The hooker gives the man 100 dollars, but before she leaves she asks the man what he was going to spend the money on...

He says "My erectile dysfunction pills"

Betsy Devos wants to defund the Special Olympics

Talk about kicking someone when they're Downs

My friend takes bets on who's the ugliest person in a crowd.

He's a FaceBookie.

I used to make bets with a cop that he'd never get away with assault.

He beat me every time.

So Betsy DeVos resigned...

I guess some people were starting to pressure her to invoke the 25th amendment and she got scared because she can't count that high.

Bets joke, So Betsy DeVos resigned...

Guy walks into a bar and bets the owner $500 that he can stand on one end and piss without getting any on the bar.

The owner takes the bet because the bar is about fifty feet long. So the guy whips it out and sure enough he only pisses about 4 feet all over the bar. The owner laughs as he collects his money and cleans up the bar.

He asks the guy who pissed why he seems so happy.
The guy says: You see that table in back? I bet the 5 guys there 10 grand that you would let me piss on the bar and laugh and clean it up.

Why are sports bets illegal for the composer?

He arranges the score

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the bets cockfight jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working bets bet piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes